


The Heart in My Hand

by chayron



Category: Bleach
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst and Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-11-07
Updated: 2015-08-05
Packaged: 2017-12-31 19:32:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 21
Words: 89,530
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1035544
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chayron/pseuds/chayron
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ichigo has to make a quick decision when Ulquiorra appears in front of him again. He saves Ulquiorra and is slowly pulled into the Arrancar’s pace.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Part 1

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach – it belongs to its respective owners. This fan fiction is not a commercial project, and I am not making any money from writing it.  
> Warnings:  
> 1\. Yaoi (male x male). Ulquiorra x Ichigo and vice versa. Other pairings?  
> 2\. Ichigo – almost 19 years old; Ulquiorra – probably a few hundred as a Hollow and about a decade or so as an Arrancar?  
> 3\. Post anime (haven’t read the manga).  
> 4\. Alternate Universe.  
> 5\. I’m not a native speaker, thus expect various language oddities.  
> 6\. I’m not very familiar with all the details in the anime, and I am also new to Bleach fandom, so I will be straying away from the canon quite frequently. I do my research but Bleach is a vast universe that is not so easy to grasp. I must admit, though, that there are also things in the anime that don’t make sense to me and I take the liberty of recreating certain parts of this universe as I see fit.  
> 

**The Heart in My Hand**

by chayron (lttomb@yahoo.com), beta-read by Ash and Athena

Part 1

Hot needles were pricking his entire body. Every tip was being driven deeper and deeper into his flesh. The pain was intense, searing. Hundreds of sharp pangs were seeping throughout his body, accumulating somewhere in the back of his skull. They were forming a white hot spear that was threatening to pierce his brain at any given moment. The only thing he could do was keep the pain away. There were no coherent thoughts in his head, just this – to withstand the pain. Always the same. How long had it been now?

He was floating in a sticky formless mass, surrounded by darkness. He could neither move his arms nor legs. He wasn’t certain he still had them. Had there even been a time when he had them? He could not exactly remember. Really, how long had it been?

Besides the searing pain at the back of his skull, he suddenly felt a twinge in his chest. It started to spread quickly, creating a burning sensation that was new to him. Surprised, he tried to harness this new source of pain as well. It escaped him, though. He would suppress it and it would slip from his grasp. His lungs were on fire, and he started choking. There was a certain ruthlessness somewhere deep inside him, and the painful prickling sensation of needles that he was still managing to keep at bay. There was also the knowledge of the fact that he, apparently, had lungs and he was suffocating. The black sticky mass surrounding him was filling his throat and nose. The pain in his lungs was becoming worse and worse. He needed air.

Really, how long had it been?

With a gasp, he opened his eyes. His sight was blurry, but he could tell that there was a black-haired woman leaning over him. She was looking at him, her mouth moving to form words, but all he could hear was booming sounds ringing through his cotton-filled ears. She wasn’t talking to him, though. He noticed movement on his right. He couldn’t tell what it was but he could feel the danger. His attention was then quickly drawn to the woman, who suddenly grabbed his right arm. She brandished a syringe.

The woman’s neck snapped in his left hand like a twig. Her limp fingers unwound from the syringe and it fell to the floor. He dropped the body and shifted, trying to sit up. It took him a few minutes to get into a sitting position. During that time, he had been waiting for the second thing in the room to attack him. His vision was hazy, even worse than it had been before; everything around him was blotchy. Panting for air and dripping with sweat, he finally managed to discern the moving thing. It was a small metallic creature moving on four thin legs. A robot of some sort. It stood motionless for a couple of seconds, then turned away and droned off to a long desk cluttered with various bottles and other things. Disregarding its surroundings, it started sorting through them as if nothing had ever happened.

He had used up most of his strength in order to dispose of the woman, and it took him a few minutes to get to his feet. After taking a few steps forward, he collapsed. The robot turned to him to observe him with a lens-like eye before it turned back to its bottles. He crawled to what he had thought was a door, but instead appeared to be a wide arc inside of which there was a black cube. He looked around again. 

This was obviously some kind of a research facility, various pipes crisscrossing the room and its walls, long desks abundant in varicolored bottles and containers. There were a few glassy structures filled with some kind of greenish liquid. He finally spotted what seemed to be the door. He half-staggered and half-crawled to it. It appeared to be locked, the intricate lock demanding his fingerprints. He gathered his remaining strength and crawled back to the woman’s body. She was still there, under a narrow metallic table that he had found himself on when he came to. Her body was twitching now. Wondering how that could be, he grabbed the woman by her wrist and started dragging her body towards the door. He pressed her convulsing hand to the lock and the door slid open. Momentarily, he was blinded by the light. Blinking, he stayed still until his eyesight adapted. Leaving the twitching woman behind, he crawled into the light.

ooOoOoOoo

At the sound of the alarm, Ichigo raised his head to look at the white Seireitei towers, wondering what had happened. A chuckle bubbled in his throat as he remembered the latest cause for alarm – Renji, Rangiku and Yoruichi had been drinking and it came to the point where the women had challenged Renji to sound the alarm. The numbskull that he was, he had agreed. Byakuya had been livid to discover his lieutenant’s prank. Renji was probably still not allowed to go anywhere outside Seireitei.

Almost two years ago, after Sosuke Aizen had been captured and sentenced to lengthy years of imprisonment, Soul Society became relatively peaceful. There were still regular hollow attacks but it was nothing similar to what it had been in recent years. And now, Ichigo was certain that the alarm was just someone’s way of telling that they wanted a bottle of sake or maybe was missing their family.

Huffing, he lowered his head and weighed the plastic bag in his hand before opening it to take a better look inside. He had promised Ikkaku not to look at the contents, but Ikkaku had no business in sending him on various errands either, so they were even. After seeing five bottles of sake and a large roll of brightly colored fabric, Ichigo closed the bag, not the least bit surprised. This was a thank-you-gift of sorts. It was rather strange that Ikkaku didn’t deliver it to Shunsui personally. Wondering what it was about, Ichigo continued walking down the walled street towards the Eighth Division.

Ichigo rounded a corner and suddenly halted in his path. In shock, he nearly dropped the bag he was carrying. Stupefied, he stared at the pale figure in front of him. 

“Ulquiorra?”

The Arrancar’s incredibly green eyes blinked at him slowly. A spark of recognition lit in their depth. Ichigo watched Ulquiorra sway lightly and lean against the wall for support. The Arrancar looked frail, ribs and veins showing clearly from under the alabaster white skin. There were traces of dried blood on his body. What struck Ichigo as the oddest about the other male was that he was wearing a Shinigami’s robe. It was way too big for the Arrancar, hanging loosely on his thin frame. He didn’t have his Zanpakuto either.

The alarm was still going off, the sound echoing all around Seireitei and Ichigo realized that the reason for it stood in front of him. A commotion started somewhere farther away, shouts and the running of feet heard. Questions piled up in heaps, but Ichigo didn’t think he had enough time to ask them. Ulquiorra turned his head and looked back at the road he had just come from. Then the Arrancar’s emerald eyes concentrated on the younger man again. 

Ichigo saw Ulquiorra raise his hand toward him. It was clearly a hand that was asking for help, but the words that followed the gesture didn’t belong there.

“Kill me.”

The sounds of running feet and shouts were now coming closer. While Ichigo just stood there, caught in some sort of déjà vu, Ulquiorra lowered his hand and, holding onto the wall, moved forward. He could hardly keep himself upright. Entranced, Ichigo watched his slow-paced journey along the wall. Only now did he notice that the other man was barefooted. The Arrancar passed Ichigo, turning into the street the younger man had appeared from.

“I’ve killed you before,” Ichigo said, following him. “It doesn’t seem like I was very successful. What makes you think I’ll do any better now?”

Ulquiorra didn’t answer, didn’t turn around, just continued to move along the wall. Lost, Ichigo shook his head. He didn’t understand what was going on at all. The Arrancar swayed dangerously and dropped to his knees. Ichigo stopped a little bit farther behind him. The older male turned his head to him, his green eyes staring blankly at him. He had seen that look before.

Mentally cursing and berating himself, Ichigo stepped closer and held out his hand. He was probably at risk of getting it cut or chewed off or stabbed, but there was something in Ulquiorra’s demeanor telling him that the other man would not attack him. He could remember that Ulquiorra, like all higher class Espada, had hardly ever been aggressive. They usually attacked only when provoked, or when following Aizen’s orders. Since Aizen was no longer in control... And then, at the end of their battle, even if mortally wounded, Ulquiorra had also protected Uryu from him. If not for him, Ishida would no longer be alive.

Ulquiorra had a resignedly questioning look on his face when he took Ichigo’s hand. The red-haired youth started pulling him to his feet then started as the Arrancar slumped into a boneless heap at the end of his sandals. The running feet were almost here now and, coming to a quick decision, Ichigo wasted no time. He gathered the listless body into his arms and flash-stepped down the road. Once the clamor was out of earshot, he jumped onto the wall and continued to flash-step to the west, in the direction of the White Road Gate. The only place he could think of taking the Arrancar was the basement under Kuukaku Shiba’s house. Ichigo wasn’t certain he would be able to remember the way, though. It had been a long time since he had stayed there while training to create a spirit sphere that would allow them to break through the Seireitei’s protective barrier. He would have preferred Yoruichi and Kisuke’s hideout under Sokyoku Hill, yet that was the first place where they would come looking for Ulquiorra. 

From afar, he could see that the west gate was open, Jidanbo juggling his axes next to it idly. He had not yet received the orders to shut off the gate. It was an unbelievable stroke of luck and Ichigo flash-stepped past the gate and its keeper without reducing his speed. He doubted Jidanbo had even noticed him. Rushing further down the streets and roofs of Rukongai, he tried to be unnoticeable and stay in the shadows.

When he left the town premises, he had to change his course a few times until he finally found the right path. Even then, he had not been certain he would arrive at the correct destination. He finally reached the place about thirty minutes later. Ichigo doubted he had ever been using flash-step for such a long time before. He didn’t feel tired at all, though. Despite his worries, Ulquiorra hardly weighed anything. He thought that his sisters were probably heavier than the Arrancar and it was disquieting. Ulquiorra had not regained his consciousness either. 

The house was no longer there, of course. They had left it in shambles when the cannon shot them out towards Seireitei. That and the fact that Kuukaku Shiba liked moving house meant that, during all these years, she had probably moved five times already. One could hardly see the ruins because of the tall grass. Ichigo carefully laid down the Arrancar onto the grass and looked around, his eyes scanning for the entrance to the basement. He finally spotted a pile of stones and rotting logs covering what seemed to be a trapdoor. It took him a few minutes to free it from all the debris. However, the door had no handle or a ring that he could grab onto and lift. After digging around and trying various things, he at last managed to hook his fingers under the planks and raise it. Huffing, he let the door drop and peered at the stairs that it revealed. 

It was completely dark inside. Another unpleasant thing that he had discovered after having walked inside was that it was damp and puddles had formed here and there. It was probably even worse when it rained. Still, this was some kind of a shelter. And after looking around in the basement, he found a way to lighten the place – attached to the walls there were six esoteric stones that started exuding yellow light as soon as they were touched. Once he was free to explore the large area, Ichigo found out that it wasn’t as damp further in the basement. He had also found various rags and clothes that had been left behind. He even discovered five torn mattresses. It was very likely that one of them had been used by himself when he had stayed here previously.

Content with his discoveries, Ichigo started climbing up the stairs. When his head and shoulders appeared from the trapdoor, his step faltered. His right foot hung in the air, never reaching the next stair. He stared at Ulquiorra, who was sitting amidst the tall grass, the plastic bag resting on his lap.

“Ah,” Ichigo mumbled at the sight. “I’m supposed to deliver it to Shunsui. I’ll have to eventually, or they’ll start looking for me.” 

The Arrancar didn’t say anything to that, continuing to stare at the younger man with his incredibly green eyes. Ulquiorra was gazing at his mouth, Ichigo realized. He stepped out onto the field and approached the Arrancar.

“Can you hear me?”

Ulquiorra’s eyebrows twitched at the way Ichigo’s lips elongated the words but he shook his head slowly. He couldn’t hear a thing.

“Can you talk?”

“Yes. I did speak to you earlier.”

Ichigo shrugged sheepishly. “Oh, right.” Then, trying to avoid sudden movements and attempting to appear nonthreatening, he sat down opposite the Arrancar. 

“How did you appear here?” He frowned when Ulquiorra looked around. “I don’t mean here. How come you’re alive at all?” 

The Arrancar’s eyes stared at Ichigo’s mouth for a few seconds then he shrugged. He pushed the bag off his lap and lay down on the grass. He looked exhausted beyond comprehension.

“Kill me?”

“Listen,” Ichigo snapped at him, “we’ve already gone through that. I’m not killing anyone here. Just tell me what’s going on.” 

Ulquiorra had his eyes closed and it was obvious he could neither hear nor understand him. Huffing in frustration, Ichigo grabbed the other man by his shoulders and effortlessly lifted him to his feet. Ulquiorra gave him a curious look. Did he expect Ichigo to comply with his request? This annoyed Ichigo even further. Throwing and securing the Arrancar’s left arm over his left shoulder, he started leading him towards the trapdoor.

“What are you doing?”

Ichigo turned his head to glare at the pale face. “Trying to save your sorry ass. I’m actually thinking that I’ll badly regret this.” 

It didn’t seem that Ulquiorra understood what he had said, but he didn’t ask Ichigo to repeat. While he was being led inside the basement, the Arrancar didn’t even attempt to resist, his light body mostly hanging onto Ichigo. He was trying to walk but, instead of taking steps, his feet dragged uselessly. 

“Who the hell did this to you?” Ichigo muttered softly even though he knew Ulquiorra couldn’t see his mouth from this angle. He doubted the Arrancar would answer anyway. There weren’t many creatures that could reduce Ulquiorra to this listless heap of skin and bones. 

Ichigo led the Arrancar to the very end of the basement, where he had prepared a makeshift bed from the mattresses. He had also dug out a small crate and put it near the bed. He thought it could serve as a table or a chair. True, it swayed a little but it was better than nothing. Ulquiorra’s head rolled to his shoulder, then backwards and Ichigo turned to the other man. Had he lost consciousness again? Carefully, he lowered the Arrancar onto the mattresses. Ulquiorra’s eyes opened again. The gaze was unfocused, though, he stared somewhere above Ichigo’s shoulder.

“What the hell are you grinning at?” Ichigo muttered. In fact, Ulquiorra’s inquisitive smile was so unnerving that he leaned away from the other man. He didn’t remember seeing Ulquiorra smile before. On the other hand, his memories of fighting the Arrancar were jumbled; so many things had happened back then. The grin… Right, Ulquiorra had hardly ever been aggressive and even saved Uryu. But then, he had always been detached and insusceptible to certain emotions. Possibly, that was the reason why he had been so curious about human reactions. He would even create scenarios to draw out various emotions and would just stand and watch from the sidelines while analyzing. Ichigo could remember how much he had hated Ulquiorra for not allowing him to rush to Orihime’s side and help her, forcing him to fight him, watching how her pain affected him. She had nearly died back then. Even now, the Arrancar probably saw him as some kind of a research subject. That, or maybe Ulquiorra was just delirious, dancing with unicorns in his hallucination, laughing happily. 

In any case, he needed someone to take a look at Ulquiorra. He also needed to find out what happened. And he also needed to deliver the bag to Shunsui.

ooOoOoOoo

It was ironic how he sought out Kisuke’s help despite having avoided using his hideout. Ichigo, however, had not been able to think of anyone else that could help Ulquiorra. The former captain had listened to him very intently. He had also told Ichigo that he was an idiot. Twice. Half an hour later, he had finally agreed to take a look at the Arrancar without reporting any of them.

Once they arrived at the basement, Ichigo showed Kisuke the trapdoor before going to draw some water from the well nearby. He was pulling the bucket up when his whole body tensed at the feel of a familiar energy shift. The usual strangely distorted sound followed and the earth shook when green light tore from underground. A Cero. Ichigo dropped the bucket and flash-stepped into the newly opened hole in the ground. The sudden change from the bright light outside made it seem dark in the basement. There was also dust filling the air and even more debris under his feet. Moving forward, Ichigo blinked his eyes repeatedly. He could only see Ulquiorra’s shape at the back wall. He grabbed the Arrancar by his raised hand and slammed him into the wall behind him.

“No! Hey!” Kisuke shouted, digging himself up from the nearest pile of wreckage. “It’s alright, alright! I just startled him. He was sleeping and…”

Ulquiorra’s wide eyes were staring at Ichigo in surprise, and Ichigo realized that the Arrancar didn’t quite understand why, when seemingly trying to save his life, Ichigo did not allow him to defend himself. 

“It’s a friend,” Ichigo said with a sigh to Ulquiorra. He let go of the older male but then had to grasp him quickly by his arms since he couldn’t keep his balance and just slumped against the wall. “Ugh, sorry.” 

The Arrancar was giving him a dazed look. “A friend? Utter drivel. He’s the former captain of the Twelfth Division.”

Ichigo had to agree that Ulquiorra was making sense, especially now that Ichigo knew where he had escaped from. “He’s fine, really. He’ll help you. If you’re nice to him, that is.” 

The Arrancar was staring at Ichigo’s mouth for some time, then just gave up and blinked at him sleepily. Ichigo helped him lie back down onto the mattresses. 

“He’s fine. He’ll help you,” Ichigo repeated, trying to make the other man cooperate. Even though he doubted that in his state Ulquiorra was capable of causing any serious damage to Kisuke with his Cero, the Arrancar could still be full of unpleasant surprises. He turned to Kisuke, who was keeping his distance from them. 

Kisuke shrugged. “You can try knocking him out,” he suggested, grinning.

Ichigo sighed and turned back to the Arrancar. Ulquiorra was watching him from under half-closed lids. He was forcing himself to stay awake but was almost sleeping anyway.

“He is a friend,” Ichigo repeated sternly, accentuating every word.

Ulquiorra rolled his eyes. “Utter drivel.”

“He’s quite stubborn,” Kisuke noted. “Well, doesn’t matter. Are there any external wounds on his body?”

“Not that I’ve noticed,” Ichigo said. “The skin’s unbroken under those dried blotches of blood. That’s to be expected with his speedy regeneration, though.”

“Check him for sure.”

“Any wounds?” Ichigo asked Ulquiorra, trying to illustrate on his own body. The Arrancar shrugged and, slowly, Ichigo reached out for his robe. 

Amazed, Kisuke watched Ichigo unfold the robes without even a word of protest from Ulquiorra. The Arrancar was completely naked under the robes. There were no visible wounds indeed, just smudges of dried blood like on his upper body. The fact of extreme malnutrition was glaringly obvious, too. Ichigo nudged him to make him turn on his side but there were no wounds in his back either.

When Ichigo covered the Arrancar in his robes again, he fell asleep. So as not to disturb his rest, Kisuke motioned for Ichigo to follow him outside. 

“Well?” Ichigo inquired when they were back in the meadow. The setting sun was dyeing everything in yellowish colors and the air was becoming cool and damp.

“That Mayuri sure did a number on him,” the former captain said with a soft whistle. “I’m surprised he managed to escape in the state he’s in.”

“Yeah, but what’s actually wrong with him?”

“Well, first, it’s obvious he’s malnourished. I think he will regain most of his strength as soon as he starts eating. But yes, you’re right, there’s something definitely wrong with him; he can use his Cero but he can’t even keep himself upright. Well, there are no outside wounds but I can’t say anything about his internal organs. And there’s also the problem with his hearing...”

Ichigo was looking at him expectantly but Kisuke only shrugged. “If we want to know more, I need to take him to the Human World for further examination.”

Ichigo put his hands up in protest. “Hey, hey, are you sure? We are talking number four Espada here! Actually, I don’t think number four is even accurate.”

Crossing his hands and putting them on the hilt of his Zanpakuto/cane, Kisuke huffed. “Really, Ichigo, why did you even save him if you want to drop him half-way?”

Ichigo turned to look in the direction of the basement. Mostly it had been the knowledge that, if apprehended by other Shinigami, Ulquiorra would kill; there was no need for unnecessary victims. Then there was also the sympathy and all other things he had been thinking at the time. He still wasn’t sure he had made the right decision.

When he had carried the bag to Shunsui, he listened and asked around. The only thing that was clear was that a dangerous subject had escaped the 12th Division premises. It was also said that it had attempted to kill Nemu. Ichigo hadn’t had enough time to check on the lieutenant, but he was certain that the robot was as good as new.

From all this, it was easy to surmise that Mayuri Kurotsuchi had been keeping Ulquiorra captive. How long and why he had been locked up, or how he appeared in Soul Society at all were the questions only the involved parties held answers to.

“Don’t worry,” Kisuke reassured Ichigo, “it’s completely safe.”

Staring at the hole in the ground blown out by a Cero, Ichigo raised his eyebrows. Kisuke was such a liar.

TBC


	2. Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach – it belongs to its respective owners. This fan fiction is not a commercial project, and I am not making any money from writing it.  
> Warnings:  
> 1\. Yaoi (male x male). Ulquiorra x Ichigo and vice versa. Other pairings?  
> 2\. Ichigo – almost 19 years old; Ulquiorra – probably a few hundred as a Hollow and about a decade or so as an Arrancar?  
> 3\. Post anime (haven’t read the manga).  
> 4\. Alternate Universe.  
> 5\. I’m not a native speaker, thus expect various language oddities.  
> 6\. I’m not very familiar with all the details in the anime, and I am also new to Bleach fandom, so I will be straying away from the canon quite frequently. I do my research but Bleach is a vast universe that is not so easy to grasp. I must admit, though, that there are also things in the anime that don’t make sense to me and I take the liberty of recreating certain parts of this universe as I see fit.  
> 

**The Heart in My Hand**

by chayron (lttomb@yahoo.com), beta-read by Ash and Athena

Part 2

Ichigo couldn’t believe he was going through the Dangai for the third time today. He had actually gotten good at handling it, though. That is, if one ignored his torn clothing and bleeding right shoulder. They should issue him one of those Hell Butterflies so that he could move freely between the Human World and Soul Society – after all, he was almost a full-fledged Shinigami. On the other hand, this was probably why they didn’t – here he was lugging around probably the most powerful Arrancar there was. Ahh… He didn’t even want to think what would happen if someone got wind of this. His days as a Shinigami Substitute would be over. But really, he didn’t want to think about it.

Ichigo glared at Kisuke’s back. Ahead of him, the man was running through the dark tunnel swiftly, effortlessly avoiding traps in his way. It was easy for him to do so since he wasn’t carrying Ulquiorra, who would give Ichigo a mean look every time he was given a jolt when the younger man had to jump sideways or forward. Ichigo thought that it wouldn’t have been so bad if Ulquiorra had stayed unconscious or, at least, asleep.

When they jumped out of the Dangai and into the Human World, it was a moonless night. Karakura Town was already asleep. Ichigo guessed that it was past midnight, maybe one or two o’clock in the morning.

“I know you’re only doing this because you’re curious about what Mayuri was up to,” Ichigo said when they finally entered Urahara Shop.

Kisuke stopped in the doorway and turned around. “Oh, my. I’ve been found out,” he chuckled, covering his mouth with his white fan.

“Wasn’t that hard,” Ichigo grunted out. “And you can stop playing innocent with that fan of yours, it’s pretty cold already.”

Kisuke closed the fan with a snap and moved forward through the door. “Aren’t we bitchy today?”

“I’ve been dragging him around for half a day. He’s not exactly weightless or entertaining. I’m entitled to be a little bitchy.”

“Well, I suppose,” Kisuke said, groping around the wall next to the door for a switch. The light hit their eyes, making them blink.

“Who’s there?”

Ichigo turned to see Jinta appear from the second floor. At the sight of Kisuke and Ichigo, he lowered his huge kanabo.

“Ah, it’s you,” he said, already turning around, climbing back up.

Ichigo watched Jinta disappear upstairs. Had he just ignored the Arrancar in his arms? Or was he half-asleep and hadn’t noticed? Slim chance.

Grabbing this and that into his hands on his way, Kisuke led Ichigo to the back of the shop. “Here, put him on the sofa until I get everything ready. There’s a medical kit over there,” he pointed. “Tend to your shoulder.”

Trying not to aggravate his body more than necessary, Ichigo lowered the Arrancar onto the sofa and saw Ulquiorra nod off almost as soon as he had been propped against the backrest. Ichigo grabbed the kit and sat down on the sofa next to the drowsing Arrancar. 

“Shouldn’t we feed him?” Ichigo asked, opening the kit and looking through its contents, “Didn’t you say that was the root of the problem?”

“Well, yeah,” Kisuke answered while brushing piles of paper off a strange device further in the room. “But not before I get him through this.”

Ichigo gave the apparatus a more attentive look. It was a large, oblong object, mostly metallic. There were rows of buttons on its left side and a large screen attached to it. He rather hoped it was a sophisticated mincing machine. That way his problems would be over, and after he was done with Ulquiorra, he could run Kisuke through it. Perfect.

Huffing, Ichigo ripped the rest of the sleeve above his right shoulder. The cut had already stopped bleeding; all that was left was to disinfect the sides of the wound and slap a strip of plaster on it. He was done at nearly the same time that Kisuke switched his device on. A humming sound filled the room.

“Put him here,” Kisuke said, pressing one of the buttons on the machine, making an oblong tray-like thing slide out from the inside of it. It rolled out on small wheels for about two meters before stopping.

A little unsure, Ichigo gave the sleeping Ulquiorra a look. There was no way around this, though, and, half-expecting another Cero to blow up in his face, he tapped the Arrancar on his shoulder. Confused bleary eyes blinked open to stare at him. Ichigo pointed at the device. Ulquiorra turned his head to follow his finger and a frown set on his face.

“What is that?”

Ichigo shrugged. “Honestly? I don’t know.”

“You’re supposed to convince him, not the opposite,” Kisuke pointed out. “Make him cooperate.”

“Well, what does it do?” Ichigo asked him.

“Hmm… Well, generally speaking, it will map out his internal body, making it easier to discern most problems.”

Ichigo turned back to Ulquiorra. For a moment, he was tempted to tell him that it was a mincing machine. He scolded himself mentally. He was definitely going to skip lectures tomorrow and catch some quality sleep instead.

“Umm…” Ichigo hummed, thinking how to rephrase Kisuke’s words in a more compact manner. Finally, he gave up, pointed at the apparatus again and offered Ulquiorra the brightest smile he was able to muster. “It’s safe.”

“Utter dri-”

“It is really, really safe,” Ichigo repeated, cutting the Arrancar off. He was grinning so brightly now that his cheeks were starting to hurt.

“Stop grinning,” Ulquiorra told him. “What does it do?”

Ichigo gave him a helpless look. Then an idea occurred to him, and he wondered why he hadn’t thought of it earlier. He shot off the sofa and grabbed one of the loose paper sheets off the floor. He dug around for a pen and finally found one near the door.

“Here,” he said, writing quickly. Ulquiorra’s green eyes were following the movement of his pen. Soon Ichigo was done and looked at the other man expectantly. He grew confused at the expression on Ulquiorra’s face. The Arrancar was turning his head this way and that, then finally took the paper and lifted it in front of him. Blinking, he lifted it higher, then almost above his head.

“I think there’s something off with his vision as well,” Kisuke finally said.

Ichigo lowered Ulquiorra’s hand with the paper to make him concentrate on his face again. “Can you understand it?”

“Yes, but it is all smudgy. Make bigger kanji next time.”

“Fine, now get over there,” Ichigo said, standing up. He held his hand out. Ulquiorra stared at it as if it were a snake, but took it. Ichigo helped him to the machine. He was about to lift the shorter man onto the tray-like thing when Kisuke cleared his throat.

“What now?” Ichigo asked.

“He needs to undress before climbing onto it.” 

Ichigo huffed. “Say these things in advance.” 

Kisuke made an abrupt motion with his hand to catch Ulquiorra’s attention. “It’ll take about ten minutes,” he said slowly, showing all ten fingers. The Arrancar offered him a mistrustful glare. Kisuke smiled politely; at least it appeared that Ulquiorra understood him.

To Ichigo’s relief, once informed, Ulquiorra offered no word of protest, letting the robe be undone then shrugging it off his shoulders. Ichigo gathered it in his left hand and passed on to Kisuke. Both of them already had the impression that the Arrancar wasn’t shy.

Once Ulquiorra was on the tray, it slid back into the apparatus. Kisuke pushed a few more buttons, making the machine whir more loudly and light up in a soft blue color. After he ascertained himself that everything was fully automatic, Kisuke turned to Ichigo, who was inspecting the machine.

“How come he trusts you so much?” he voiced the question that had been bothering him from the very beginning.

Ichigo averted his eyes from the softly vibrating machine to Kisuke. “Umm…” he hummed, scratching the back of his head sheepishly. “I wouldn’t exactly say that…”

Kisuke’s eyebrows rose at that and he grunted. “You told me that you were the one who killed him. Yet he does everything you tell him to. It doesn’t make any sense.”

Wondering how to explain it, Ichigo scratched his head again. Even though he had known in advance that Ulquiorra would not attack him, he didn’t quite understand himself.

“Well…” he started slowly, “during our last battle we reached some sort of conclusion, some sort of…understanding, camaraderie, maybe? Not exactly. I can’t really explain it. But he does understand that if I wanted him dead, he would be dead so...” not finishing, Ichigo shrugged.

Kisuke opened his fan and started fanning himself absentmindedly. He knew there was more to the story, but he wasn’t going to push it. Sooner or later, Ichigo or Ulquiorra would tell it all. It went both ways, though: Ulquiorra trusted Ichigo, but Ichigo trusted him, too. To a certain extent, of course. After all, Ulquiorra was still a Hollow.

“You do realize that once he’s recovered, he’ll be able to use Garganta at any time, right?” Kisuke asked.

“But isn’t that okay?”

“Well, yes, but Hueco Mundo is the first place where Mayuri will be looking for him.”

Ichigo thought for a moment. He nodded. “That’s true, but, you know, if he regains his strength… I think he’ll be more powerful than Mayuri, or any other captain for that matter.”

Kisuke’s eyes widened and he looked at Ichigo from above the fan in disbelief. “Are you serious?”

“Absolutely.”

Rubbing his chin with the fan, Kisuke turned to stare at the machine, the insides of which held the Arrancar. And yet here he was, malnourished, hardly walking, an easy target for anyone. Laughable. It had just been a sheer stroke of luck that he had met Kurosaki.

Five minutes later, when the machine had stopped humming, Kisuke rose from the sofa. Gathering the Shinigami robe in his hands with a soft sigh, Ichigo followed him to the apparatus. In a moment it opened to reveal a peacefully asleep Arrancar. Ichigo draped the robe over his pale body, starting him out of his sleep. 

“That’s all for today,” Kisuke said, pushing a few keys on the side of the machine, the screen blinking a few times. The slot underneath the screen started spewing out papers. He grabbed the two first, letting the rest of them pile up on the floor.

“I’ll analyze the data and will be able to tell more tomorrow,” he said, moving in the direction of the door.

Ichigo had helped Ulquiorra off and now was fixing the robe for him. Supporting the swaying Arrancar, he followed Kisuke out of the room and to the kitchen.

“I have to say, this is certainly interesting,” Kisuke muttered under his breath. He was half-examining one of the papers in his hand and half-searching for something in one of the cupboards. “Seriously, that Mayuri…” Finally retrieving a teacup from the cupboard, he started walking out and Ichigo followed him back into the room that contained the machine, which was still spewing out papers. Kisuke took a few more of them and marched into the living room. He was scrutinizing the documents before he realized that he had forgotten to put some water to boil and returned to the kitchen.

After having followed the man to and fro in the house, at some point, Ichigo found himself outside Urahara Shop, the door sliding shut right in front of his perplexed face, nearly taking his nose off. Ichigo stared at the door. He should have expected this. He turned his head to his right to meet Ulquiorra’s questioning eyes. They stared at each other then, in unison, turned their heads back to give the door accusing looks.

“You’ve got to be kidding me…” Ichigo groaned. “You expect me to keep him at my place? My dad will go mental! What about my sisters?”

The door opened a fraction. “Thank you for your patronage.” The door slid open a little bit more and a bundle appeared. “Feed him this. Not much at first. This should last for a few days. Drop by tomorrow in the afternoon.” With that, a hand lowered the bundle onto the ground. The door closed shut again and a ringing silence settled in. A few moments later, the light in the porch went out and they were left standing in the dark. Ichigo frowned. A dog howled somewhere in the distance.

Ichigo felt Ulquiorra shift, reaching out for the dark shape next to the door. Nearly falling over, he grasped the bundle by the ends of the tied rope above and lifted it.

“What is this?”

It was too dark for him to read Ichigo’s lips and the younger man didn’t even try explaining. Defeated, Ichigo turned away from the door. His arms were still numb from carrying Ulquiorra around all day but there was no way around this. He made sure that the Arrancar kept good hold on the bundle before he hefted him into his arms again and flash-stepped in the direction of his home.

The window of his room had been left open and Ichigo landed on the windowsill. He brushed the curtain aside and carefully climbed onto the bed. He was about to step down to the floor when something shifted under the covers and a horrendous screech filled the room.

“You’re stepping on me! That hurts! Ow, ow! Get off, get off!”

“Shhh, you moron!” Ichigo hissed. “Do you want to wake everyone up?” He jumped off the bed, landing on his feet as softly as possible. Still holding Ulquiorra by his shoulders, he lowered his feet to the ground. The Arrancar swayed, but managed to keep himself upright. The red-head moved towards the light switch.

“But it hurt! And why are you here? I didn’t expect you to be back till Saturday! And I’m going on a date with Orihime the day after tomorrow, so don’t you think you can just take your body back!”

Ichigo groaned. “Shut up for once. You can go on your stupid date, just shut up!”

Mistrustfully, Kon muttered something under his breath then his mood suddenly brightened at the feel of an unfamiliar energy. “You brought someone with you! Is she hot?”

“Yeah, totally,” Ichigo said, annoyed. He reached out to switch on the lights, “take a look.”

All of them blinked when the bright light hit their eyes. Still sitting in the bed, Kon rubbed at his eyes and took a very careful look at the person next to Ichigo. 

“Why’s there a horn on his head?” Kon asked, at the same time imitating the green lines under Ulquiorra’s eyes on his own cheeks. “The hell? Did you just bring an Arrancar here?”

“Yeah,” Ichigo confirmed with a nod. “It’s a long story,” he added when Kon gave him a look that was clearly indicating that the Modified Soul believed he had gone mad. “Don’t tell anyone about him.” He pointed at Kon. “This is Kon. And this is Ulquiorra.”

The Arrancar’s sleepy eyes set on Kon without much interest. “Is it a Modified Soul inside?”

Ichigo nodded. He motioned for Kon to get out of the bed. His body gave him a displeased look but climbed out of it. 

“He can’t hear anything,” Ichigo informed Kon, seating the Arrancar on the bed. “And, as you can see, isn’t in the best shape.”

“Ah, so you’re going to nurse him back to health so he can kill us all,” Kon summed up.

Ichigo felt a headache forming. “Can you leave it alone for now? I’m tired, I’m hungry, and I’m not in the mood to argue right now. I’ll explain everything tomorrow.”

Kon scowled, but stayed quiet. He watched Ichigo open the package that the Arrancar had been holding earlier. He saw the red-head give the contents a confused look, and, curious, he approached them. There was food inside: sandwiches, a few steaks, baked potatoes, and a bottle of water. Ichigo raised his head to stare at the quiet Arrancar and, even though it didn’t seem possible, appeared to be even more confused than before.

“How in the world is he supposed to eat any of this?” Ichigo muttered. “Won’t everything just fall out of the hole in his chest? Do we have any duct tape?”

Dumbstruck, Kon stared at him for a few seconds then his face turned into one huge grin. “Bottom drawer.” Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad after all! He watched Ichigo put the box on the desk and start rummaging through the lowest drawer. Meanwhile, the Arrancar’s eyes stayed glued to the box with food. Kon was waiting for him to attack it.

Nonplused, Ulquiorra blinked at the unrolled duct tape in Ichigo’s hands. “What are you going to do with that?”

Ichigo motioned at the hole in his chest, then at the box on the desk. Ulquiorra’s eyebrows rose.

“You haven’t met Hollows before?” he wondered.

“Well, of course I have! I’ve just never fed one.” Ichigo waved the tape in the air, eager to get the task done.

Ulquiorra wondered shortly whether he should tell Ichigo that he was being an idiot, but decided that both of them were too tired to care. The sooner they finished this, the sooner he could eat.

ooOoOoOoo 

Ichigo blinked at the sunlight coming through the gap between the curtains. With a sigh, he rolled to his side and fell asleep again.

He woke up again two hours later. A check on his wristwatch informed him that it was four in the afternoon. His eyes widening in alarm, he sat up in his futon, and cast a quick glance at the bed. It was empty. He was alone in his room, not even Kon present. He scanned the house for familiar energy sources and was quickly rewarded with Ulquiorra’s. 

Ichigo rolled out of the futon and dressed hurriedly. He jogged downstairs, where he checked the clinic and the study. Finding no one there, he proceeded to the kitchen. Ulquiorra was sitting at the table, facing the door. His eyes fixed on Ichigo as soon as he had entered. For a few seconds, Ichigo could only stare at him in astonishment. The Shinigami robe was gone, as was gone the duct tape from Ulquiorra’s chest. He was wearing his usual Arrancar clothes: a white jacket, black sash and a white hakama. Then Ichigo’s eyes traveled down, to the legs of the table where, against one of them, a greenish Zanpakuto was propped.

“You’re well,” Ichigo finally managed.

Ulquiorra turned his head a little, and Ichigo realized that he was still reading his lips.

“Yes, I am much better,” the Arrancar said. He watched the red-head walk into the kitchen. Ichigo appeared somewhat uncertain, cautious. “Does that surprise you?”

“A little,” Ichigo admitted. The box Kisuke had given them was on the table in front of Ulquiorra. It was almost empty, only one sandwich left. It didn’t look any worse than it had been when they got the box yesterday – it still seemed fresh.

Ulquiorra didn’t say anything to that, his incredibly green eyes studying Ichigo instead. The red-head shifted under his gaze and decided he wouldn’t mind a cup of tea. He went to check the kettle, poured some water into it and set it to boil. He opened the fridge to check the contents and found a wrapped up plate with a note from Yuzu. He pulled it out and set it to microwave.

“Where is everyone?” Ichigo asked, still mostly in the fridge, looking for more food. “Ah,” he said, remembering Ulquiorra couldn’t hear him. He pulled away from the fridge to look at the Arrancar. “Wh-” the rest of the words stuck in his throat as he found himself staring at the emerald eyes right in front of him. His hand was still raised in the air, frozen in an illustrating motion.

“So this is your Human body?” Ulquiorra drawled, his fingers touching Ichigo’s shoulder with interest.

“Where’s Kon?” Ichigo asked, his apprehension growing tenfold. Tentatively, he pushed at the Arrancar blocking his way, but the pale body didn’t even budge. He suddenly found himself effectively trapped between the sideboard and the wall. The kettle started whistling, a low keening sound filling the kitchen.

“You mean that annoying plushy thing?”

“What did you do to him?” Ichigo demanded, now shoving at the Arrancar’s chest forcefully to try and make him retreat. He grunted as his wrist was caught easily by a pale hand. The thin fingers around his wrist closed with crushing force. The red-head started at a loud ping emitted by the microwave, indicating that his food was done. He tried to free his hand but the Arrancar didn’t let go.

“I bet now you are regretting having returned to your body,” Ulquiorra remarked drily.

Frantically, Ichigo’s eyes scanned the kitchen, but he couldn’t see Kon anywhere. His Substitute Shinigami Badge was on the second floor. There was a knife rack on the cabinet next to him but it was absolutely useless against a Hollow. He struggled again, trying to free himself, kicked out but Ulquiorra didn’t even take heed of his attempts.

“Where are my sisters?” Ichigo hissed.

The Arrancar offered him an apathetic look. He lifted Ichigo’s arm, noting how the red-head’s eyes were growing wider in alarm. Then, with his left hand, Ichigo tried to pull out Ulquiorra’s Zanpakuto from under his sash. The younger man grunted in pain when Ulquiorra’s fingers closed around his other wrist. The Arrancar’s green eyes kept examining his face then he suddenly freed Ichigo’s hands and moved out of the way.

Massaging his reddened wrists, Ichigo watched the other man, not daring to move. Ulquiorra turned around and returned to sit at the table. He reached into the box to retrieve the last sandwich. As his heart hammered in his throat, Ichigo watched him eat. 

“It is made of spirit particles,” Ulquiorra said. “As soon as I swallow, it dissolves and is absorbed into my body. It is only similar to Human food in appearance. You worried needlessly.”

“Where’s Kon?”

“It was being very noisy, so I put it into the blue box in the bathroom.”

“My sisters?”

“Probably at school.”

Ichigo turned to the kettle, switched it off and finally ended the low complaining noise. Then he took out the plate from the microwave and lowered it on the cabinet. Half-expecting the Arrancar to appear next to him again, he turned around. His hands were still trembling lightly and he rested them on the sideboard top. He lowered his head and willed his shoulders to relax. He had been crazy to have brought the Arrancar home.

“Not eating?”

Ichigo raised his head to glare at him. “I’ve lost my appetite.”

Nothing changed on Ulquiorra’s face and Ichigo thought that he probably hadn’t understood him. Cursing under his breath, the red-head pushed away from the sideboard and went to the bathroom to search for Kon. At once, his attention was drawn to the blue laundry box in the corner. It was shaking and vibrating violently. Freeing the lid, Ichigo peeled the duct tape off and opened it. Kon shot out of it immediately. As soon as he landed on the tiles, one of his legs pointed at his mouth indignantly. Ichigo peeled the tape off his mouth and instantly regretted as curses and complaints filled the bathroom.

“Untie me!” Kon demanded, turning around, showing the red-head his tied paws. 

Ichigo removed the tape and reached out for the adornment on Kon’s head but the Modified Soul shot out of the bathroom and galloped toward the kitchen. Ichigo ran after him.

“How dare you do that to me!” Kon shouted at the Arrancar. “Do you even know how much Ichigo’s socks stink? And this body is so fragile!” He pointed his stuffed paw at an old patch on his chest. “It hurt like a bitch! Look at how you damaged the fabric! Where is this thread coming from? Look! The cotton is falling out!”

“You have women’s underwear on your head,” Ulquiorra informed him helpfully.

With an enraged roar, Kon charged at the Arrancar. Ichigo stepped forward, trying to catch him but the Modified Soul was already airborne. Then everything happened so fast that Ichigo froze on the spot: one moment Kon was flying at Ulquiorra then he was snatched out of the air and found himself sailing through the open kitchen window. Ulquiorra closed the window before Kon could hit the asphalt outside and returned to the table to finish his sandwich.

Ichigo heaved a groan of despair and went back to the bathroom to relieve himself of a few days’ worth stress. After that, he returned to the kitchen, made himself some tea, grabbed the now cold plate and, completely ignoring Kon’s threats and demands in the garden, seated himself in front of Ulquiorra.

TBC


	3. Part 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach – it belongs to its respective owners. This fan fiction is not a commercial project, and I am not making any money from writing it.  
> Warnings:  
> 1\. Yaoi (male x male). Ulquiorra x Ichigo and vice versa. Other pairings?  
> 2\. Ichigo – almost 19 years old; Ulquiorra – probably a few hundred as a Hollow and about a decade or so as an Arrancar?  
> 3\. Post anime (haven’t read the manga).  
> 4\. Alternate Universe.  
> 5\. I’m not a native speaker, thus expect various language oddities.  
> 6\. I’m not very familiar with all the details in the anime, and I am also new to Bleach fandom, so I will be straying away from the canon quite frequently. I do my research but Bleach is a vast universe that is not so easy to grasp. I must admit, though, that there are also things in the anime that don’t make sense to me and I take the liberty of recreating certain parts of this universe as I see fit.  
> 

**The Heart in My Hand**

by chayron (lttomb@yahoo.com), beta-read by Ash and Athena

Part 3

From across the table, Ulquiorra watched Ichigo eat his cold pancakes. He glanced at the box Urahara had given them, which was sitting on the table, but it was empty, not even a crumb left. He was still famished, though.

“Not getting out of your body?” Ulquiorra asked Ichigo casually.

Ichigo stopped chewing and looked up at Ulquiorra. “Should I?” he snorted while pointing at Ulquiorra with the pancake in his hand. “I don’t think you’ll like it when I do.”

Ulquiorra couldn’t understand everything the red-head had said. He, however, was good at interpreting. For some strange reason, he felt pleased by the threat. Amused, Ulquiorra tapped the side of the empty box.

“So what are you?” he demanded. “You are certainly a Human, but you are also a Vasto Lorde. That should be impossible.”

Looking at him, the red-head pursed his now greasy, glistening lips. It was only natural that Ulquiorra wanted to know, but this was a conversation he didn’t want to have. Not now at least.

“It’s a bit complicated. We can talk about it when you regain your hearing,” Ichigo said, pointing at his ears.

Ulquiorra looked around the kitchen, and Ichigo realized that he was searching for paper. Sipping his tea, the red-head watched him leave the kitchen. A few moments later, the Arrancar returned with a notebook and a pen that Ichigo recognized as his own. He lowered them on the table in front of Ichigo and demandingly pointed at the notebook.

“Tell me.”

Unhurriedly, almost demonstratively, Ichigo finished the last drops of his tea, lowered the cup, and took the pen in his hand. In fact, he had expected Ulquiorra to be more interested in knowing where Aizen was and what had happened to him. Unless he already knew. Ichigo stared at the blank paper then, with a resigned sigh, started writing. Seconds later he tore the page out and passed it to Ulquiorra.

“Human, Quincy, Shinigami, Fullbringer, Hollow,” the Arrancar read aloud. He looked at Ichigo. “Are you telling me to pick one?” He crumpled the paper in his fist, not in the mood for games. He was considering smacking that weak Human body of Ichigo’s around. 

Ichigo shook his head. He pointed at the paper then at himself. “All of that,” he said slowly. The red-head wasn’t certain he could still call himself a Fullbringer, but he felt he still retained a fraction of that power as well. That, without doubt, counted for something.

The Arrancar gave him a look of mixed astonishment and doubt. “Aren’t you a handful?” he finally said.

“Tell me about it,” Ichigo muttered, rolling his eyes. He could see that, even if skeptical, Ulquiorra did believe him – there was no reason for him to lie. 

“Will you tell me how this is possible?” the Arrancar asked.

“Maybe later,” Ichigo said. He wasn’t particularly interested in sharing that kind of personal information with an Arrancar he barely knew, someone who was a potential enemy.

Ulquiorra didn’t understand his answer and Ichigo wrote this down on the notebook. Ulquiorra read the words, wanted to ask how much “later”, but then decided that he wouldn’t get a clear answer anyway and conceded to not voicing his question.

“What happened to Aizen? Did you kill him?” 

Ah, so he didn’t know after all. Ichigo shook his head. “No. I didn’t actually manage to do anything to him.” With a sigh, he took the notebook and started writing down the whole story, starting with Aizen absorbing the Hogyoku, and finishing with his extremely long imprisonment sentence. He wasn’t certain it was very wise to do so, but sooner or later Ulquiorra would find out on his own. He wanted to see the Arrancar’s reaction to the information.

“What will you do now?” Ichigo asked when Ulquiorra just sat quietly, absorbing the words he had just finished reading. Ichigo couldn’t understand whether he was sad, disappointed, or apathetic. The Arrancar had a thoughtful look on his face.

Ulquiorra regarded him with his green eyes. At first, it didn’t seem that he understood what Ichigo had said but then the red-head saw him shake his head lightly.

“You want to know whether or not I will attempt to free him?”

“I really doubt you’d be able to do that, but yes,” Ichigo said, nodding. “I want to know if you’d do it if the opportunity arose.” The Arrancar was giving him a confused look and Ichigo groaned mentally. He reached out for the notebook. 

“I will not,” Ulquiorra said, passing him the notebook. “I consider my debt paid. None of that concerns me anymore.”

Ichigo tapped the notebook with the pen and began twirling it around in his fingers. He wondered if that was true. Ulquiorra did die following Aizen’s orders, paid whatever debt he was talking about with his life and one would consider that part of his existence over. Was it really that way, though? He doubted it. He had the impression that Ulquiorra was more loyal to Aizen than that.

“What about Gin?”

For not being concerned about it anymore, Ulquiorra was asking quite a lot of questions. Ichigo sighed again and started scribbling in the notebook.

“That was foolish,” the Arrancar commented after he had read Ichigo’s story. “Why did he wait for Aizen to absorb the Hogyoku?”

Ichigo shrugged. He had asked himself the same question and hadn’t been able to come up with an answer. “He must have had his reasons,” he said. He noticed that the news of Gin’s death disappointed Ulquiorra, and, to his surprise, Ichigo realized that the Arrancar must have liked the former captain. Maybe it hadn’t exactly been that, maybe he had just piqued Ulquiorra’s curiosity, but it was still surprising.

“What are you going to do with me?”

The red-head shrugged again. He didn’t know. He was already going against Soul Society by hiding someone who was considered a dangerous fugitive. In addition, Ulquiorra had aided Aizen in his destructive plans. “I suppose it depends on what your intentions are,” he finally said. He wrote this down and showed it to Ulquiorra.

“I want to return to Hueco Mundo.”

Ichigo scratched the back of his head in frustration. “You can’t do that. Mayuri is probably already looking for you there; you’ll be caught in no time. Besides, you need to regain your strength first.”

Ulquiorra did know that. “I…”

Voices wafted from outside the house and Ichigo turned to the window, Ulquiorra following his gaze. In a few moments, Ichigo heard a key turn in the lock and the sound of his sisters’ laughter became much stronger.

“They’re back,” Ichigo said. He glared at Ulquiorra, who was giving him an amused look.

“Were you still thinking I did something to them?” the Arrancar wondered. “They are just children. Humans.”

“Trash by your standards, you mean?” Ichigo grunted, irritated.

Ulquiorra didn’t understand but he wasn’t in the mood to explain. He wondered frantically if he should tell the Arrancar to go and hide in his room. How long could he hide Ulquiorra, though? A week? Two? In any case, it would be impossible for him to stay unnoticed forever. 

Ichigo was still half-way decided when his sisters entered the kitchen. Ichigo’s body twitching with apprehension; he waited for their reaction.

“Good afternoon,” Yuzu greeted loudly while heading to the fridge. She was carrying a heavy shopping bag.

“Hi,” Ichigo muttered.

Ulquiorra was quiet for a few seconds then nodded in answer.

“He can’t hear you even if you yell,” Karin said, following her sister with two more bags in her hands. “Just make sure he can see your mouth.” She turned to Ulquiorra and, motioning at him with her hand, asked, “How are you? You look much better already.”

The Arrancar nodded. “I feel much better.”

Ichigo looked from one to the other. “I gather you’ve met each other already?”

“What are you talking about?” Karin snorted. “Of course we have. We had breakfast together.”

“Oooh?” Ichigo drawled, glad that he had already finished his tea or he’d have choked on it. “Was dad there, too?”

“No, he wasn’t. He’s left for that seminar he’s been talking about for ages.”

“Oh, right, I forgot. When is he co-?” The end of Ichigo’s question was cut off as Kon suddenly tore through the kitchen. His sisters must have forgotten to lock the door.

“How dare you!” Kon spat, rushing straight towards Ulquiorra.

After turning to the Arrancar, Ichigo realized that Ulquiorra looked quite annoyed. It was very likely that he was contemplating launching a Cero at the Modified Soul. Ichigo raised his hands in an attempt to calm everyone down. 

“Now, this is not how…”

“Are those my panties on your head?”

The voice was low and beyond dangerous. Ichigo turned to Karin. He saw her grab a frying pan right off the stove. He considered stopping her, but only considered. She was his little sister, and it was her panties on Kon’s head. At the moment, she could tear him to pieces for all he cared.

“Wait!” Kon shouted. “Wait, wait! This is not what it looks like. They just slipped onto my head accidentally. I swear!”

“Yeah, sure! They climbed there on their own, you pervert!”

With an outraged cry, Karin charged at Kon, who was still groping around his head, trying to pull off the panties. They didn’t even budge, he only managing to shoot himself in the eye with the waistband. Howling in pain, he scurried out of the kitchen, Karin following close behind. A series of crashes, thumps, and bumps followed.

“It is very lively here,” Ulquiorra noted at the vibrations of something shattering in the corridor.

“We should get a cat,” Yuzu said while filling the fridge. “I’ve always wanted a cat. They’re much quieter.”

ooOoOoOoo

It was Kisuke who opened the door for them and Ichigo noticed his eyes widen at the sight of Ulquiorra.

“Yeah, I know,” the red-head said, pushing the empty food box into the former captain’s hands.

Kisuke moved aside, letting them pass. His eyes followed the Arrancar, who nodded to acknowledge him but otherwise seemed apathetic. He could hardly believe that the Arrancar already had enough power to summon his casual clothes and even had some residual energy to store it in his Zanpakuto. Despite the fact that he had probably never done this before, it seemed that it came naturally to him.

Once inside, Ichigo and Ulquiorra followed Kisuke to the living room. They stopped at the doorway, not certain how to proceed.

“Ah, sorry about the mess,” Kisuke said, kicking some of the papers out of their way. 

Following a narrow path among various documents and drawings, they finally reached the table. Motioning for them to sit down, with a promise for tea, Kisuke turned around intending to head to the kitchen.

“Hey,” Ichigo called to Ulquiorra, who, his hands in his pockets, started walking towards the opposite door. “Where are you going? Hey!” He started getting up, about to catch Ulquiorra by the sleeve. Kisuke’s hand, however, landed on his first, preventing the red-head from standing up.

“He can’t hear you. Let him look around – it’s a new territory for him.”

Ichigo snorted. “What is he? A dog?”

Kisuke chuckled. Then he noticed the red marks on Ichigo’s wrists and his eyes turned hard. “Did he try something?”

Noticing what had made the former captain’s voice sound so low and dangerous, Ichigo shook his head and folded his hands under the table, out of Kisuke’s sight. “No, he was just curious about how strong my real body is. I don’t think he expected it to be so weak.”

“Why are you in your body at all? Do you really trust him so much?”

That was more of a statement than a question but Ichigo found that he could neither deny nor confirm it. “I can’t really say,” he admitted. “Well, I’m more inclined to trust him, but… Currently I’m making a point. He can be quite difficult.”

“Making what point?” the former captain wondered. “By doing what?”

“By staying in my body.”

For a moment, Kisuke looked very amused. Then his usual fan appeared in his hand and he started fanning himself absently. In his opinion, Ichigo was looking for certain death rather than making a point. Surprisingly, this kind of thinking had always worked out in Ichigo’s favor. 

Kisuke decided to use Ulquiorra’s absence and sat down next to the red-head. “There’s this thing,” he started. “He belonged to the Espada. You said he was number four, right? All of them had their number tattooed on some part of their body.”

“Well, yeah.”

“He doesn’t have one.”

Ichigo stared at him. How could he have missed that? He had seen the Arrancar naked twice and hadn’t noticed anything odd about him but now when he thought about it, he really hadn’t seen the number.

“You said you saw him die. And it’s not possible to resurrect a Hollow or Shinigami after their death. He’s probably a clone, Ichigo.”

“A clone?” Ichigo repeated numbly. “But he remembers everything… And he… Are you sure?”

“Memory works a little differently with Hollows and actually even most Pluses. It’s their entire body that can collect memories. The sense of touch, temperature, likes, dislikes, sadness, sorrow, longing, and so on. They don’t need a brain to store that.”

Ichigo shook his head. “He remembers much more than that.”

“Does he?”

“Yes.”

“Interesting,” Kisuke mused.

“Does he know?” Ichigo asked. “Does he actually realize that he’s a clone?”

The former captain shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe, maybe not. Depends on how Mayuri has gone about it and what has actually been done to him.”

Thinking, Ichigo put his hands back on the table. He tapped his fingers on the smooth wooden surface. “Should we actually tell him if he doesn’t know?”

“Not all at once,” Kisuke said. “And I don’t know that for a fact. He needs to recover first. This kind of information can make anyone unstable. Let him get used to his surroundings as well.”

Ichigo rolled his eyes. “He’s getting used to them alright,” he said, pointing in the direction the Arrancar had wandered off. The red-head doubted the news would have a big impact on Ulquiorra, though. The Arrancar didn’t seem to be bothered by these kinds of things and, since he wasn’t able to do anything about it, he would just accept it. At least, that was what Ichigo believed.

“Concerning…”

Both of them started at a sudden scream. It came again at once and their eyes shot to the ceiling where the cry had travelled from. The red-head grabbed his Substitute Shinigami Badge and was soon jumping through the door, his listless body folding over onto the ground behind him. A loud crash came from above, followed by a few more screams.

He flew up the stairs and jumped in the middle of what seemed to be a fight further down the corridor. He was just in time to block Jinta’s kanabo before it could flatten Ulquiorra to the wall for the second time. Shoving the Arrancar behind his back, he pushed the kanabo away with his Zanpakuto.

“What happened?” Kisuke asked, just a few steps behind Ichigo, his hand ready on the hilt of Benihime. The scene in front of him was quite confusing: Ururu was half-naked, wrapped in a towel, her hair dripping wet; Jinta was beside himself with fury, still struggling against Ichigo’s Zanpakuto; Ulquiorra seemed to be dazed and was having a hard time maintaining his energy level – his clothes were flickering and his Zanpakuto was already gone.

“Let me at him!” Jinta hissed, trying to push Ichigo out of his way.

“I was having a shower and he suddenly…” Ururu started explaining.

Ichigo groaned in disbelief. “For gods’ sakes…. Didn’t you knock?” Remembering that Ulquiorra wasn’t able to hear him, he turned his head. Then he realized the absurdity of his question and closed his mouth. He turned back to Ururu. “He can’t hear anything. Even if you told him not to enter, he wouldn’t have heard it.”

“You just let me at him!” Jinta growled, swinging his kanabo again. “Hearing will be the least of his problems!”

Kisuke walked over to the bathroom and took a closer look at the door. “He tore the hook off. Seems Arrancars are quite the voyeurs…” he said with a grin, his hand letting go of Benihime and searching for his fan instead. He doubted Ulquiorra had even noticed the hook, and if he had, he probably pushed harder just to see what was behind it that needed locking. He averted his gaze to the Arrancar behind Ichigo’s back. Ulquiorra was leaning against the wall, giving Ichigo’s back an angry look. 

“So I found a bathroom,” the Arrancar stated, half-amused and half-annoyed.

Ichigo didn’t turn around, just nodded. 

“Well done,” Kisuke complimented him with a grin. He grinned brighter when Ulquiorra glowered at him. 

Past Ichigo’s shoulder, Ulquiorra looked at Jinta. He had hardly entered the bathroom before he had been grabbed and flung out of it, then that enormous kanabo smashed into him. He could have tried to defend himself, but this was not the first time he had seen the boy. Ichigo’s and Urahara’s reactions to him attacking Jinta were easy to predict. He would have been dead already. And he didn’t exactly want to be dead anymore.

“Jinta, move your kanabo away. Ururu, go and dress,” Kisuke said. The soft tapping of bare feet against the wooden floor that immediately followed his orders somehow sounded soothing to his ears. Then he turned to Jinta. “Well?”

With a displeased grunt, Jinta lowered his kanabo. “I still don’t like him!” he snapped.

“Jinta, he’s a Hollow – nobody likes him,” Kisuke comforted him. He chuckled at the look Ichigo gave him. “Except for Ichigo,” he corrected himself. “Ichigo likes troublesome characters, right?” He opened his mouth again, intending to tease the red-head more, but the chime on the front door indicated that someone had just entered the shop. Kisuke turned to Jinta and motioned with his head towards the stairs. “Take care of them.”

“Yeah,” Jinta said, turning to the stairs.

“Umm… Leave that here,” Kisuke said when Jinta weighed his enormous kanabo in his hand and propped it against his shoulder. “Don’t scare the customers off.”

With a loud clang, Jinta dropped his weapon and started descending the stairs. Kisuke turned to look at the hole in the wall: he could see Jinta’s bed right through it. This was going to take time to fix. He sighed then turned to Ichigo and Ulquiorra. Ichigo had finally sheathed his Zanpakuto as well. Ulquiorra didn’t seem to be well, and, not certain what to do, the red-head was giving the Arrancar a questioning look. The Arrancar’s clothes had stopped flickering, though, and had acquired a more tangible look to them again. There was an aura of chaffed and splintered plaster around Ulquiorra’s form. Some of the plaster had fallen off. Ulquiorra moved away from the wall, and there was a sudden rain of white plaster. Kisuke had to resist an urge to groan: there were bare planks behind the Arrancar.

“I can’t believe you broke into the bathroom while she was having a shower,” Ichigo muttered. “I thought that only happened in comedies.” 

“Or horror movies,” Kisuke pointed out. “Or porn, maybe?”

Ichigo snickered. “What kind of porn have you been watching? No, stop, don’t tell me. That was a rhetorical question.”

Ulquiorra was still leaning against the wall, gathering his strength, when Ururu appeared from her room. 

“Could you make us some tea, please?” Kisuke asked her. “We’ll be in the living room shortly.”

“Of course,” she said with a nod.

When they finally descended downstairs, with Ichigo supporting the Arrancar, the tea was already done, waiting for them on the table. At once, Ichigo returned into his sprawled body, arranged his limbs into a more natural position and poured himself a cup. Ulquiorra watched him with interest and a sort of uncertain amusement on his face, and then turned to look at the teapot. It didn’t interest him much and he turned away without touching it. He took a few documents off the floor and started reading.

From across the table, Kisuke watched the two thoughtfully. Whatever had happened between the two and whatever statement Ichigo had been talking about, this was taking it too far. Ichigo had to be more careful around the Arrancar; staying in his body all the time was just asking for trouble. 

“So he only got better outwardly,” Ichigo summed up the latest experience. “His power is still nowhere near what it was before.” Still, it had been enough to scare him back in the kitchen. Ichigo grunted and took a sip of his hot tea.

“Keeping in mind what has been done to him, he’s recovering at a stunning speed,” Kisuke said, pouring himself a cup as well. “I just have one question – where’s the Shinigami robe he was wearing before?”

“Huh? He put it in the laundry box. Why? Is it important?”

“Laundry box? Really? It’s not his?”

Ichigo gave Kisuke a confused look. “Of course not. He obviously stole it from someone. I mean, it can’t be his. He’s… Can it?”

“Well, next time you come over, bring it with you.”

Ichigo nodded. He felt a stare and turned his head to see Ulquiorra giving him an accusing look. The Arrancar couldn’t follow the conversation and was displeased. There wasn’t much Ichigo could do for him, though.

“Umm… The Shinigami robe,” Ichigo asked him. “Is it yours?” Ulquiorra stared at his mouth and Ichigo wasn’t certain whether it was because he couldn’t understand or could but just couldn’t believe that he had just been asked that. The red-head felt stupid for even considering that.

“What?”

“Ugh… Give me something to write on,” Ichigo asked Kisuke.

“Of course it is not,” Ulquiorra denied as soon as he had read the words. “How did you even come up with the idea? I am not a Shinigami.”

Ichigo turned to Kisuke. “See? Not his. And yeah, how did you even come up with the idea?”

“Well, I’ve received quite interesting results,” Kisuke said with a motion at the wall; behind it was the apparatus they had run Ulquiorra through. “But if it’s not his, then it doesn’t matter. So did you find out anything from him?”

“It went the other way actually,” Ichigo admitted, embarrassed. “It was me answering questions.” 

When Ichigo was summing up his and Ulquiorra’s conversation in the kitchen, he was interrupted by a knock on the door and Ururu appeared with a tray. She walked to the table, set down two plates with cookies and a cake, then two smaller ones. Ichigo thanked her and grabbed a cookie. It was fresh, crispy and smelled wonderful, as always. He loved Ururu’s homemade cookies and cake.

“And what about you?” Ichigo asked when Ururu excused herself and left. He hummed around the cookie in pleasure. “Any interesting discoveries?”

“From what I’ve seen,” Kisuke said, “Mayuri was mostly interested in his unique regeneration ability. Not many Hollows have it, and that of an Arrancar must be extraordinary. It actually is. It’s amazing.”

“Really?” Ichigo wondered. “Well, yeah, I’ve seen him regenerate limbs in no time.” He flinched. “Ugh, that’s where that blood on his body came from?”

For a moment, Kisuke wondered how much Ichigo really wanted to know. Then he decided that the red-head could handle it. “Yes, mostly,” he agreed. “And small parts of his internal organs are missing. The problem with his hearing and eyesight is due to Mayuri having cut off the nerves leading to his eyes and ears. It was either done with the purpose of the research or just to keep his senses dulled, or maybe both. There might have been more done to him but by this time his body has mostly healed already, so I wouldn’t know. And…” he fell silent when Ichigo looked as if he would throw up at any moment. The half-eaten cookie was suspended in the air in front of Ichigo’s mouth. 

“Don’t worry, he’s mostly fine already,” Kisuke said. “In a few days, a week at most, he should also be able to hear. For the most part, his eyesight is back to normal. He…” he fell silent again. “Ichigo?”

“Yeah?” the red-head asked, still looking as if he was about to be sick.

“Get out of your body. Now.”

“Huh… What? Why?” He followed Kisuke’s gaze to his right and was met with two green unblinking eyes. They were cold as ice, hungry, and vicious. It was the look of a Hollow about to devour a soul. Ichigo stared back at Ulquiorra as if transfixed, seconds turning into minutes.

“Get out of your body now!” Kisuke hissed again. Ichigo didn’t show any intention to move and his hand traveled to Benihime’s hilt. Ulquiorra could easily snap the red-head’s neck at any given moment. Sucking his trapped soul out would only take a matter of seconds.

Ichigo wasn’t certain whether he was more afraid or angry. Here he had been feeling sorry for Ulquiorra only moments ago and suddenly he was about to get eaten by the bastard! This was absurd!

“Oh, shi-” Kisuke grunted when Ichigo punched the Arrancar in the face. He watched the Arrancar blink at the red-head. The punch hadn’t even scratched him.

“Are you serious?” Ulquiorra muttered. He touched his face then looked at Ichigo again. He seemed to be quite surprised. At what exactly, Kisuke didn’t know. It might have been himself experiencing a sudden craving for a soul, or Ichigo punching him with that weak Human body of his, or both.

The hungry feral look was gone from the Arrancar’s eyes and Kisuke removed his hand from Benihime. In the end, a Hollow was a Hollow, and the hungrier it was, the more dangerous it was.

“Kisuke,” Ichigo said. “Tell me again how completely safe it is to keep him at my house.”

TBC


	4. Part 4

**The Heart in My Hand**

by chayron (lttomb@yahoo.com), beta-read by Ash

Part 4

It was quiet in the living room, only the occasional shift of uncomfortable bodies heard. Absently, Ichigo twirled a cookie between his fingers, the crumbs falling on the table unheeded.

“I wouldn’t have eaten your soul.”

Ichigo turned to Ulquiorra. “Well, of course you wouldn’t have.” He pointed at Kisuke, who was sitting across the table. “He’d have lopped your head off first.” The Arrancar didn’t understand him, and Ichigo helpfully illustrated by pointing at Ulquiorra, then at the former captain, and then again at Ulquiorra, then drew his index finger over his neck, making his eyes roll back.

Kisuke was watching them with something akin to amazement. “You’ve got some nice communication going on there.”

“Oh, shut up. He almost ate me.”

“Well, I’d say ‘almost’ is the keyword here. Why don’t you just leave your body?” the former captain suggested.

“I won’t give him the satisfaction!”

“I don’t think he cares,” Kisuke said, standing up. Through the narrow path amongst the papers on the floor, he walked to the door and disappeared behind it.

Ichigo and Ulquiorra looked at each other questioningly, and with a demonstrative snort, Ichigo turned away.

“What are you? A child?” Ulquiorra muttered.

“You just tried to eat me. And to think I’m helping you out. I’m an idiot. I’m a total idiot! And what if you go out on the street and…”

Ulquiorra watched Ichigo’s non-stop moving mouth, but didn’t ask him to repeat or explain. It was obvious that he was ranting, venting his frustrations. He had a good reason to. He really had been about to attack Ichigo. It wasn’t so surprising either, he was famished. Meanwhile, Ichigo’s soul was exuding the most delicious aroma ever. At some point, it had just become pure instinct; a stupid, fearless, and reckless instinct that had nearly got him killed by Urahara. He hadn’t felt like that for a good decade, not since he had been turned into an Arrancar. It was disturbing.

Ulquiorra looked around the room. He’d had enough time to explore the shop earlier while Ichigo and Urahara had been talking, but now he needed something to distract himself. He couldn’t believe Urahara had left him and Ichigo alone after he had nearly… And Ichigo was still in his body. The red-head was the incarnation of stubbornness. It was bordering on stupidity. The last time they had fought, Ichigo had asked him to chop his limbs off to make matters equal between them. Was that stubbornness or stupidity? Or just stupid stubbornness? Ichigo, however, smelled delicious no matter how stupid or stubborn he was. The taste must be extraordinary. The Human was probably followed by Hollows day and night. There must be many who had tried to…

Startled, Ulquiorra turned to the door when it opened. Kisuke walked in, carrying two lunch boxes. He picked his way through the documents then set the boxes on the table in front of the Arrancar. 

“I’m sorry for being a bad host,” he apologized to Ulquiorra.

The Arrancar stared at him, not certain what had been said then looked at the boxes.

“I should have told you,” he finally said, taking one box into his hands and taking the lid off.

Ulquiorra had manners, Kisuke had to give him that. No matter how starved he was, he didn’t start eating the food at once. Carefully, he picked a sandwich from the box and started eating. Watching him, Kisuke felt he could understand why Ichigo had decided to reach out to this creature.

“When he finishes the box, come for more,” Kisuke told Ichigo. He pulled out his fan from his pocket. “It’s best that he doesn’t go around hungry,” he said thoughtfully, fanning himself.

Ichigo snorted. “Yeah, tell me about it.”

“Well, such is a Hollow’s nature.”

“Yeah, top of the food chain.”

The red-head was quite right, and the former captain hid his grin behind the fan. “But so are you,” he said softly. Ichigo glared at him and Kisuke chuckled. “He’ll be fine when he gets stronger. I doubt this will happen again. His body is regenerating, even restructuring itself in some cases. That’s why he needs so much food at the moment.”

Wordlessly, Ichigo watched Ulquiorra devour the contents of the box with unconcealed appetite. The red-head stuck the rest of the cookie inside his mouth and drank his tea to wash it down. He reached out for the cake. The Arrancar had told neither of them that he was hungry, and meanwhile he had been gobbling down cookies. This was somehow…

“Just don’t think of giving him any of the usual food. Then it really will fall through that hole of his. But I’m sure he won’t touch it anyway.”

Ichigo turned to Kisuke. “Kon told you?”

“Yeah, he couldn’t stop laughing.”

“Well, how was I supposed to know?”

Kisuke nodded his head towards Ulquiorra. “Why didn’t he tell you?”

Ichigo shoveled more cake into his mouth. “I think he found it funny. Or silly. Or maybe just wanted to see how far I’d go. He likes testing people.”

“Testing for what?” Kisuke wondered.

“Hmm…even if you ask me, I’m not sure. For certain reactions?”

Quietly, they watched the Arrancar eat. Spirit particles in the form of sandwiches, chicken legs, pizza slices, croquets, everything disappeared in Ulquiorra’s mouth.

“So he only needs to eat a lot and he’ll be fine?” Ichigo asked just to be certain.

“Yes, no interference is needed. He’ll probably sleep a lot, too.”

Ichigo shook his head. “Not really. He got up earlier than me.”

“That was probably because he was hungry.” Kisuke laughed at the alarm apparent on Ichigo’s face. “Well, you’re still alive,” he comforted the red-head.

Ichigo opened his mouth then closed it; there was no point in commenting.

Ulquiorra finished the lunch box in about fifteen minutes. When it was obvious that he wasn’t going to open the other one, Ichigo decided that it was time to go home; it was late evening already.

ooOoOoOoo

The room was half-lit when Ulquiorra woke up. When he looked out the window, through the gap between the curtains, he saw that it was raining. It seemed that it was already morning. Ichigo was still in his futon, sleeping with his back turned to him. He could hear the red-head’s soft, rhythmical breathing. It was warm in the room and Ichigo’s upper back was bare, the covers pooling a little lower. And he smelled delicious.

That particular thought made Ulquiorra leave the bed and head to the kitchen for the second lunch box. He found it on the sideboard. He carried it over to the kitchen table, sat down, and started eating. The window was slightly ajar at the top and Ulquiorra could feel the cool, damp air seeping in from outside. From time to time he would see people walk by further down the street, cars move past. It was probably quite noisy here, only that he couldn’t hear anything at all. 

So this was what a former Shinigami Captain’s home looked like. He wasn’t certain if he was surprised or not. He was more surprised about him having had three children with a female Human. Since Ichigo was a half-breed, it was clear where his Shinigami powers came from. What remained unclear was his ability to turn into a Vasto Lorde. It bothered Ulquiorra more than he would have liked.

He was also somewhat bothered by Isshin Kurosaki’s impending return from wherever he had gone to. Just like Ichigo, the former captain wasn’t known for having a violent nature, but his reaction to an Arrancar staying at his house with his relatively defenseless children was hard to predict. Well, it had been Ichigo’s idea, and he hadn’t done anything to hurt them.

Ulquiorra was almost done with the box when he felt vibrations along the floor. Waiting, he looked towards the door, but no one entered. He soon saw a car pull away from behind the bushes and speed away. He rose from the table with the intention of checking the front door but at that moment one of Ichigo’s sisters, Yuzu, entered the kitchen. She looked startled at the sight of him then smiled and greeted. He nodded in answer and, motioning at the window, gave her a questioning look.

Yuzu looked around then spotted the notebook on the kitchen table. It took her a few minutes to explain to Ulquiorra that while her father was absent, the clinic didn’t provide medical care. Instead, people were sent to the town hospital. After that, she went on to prepare breakfast.

Ulquiorra had already seen her make breakfast the day before. He guessed that she was always the first to rise in the morning. He watched Yuzu going through the fridge and bowls quickly. She soon fixed something up in a large bowl then turned both the stove and the kettle on. A tower of pancakes was rising steadily while she packed the lunch boxes, getting them ready for herself and her siblings.

Karin jogged into the kitchen at nearly the same time that her sister was done making the pancakes. She greeted them, grabbed a plate from the sideboard, shoveled a few pancakes into it, and plopped down into the seat opposite Ulquiorra. Yuzu carried the jam and her tea to the table and placed them in front of them. Ulquiorra shook his head and pushed them closer to Karin’s plate. He pulled out a chicken leg from the lunch box and, after receiving a few looks from the sisters, started eating. The same routine as yesterday.

Kon snuck into the kitchen when they were done eating. He gave Ulquiorra a ferocious glare, his plush mouth moved, and, despite the fact that Ulquiorra wasn’t able to hear anything, he suddenly felt that it was very noisy in the kitchen. 

“I’ll put you back into the laundry box,” Ulquiorra warned Kon when his mouth didn’t stop moving for several minutes. That worked. The plush bear gave him one of the most threatening looks he had ever seen, but he closed his mouth. The bear hopped onto one of the free chairs at the table and sat there, pouting.

Soon the sisters left for school, leaving Ulquiorra and Kon in their own company. Kon didn’t last long. With one last glare at the Arrancar, he jumped off the chair and scurried out of the kitchen. Regretfully, Ulquiorra tapped the side of his already empty lunch box. The food was a pain. He would have to think of something or he might really end up attacking Ichigo or one of his sisters.

The Arrancar left the empty lunch box on the table and walked closer to the window. He leaned on the windowsill and watched the rain. It had been at least a few hundred years, probably even more since he had seen it last. He wished he could hear the sound it was making.

He wasn’t certain how long he had been staring out the window when he felt vibrations along the floor and turned around to see Ichigo enter the kitchen. The red-head gave him a look then took note of the empty lunch box on the kitchen table, then looked back at him again. Ulquiorra thought that he appeared older wearing his Shinigami clothes.

“Not in your body today?” Ulquiorra wondered somewhat amused.

Ichigo yawned and scratched his stomach lazily. “Had to give it to Kon. He went on a date with Orihime. They went today since she got a call from her relatives and is supposed to…” The Arrancar kept staring at him and Ichigo stopped talking. He walked over to the table and took the notebook. He wrote his words down and showed them to Ulquiorra. He was getting used to this.

“Oh,” Ulquiorra said, his hands rising to his chest, “the girl with big…” Ulquiorra trailed off at the look Ichigo was giving him. “...feet?” he said, lowering his hands.

There was a pause then Ichigo started laughing. “Yeah, that’s her,” he said, “Orihime.” Still grinning, he looked at the window. “The weather sucks for a date, though.”

“So you lent it your body to meet a female,” Ulquiorra drawled, as if summing something up. 

The Arrancar didn’t say another word, but it was enough to make Ichigo feel awkward since he knew perfectly well what Ulquiorra must be thinking. If the Arrancar knew the whole story, though, he’d probably have said a lot more than that. He had already been hesitant about lending Kon his body. He still didn’t quite understand why Orihime decided to go out with Kon. Or maybe he understood very well, maybe that was the reason he had been feeling awkward and guilty recently. He and Orihime had broken up about a year ago. They had been going out for about two months and everything was more or less fine, then everything just started going downhill and, after having lasted a couple more months, they broke up. 

It had mostly been his fault. And now he didn’t know how he had gotten himself into a situation like this, where Kon was using his body to go out with his ex-girlfriend. No matter how he looked at it, it was nonsensical and yet he couldn’t bring himself to stop it. He knew Kon didn’t mean harm, he was just silly and excited and would probably jump anything with breasts, but Orihime… How did it work for her?

“I see you’ve finished your lunch box,” Ichigo said after a long, awkward pause. He pointed at the box.

“It is empty. I will need more,” Ulquiorra said after he saw where Ichigo was pointing. 

“We’ll go to Urahara’s Shop later,” the red-head said with a nod. “First, there are some questions I want to ask you.” Sitting down at the table, he motioned for Ulquiorra to follow his lead. Interested, the Arrancar approached the table and sat down. Plagued by uncertainty of how he should start and how much he should say, Ichigo rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably. He had tried to sort his thoughts out beforehand but now they were chaotic again.

Ulquiorra watched the red-head scribble into the notebook. Ichigo wanted to know how old he was. Ulquiorra wondered why that was relevant at all. He shrugged.

“It is quite difficult to follow the flow of years in Hueco Mundo, so I cannot really tell. Probably over a hundred years. No, maybe two?”

Absently, Ichigo drew a circle in the notebook. Was this Ulquiorra really a clone? “Do you remember your life as a Human?”

Ulquiorra shook his head. “No, not at all.”

Ichigo was a little disappointed. “I see…” he drawled. He wondered what life as a Hollow was like. It was somehow difficult to grasp. Was there anything to grasp at all, though? They were vicious and cunning, trying to lure and catch their prey at any cost. That was nearly all they were capable of, and he usually just killed Hollows. There had been a few exceptions, but… 

“What did you do as a Hollow?” Ichigo wrote down and regretted asking because now the Arrancar was giving him a long stare. Well, really, what could a Hollow do except hunt for souls and other Hollows? The silence stretched in the kitchen until it became nearly tangible and the red-head thought it was better to leave it and never come back to this question again.

“I was a tree,” Ulquiorra said finally.

Ichigo blinked at him. “A tree..?” he asked again, confused. “How ‘a tree’? How can you be a tree?” He frowned at Ulquiorra. “That’s not funny, you know.” 

Ulquiorra shrugged at Ichigo’s confused and bewildered face. He realized that it was difficult to believe or understand, but Hueco Mundo was vastly different from the Human World. Things in Hueco Mundo could come into or out of existence based on nothing but raw emotions. It was a barren, dark and sandy place, a desert with a few rocks and trees. Due to its sheer immensity, however, it always appeared soothing. He liked it there. Most of those memories were blurry, all he could remember was melancholy and nostalgia, but he had been at peace.

“I converged with a tree.”

“Ugh…” Ichigo hummed, shaking his head, lost. He waved his hands about. “Why? It’s a tree! It can’t walk, it can’t talk!” Ulquiorra didn’t seem to understand his bewilderment and Ichigo lowered his hands. “So what did you do as a tree?”

Now it was Ulquiorra who looked surprised. “We grew,” he said in a self-explanatory manner as if talking to a child. “We grew roots and branches. We blossomed once. It was quiet, sometimes we listened, but mostly we just slept and grew.”

Ichigo rubbed his forehead. Any other time, he would have probably found this funny, but now it was not funny at all. This talk was just giving him an eerie and creepy feeling. He found it hard to fathom, that kind of life – to do something like that on his own volition… What was more, Ulquiorra was nostalgic about that kind of life, he talked fondly of it. How bad could things be to make one want to spend their life as a tree?

“Why did you become a Hollow?” Ichigo asked even though he already knew the answer.

“I don’t remember that, I just was. Why are you asking me all these questions?”

“Ahh…” Ichigo shifted in his chair awkwardly. “Well, I was just trying to get to the part where you appear in Soul Society, in Mayuri’s lab.”

Ulquiorra’s eyebrows rose. “This is one long run-up.”

The Arrancar looked amused and Ichigo snorted. “Yeah, well, I didn’t know how else to do it.”

Ulquiorra watched the red-head try to cover up his awkwardness. Humans were strange. Ichigo was trying to be considerate, but considerate of what exactly?

“He found a part of my horn in Hueco Mundo and cloned me. I was kept in his laboratory for a while, maybe for a year or two. I was mostly unconscious, so I can’t tell.”

Ichigo stared at him. “Ah,” he finally said. “I thought you might not know.”

“Why would I not know?”

Honest confusion was apparent on Ulquiorra’s face, and Ichigo realized that there were still many things he didn’t know about Hollows. Kisuke had told him about their peculiar memory capabilities; how many other things did he not know? Musing, the red-head turned his head to the window where the rain was pelting down. If someone had told him that one day he would be sitting with Ulquiorra in his home, at his kitchen table and having a conversation just like that…

Ulquiorra turned to the window which had lit up suddenly and Ichigo started in his seat at the booming sound. It was a flash of lightning and thunder. The Arrancar somehow knew this on a subconscious level, just as he knew what rain was even though it never rained in Hueco Mundo.

“Kurosaki will not be happy to find me here.”

It took Ichigo a few moments to realize that Ulquiorra was talking about his father. That was true – he still didn’t know how he was going to break the news to his father. Besides, breaking the news was one thing; the action his father would take was another. The red-head knew very well that he shouldn’t have taken the Arrancar home, but it wasn’t like he could have left him there to be captured or killed either. It hadn’t exactly been a spur of the moment decision. Ichigo knew that, if faced with the same choice, he’d do the same.

Just to spite Ulquiorra, Ichigo wanted to tell him that as long as he didn’t try eating anyone, it should be fine, but decided that it wasn’t worth it. Ichigo’s anger concerning the incident in Urahara’s Shop had simmered down. He knew that it had been unconscious. That, however, didn’t make Ulquiorra any less dangerous.

“It’ll be fine,” Ichigo finally said.

“Are there any other questions you have?”

It seemed that Ulquiorra was serious and wasn’t trying to mock him. There were a few more questions Ichigo wanted to ask, but they concerned Mayuri’s research and it would make more sense if Kisuke cleared those up himself. Otherwise, he doubted Ulquiorra would want to speak about the time he spent in captivity, nobody would. He could only imagine how awful it was.

“No,” Ichigo said, shaking his head. “I don’t think anything else is my business.”

“I will have to return there and destroy the laboratory,” Ulquiorra said.

His body suddenly rigid, Ichigo leaned forward in his seat. “I don’t think that’s a very good idea.”

Ulquiorra didn’t understand what Ichigo had said but the objection to the idea was clear on the red-head’s face and, in reaction to it, the Arrancar’s eyes lit up like bright emerald. They glared at each other challengingly. For some reason, it only now became apparent to Ichigo that Ulquiorra would want revenge. He would try to kill Mayuri too, just as he had snapped Nemu’s neck. It was wrong, but Ichigo couldn’t deny that if Ulquiorra did this, he would be able to justify his actions. 

The Arrancar noticed the red-head’s glare soften. Ichigo broke eye contact and turned his head away. Puzzled, he watched Ichigo tap the notebook with his pen.

Ichigo realized that Ulquiorra was waiting for him to say something. With a sigh, he started writing. He wondered why Ulquiorra just didn’t want to start everything anew. Just to return to Hueco Mundo and…well, just do what Hollows do.

“You all keep calling me a Hollow,” Ulquiorra said after reading what Ichigo had scribbled down. “I am not. And yes, I will return to Hueco Mundo as soon as I deal with him.”

Ichigo suppressed a groan. This was going to blow up right in his face. Or right in Mayuri’s face. “I understand that you’ve got a bone to pick with him; I won’t interfere in your and Mayuri’s affairs. But there can’t be any innocent victims.”

Ulquiorra’s eyebrow arched. “Innocent? In that case you could blow up the entire Soul Society and there would be no victims.”

Ichigo rolled his eyes. The pot calling the kettle black. “I’m serious here.”

“I think you have a faulty conviction that you can order me around.”

This was what Ichigo had been waiting for. He didn’t think he was ordering the Arrancar around. He, however, had to agree with Kisuke’s opinion that Ulquiorra had really been compliant all this time, too compliant. Up until now, when it really mattered.

“I don’t know,” Ichigo spat, “maybe because I saved your sorry ass and now don’t want to be responsible for hundreds of innocent people’s deaths!” Nearly growling in frustration, he wrote down a few sentences, the letters big and sketchy. He slapped the notebook on the table in front of Ulquiorra.

“That’s utter drivel,” Ulquiorra said after reading. “What hundreds of deaths? I just want to destroy my horn and anything else that could be used.”

“Ah,” Ichigo said suddenly, leaning back in his chair, his frustration completely lost in shock. “Ah,” he repeated. “You think he’ll continue cloning…? Well, yes,” he drawled in realization, “He would…” Ichigo rubbed at his face with his palms. Behind his closed eyelids he could see not one but three, no, five emaciated Ulquiorras in tattered clothing, covered in their own blood, begging him to kill them. 

Ulquiorra was right, they had to destroy the horn and make sure Mayuri ceased whatever he had been doing with it. Now how to do it was… He let out a long groan. If this ended badly, he might end up accused of treason. Keeping Ulquiorra at his house probably already was.

“I’ll help you,” Ichigo said, resigned to his fate. “But we’ll need a plan. A very good plan or we’ll end up being chased by all thirteen squads and their captains. And no one has to die.”

“What? Why do you keep talking? You know I can’t hear you.”

Muttering under his breath, Ichigo started writing. He could definitely see why Ulquiorra would want to kill Mayuri, but the only thing he wanted to aid him in was destroying the horn.

Ulquiorra looked at the notebook with unconcealed surprise and his green eyes rose to Ichigo. Now there was suspicion in those eyes. “Why do you want to get involved? This doesn’t concern you at all.”

“Yes, it does,” Ichigo said firmly. “I don’t like what he’s doing either. And…” Not finishing his sentence, he turned his head at the sound of the front door opening and closed his mouth. His own voice wafted from the corridor and soon Kon and Orihime appeared in the kitchen doorway. Kon gave Ichigo a sheepish look.

“She wanted to see him as soon as I told her.”

“Oh, really?” Ichigo wondered. “And what part of ‘Don’t tell anyone’ did you not understand?”

TBC


	5. Part 5

**The Heart in My Hand**

by chayron (lttomb@yahoo.com), beta-read by Ash

Part 5

Ichigo shoveled a spoon of tea leaves into each cup and added sugar. Waiting for the kettle to boil, he glanced at the table, where three other people were seated. Ulquiorra was sitting quietly, looking at Orihime, who was shouting at him, asking him about his health. It didn’t seem he was keen on talking much. Kon looked rather bewildered about the situation. Ichigo could tell he regretted bringing Orihime here.

“He can’t hear you,” Ichigo said.

“Are you eating properly?” she shouted even louder, making Kon cover his ears.

“No, he can’t hear you,” Ichigo tried again. “As in he’s deaf. Just use that notebook to talk to him.”

Shocked, Orihime turned to Ichigo. “Why is he deaf? He wasn’t deaf last time I saw him.”

“It’s…a bit complicated,” Ichigo said. He didn’t want to get her any more involved than she already was. He was going to strangle Kon later. 

“Is he eating properly? He’s very frail. It’s like there’s only half of him left.”

“We’re working on that,” Ichigo assured her.

“Oh, I know!” she said, turning back to Ulquiorra to give the Arrancar a bright smile. “I’ll bring you some food from my part-time job every day! It’s only buns and breads, but they’re very nutritious and tasty.”

“Umm, he can’t really…”

“And milk! You have to drink milk every day. It’s full of proteins, very good for you.”

Seeing how Ulquiorra just kept staring at her wordlessly, Orihime grabbed the notebook and started writing quickly. Ichigo and Kon exchanged looks over her bent head. ‘Do something!’ Kon mouthed. Ichigo shrugged. She was going to smother Ulquiorra with care and concern. She was good at that.

He brought the tea to the table, put one cup in front of Kon, the other in front of Orihime and sat down. He watched Ulquiorra read her handwriting, his facial expression never changing. Ichigo was a little surprised – he had expected Ulquiorra to show more reaction to Orihime’s presence. He had been under the impression that something had clicked between them right before his death. Something important, but he didn’t understand what it had been.

“Oh, right!” Orihime said enthusiastically. “I’ve got some vitamins.” She grabbed her handbag off the chair and started digging around in it.

From personal experience, Ichigo knew that Orihime’s handbag was in the same family branch as black holes and that this was going to take a while. He nudged Kon in the side and told him to drink his tea to warm up. He had warned Kon to take an umbrella before leaving the house, but the Modified Soul had still managed to forget it. He had already changed out of his wet clothes but his hair was still damp. The last thing Ichigo needed was for his body to catch a cold.

Orihime wasn’t having much luck with her black hole and hung it back onto the back of the chair. Then her face lit up with realization and she jumped to her feet. She rushed out of the kitchen and into the corridor. Slowly, Ulquiorra pushed the notebook away from himself.

“Just nod a lot,” Ichigo suggested, nodding his head repeatedly to illustrate. “That usually helps.”

Kon sniggered. “Well, now I can see why you two didn’t last long.”

“Longer than you anyway,” Ichigo said with a snort. “And give my freaking body back! You’re going to give it a cold!”

“No way! We’re still on a date!” Kon protested harshly.

“The hell you are. Look how she’s…” he trailed off at the sight of Orihime reentering the kitchen. She was carrying a small varicolored bottle. 

“I had them in my raincoat all along,” she said, walking over to the table quickly. With a sheepish smile, she held out the bottle for Ulquiorra. 

The Arrancar reached out for the bottle but then something strange happened to Orihime’s steps. Her right foot slipped, her body lurching sideways and the next thing Ulquiorra knew he was being knocked out of the chair and then he was airborne. He huffed loudly when his back hit the floor, Orihime landing on top of him. The vitamin bottle exploded on his shoulder, spilling varicolored pills in all directions.

Kon was staring at them on the floor, his teacup frozen in the air, his mouth open. Ulquiorra didn’t dare move, his face having been swallowed by two huge lulling mounds. Kon felt he was about to explode with jealousy. Miracles like this only happened once in a lifetime.

Orihime scrambled off the Arrancar quickly. “I’m so sorry!” she apologized at once. “Are you okay? I think I tripped over something.” She looked around to see what had been the cause and saw the floor was wet near Kon’s chair. It must be from his hair. “I’m so sorry,” she repeated.

Ulquiorra watched her gathering the scattered pills off the floor and bent down to help. He picked up a few pills and inspected them curiously. They were shaped in various forms, mostly like some kinds of animals. 

“It’s alright. It’s alright, really,” Ulquiorra muttered when Orihime didn’t stop apologizing for a few minutes. “It’s not easy to keep balance with such big…feet, I’d imagine.”

Orihime blushed. “Yes, I’m sorry.”

Kon looked at Ichigo, who seemed to have choked on something. The red-head was coughing and laughing at the same time. “If he’s trying to flirt with her, he’s got the artistic flair of a blindfolded giraffe on morphine,” Kon spat. He glared at Ichigo, who bent over the table in renewed spasms of laughter. “This is not funny! He’s flirting with my girlfriend!”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” Ichigo laughed. He pointed at the notebook in the middle of the table. “Feel free to write a letter of complaint to him.”

Kon grabbed the notebook and the pen. Angry characters, words, and sentences quickly formed on the page. His enthusiasm lessened somewhat when Ulquiorra and Orihime were done picking up the vitamins and had returned to sit at the table. Orihime poured the pills she had gathered in front of Ulquiorra and the Arrancar nodded quickly. With a roll of his eyes, Kon tore the page out and slapped it on the hill of pills. Ulquiorra took it, read, then, giving Kon a stare that could make mountains shiver, crumpled the paper in his fist. 

Ichigo’s eyes followed the paper ball’s elegant arch into the sink. Orihime celebrated the accurate throw with an excited applause. Ichigo lowered his eyes to stare at Kon’s mug but burst out laughing anyway.

“Do you have an empty bottle to put the pills in?” Orihime asked.

“I’ll take a look,” Ichigo said, grateful for an excuse to leave the table before he could make an ass of himself. He went to search through the cupboards and the sideboard. While busying himself, he could hear Orihime and Kon talking. The Modified Soul was explaining to her how Ulquiorra appeared in his house. Kon kept quiet about a lot of things; he never mentioned Mayuri, but Ichigo had already planned to put him into the washing-machine and set it for the longest and most thorough wash cycle there was and nothing was going to change his mind.

When Ichigo returned to the table, he saw that Ulquiorra had kept himself busy as well: three squads of yellow lions, green crocodiles, and brown monkeys had formed in front of him. He was still working on the cats, separating them from the rest of varicolored pills. Ichigo put the small tin he had found in front of Ulquiorra and sat down.

“I’m going away for the weekend but I’ll visit again on Monday,” Orihime informed them. “And Ulquiorra needs to exercise to put on a little more muscle mass.”

“That’s awesome!” Kon chirped excitedly. “You can visit any time!”

“Well, of course,” Ichigo said with a nod. He was mostly interested in the grand battle Ulquiorra was having on the table. It seemed like the cats were winning against the lions. Then a squad of crocodiles swept into the battlefield. The cats fled.

They talked about this and that then, about half an hour later, the rain let up and, using the opportunity, Kon and Orihime decided to leave and continue with their date. 

“It’ll be different when he can finally hear,” she was saying while putting her shoes on in the corridor.

“Yeah,” Ichigo agreed. “In a week or so.” He watched her buckle them up. Those were the shoes he had bought for her seventeenth birthday. They looked a little worn already but she was still wearing them. He felt nostalgic all of a sudden. Then, Kon helped her put on her raincoat and, with a quick goodbye, they left.

Ichigo closed the door after them and, feeling somewhat lost, stared at it. A few moments later, he turned around and went to the kitchen. Ulquiorra had swept the vitamins off the table and was pouring them into the tin. Ichigo walked over to the table, took the notebook, and asked who won. 

“The crocodiles apparently,” Ulquiorra said with an amused grunt. “They were far better organized than the lions.” He put the lid over the tin and pushed it into Ichigo’s hands. “But that may also be because I like green better than yellow.”

ooOoOoOoo

It was pouring again, but since the two of them were spiritual beings, the rain didn’t bother them. It washed over them but didn’t stick to either their clothes or bodies. It was just more difficult to see through the white sheen of it.

Ichigo glanced at Ulquiorra, who was following him. It was obvious that the Arrancar knew the way already, flitting from one rooftop to another effortlessly. It was very likely that he had known the way even before coming to the Human World. As Aizen’s subordinate he had probably been informed where Kisuke Urahara lived.

What Ichigo found peculiar was that Ulquiorra didn’t have his Zanpakuto anymore. It had disappeared yesterday after unsuccessfully exploring the bathroom and had been gone ever since. 

It had only been two days yet it seemed as if so much had happened during them. He felt a little overwhelmed. No, “a little” was an understatement. He had even promised to help Ulquiorra retrieve the horn from Mayuri. He had probably gotten ahead of himself but they had to stop him. What Mayuri had done to Ulquiorra should never be done to any living and reasoning thing. The problem was how to prevent Ulquiorra from trying to kill Mayuri.

Deep in his thoughts, Ichigo didn’t even notice when he landed outside Urahara’s Shop. Surprised, he looked at the door, then heard the soft sound of Ulquiorra landing a few steps behind him. The red-head pushed the door open and the chime made a loud clear sound, announcing their visit. Ichigo greeted Ururu at the counter then asked where Kisuke was. 

“In the living room,” she said with a glance at Ulquiorra. She blushed lightly remembering yesterday. The incident had finally pushed Jinta into confessing to her. Red-faced, he had mumbled and stammered a lot but the final result was that they were going out now. She had baked a cake for Ulquiorra in thanks.

Unaware of her grateful eyes and happy thoughts, Ichigo and Ulquiorra walked past rows of showcases with various items and headed for the living room. The red-head opened the door and something black slipped through it and between his legs. The next moment, Ulquiorra’s reiatsu engulfed him. Ichigo turned his head to see Ulquiorra’s greenish Zanpakuto appear in his hand, already drawn. The red-head grabbed the Arrancar’s wrist and pushed it down. Kisuke’s reiatsu rose in response to Ulquiorra’s and he appeared in the doorway too, his Benihime ready. While Ichigo’s right hand was gripping Zangetsu’s hilt behind his back, he realized that he needed a third hand, because Ulquiorra was now forming a Cero. The shop was about to undergo a massive overhaul. 

“Argh, stop it, everyone!” Ichigo growled. He turned to Ulquiorra. “Stop it!” 

“I was just about to leave,” Yoruichi said to Ulquiorra. “There’s no need to be so rude.”

“He can’t hear you,” Ichigo said automatically. “And you’re a cat; I don’t think he can read your lips.” As soon as he had said that, he regretted it. He waited for a loud booming sound but none came. Yoruichi kept her form as a cat and just sat on her hind legs, staring at Ulquiorra fixedly. 

“Anyone else feels like an idiot?” Ichigo asked a few moments later. “How about we disarm?”

“How about you tell that to your buddy?” Kisuke asked. “He’s got a Cero aimed at my head.”

“Well, you’ve got Benihime aimed at his neck,” Ichigo pointed out. “And he’s not my buddy.”

“Tell him to disperse his Cero.”

Ichigo glanced at Ulquiorra but the Arrancar’s grim face showed that it was unlikely he was in the mood to listen. The red-head was quite surprised that Ulquiorra wasn’t trying to shake his hand off his wrist and free his Zanpakuto.

“Okay, how about all of us disarm at the count of three?” Ichigo suggested.

“Sounds good to me,” Kisuke agreed. He watched Ichigo let go of Zangetsu and show three fingers to Ulquiorra, then motion with his hand at himself, Ulquiorra, and him. Ichigo didn’t seem to realize that he had already let go of his Zanpakuto.

“Okay,” Ichigo said, turning back to Kisuke. “One, two, three!” He gave an accusing look to Kisuke. “You didn’t let go.”

“Well, neither did he.”

“Alright,” Yoruichi said, moving forward. “As amusing as this is to watch, I am in a bit of a hurry.” She whisked between Ulquiorra’s feet and minced down the corridor with her tail high in the air.

Ulquiorra watched her go and the Cero in his hand started diminishing. He turned to Kisuke and looked at him questioningly since Benihime was still at his throat. The former captain nodded and moved his Zanpakuto away.

“Will she tell them?” Ichigo asked, letting go of Ulquiorra’s wrist. The greenish Zanpakuto disappeared. It seemed that the Arrancar had only been wary of Yoruichi. Ichigo was impressed by how well Ulquiorra could differentiate amongst various energy sources. First time he had seen Yoruichi as a cat, and he didn’t even think there was anything special about it.

“She won’t,” Kisuke said, walking back into the living room. He motioned for Ulquiorra and Ichigo to sit down at the table. “That was just a friendly visit.”

After walking into the room, Ichigo was astonished by the change – instead of commonly scattered papers everywhere on the floor, there were now five neat stacks of paper along the wall. There wasn’t a speck of dust on the floor; even a small potted plant had been placed in the corner near the door. This phenomenon occurred only when Yoruichi paid Kisuke a visit. It was quite funny how he tried to make a good impression on her. They had been acquainted for so long that Ichigo doubted anything about Kisuke could impress or disappoint her anymore. Still, he made the effort, which was cute, actually.

“Orihime already knows about Ulquiorra,” Ichigo said after all of them sat down at the table. “Which, in turn, means that the rest of our friends do as well. I expect Ishida to knock at my door in an hour or two. At this rate, Soul Society will know in a few days.”

“Not necessarily,” Kisuke said. He took out his fan from his pocket and started fanning himself distractedly. “They can keep a secret from Soul Society. It’s not the first time.” Kisuke’s hand faltered at Ichigo’s wide eyes that were growing bigger by the second. He followed the red-head’s fixed look to his fan and spotted the cause of the reaction. “Oh.” 

Ichigo watched the former captain take the skimpy panties off the fan and put them into his pocket. 

“Sorry about that,” Kisuke said, continuing to fan himself. “So what were we talking… Oh, I see you found the rest of them,” he said at the sight of Ulquiorra pulling out a bra out from under the table. The Arrancar held it by the end and inspected the laces. From across the table Kisuke reached out for the garment. “Thank you very much. Now if you don’t mind…”

“Are they Yoruichi’s?” Ichigo wondered, watching the bra exchange hands.

“Well, of course they are.”

“There is more under the table,” Ulquiorra informed them.

“Leave it there,” Kisuke told him, storing the bra under the table again. “She’ll come back later to get them.”

“You should have just told us you were busy,” Ichigo said, his cheeks turning slightly pink. “It’s not like there’s an emergency; we could’ve waited.”

“I think you misunderstood something,” Kisuke said. “She always leaves her clothes here when she’s in that form.”

“Ah,” Ichigo said. He opened his mouth again but then closed it; the mystery of Yoruichi’s underwear in Kisuke’s pocket was better left unsolved. He cleared his throat. “We’ve come for more food. Actually, if you gave him more of it, we wouldn’t need to come here every day and bother you.”

“That’s true,” Kisuke agreed. “But then I wouldn’t be able to keep an eye on you two.”

“Ah.”

Kisuke left the room and returned a few minutes later with two boxes in his hands. One was the usual lunch box, the other slightly bigger. He put them on the table in front of Ulquiorra. With a thanks, Ulquiorra took the bigger box and opened it. It was a cake. There was also a short note on top of it.

“A cake?” Ichigo wondered.

“Yes, it’s a special thanks from Ururu,” Kisuke said. “Just ask her,” he said when Ichigo gave him an incredulous look as if wondering if he should also barge into the bathroom while she was taking a shower. Jinta had recently been a pain and Kisuke didn’t want to go into details. “So any news?” he asked instead.

Ichigo let out a melodramatic sigh. “Well, he knows he’s a clone. Doesn’t really bother him. Actually, he’s not easily bothered in general.”

“Very good,” Kisuke said cheerfully. “The last thing we need is an Arrancar with an identity crisis.”

Ichigo watched Ulquiorra put away the note after reading it and take the knife and fork that were inside the box with the cake. He considered telling Kisuke about Ulquiorra’s intentions concerning Mayuri but decided against it – there was no telling what his reaction would be.

“Why is his Zanpakuto gone?” the red-head wondered. “How can it be gone?”

“Well, it’s not exactly a Zanpakuto. It works differently with Arrancars than with Shinigamis. For us, a Zanpakuto is the power source itself, for Arrancars it is the opposite. For them, a Zanpakuto is only a tool to store their residual energy. When the need arises they release the seal on their Zanpakuto and use the energy stored in it for their transformations.”

“I see,” Ichigo said after having mulled over the fact for a few moments. “Then, since he doesn’t have a lot of residual energy, he decided not to bother.”

“Precisely.”

“It is very good.”

Ichigo and Kisuke turned to Ulquiorra. The Arrancar had a blissful expression on his face and was obviously enjoying the cake. Ichigo reached out for the fork in Ulquiorra’s hand, and Kisuke tensed. There was, however, barely a reaction from Ulquiorra when the red-head took the fork and scooped up some cake to try it.

“How did she even make it?” Ichigo wondered, humming around it. Giving a thumbs-up, he passed the fork back to Ulquiorra. “It tastes like her usual cakes. What?” he asked, seeing the look on Kisuke’s face.

“Hollows don’t usually share their meals easily. I was waiting for him to gauge your eye out with that fork.”

“Why would he? He told us it was tasty so he obviously wanted to share. And besides,” Ichigo added, shaking his head, “he isn’t so petty as to fight over a cake.”

Thoughtfully, Kisuke lowered his chin on top of his fan. That was what made Ichigo who he was. He accepted others naturally and without prejudice. He was wary of course, but he always gave the other a chance. 

“Is there anything else he told you?” Kisuke asked.

“Well, I didn’t ask him about what Mayuri did to him if that’s what you want to know; I don’t think he’d want to talk about it. I questioned him about his life as a Hollow, but…” Ichigo chuckled. “He actually told me he was a tree.”

Kisuke nodded at the red-head’s dubious face. “Yes, he was. For about a century.”

“Seriously?”

“Well, why would he lie about that?”

“It’s not that I thought he lied but… It’s not something I hear every day. By the way, how do you know he really was a tree?”

“From Aizen’s records.” Kisuke motioned at the currently clean floor around them. “It just took me a while to find them. He has records on every Arrancar he has ever created.” Kisuke hid his mouth behind the fan, his mischievous eyes glinting. “I took the liberty of taking a peek at them and making copies when Aizen was wreaking havoc.”

“Hmm…” Ichigo hummed. You could trust Kisuke to make use of any situation. “Is there anything about his Human life? Did he even have one?”

Kisuke nodded. “Yes, he was a Human about two hundred years ago.”

Ichigo perked up. “Oh? So what caused him to become a Hollow?”

Kisuke fanned himself slowly. “He killed his wife.”

Ichigo frowned and leaned closer over the table, thinking he had misheard. “Come again?”

“He shot his wife,” Kisuke repeated monotonously. “Caught her cheating on him with their neighbor. He tried to kill the neighbor, too, but since he was drunk and his aim wasn’t so good, the neighbor managed to escape and barricade himself in his house. Later, after realizing what he had done, he hanged himself in their barn. Plagued by the guilt and remorse, he couldn’t leave the Living World, and this caused him to turn into a Hollow. A few years later he finally left for Hueco Mundo.”

The red-head stared at Kisuke with his mouth hanging open. “Eh,” he finally squeaked when the whole story had sunk in. From the corner of his eye, he glanced at Ulquiorra, who was peacefully enjoying his cake. He found it hard to believe that Ulquiorra could be driven to such extremities by jealousy like that. He never gave the impression.

The intent gaze made Ulquiorra raise his head and meet Ichigo’s eyes. The Arrancar must have read something in that stare because he pulled out a notebook and a pen from his pocket and pushed it over the table to Ichigo.

“What is it?”

Ichigo shook his head and pushed the notebook away. “Later.” Ulquiorra gave him a discontent look but said nothing. He turned his attention back to his cake.

“Did they have any children?” Ichigo asked.

Kisuke shrugged. “The records don’t say anything about them, so probably not.”

“He told me he doesn’t remember anything.”

“He doesn’t,” Kisuke confirmed. “None of them do - it’s like becoming a clean slate. Once they turn into Hollows, they forget their Human lives completely.”

“So he doesn’t know,” Ichigo stated.

The former captain shrugged. “He does if Aizen told him. There are also his and his wife’s names, but I don’t think they would mean anything to him. Even if he was told... For him this is just some story he has no recollection of. It’s doubtful he would have even believed Aizen.”

They watched Ulquiorra push aside the half-eaten cake and open the lunch box. He obviously wanted a break from sweetness. Kisuke folded his fan and lowered it to his lap. Recently his days had become busy with the visits from Yoruichi and Ichigo. Jinta and Ururu had also been a handful. Maybe it was alright, though, since his days were usually dull.

“So have you asked him what he intends to do about Mayuri?”

Ichigo scratched the back of his head urgently. “Ahh… Well, he doesn’t like him much.”

“I’d be surprised if he did.”

“Umm…” Ichigo drawled uncertainly. “I think you’d better ask him yourself.”

Amused, Kisuke took the notebook from the table and, after writing down the question, pushed it over to Ulquiorra. The Arrancar read it, glanced at Ichigo then looked at Kisuke again. He picked the notebook off the table and, wordlessly, stored it back in his pocket. As an afterthought, Ulquiorra also reached out for the pen and put it in his other pocket.

Kisuke waited for a few moments but it became obvious that the Arrancar didn’t even consider answering. The former captain chuckled. “Well, that’s as good an answer as any. And to think that I’ve been so courteous… Giving food and everything…”

“I think the word is ‘curious’ not ‘courteous’,” Ichigo corrected him. He rolled his eyes as Kisuke gave him an overly insulted look and covered the lower half of his face with his fan.

TBC


	6. Part 6

**The Heart in My Hand**

by chayron (lttomb@yahoo.com), beta-read by Ash

Part 6

It was quiet in the shop, and Ichigo could hear the soft patter of rain against the roof and walls. Ulquiorra had finally stopped eating and had stacked the two nearly empty boxes on top of each other next to him. He was clearly sleepy now, trying to stifle yawns, and his usually incredibly green eyes were somewhat hazy. Ichigo caught Kisuke watching him and raised a questioning eyebrow.

“I know he’ll try to take revenge on Mayuri,” Kisuke said. “Don’t get involved.”

Ichigo’s eyes widened innocently. “Me? Get involved? Never!”

The former captain let out a tortured sigh. He knew Ichigo would intervene. He always had and always would as long as he deemed it was necessary. Kisuke didn’t know why he bothered opening his mouth. It was necessary that Ulquiorra interfered – the Arrancar simply had no other choice, and Ichigo was going to follow him, either to stop him or to help him, most likely both at once, but he was going to follow Ulquiorra.

“Oh, right,” Kisuke said, remembering. “I want to scan him again to check how his wounds are closing up.”

Ichigo found himself nodding then frowned. It was as if Kisuke was asking for his permission. “Why don’t you just tell him that?”

The former captain rolled his eyes and fanned himself irritably. “He doesn’t like me and he trusts me even less.” He snapped his fan shut and pointed it at Ichigo. “And it’s faster this way – I don’t need to write.”

From the end of the fan that was aimed at the red-head’s chest, Ulquiorra’s sleepy eyes rose to Ichigo. He was thinking about asking when they could go home so that he could sprawl over the futon or the bed, whichever Ichigo would provide him with, and get some sleep.

When he was told about the delay, a discontent frown set on Ulquiorra’s face and it was clear that the idea of getting back into the apparatus didn’t please him. Kisuke watched Ichigo point at his own body then Ulquiorra’s but the Arrancar gave him an apathetic look and didn’t move. Ichigo patted his pocket and held his hand out for the notebook in Ulquiorra’s. The former captain could tell that the Arrancar was toying with the idea of refusing to hand it over.

“Ten minutes,” Kisuke said, raising both hands, fingers spread. “It will only take ten minutes.”

The Arrancar ignored him but pulled the notebook out of his pocket and held it out to Ichigo. The red-head scribbled down a few sentences and passed it back. Ulquiorra read them and an even deeper frown set on his face. He put the notebook back into his pocket, stood up and walked towards the machine.

“What did you tell him?” Kisuke asked, standing up as well.

“Just that you might find a way to make him recover faster and then he could go back to being a bloodthirsty bastard sooner and…” Ichigo trailed off with a grunt. He knew that Ulquiorra was tired and suspicious of everything. Still, he couldn’t help feeling irritated. Ulquiorra telling him that he had no right ordering him around had somehow made him more susceptible to the Arrancar’s negative reactions to his requests.

When Kisuke turned the apparatus on, Ichigo wanted to remind Ulquiorra that he had to undress but the Arrancar’s clothes flickered and disappeared before he could even open his mouth.

“Convenient,” Ichigo said, averting his eyes from the Arrancar’s white alabaster back. He took note that Ulquiorra’s skin was still covered in smears of dried blood. Lately, he hadn’t noticed any blood on Ulquiorra’s front, the Arrancar obviously having cleaned it off with whatever means he had managed to muster up.

When Ulquiorra was inside the machine, Kisuke pushed a few buttons and it set to work with a soft, low hum. The former captain turned to Ichigo, who had retreated a few meters away from the apparatus and was now motioning for him to come closer.

“Could we use the hot spring in the basement?” Ichigo asked. “He’s still covered in blood and it’s impossible to remove it using water here.” He knew he was asking a big favor – there weren’t many who knew about Kisuke’s secret training grounds. There was, however, not much point in hiding it since he was certain that they would need to use it in order to make sure Ulquiorra regained his power.

The former captain gave Ichigo a searching look, but the red-head could see that Kisuke had similar thoughts concerning the matter. Kisuke nodded.

“I’ll ask Ururu to get everything ready.”

Ichigo wondered what exactly “everything” was, but realized that it probably included towels and soap. The hot spring also had regenerating abilities, which would speed up Ulquiorra’s recovery. Or maybe it only healed external wounds; Ichigo was never sure about that.

Startled, Ichigo looked at the machine when it pinged loudly. Kisuke walked back to it to pick up a few papers it had spat out onto the floor. Studying them, he left the room in search for Ururu. He returned almost at the same time that the machine stopped whirring and the lamps blinked out. Three more pages dropped to the floor and Kisuke pushed a button to make the tray slide out of the apparatus. 

Just as Ichigo expected, Ulquiorra was sound asleep. He shook the Arrancar’s shoulder lightly to rouse him and had to lean back as Ulquiorra sat up suddenly, his hand shooting up for his throat. It stopped just a few millimeters away, the sharp white nails almost touching the red-head’s skin. Ichigo heard Benihime sliding back into its sheath. Completely still, he watched confusion clear from the bleary emerald eyes, then Ulquiorra’s arm dropped back to his side. The Arrancar slid off the tray, his clothes reappearing and solidifying before his feet touched the floor. 

“And?” Ulquiorra asked, motioning at the papers in Kisuke’s hands.

The Arrancar didn’t quite meet his eyes, his gaze sliding past his left shoulder, and Ichigo realized that he felt guilty. It was naïve to wait for an apology, but at least the Arrancar felt uncomfortable. 

The former captain picked the papers up off the floor. “I’ll need to study them first. Meanwhile, the two of you can go to the spring. Ururu should have everything ready by now.”

Ichigo hadn’t been certain if it would be easy to convince the Arrancar to go to the spring, but as soon as it was mentioned, Ulquiorra agreed. Ururu led them to the basement and then opened the trapdoor leading to the training grounds. When they had climbed down the ladder and the size and purpose of the area became apparent, the Arrancar stopped in amazement. Ichigo, who had temporarily been allowed to enjoy the possession of the notebook, jotted down a few sentences to explain to Ulquiorra that some time ago, he had used these training grounds.

Ururu led them to the hot spring, placed the toiletries near the water’s edge, and took her leave. Ulquiorra was still looking around, taking in the yellow hills and heaps of sand and rocks, the scattered trees, and the suspicious azure sky. When he turned around, he saw Ichigo lowering himself into the hot spring.

“She brought those towels for a reason,” Ichigo muttered, with an awkward motion of his hand to the pile of toiletries behind Ulquiorra’s back. The Arrancar ignored him, stepping into the hot spring completely naked. Ichigo averted his eyes.

“It’s only the two of us here,” Ulquiorra said in a somewhat amused voice. “And you’ve seen everything already.”

“I think this is the fourth time I’ve had the courtesy,” Ichigo said with a snort. “But who’s counting.” He could see that the Arrancar didn’t understand what he had said but it was pointless to explain. Ichigo watched Ulquiorra sit down opposite him and get comfortable. The water felt pleasant and the Arrancar closed his eyes, starting to nod off almost instantly. 

Ichigo pushed himself off the rock he had been leaning on and waded towards the edge to where the toiletries were arranged; if he wanted to leave the training grounds anywhere close to the current century, he had to take matters into his own hands. Wondering if he was about to cause an environmental disaster, he took a sponge and poured some shower gel on it. It didn’t look quite like common shower gel and it smelled a little funny, but it was obviously meant for washing.

“Stand up,” Ichigo said, tapping Ulquiorra on the shoulder. Ulquiorra gave him a curious look, but when he saw the sponge in his hand, Ichigo’s intentions became clear to him. “Turn around,” the red-head said, illustrating with his free hand. 

Ulquiorra had a fairly muscular back and wide shoulders even though he was slender, now even too thin. He was also about ten centimeters shorter than Ichigo and the red-head felt like he was towering over the smaller body. The color of their skin contrasted as well. While Ichigo’s was tanned under the winds and the sun, Ulquiorra’s was as white as alabaster. Brushing over the pale skin with the sponge, Ichigo marveled at the smoothness. He brushed the black strands off the nape to wash the neck as well. 

The black Hollow hole set on Ulquiorra’s sternum right where collarbones met was giving Ichigo an eerie feeling; the water that ran into it ran out the other side. For some strange reason, he had the urge to stick his hand through it. He could only imagine how Ulquiorra would react.

When there was no trace of blood on the Arrancar’s back, Ichigo squeezed the sponge into Ulquiorra’s hand, leaving the rest to him. He waded to the edge again and looked for something that would at least remotely remind him of shampoo.

Ulquiorra’s hair proved to be quite a difficulty. Ichigo tugged at the helmet, then tugged with more force when it didn’t budge. He grunted as Ulquiorra’s palm pressed against his chest firmly, pushing him away.

“What are you doing?” the Arrancar demanded.

“What does it look like? I’m trying to wash your hair.”

Ulquiorra was staring at his mouth, giving him a confused look that suddenly disappeared. “You’re trying to take off my…?” he trailed off, amusement clear on his face. “It’s a Hollow mask. You can’t take it off, it’s permanent, a part of me. Don’t you know that?”

Ichigo felt himself blush lightly. “Well, of course I know that!” he said defensively. “It’s just that… Well, it looks like a helmet! How was I supposed to know? And how do you even wash your hair like that?”

Ulquiorra’s head was slightly turned while he watched Ichigo’s mouth, obviously not understanding much, and Ichigo felt his embarrassment retreat. He returned to his spot in the spring and sat down again. The Arrancar dealt with his hair easily: washed the hair on the right side of his head as per normal and then shampooed the hair on the left side, pushing his hand under the helmet as far as it could go and then dunked his head into the water to rinse it.

They were almost done when Ichigo noticed a little shadowy shape slithering over the sandy ground. Ulquiorra sensed the new presence and turned to look at a black cat that now stood at the edge of the hot spring. Ichigo suppressed a groan. Seeing the lack of reaction from Ichigo, Ulquiorra ignored the cat, continuing to rinse his hair.

“I thought I’d see how you two were doing,” Yoruichi said, sitting back on her hind legs, her tail coming round to wind around her front paws. She cast an appreciative look at Ulquiorra’s chest and her gaze slid down his stomach, down to where the white alabaster skin met water. Definitely content with what she saw or imagined, her eyes rose back to the Arrancar’s face to see a questioningly raised eyebrow.

With a soft laugh, the cat slid into the warm water and swam deeper into the pool. Yoruichi swam around, the small black paws paddling through the water rapidly. She found a nice spot and settled there.

Ichigo started at the loud booming sound of Yoruichi’s transformation. He and Ulquiorra stared at her bare shoulders above the water. Most of her chest was visible, the water masterfully covering the darker nipples. She grinned at them and Ichigo turned away. He muttered under his breath indignantly. Ulquiorra, however, curiously investigated the blurred reflection under the water. A few seconds later, he turned around and went to the edge of the water where the toiletries were. He grabbed a towel and threw it at Yoruichi.

“I was told these were here for a reason,” he said. Yoruichi raised her hands to catch it, her breasts rising up from water. “Must have been this reason,” he continued, amused but pleased by the sight.

To his horror, Ichigo realized that Ulquiorra was flirting back. The concept was so foreign to him that for a few seconds he just stared at Ulquiorra blankly. He couldn’t even begin to fathom what he would do if they decided they needed some time alone. Could an Arrancar even be interested in a Shinigami? What he was supposed to tell Kisuke? What was Yoruichi doing here anyway? And what was… 

“What are you doing?” Yoruichi asked when Ichigo dunked his head under the water and didn’t resurface for a while. “Hey,” she said, smacking the back of his head. “Are you trying to drown yourself?”

Ichigo raised his head out of the water to glare at her but quickly averted his eyes from the two lulling mounds in front of his face. She was going to be the death of him; absolutely shameless. And he wasn’t even a shy fifteen-year-old anymore. What was she thinking? Then Ichigo heard the faint sound of footsteps and saw Ulquiorra walking away from the hot spring, already dressed. Ichigo went after him, wading through the water in big steps. He hesitated only a moment then, without looking back, threw his Shinigami robe over his shoulder. Rushing, he peeled the wet towel off his waist and started dressing.

Disappointed, Yoruichi watched them go. Just as Kisuke had said, the Arrancar was a very interesting specimen. There was something about him that piqued her curiosity. With a sigh, she left the hot spring and took the towel that Ichigo had left her; the red-head wasn’t as fun as he had been back in the day. After wringing her hair off, she wrapped the towel around herself and turned towards the exit. 

“So did you have fun?” Kisuke asked when he saw Ichigo and Ulquiorra walking back into the living room. Ulquiorra frowned then turned to look at Ichigo, who then jotted down the question for him.

“Yes,” Ulquiorra said with a nod. He pointed at Ichigo. “He almost tore my head off.”

Ichigo sputtered. “I did not! I was just trying to wash his damn hair!”

“And then we saw another one with big…feet.”

Closing his mouth, Ichigo turned to look at Ulquiorra, but the Arrancar was already walking towards the machine. “Anything interesting?” he asked Kisuke, giving him a questioning look.

“He looks much livelier,” the former captain noted to Ichigo.

“Yeah,” Ichigo agreed bitterly, “revived by big feet.”

They sat down at the table again. Kisuke arranged the papers from the machine on the table while Ichigo pulled out the notebook and pen to record the most important facts for the Arrancar. The soak in the spring had made Ulquiorra hungry, and he opened the box with the cake again.

“According to the data, his vision should already be back to normal,” Kisuke said. “Ask him if he has any complaints about it.”

Ulquiorra didn’t, and Kisuke leafed through the documents, finding another one. “His internal organs are healing nicely, tissues growing back,” he summed up. “At this rate, he should make a complete recovery in three to five days, including his hearing. It will, however, take more time to recover his normal body weight and energy levels.” He stopped to wait for Ichigo to catch up to him. Ulquiorra read the notes and nodded, then shoveled more cake into his mouth.

“So he can’t transform yet?”

Kisuke gave Ichigo a look. “If he tries to undergo any of his transformations, he’ll either faint or self-destruct; he doesn’t have the energy for that.”

“I see,” Ichigo muttered. He wrote this down and showed it to Ulquiorra. The Arrancar didn’t react to the information in any way. It was obvious that he had already known this.

The three of them turned to the door to see Yoruichi enter. She was still wrapped in a towel. She walked over to the table in silence. Still eating cake, Ulquiorra pulled the bra out from under the table with his other hand and held it out for her.

“Thank you,” Yoruichi said, taking it. She kneeled in front of the table to look for the rest of her clothes. She seemed to be missing a piece. She raised her head to follow the Arrancar’s hand, which was pointing to Kisuke’s pocket.

Both Ulquiorra and Ichigo watched the panties exchange hands. There was something absurd about the situation and Ichigo just sat and stared, pretending it wasn’t happening. Yoruichi and Kisuke’s relationship was a strange one. He would have expected them to have married decades, maybe centuries ago, yet somehow it didn’t work. Was it because of the incredibly long terms, and with great spiritual power, never-ending terms? Humans, spurred by their short lifespan, were like hamsters in their spinning wheels: they went to school, graduated, found jobs, married, had children, and died. Ichigo realized that he didn’t know much about these matters in Soul Society. They had schools, they had jobs. But did they even need to reproduce when they knew they would just be born again on Earth if they died? He, however, had seen children. Byakuya Kuchiki had been married, too. For how long, Ichigo had never asked. It wasn’t his business.

“Alright,” Kisuke said, clearing his throat when Yoruichi left. “So where did we leave off?”

“At him not being able to use his transformations,” Ichigo said, the trail of his thoughts scattering but not disappearing completely.

With the fan, the former captain pushed his striped hat away from his eyes and leafed through the data again. He stopped at one particular page and tapped on a row of numbers there. “Did you bring the Shinigami robe he was wearing when you first found him?”

“Huh? No, I thought you didn’t need it anymore.”

Kisuke’s finger brushed over the numbers again. “Bring it with you next time. I’d like to take a closer look at it.”

Ichigo nodded. “Alright. So, is there anything else you found out?”

The former captain delved into the documents again, but then shook his head. “No, that’s probably it. Just let nature take its course.” Ichigo gave him a funny look; it seemed as if he was about to say something. Kisuke waited, but Ichigo just shook his head.

ooOoOoOoo

“What should I do with this?”

With a toothbrush between his teeth, Ichigo looked at the Shinigami robe in Yuzu’s hands. It was Saturday, the laundry day. Yuzu was obviously having difficulty seeing the robe, as she was holding it uncertainly, as if it might disappear at any second.

“Just leave it,” Ichigo said. “You can’t wash it using water from here.” He took it from Yuzu, lifting it in the air with his free hand. The red-head turned it this way and that, inspecting. It was a common Shinigami robe that could be seen anywhere in Seireitei. There was nothing distinctive about either the design or fabric. It also seemed to be relatively clean, aside from the faint smell of blood. Wondering why Kisuke seemed so interested in it, Ichigo dropped it into the corner.

It was almost eleven in the morning but Ulquiorra was still asleep, just as Kisuke had said. Using the opportunity, Ichigo went to Yuzu’s room to use the computer and download the syllabus for his philosophy lectures. He printed it out and started reading, underlining what he considered most important. In about an hour he went to the kitchen to make himself some tea. Ulquiorra was already there, sitting in his usual place, the empty lunch box in front of him. Ichigo found that he was unpleasantly surprised. The notebook was on the table on Ulquiorra’s right, and Ichigo could see that the front page was filled with Yuzu’s neat writing. During the last few months, it had become easier for her to see spiritual beings and objects, but it still had to be difficult to talk to someone you could barely see. 

“Good morning,” Ichigo said, walking towards the kettle. Ulquiorra answered the greeting with a nod. His surprise and awkwardness must have shown on his face, because Ulquiorra’s emerald eyes followed him as he set the kettle to boil, took a mug out, and carried out other small actions until he brought the tea to the table. 

A house with two defenseless girls had been the worst possible choice to keep an Arrancar. Ichigo wasn’t certain he trusted Ulquiorra to this extent. Every time he saw Ulquiorra interact with his sisters, his whole body tensed. Subconsciously, he knew that Ulquiorra wasn’t interested in them enough to harm them, but there was more to that. Ulquiorra was a Hollow, and was obviously not in full control of his instincts.

His father was going to kill them both.

Ulquiorra blinked when Ichigo slammed his forehead against the table. “What are you doing?”

Ichigo didn’t say anything. He lifted his head and let out a reverberating sigh. Shaking his head, he took the mug and leaned back in the chair. Just as he was about to take a sip, the doorbell rang. A few moments later Yuzu shouted to tell him that it was Uryu. Ichigo left his tea and went to the corridor to greet him.

Uryu was taking his shoes off. “I just thought I’d drop by to see if he hasn’t killed you yet,” he said.

Ichigo rolled his eyes. Orihime had already announced the news just as he had known she would. She had probably even asked them to take care of Ulquiorra.

“Why isn’t he dead?” the Quincy demanded. “Do you know how dangerous he is?”

“Of course, I know,” Ichigo shot back. “He nearly killed me back then.”

“Yeah, that’s what I’m saying.”

“He did save your life, though,” the red-head pointed out.

“Only because it was convenient for him.”

“You know,” Ichigo said, refusing to give up, “instead of my horn, he could’ve taken my head off.”

“He missed?”

With an indignant grunt, Ichigo led him to the kitchen and motioned for the Quincy to sit down at the table. Ulquiorra’s thick eyebrows furrowed at the sight of Uryu before he remembered him.

“Do all of your friends know that I’m here?”

“I think they do now,” Ichigo said with a nod while fixing another mug of tea. He motioned to the notebook next to Ulquiorra’s right hand. “He can’t hear but you can talk to him using that,” he told Uryu. “Kisuke says his hearing should be back to normal in a few days.”

“Oh, joy.”

Ichigo turned to glare at the Quincy. “What’s your problem?” He shook his head when Uryu pointed at Ulquiorra. “Just drink your tea and go home. We’re doing fine, don’t worry.”

“It’s not you I’m worried about.”

“Well, yeah,” Ichigo said, carrying the mug to the table. He set it down in front of Uryu. “But I can’t just…”

The Quincy nodded. “I know.” He took the mug and blew at his hot tea. Staring at Ulquiorra, he took a careful sip and lowered the mug; it was still too hot. Ichigo couldn’t just leave him. Ichigo couldn’t leave anyone who needed help and it was obvious that Ulquiorra did.

“What happened to him?” Uryu asked.

Ichigo gave Ulquiorra a sideways look; he was staring stubbornly at his empty lunchbox. “A lot of things,” he said, starting a conversation that would last about half an hour. 

When they finished talking, their tea had gone cold. Ichigo wanted to tell Uryu about his decision to stop Mayuri, it hung on the tip on his tongue, tempting him. Nonetheless, he squashed the desire down – there was no need to drag anyone else into what might end in disaster.

Deep in thought, Uryu tapped the side of his half-empty mug with a teaspoon. A funny expression crossed Ulquiorra’s face, and Ichigo turned to him questioningly. The Arrancar lowered his head to stare at Uryu’s mug.

“Can you hear it?” Ichigo asked. He took the spoon from Uryu and banged it against the mug again, louder this time.

The sound that reached Ulquiorra’s ears was faint, booming as if it were coming from somewhere deep underwater. It was shaky as well, disappearing and appearing then breaking off again. He watched Ichigo’s hand thump the spoon against the mug again. He could definitely hear something.

Ichigo exhaled in relief when Ulquiorra nodded.

“Hurray, he’s one step closer to killing us all!” Kon rejoiced sarcastically, jumping into the free chair next to Ichigo and waving his paws enthusiastically.

Ichigo turned to whack the spoon against Kon’s soft forehead. With a yelp, the Modified Soul fell back to the floor.

“That hurt!” he complained, standing up. He rubbed his forehead with his paw. “You’re so violent!”

“I’ll be even more violent if you don’t shut up,” Ichigo threatened. With an encouraging look to the Arrancar, he lowered his weapon next to Uryu’s mug. 

Ulquiorra took the teaspoon again and banged it against the mug. He could definitely hear it. He banged it again.

“Alright, I’m off before I go deaf,” Uryu said, standing up. “Thanks for the tea.”

“Don’t leave me alone with these two!” Kon cried, rushing after Uryu.

TBC


	7. Part 7

**The Heart in My Hand**

by chayron (lttomb@yahoo.com), beta-read by Ash

Part 7

After Uryu left, Ichigo finished his cold tea and went upstairs to his room to study. Ulquiorra lingered in the kitchen before he followed him and settled on the red-head’s currently free bed. The previous night he had slept on the futon. Ichigo had insisted he take the bed but he had strictly refused.

Soon only the rustle of paper and Ulquiorra’s rhythmical breathing were heard. Ichigo swiveled sideways in his chair to see the Arrancar asleep. Ulquiorra was lying on his side, facing the window, with his back to Ichigo. It was strange to see him sleep so peacefully. Ichigo scratched the back of his head with his pencil and returned to his studies.

About two hours later, Ichigo realized that he was more interested in drawing spiky cactuses along the corners of the pages than studying and put the printouts away. He left the room and jogged downstairs to search for a snack. He delved deep into the fridge.

“There’s some chicken on the top shelf,” Yuzu informed her brother, approaching him. “Are you going to Kisuke’s today?” she asked, waiting for him to fish out the plate of chicken. Putting it on the sideboard cabinet, Ichigo nodded. Yuzu closed the door and peeled a sticky note off the fridge. “Here,” she held it out to Ichigo. “This is a shopping list for dinner.”

Ichigo took it with his left hand and inspected the products on the list. He yelped in surprise when Yuzu slapped his right hand.

“What?” he asked, refusing to let go of the chicken wing he had claimed.

“Warm it up first,” she said, slapping his hand again. She stubbornly kept slapping it until he dropped the wing back into the plate. She quickly swept the plate off the cabinet and put it into the microwave. Then she heard the click indicating that the washing machine had unlocked its door, and went to the laundry room.

Ichigo glanced at the microwave where his food was rotating happily, inspected the list again, put it into his pocket, and pushed the stop button. He carried the plate to the table and sat down. The chicken was barely warm.

The red-head was half-way through the chicken when he heard the door open. Ulquiorra wandered into the kitchen, saw him, stopped, then continued towards the couch further away and sat down. Feeling guilty, Ichigo finished the chicken leg he had been eating in a few bites and carried the rest of the chicken back to the fridge. He washed his hands and walked over to Ulquiorra. He pointed to the Arrancar’s pocket and was rewarded with the notebook and pen. With a few sentences he informed the Arrancar of their impending daily visit to Kisuke and grocery shopping. Both were met neutrally.

“Will you go like this?” Ulquiorra asked, meaning Ichigo’s Human body.

“Well, yeah, I’ll need to go shopping later,” Ichigo repeated.

Ulquiorra didn’t say anything to that. He stood up and went to the door. Ichigo went to the bathroom to tell Yuzu that they were leaving. He was almost out of the bathroom when he saw the Shinigami robe that he had tossed into the corner earlier. He picked up the robe and rolled it into a bundle.

Ichigo was putting his shoes on when Ulquiorra took note of the robe next to him on the floor. He reached down and picked it up. Ulquiorra’s fingers squeezed the fabric curiously. There was something very familiar about the robe and the familiarity extended beyond him having worn it once. 

“Kisuke asked me to take it with us next time we went to see him,” Ichigo explained. He finished putting his shoes on and straightened.

“Oh.”

The Arrancar turned the robe around in his hands a few times. It was giving Ulquiorra a very distinctive feeling but he couldn’t quite understand why. Urahara being interested in the robe didn’t bode well.

Ichigo gasped when the robe suddenly started fading in Ulquiorra’s hands. “What?” he grunted in surprise. “Why? Where did it go?” he wondered when his fingers felt nothing but air.

Ulquiorra lowered his hands. “It disappeared,” he stated the obvious. 

Ichigo waited for an explanation but it never came. Instead, Ulquiorra picked up the empty lunch box and opened the door, stepping outside.

“You can’t carry that,” Ichigo said, taking the box from him.

The approximate forty minutes’ walk through the city from Ichigo’s house to Urahara Shop passed without incident. At first they had received a few astonished looks but then Ichigo realized that it was because of the notebook and pen in Ulquiorra’s pockets that seemed to just float in the air. He took those from the Arrancar and the problem was solved. As usual, when he was in his body, it took them much longer to reach Urahara Shop. Ulquiorra must have ascertained himself again that the Human body was a real nuisance.

When they arrived, Kisuke was talking to a customer and motioned for them to proceed further into the house. The conversation was taking some time and, bored, Ichigo started browsing through the wares on display. Ulquiorra wandered off to the back of the house. Soon, he returned to get his notebook and pen back from Ichigo and disappeared again.

“Sorry, sorry,” Kisuke said nearly half an hour later. He swept past the showcases, his face radiating happiness. “I’ve just sold a hundred good luck charms for the festival in July.”

“Congratulations,” Ichigo said, lowering what looked like a cudgel with holes drilled into it back to its place; he couldn’t even begin to fathom what it was meant for. “And we, as usual, came here for the food.”

“Ah, right,” the former captain said. He started walking towards the living room. “Ururu has two boxes ready.”

“I don’t think that’s enough,” Ichigo said, following Kisuke. “I think he’s always hungry. That’s dangerous and not really humane.”

“He’s a Hollow – we don’t need to be humane,” Kisuke said, sitting down at the table. “You don’t need to worry about it.”

Ichigo gave Kisuke a reproachful look. “But what about the ‘dangerous’ part? And while we’re still on this topic, you’re not Human either,” he pointed out.

“Well, yes,” Kisuke agreed easily. “Anyway, soon this won’t be a problem.”

“I hope so,” the red-head muttered, sitting down as well.

Kisuke drew his fan and waved it leisurely. “So have you brought that robe he was wearing?”

Ichigo scratched the back of his head sheepishly. “Um…not exactly.”

The former captain cocked his head, wondering. “Is that a yes or a no?”

“Well, I was going to bring it but it disappeared,” Ichigo said.

Kisuke’s fan stopped in surprise. “Disappeared? What do you mean? You lost it? Tore it? Burned it?” he offered.

“No, it just…” Ichigo shrugged. “Ulquiorra took it and it disappeared.” A strange expression crossed Kisuke’s face, making Ichigo wonder what exactly this was about.

“Ah,” Kisuke finally said. His fan started moving again. “He absorbed the spirit particles,” he concluded.

Ichigo was frowning, giving him a confused look. “You can do that?”

“Not normally,” Kisuke said with a shrug. “It’s more within a Quincy’s expertise. Well, it doesn’t matter. Any other news?”

Ichigo’s face brightened. “His hearing is returning. He can’t hear normal speech yet, only certain sound frequencies, but it’s really getting better.”

Kisuke nodded. “I told you it would.” The fast healing process was astonishing, though, and he couldn’t help but be impressed. He could definitely see why Mayuri had taken such a keen interest in Ulquiorra. In fact, he was no less interested in Ulquiorra than Mayuri, but mentioning this to Ulquiorra or Ichigo would have disastrous consequences. Maybe later, when all of this calmed down.

“Oh, right,” Ichigo said. “Just a few hours ago I received a visit from Uryu.”

“And?”

“And nothing, actually. He just made sure that we were still alive and left.”

Kisuke chuckled. “Sounds like Ishida. And where did Ulquiorra go?” he asked, motioning with his fan at the door.

Ichigo shrugged dismissively. “Must be continuing to mark his territory.” He leaned back, sighing, putting his hands on the floor behind his back to support himself. “I’m still conflicted about him staying at my place. If I was alone, it would be okay, but there’re my sisters and…” he let out another meaningful sigh, not finishing.

Kisuke’s face acquired an expression of concern. “Did he do anything?”

Ichigo shook his head. “No, he didn’t. I really don’t think he will either, but… Well, you know.”

“If you’re worried about that time when he nearly attacked you, it shouldn’t happen again,” Kisuke said. He could see that Ichigo felt uncomfortable mentioning it. “Besides, it is very likely that after Isshin returns, you won’t even need to worry about him staying at your house.”

Ichigo groaned, “Don’t even remind me… He’ll toss both of us out.” The truth, however, was that Isshin wouldn’t. He would just be disappointed and upset, which was much worse in Ichigo’s mind. The red-head pointed at Kisuke’s chest. “In that case, you’ll have to take him in.”

Kisuke shrugged. “I don’t really mind, but I don’t think he’ll agree to that.”

Ichigo grunted in realization. That was true – he did get the impression that Ulquiorra didn’t trust the former captain very much. Maybe he would see the invitation to stay as an insult. “But he doesn’t really have anywhere else to go, does he?” he wondered.

Kisuke gave the red-head a curious look. It seemed that Ichigo had momentarily forgotten who he was talking about. “Ichigo, he’s over two hundred years old, and he’s an Arrancar. He’ll find a place to stay easily,” Kisuke said. “An average Hollow can’t even put a scratch on him no matter how weakened he is.”

Ichigo shrugged. “That may be so, but it’s not really about that, is it?”

They stared at each other until Kisuke turned his eyes away. The former captain shook his head. The younger man was too compassionate for his own good. And yet, it always worked out in his favor. 

The main interest of Ichigo and Kisuke’s conversation didn’t return for some time and they went to see what was keeping him. They found the Arrancar in the kitchen, eating something that seemed to be just off the stove. It had a very pleasant smell, too. Ururu was sitting opposite Ulquiorra, writing in the notebook. Ichigo wondered what they could be talking about but, not wanting to appear nosy or mistrustful, didn’t ask. 

When Ulquiorra finished eating, they left the shop. On their way home, they stopped at a store nearby. Before they entered, Ichigo wrote down a few instructions as to how Ulquiorra should behave in the store. Ulquiorra read them and inwardly rolled his eyes. He followed Ichigo into the store, and then kept following him for about ten minutes. Milk, beef, some carrots, four large yoghurt cups, an enormous leek, everything found its way into Ichigo’s cart.

“Put that down,” Ichigo said with an annoyed grunt when an egg carton seemingly floating in the air attracted a few customers’ attention. “I told you not to touch anything,” he admonished, snatching the carton out of the Arrancar’s hands and putting it back in its place.

“But it’s on the list,” Ulquiorra pointed out.

Huffing, Ichigo grabbed the eggs off the shelf again and wheeled the cart away. He studied the list again, but that was it – he had everything. They were approaching one of the cashier lines when Ichigo stopped abruptly, his body tense. There had just been a burst of powerful and unfamiliar energy. Ichigo looked over at Ulquiorra, whose head was turned in the direction of the source. It didn’t exactly feel like a Hollow, but could be just as or even more dangerous than one. It was a couple of kilometers away from the store, and Ichigo considered going to check it out. He was already reaching for his Substitute Shinigami Badge when the flow of energy disappeared. Surprised, Ichigo lowered his hand, not touching his badge. It had vanished just as suddenly as it had appeared, leaving no trace he could latch onto. Wondering, he pushed the cart forward. Was it a new threat or a new ally? Or was it only Kisuke experimenting with something? The former captain, though, would have definitely informed him beforehand.

When they returned home, Yuzu gave them both a lecture for being late. She instructed Ichigo to store the food she didn’t need in the fridge and surrounding cabinets, then set on making dinner. Ichigo washed and chopped the vegetables while Yuzu juggled pots and frying pans on the stove. From the mauve sofa further away, Ulquiorra watched their idyllic antics.

Karin returned from her football training at almost the same time the food was done. She jogged to her room to change her clothes then joined everyone at the table.

“Dad called,” Yuzu said while they were eating, “asked how we were doing.”

Ichigo’s hand faltered above the saltshaker and he looked over to Yuzu then his eyes turned to Ulquiorra, who was sitting next to him, finishing Ururu’s leftover cake. “And what did you tell him?” he asked.

“That we were doing fine,” Yuzu answered. “What else?”

Karin didn’t miss her brother shift uneasily in his chair. Their father was returning Monday evening, and she was interested in what his reaction to Ulquiorra would be. She barely knew anything about him – Ichigo had told her that he was an old friend who needed help, but it was only too obvious that this was a lie. They did share some strange kinship, but it seemed like they tolerated each other’s presence rather than enjoy it. Ichigo’s friends, however, seemed to know Ulquiorra from some time ago as well. She didn’t know what they thought but Kon hated the pale Arrancar and was mistrustful of him.

She couldn’t blame Kon – there was something unsettling about Ulquiorra. Even when the Arrancar was sitting at the same table as them, obliviously eating his cake, he seemed to exude some kind of inner force. 

Sitting at the table with Ichigo’s family was relaxing. Ulquiorra scooped out another forkful of cake. No one shouted; no one tried to kill each other. This particular thought made him look around in search of the Modified Soul. It was nowhere to be seen. With a blissful sigh, Ulquiorra continued eating his cake. His hearing was getting better quickly. He had finally started to hear particularly loud noises no matter how high or low the sound was.

Everyone started at the table and the Arrancar gave them a questioning look. It appeared to be the phone and Ichigo went to answer it.

“Oh, how are you?”

“Yeah, we’re fine.”

“He’s fine.”

“Of course.”

“Certainly.”

“Yeah, that’d be great.”

“Sure.”

“That’s a good idea.”

Karin and Yuzu met each other’s eyes. It was Orihime. Her and Ichigo’s conversations always sounded similar. He and Orihime started going out soon after Aizen’s defeat, after Ichigo had lost almost all of his reiatsu. It had been a very difficult time for Ichigo. He acted like he had finally accepted his fate and learnt to live with it. But the truth was that he never did. It had been a huge blow for him not to be able to watch over the people he loved, to defend them. The tables had turned and he had become the one who needed to be protected from even the weakest of Hollows. Despite the fact that he had tried not to show how affected he was, everyone had noticed that he had become withdrawn, even somewhat unstable.

Orihime had done everything in her power to help him but her attempts had been for naught. Contrary to her expectations, her efforts had not worked out in her favor as Ichigo had become even more withdrawn. It had been apparent to everyone except her that all additional concern made Ichigo feel coddled, which, in turn, made him feel even more useless. And while Ichigo was grateful for everything she had done for him, he couldn’t help but feel that she pitied him. The relationship dragged on and off for several months before they finally broke up. It had been Ichigo’s initiative since he could see that it wasn’t going to work and believed that she deserved someone much better, someone who really loved her.

Orihime stopped calling and visiting him, but occasionally she would phone his sisters to find out how he was doing. Ichigo didn’t know this, just as he didn’t know how painful it had been for her when he had finally decided to end it between them. His sisters knew it all, though. Orihime still loved Ichigo. It wasn’t clear if she expected anything anymore, but they believed that Kon was her excuse to see Ichigo. Now, with Ulquiorra here, she had one more excuse to visit their brother.

“Orihime is coming over for a visit on Monday,” Ichigo said when he returned to the table.

“Oh?” Karin said, sipping her tea.

“Yeah,” Ichigo said, nodding, “after her part-time job.”

Yuzu sighed.

ooOoOoOoo

Lazily, Ichigo rolled onto his side and grabbed his phone to check the time. It was about ten in the morning. He lowered the phone back onto the desk and, yawning, turned onto his back to lie down for a couple more minutes. Tomorrow he had to go to the university, but today was pure bliss – the Sunday morning was entirely his. He finally rolled out of the bed twenty minutes later and dressed unhurriedly. He could feel Ulquiorra moving downstairs, most likely in the kitchen. His sisters were absent, probably shopping or meeting friends or maybe both at once.

Too lazy to put on slippers, Ichigo jogged down the stairs only in socks, visited the bathroom then headed for the kitchen. He opened the door and stopped dead in his tracks, his right foot suspended in the air, his mouth open in astonishment.

There was a Hollow on the kitchen floor. It was quite large and obviously dead, small puddles of dark blood apparent under a few severed limbs. From the Hollow on the floor, Ichigo’s eyes rose to Ulquiorra, who was standing sideways to him, cooking something in a huge frying pan. Ichigo had never seen the portable stove the Arrancar was using either.

“Please tell me you aren’t making Hollow steak in my kitchen…”

Not certain what Ichigo had said, Ulquiorra turned to look at him. Since Ichigo didn’t repeat, he turned back to the stove and started turning over the large pieces of meat in the pan. They were crispy and smelled delicious. 

“You’re…” Ichigo concluded himself. “You’re seriously making a Hollow steak… Are you freaking…” In complete bewilderment, Ichigo’s hands shot into the air as if he were physically trying to grasp the absurdity of the sight. Wordlessly, he waved his hands back and forth as if he were a tree hit by a storm. “Are you freaking insane?!” he finally yelled. “What the hell are you doing?!”

Ulquiorra was taken aback by Ichigo’s vehement reaction. He could barely hear the red-head but the shouting, red face in his vision was a plain sign that something had gone wrong. He watched Ichigo gallop towards the coffee table near the sofa and grab the notebook and pen off it. Ulquiorra turned away and picked up a small bottle of spices that he had borrowed from Ururu. He sprinkled the meat with them generously then turned the pieces over and sprinkled some more.

With the notebook in hand, Ichigo walked back to Ulquiorra and held it in front of the Arrancar’s face. Ulquiorra’s eyes flew past several questions and comments. He had never seen so many exclamation marks in one place before, but he couldn’t quite grasp why Ichigo was so angry. True, he had messed up the kitchen a bit, but that seemed to be the least of Ichigo’s concerns. Instead, the red-head was livid about… Confused, Ulquiorra read the sentences on the page again.

“Then where can I cook it?” he finally asked.

Ichigo stared at him for a few seconds and lowered the notebook. “That’s not the problem!” he growled. “You can’t cook it!”

The Arrancar gave him a baffled look. “Why not?”

“Arrgh! You just can’t!” Frustrated, Ichigo tossed the notebook onto the tabletop, not far away from the newly acquired stove. He could see that he was confusing Ulquiorra, and he had the feeling that Ulquiorra was going to ask him if he was supposed to eat the Hollow raw. With a groan, Ichigo put his hands on the tabletop and lowered his head, thinking. He could hear Ulquiorra moving around, turning the stove off, and getting the plates ready.

“Will you eat?”

Ichigo banged his forehead against the tabletop but closed his mouth before he could start yelling again. He shook his head. “No, thank you.” Breathing deeply, he forced himself to calm down. 

“Where did you get all those things?” Ichigo asked a minute later.

Ulquiorra didn’t answer and Ichigo raised his head. The Arrancar hadn’t heard him, of course. He was sitting at the table, the plate with a large steak in front of him. He was cutting it into pieces already. There was no actual need to ask where he got all the utensils – Urahara Shop, probably from Ururu.

Ulquiorra started eating and Ichigo thought that this was obviously what Kisuke had meant when he told him not to worry about Ulquiorra’s meals. He shook his head.

ooOoOoOoo

There was something strange going on. Kisuke’s gaze slid from Ichigo to Ulquiorra. The two were behaving unusually. Ichigo seemed to be irritated and upset about something, while Ulquiorra had an air of confusion around him. Normally, Ichigo would have already brought up a problem.

“What happened?” Kisuke asked, curious.

Ichigo looked at the former captain and, noting that he seemed interested, pursed his lips stubbornly. He had intended to keep quiet, but since Kisuke had asked… “I come to the kitchen and, can you believe it, he,” Ichigo pointed to Ulquiorra, “has a Hollow there. The size of an elephant!”

A little concerned, Kisuke turned to Ulquiorra. “Mmm? He brought someone to your house? Was it a friend?”

“No!” Ichigo spat, irritated by Kisuke’s slowwitted question. “He was cooking it!”

“Ah.” Kisuke clapped his knee in relief. He started fanning himself. “He’s started hunting already. Very good.” His words made Ichigo look even more irritated. Kisuke wondered why it was such a big problem for him. “Did he break anything?” he asked.

“No,” Ichigo groaned. Kisuke’s reaction was very disappointing, but predictable, and he wondered why he’d even thought he would find some understanding in Kisuke. “He was cooking it! He also asked if I wanted to eat some. I think he was being serious.”

The former captain chuckled. “He probably was.” He closed his fan and sighed. “Ichigo, he’s a Hollow and he needs to eat, just like you need to eat. You eat pigs and cows, he eats other Hollows. It’s common sense. The only surprising thing about this,” he continued, “is that he wanted to share his meal with you. As I’ve said before, Hollows aren’t known to share their meals.”

“I’m not a Hollow,” Ulquiorra stated suddenly, growing weary of seeing “Hollow” again and again on their lips.

Kisuke gave him an amused look. He doubted Ulquiorra himself knew who he was anymore. He turned back to Ichigo, who was mulling over his words. “If you tell him not to eat other Hollows, he won’t understand.”

“I could at least tell him not to eat them in the house,” Ichigo muttered.

“Um…”

“Yeah, right, I can’t,” Ichigo grunted. “The sight of him barbecuing a Hollow in the garden would be even more disturbing.”

“If we’re talking about barbecues, I’ve got a very good barbecue grill,” Kisuke said excitedly. “It’s hardly ever been used. Only thirty thousand yen.”

Ichigo gave him a hard stare.

“Twenty-five, then?”

“What are you talking about?” Ulquiorra asked, intrigued by Ichigo’s unusual facial expressions.

Ichigo held out his hand for the notebook, then changed his mind and retracted it. The last thing he needed was for Ulquiorra to decide that he wanted a barbecue.

“Why didn’t the Hollow disappear after Ulquiorra killed it? They normally do when I kill them.”

The former captain nodded in agreement. “They disappear when killed with a Shinigami’s Zanpakuto. Ulquiorra doesn’t have one, though. So, how about that barbecue?”

“Just leave it!”

“Alright,” the former captain said when it was clear that Ichigo wasn’t going to buy anything from him. “Did you feel that strange reiatsu yesterday? I think it appeared soon after you’d left.”

Ichigo nodded. “Yeah, I thought that maybe it was you experimenting.”

“No, I thought you or Ulquiorra would know more about it. It disappeared very quickly and I didn’t have time to find out what or who it was.”

The red-head shrugged. He turned to Ulquiorra and wrote down the question for him. Ulquiorra didn’t know what it had been either.

“It did feel somewhat like a Fullbringer,” Ichigo muttered thoughtfully. The idea was unpleasant, disturbing even. He didn’t want to have anything to do with them.

Kisuke nodded. “That’s what I thought as well. It might, however, just be a Hollow with unusual reiatsu.”

With a grunt, Ichigo looked at Ulquiorra. In general, it sounded like Ulquiorra’s dessert was on the loose.

TBC


	8. Part 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach – it belongs to its respective owners. This fan fiction is not a commercial project, and I am not making any money from writing it.  
> Warnings:   
> 1\. Yaoi (male x male). Ulquiorra x Ichigo and vice versa. Other pairings?   
> 2\. Ichigo – almost 19 years old; Ulquiorra – probably a few hundred as a Hollow and about a decade or so as an Arrancar?  
> 3\. Post anime (haven’t read the manga).   
> 4\. Alternate Universe.  
> 5\. I’m not a native speaker, thus expect various language oddities.  
> 6\. I’m not very familiar with all the details in the anime, and I am also new to Bleach fandom, so I will be straying away from the canon quite frequently. I do my research but Bleach is a vast universe that is not so easy to grasp. I must admit, though, that there are also things in the anime that don’t make sense to me and I take the liberty of recreating certain parts of this universe as I see fit.

**The Heart in My Hand**

by chayron (lttomb@yahoo.com), beta-read by Ash

Part 8

When Ichigo woke up, his sisters were already gone, on their way to school. He dressed and went downstairs. The kitchen smelled like sandwiches and butter. He opened the fridge and found a plate of sandwiches. On the lowest shelf, there were also several bundles wrapped in dark clothing. Two bundles were missing. Grimacing, Ichigo closed the fridge. He never would have expected that he would keep a Hollow carcass in his fridge.

Still frowning, the red-head turned the kettle on and carried the plate of sandwiches to the table. The most interesting thing was that his sisters didn’t mind. They had said that this was better than having Ulquiorra try and find something edible again. He knew they were right.

It all felt surreal. Ichigo chewed his sandwich numbly. He still had some time until the start of his first lecture. Neither father nor Orihime were coming before 6pm, and he was positive that by that time he would already be home. Leaving Ulquiorra alone in the house bothered him somewhat, but he had to opt out taking him to Kisuke’s since he had the feeling that Ulquiorra would simply leave.

Ichigo turned his head towards the door, where Kon appeared. The plush bear stretched its arms and yawned. It crossed the kitchen and hopped onto the chair next to Ichigo. 

“Where were you yesterday?” the red-head asked. The kettle started whistling and he got up to make himself some tea. “I didn’t see you.”

Kon grinned slyly. “That’s my little secret.”

Ichigo poured himself some tea and carried it to the table. He sat down and continued eating his sandwiches. Seeing that the red-head paid no heed to his words, Kon squirmed. Didn’t Ichigo want to know?

“I came back today.”

“Mhm.”

“In the morning, a few minutes ago.”

“Yeah.”

“Since you’re so curious about where I’ve been, I’ll tell you,” Kon chirped excitedly. “I was waiting for my princess in the train station. And then I spent the night in her room!”

“Awesome,” Ichigo said. He lifted the teacup and blew at it to cool his tea. At this rate, he was going to be late. “Did she hug you like she hugs the giraffe she always sleeps with?”

“Screw you!” Kon yelled, pointing at him with a stuffed paw. “Our love transcends all material boundaries!”

“Of course, it does,” Ichigo agreed. “All logical boundaries, too.”

“You’re jealous!”

“And you’re so deep in the friend zone that I can’t even see your ears,” Ichigo said, snatching up Kon by the ear and standing up. With Kon trapped under his arm, he ran upstairs to his room to grab his bag. Awakened, Ulquiorra gave them a discontent look then fell back asleep. Stuffing Kon into his bag, Ichigo ran back downstairs and into the kitchen where he grabbed his tea and tried to empty the cup in a few big gulps. He nearly scalded his throat.

Cursing, with his tongue lolling out and tears in his eyes, Ichigo ran out of the house and towards the train station. At full speed, he crossed a few streets and was just in time to catch the train. Breathless, the red-head jumped inside. He took an empty seat near the window, lowered the bag onto his knees, and pulled his phone out. He fished his earphones out from the side pocket.

To get to Kagamino University, he had to take the train and travel east for about thirty minutes to Kagamino City, then walk for about fifteen minutes to reach the building itself. Today he didn’t have the first lecture, so he had been able to sleep in; normally, he had to get up at about the same time as his sisters.

In about half an hour they reached their destination and Ichigo felt Kon moving around in the bag, trying to get more comfortable. He thought that maybe he should have left the Modified Soul at home to watch over Ulquiorra. There was, however, the matter of the strange reiatsu everyone had felt two days ago and then, knowing how Kon and Ulquiorra worked on each other’s nerves, it was probably a good thing that Kon was with him. 

Things had been relatively peaceful lately, with only one or two stray Hollow attacks per week that usually were taken care of by Thirteenth or Tenth Divisions, and Ichigo had time to make a few friends at University. When he entered the lecture hall, he was met with friendly greetings.

“So where did you go on Friday?” a big, tall guy named Timothy asked, motioning to the free seat next to him. 

Ichigo approached him and lowered his bag onto the empty seat. Timothy was a large guy, on the brink of being called fat. He wore glasses and was a studious type that reminded Ichigo of Uryu. That, however, was the only thing that he had in common with Uryu, since, when it came to perversity, Timothy was the type of a guy that could put Kon to shame. There was something strange about Timothy’s name too, but that obviously had something to do with his foreign heritage and blond hair, and Ichigo never pried into it.

“My sister was sick and there was no one else to take care of her,” Ichigo explained.

“Is she hot?”

“She’s underage, you twit. And I’d rather have…”

“Yo, Ichi!”

Ichigo turned his head to answer the enthusiastic greeting from a short freshman with chestnut-colored hair. “Hello, Akio.” 

“Why were you absent on Friday?” Akio asked. “I thought we agreed on karaoke.”

“He says his sister was sick,” Timothy explained, turning sideways and leaning against the windowsill. He crossed his arms. “There will be no excuses today.”

“Ahh…” Ichigo drawled, thinking frantically.

“Oo, look who’s here,” Timothy whispered. Ichigo and Akio turned to see Mizuka entering the auditorium. She greeted the people at the door then went to her usual group of friends. “We’ve definitely got to invite her!” Timothy demanded.

Ichigo felt his scalp burning from intent stares and turned back to his friends. “Why are you looking at me?”

“What do you mean ‘why’?” Akio sputtered. “You promised us you’d invite her!”

“I did? Really?”

The enthusiastically repetitive nod of Timothy’s head for yes didn’t entirely convince Ichigo, but he thought that he just might have during one of their drunken outings. The problem with his friends was that while they constantly talked about girls, the two were scaredy-cats when it came to real interaction. Last time Akio tried to invite one of the freshmen from another group, he ended up blushing and stammering and, instead, asked her what time it was.

“Look at that majestic chest,” Timothy babbled in ecstasy. 

“Stop staring at her like that,” Akio admonished. “She’ll never go anywhere with us if she notices!”

Ichigo was almost certain that she would find an excuse not to hang out with them anyway, but, in case of a miracle, he needed to find two more girls. The lecture was about to start and he lifted his bag off the seat, sitting down. He scanned the hall and was quickly rewarded with the sight of two girls at the front of the auditorium. They didn’t boast of majestic accessories like Mizuka, but they seemed to be more down to earth and were probably going to be much easier to convince to go to karaoke than her.

“How about them?” Ichigo whispered, discreetly pointing at the girls. “Those two at the front.”

Timothy squinted and took off his glasses to clean them with his shirt, then put them back on and took another look. He seemed to be quite disappointed, but Akio nodded.

“Yeah, I think Hisako is attractive in her own way,” he agreed. “And she always lends her notes to me. What’s the name of the other one?”

“Fumiko,” Timothy said mournfully. “Two weeks ago, I invited her to have lunch with me in the cafeteria and she refused.”

Ichigo gave his friend a surprised look. “Why I haven’t heard anything about that?” he wondered. This seemed like a case of a bitter crush. Timothy never told him about this since he had obviously felt embarrassed. Maybe that was why he had been acting like a douche recently.

“Did she tell you why?” Akio questioned, interested.

Timothy rolled his eyes. “Oh, yes. She said something about her cat having had kitties at night and that she couldn’t look at food.”

“You know,” Akio said, “that might have been the truth.”

Ichigo gave him a skeptical look. 

Timothy snorted. “Yeah, or maybe aliens kidnapped her grandmother and she had to rush to save her.”

“A Hollow would be more likely.”

“A what?”

“Never mind,” Ichigo said. The professor entered the hall and he straightened in his seat while trying to find a notebook in his bag. “I’ll talk to them after the lecture.”

\- - - 

To Ichigo’s surprise, Mizuka appeared to be quite interested in the small karaoke party of theirs. That was until Ichigo pointed at Akio and Timothy standing further away, eagerly awaiting the outcome of the conversation. Her face fell a little, she turned to look at her friends, and suddenly it appeared that they all had very busy schedules for today, the rest of the month and probably next year too. Ichigo was smart enough not to ask her what they entailed.

When Mizuka, surrounded by her three giggling and chattering friends, left, Ichigo cast a regretful look to the guys. He didn’t blame Mizuka or her friends. If he were a girl and saw those hungry and fervent expressions on the guys’ faces, he’d have doubts too.

“Compose yourself!” Ichigo hissed. “Don’t look so desperate!”

“Easy for you to say!” Timothy grunted. “You’ve been having fun with that Ori…” He fell silent when Akio elbowed him. “Right,” Timothy said. “Don’t look desperate. Got it.” He turned to Akio. “What about now? Less desperate?”

“Now you look like you gotta go to the bathroom.”

Ichigo rolled his eyes at both Timothy’s antics and their pitiful attempts not to hurt his feelings. He had never told them about his past relationship with Orihime, but somehow they had found out. They also knew that their love story didn’t have a fairy tale ending, had never even come close.

“Well?” Akio asked, turning around to look at the other two girls, who were their backup plan. “Should we try a more realistic approach to our karaoke problem?”

“We should have gone for this kind of approach from the start,” Ichigo said.

“At least we tried,” Timothy said with mournful bitterness. 

This time, since Fumiko and Hisako looked less intimidating and more approachable, they all went to talk to the girls. To Timothy’s honest surprise, the girls appeared to be free this afternoon and gladly agreed to go right after the lectures. Giddy with excitement, Akio nudged Ichigo in the side.

“We’re still missing one,” Timothy said when they returned to their desks.

“Oh, I can just go home,” Ichigo said. Tonight was going to be spiced with his father’s return and Orihime’s visit. He still had no idea how he was going to explain to his father that there was a fugitive Arrancar staying with them.

“No way,” Akio protested. “You’re coming with us!”

“Ugh.” Ichigo frowned. “Why are you so insistent?”

“Umm…” a shy feminine voice interrupted them. “I couldn’t help overhearing your conversation. Err…”

The three of them turned to their right. It was Kana, a quiet girl who was mostly invisible in their group. She had just recently joined the group and wasn’t quite able to fit into any of the already formed social circles.

“Umm…” Kana hummed, her embarrassment obvious. “I see you’re missing one person. I wouldn’t mind going.”

“Sure,” Ichigo said at once. “Right after the lectures.” He couldn’t help but smile at the way her eyes lit up with excitement.

“Way to go!” Timothy saluted Ichigo with an imaginary glass when they sat back down at their desks.

Ichigo wondered why he had agreed so readily. Maybe it was because she had seemed enthusiastic, courageous and a bit pitiful all at once? Or maybe it was due to the dread of going home and facing the mess in the evening.

\- - - 

Ichigo and his friends had decided that they’d be most comfortable in a familiar environment and chose the karaoke café that they usually went to. Kana seemed to get along with the other two girls and Ichigo thought that he had made the right decision – if nothing else, she would at least make two friends. They rented a karaoke box for one hour and soon were sitting down at the table, soft music playing in the background.

After the excitement over the food they were eating and the helpful exchange of today’s weather reports, the conversation dried up. Everyone looked at each other, squirmed uncomfortably and looked back at their food. Ichigo smiled at Kana, intending to ask where she lived and why she had come to study at Kagamino University. 

“So how’s your cat?” Timothy asked.

Startled, Ichigo looked at Fumiko. Timothy, obviously, couldn’t let it go. Ichigo sipped his strawberry milkshake to hide his frown.

“She’s already fine,” Fumiko said, smiling. “The first few days were rough, but now she and the kittens are great.”

Hisako chuckled. “She took that cat off the street and it came with a surprise.”

“Ugh,” Timothy grunted awkwardly. “That’s great. I mean that she and the kittens are fine.” He gave an apologetic look to Ichigo, who glared at him.

“Umm…” Fumiko drawled, embarrassed. “Do any of you need a kitten? They’re still little and we’ve already found a home for two of them, but I have my hands full with the other three. I really can’t keep more than one cat.”

Timothy and Akio met each other’s eyes and their gazes drifted to Ichigo. To their surprise, it seemed that the red-head was actually considering the offer. 

“Mmm…” Ichigo drawled. Yuzu had been talking about a cat for a few months now. It would be nice to have a pet. Even if Yuzu had to leave for a university or college far away from home someday, his dad could take care of the cat – he would probably feel less lonely that way. Ichigo wasn’t certain what his dad’s opinion on cats was, though; he seemed more like a dog person. Or maybe the cat would never live that long and, if it did, maybe Yuzu would have the option of taking it with her.

“We live pretty close to the street, though,” Ichigo said uncertainly.

Akio rolled his eyes. “If two cars pass that road per day, it’s considered heavy traffic.” He was giving Ichigo all possible signs with his eyes and mouth that it would be very bad idea to refuse a kitten when this could be a perfect excuse for Timothy and Fumiko to occasionally meet at Ichigo’s house.

“Well, I’ll ask my sister first,” Ichigo said. “Maybe she’s already changed her mind.”

The talk about kittens warmed up the atmosphere considerably. Timothy soon expressed a wish to see them, and it was agreed that they would all go to Fumiko’s to help Ichigo pick out a kitten. Ichigo’s meek protests about not being certain that he was really getting a kitten were ignored.

Akio had a pretty good voice when it came to singing. Soon he was joined by Hisako and the two of them sang a few songs in a row. Ichigo had to agree that, alone, Akio had sounded better. Opposite the table, Kana laughed softly and Ichigo understood that his verdict was clearly displayed on his grimacing face.

“It’s not that bad,” she whispered.

“No, it’s not,” Ichigo agreed. “Wait till you hear _me_ sing.”

“I’m no good at singing either.”

The red-head laughed. “That’s a relief – then I don’t need to worry much about making a bad impression.”

Kana chuckled and turned back to Akio and Hisako. She still looked somewhat tense, though. She probably wasn’t used to hanging out with friends like this. Secretly, Ichigo gave Kana a closer look. He was by no means an expert in women’s appearances or clothing, but even he could tell that, at first glance, she looked quite plain. Shoulder-length black hair, oval face, blue jeans and a white and black blouse attracted no attention. She was quite tall, though, and there was something appealing about her perceptive brown eyes.

Ichigo had to wait to demonstrate his singing skills because Timothy took the scene next. Urged by the girls, he chose a romantic song. It required a high-pitched voice, and Timothy didn’t have that. He tortured the song from beginning to end until he finally killed it with a bout of coughing. Dying with laughter, the girls applauded him loudly. Bowing left and right, Timothy returned to the table and soothed his raw throat with apple juice.

“How about we give it a go?” Ichigo asked Kana, motioning to the microphones.

They found a song that they both were familiar with and started singing. The first few lines showed that Kana wasn’t as bad as she had said she was. Ichigo let her sing and only joined in during the chorus.

“Perfect,” Timothy said when they took their places back at the table. “Would have been even better if you didn’t sing at all,” he told Ichigo.

Akio rolled his eyes. “Look who’s taking.”

“Go on, sing something,” Hisako said, nudging Akio in the side.

“Yeah, go on,” Ichigo encouraged. “You’re nice to listen to.”

“Well, of course,” Akio said, striking a pose.

Like this, the hour passed unnoticed, and no one wanted to leave.

“I’ll go ask for one more hour and get more drinks,” Ichigo said, standing up. “Anyone want anything?” He looked at the girls opposite him, then at his singing friends and was suddenly overtaken by a very strange and unsettling feeling. Abruptly, everything stopped: the people weren’t moving, Akio with his mouth open, frozen in front of the microphone; Timothy staring at the karaoke screen, his hands parted in some kind of a gesture, unmoving; the girls sitting at the table, one of them with a glass pressed to her mouth, another’s hands frozen in the middle of an applause. All of this was permeated with a Fullbringer’s energy.

“It didn’t seem like we were going to have some private time,” Kana explained calmly when Ichigo’s eyes snapped to her.

“What did you do?” the red-head asked warily. Not letting her out of his sight, he cast a look around the karaoke box again. Everything was still in a frozen stupor.

“I created a loophole in time.”

“Why?” Ichigo demanded.

Sighing, Kana rolled her eyes. “I’ve just explained.”

“You’re a Fullbringer, aren’t you?” Ichigo snapped. “Xcution is back, isn’t it? What do you, people, want from me?”

Kana grinned. “You’re smarter than you look.”

“What do you want?” Ichigo repeated, ignoring her taunts.

“What we want is for you to help us out.”

“Of course,” Ichigo snarled. “And since you’re asking for help so nicely, I’m going to rush into whatever you want me to.”

The girl shook her finger at him reproachfully. “Tsk, tsk… You haven’t heard what kind of help we want.”

“Let me guess,” Ichigo hissed, getting more and more irritated. “Your kitten got stuck in a tree?”

Kana shook her head. “No, Ichigo, no kitties are involved in this. Your power, we want all of it,” she said, her eyes sparkling with fervor.

Ichigo stared at her, old memories resurfacing, bringing back the painful moments of helplessness, of being useless. “No!” he hissed. “Never again.”

“Well, we figured that might be your answer,” Kana said with a sigh, “so we took some preventive measures against that.” She raised her hand and pushed her sleeve aside to look at her watch. “At about this time your sisters should already be home and…”

Ichigo’s hand reached for his Substitute Shinigami Badge before Kana had even finished talking. And then he froze too. She tsked in that excited voice again.

“How rude. Don’t think I’ll let yo-”

Kon flew out of the bag like a bullet. The soft plushy body hit Kana in the face and the environment sped up suddenly. Ichigo’s hand closed around the badge. He felt Kana trying to slow down time again, but the change didn’t affect him anymore – he was already in Bankai. It had been a mistake for those damned Fullbringers to believe that his Shinigami and lost Fullbringer powers were similar.

Ichigo’s soul hadn’t completely left his body, but his spiritual leg hit Kana in the chin so hard that she hit the wall behind her and slumped down motionlessly. Kon looked around wildly when Ichigo’s friends suddenly came back to life and started clamoring over Kana’s and Ichigo’s unmoving bodies. Ichigo grabbed Kon, stuck his fingers down his throat, pulled the pill out, leaned down to his motionless body on the floor, and forced it to swallow the pill. 

“Do whatever you want but make sure you don’t let her out of your sight!” the red-head shouted while tearing through the door.

It took him a few seconds to figure out which direction his home was in, then he jumped into the air. He gritted his teeth in anger helplessly. It was just like them to use underhanded tricks like these. Were his sisters still at home? Did they do something to them? What would he do if he was already too late?

The red-head was flitting from one roof to another so fast that he slipped and rolled down the tiles. Cursing under his breath, he stood up again. Ichigo’s heart was hammering in his chest wildly, a panicky hum filling his ears. He regretfully thought that maybe he should have used his phone to call Orihime, whose part-time job was close to their house, and ask her to help. On the other hand, maybe it was good that he hadn’t since he neither knew how strong the enemy was nor how many of them there were; she might have become an unnecessary victim. Or maybe she had left work early and was already at his house.

There was Ulquiorra, too. Ichigo’s state of mind was chaotic and he didn’t know what to expect from the Arrancar. He was probably still too weak to fight, and even if he wasn’t, would he even do anything about the situation? None of this concerned him, and he might not even think to interfere.

The way home had never seemed so endless. His Bankai form already allowed for incredibly fast travel, but those few minutes in the air, jumping from one rooftop to another, were excruciating. When he was closer to the area, he could feel the same peculiar energy he had felt a few days ago. Now he could clearly tell that it was a Fullbringer. He could also feel Ulquiorra there, his reiatsu calm and stable.

When Ichigo saw his house, the scene that unfolded before his eyes made him waver. His sisters and Ulquiorra were standing in the middle of the street, which now looked like a crater. They had their backs turned to the house. His sisters were behind Ulquiorra while he faced the intruder. Karin was gripping a baseball bat, but she had already seen what Fullbringers were capable of and was staring at the enemy anxiously. No one was moving. Ulquiorra’s helmet was cracked, small pieces of it missing, and Ichigo knew that he had to act quickly before it got even worse. 

Ichigo’s eyes caught sight of a body nailed to the neighbor’s stone fence. A green Zanpakuto was protruding from its chest. While the red-head was hovering above, his and Ulquiorra’s eyes met and the Arrancar motioned to the girls behind him. Wordlessly, Ichigo swooped down and grabbed both of them under each arm. He jumped into the air again and started distancing himself from the danger.

“You can’t just leave him there!” Karin yelled in a shuddery voice. Her grip on the baseball bat suddenly turned lax and it slipped through her fingers, plummeting down through the air. She watched it fall and hit the sidewalk. “That freak’s got a strange whip that can reach from afar.”

“I don’t think he’d want me to interfere,” Ichigo muttered. “Are you two alright?”

There was a pause then Karin nodded. “I think so.”

Ichigo gave a questioning look to the back of Yuzu’s head. “Yuzu?”

“What’s this about?” she muttered softly. “What do they want? Why did they come?”

“We’ll talk about this later,” Ichigo said abruptly, landing in front of Urahara Shop. “Now get inside and stay there,” he told his sisters, letting go of them.

Yuzu was about to say something, but looked up to see her brother’s speedily receding back. It was always like this.

TBC


	9. Part 9

**Thank you very much for all the kudos ^_^**

**The Heart in My Hand**

by chayron (lttomb@yahoo.com), beta-read by Ash

Part 9

Ichigo muttered angrily under his breath as he rushed back to his house. As he flitted from one rooftop to another, he thought about Kana and her acting. He hadn’t suspected anything. “Damn her,” he grunted. She was one of many, though. Everyone in Xcution had to be dealt with.

When Ichigo was nearly back at his house, he felt a shift in energy and a green Cero shot into the sky. That was Ulquiorra, and Ichigo realized that the Arrancar wasn’t as weak as he had appeared to be. The amount of reiatsu Ulquiorra was emitting now was enough to press an average Hollow flat to the ground. He was matching the amount of energy from the hostile Fullbringer. 

The red-head could see the Fullbringer circling Ulquiorra cautiously. The whip in his hand crackled with red energy, but he was hesitant to use it. It was obvious that the intruder wasn’t certain what to do about the situation since they had not expected such fierce resistance. 

Drawn out by the noise and voices, people began gathering on the street. They were only able to see the Fullbringers, though – one dead mystically hanging on the fence and another in the middle of the ruined street walking in strange circles.

Ulquiorra had no weapon in hand, but the second Cero that was forming on the tip of his finger was even more dangerous. Determined not to let it hit him, the intruder’s whip lashed out towards Ulquiorra. He was aiming for the hand with the Cero but the Arrancar flash-stepped backwards, the whip hissing past fruitlessly. Ulquiorra jumped onto the roof of the neighboring house. The Fullbringer stayed down on the street. He stared at the Arrancar, then suddenly started flash-stepping in the opposite direction. It was apparent that he had realized he stood no chance against the Arrancar. Not when Ichigo was waiting in the background.

The red-head was surprised by the sudden retreat, but Ulquiorra was already chasing the Fullbringer. As the Arrancar was flash-stepping past the fence, he pulled his Zanpakuto out of the other man’s chest. The Cero he released caught the fleeing Fullbringer on his back, tossing him forward and slamming him face-first into a building. The walls of the house started crumbling and evaporating together with the fading green light. Ulquiorra was already there with his Zanpakuto raised. The knocked down Fullbringer was barely moving, each motion forcing an excruciating groan past his lips. His clothes were singed, burned out and into his body, revealing the bloody mash his back had become.

Ichigo was just in time to wedge himself between Ulquiorra and the Fullbringer. The Arrancar didn’t look surprised at the interference but didn’t step back, his Zanpakuto unfalteringly hovering above the Fullbringer’s bloody back. 

“Enough,” Ichigo said. When Ulquiorra didn’t move, he tried to bodily force him to step back. That only resulted in their chests coming flush, the Arrancar ignoring him. They stood like that for a few seconds.

“Why?” Ulquiorra asked suddenly. “Don’t you want him dead? Out of this world?”

“His fate isn’t for me to decide,” Ichigo said, not budging an inch.

Retracting his Zanpakuto and sheathing it, Ulquiorra laughed softly. “Ichigo, you have been trying to do exactly that. Keeping him dead or alive are both decisions sealing his fate. You’re too late, though. He’s already dead.”

Quickly, the red-head turned to look at the Fullbringer. Indeed, he couldn’t feel any life-force anymore. From the bloody, mutilated back, his eyes snapped back to Ulquiorra.

“You…” he hissed.

“Aaaaand cut!” Kisuke’s excited voice echoed from afar. “Cut! Cut! Cut! Amazing! That body looks real! What incredible make-up!”

Startled, Ichigo and Ulquiorra turned to look at the former captain, who was running towards them with Ururu and Jinta in tow. Ururu was holding a video camera while Jinta was carrying a huge microphone. They pushed past everyone who had gathered around the remains of the house and the dead man. Another crowd could be heard clamoring a few hundred meters away, where they were still inspecting the street and the dead body near the fence. Ichigo could hear police sirens.

“That was an awesome scene!” Kisuke shouted, seemingly almost dying from happiness. Facing away from the crowd, he grabbed Ulquiorra by the collar and tugged him close so the Arrancar could read his lips. “You’d better scram,” he muttered. “The Thirteenth Division is about to show up.”

The Arrancar cast a look at Ichigo and then was suddenly gone, his white clothes fluttering as he flash-stepped away. His reiatsu was still felt for some time then disappeared, suppressed. Within a minute of Ulquiorra’s departure, Rukia and three other Shinigami from her division arrived. They immediately created a barrier isolating the real world and creating its copy instead. The sight of Ichigo and Kisuke bewildered them and, naturally, a lot of questions were asked. Ichigo gave a slightly altered version of events where he and his family had been attacked by Fullbringers and Ichigo had been the only one able to defend them. 

“Oh,” Ichigo tensed. “There’s another one with Kon in the karaoke café.”

“Not anymore,” Kisuke said, pointing at something in the sky.

Kon hit the ground in front of them with a loud thud and winced at the pain in his legs. He dropped Kana in front of Ichigo. 

“I was worried and thought that you might need help,” he explained. “They called for an ambulance, too. I didn’t know what to do.”

“I told you to stay there,” Ichigo grunted. He, however, wasn’t able to muster up any anger. “Karin and Yuzu are safe,” he said instead.

“Oh, that’s good. And where’s that…” Kon trailed off at the sight of Ichigo’s wide eyes and wordlessly moving mouth that was repeating ‘don’t, don’t, don’t, don’t’. “…cat?” he finished.

“It was scared off by the noise,” Kisuke said. “It should come back when the clamor goes down.”

The Thirteenth Division dealt with the situation quickly. They called for backup and, in less than twenty minutes, a new house was standing on the burnt grass, the street was fixed, and people went back to their houses thinking that a tornado had damaged some areas in the neighborhood. No one remembered any dead or strangely acting men. There were a few people who had been taking videos with their phones, but those had been rendered useless by creating a very strong magnetic field throughout the entire area.

If Rukia had any questions, she didn’t voice them. Ichigo was aware that a strong sensation of Cero remains could be felt all over the area. Doubtlessly, the division had also felt Ulquiora’s energy that strongly reminded them of a Hollow’s. Apparently, everyone had quietly agreed that Ichigo was responsible for all of that. Any other time, Ichigo would have felt uncomfortable and awkward, but this time their quick presumption served him well.

The division was about to leave when Orihime appeared. She had excused herself from work as soon as she had felt the strange reiatsu. While she had been running to Ichigo’s house, though, it disappeared. A weird barrier had appeared and when she reached the street where Ichigo lived, the surroundings had a very strange, artificial feeling to them – there wasn’t a living thing in sight and it felt as if time had stopped. It took her some time to realize what it was.

Orihime rushed to Ichigo and the Shinigami. Panting, she stopped in front of them. She started talking but the lack of air made her words incomprehensible and she put her hands on her thighs, leaning forward, trying to catch her breath.

“It’s fine, everyone’s safe,” Rukia said with a grin.

“Oh,” Orihime puffed out. “Oh, tha…that’s gr-great!” Wheezing, she stood like that for some time, then straightened. “What happened?” She cast her eyes around. “Where’s Ul…” she trailed off when Ichigo cleared his throat loudly. “Where are Karin and Yuzu?”

“They’re safe at Urahara Shop,” Ichigo said, not missing how Orihime’s eyes scanned the street. It was obvious that she was looking for Ulquiorra. Beside her, Kon was asking what her plans for the evening were. She didn’t seem to be listening, just nodded when Kon suggested having dinner with everyone.

After Rukia and the other Shinigami said their goodbyes and departed, Ichigo and his friends went to Urahara Shop to see how his sisters were doing. They appeared to be fine, albeit shaken up. Ichigo informed them of the outcome of the fight and what had caused it. What exactly the Fullbringers’ plan entailed and whether there were any more people involved, the Shinigami were going to find out from Kana, who they had taken prisoner.

They gathered in the guest room and Ururu disappeared into the kitchen to make tea for everyone. Ichigo returned to his body and sat quietly, watching his sisters talking with Orihime. There was something very peaceful and relieving about the scene, something incredibly sentimental, and he found that he couldn’t sit still and watch them. He got up and went after Ururu to help her. When he left the room and closed the door, though, he suddenly felt that he couldn’t take another step further, and had to lean against the wall. With a soft sigh, he slid down to the floor. Only now, at the sight of them sound and safe, the adrenaline rush retreated, leaving his legs wobbly and shaky.

Ichigo felt a familiar presence next to him. “You can laugh now,” he said without looking at the Arrancar.

“Why would I?” Ulquiorra asked, opening the door slightly and watching everyone in the guest room talk excitedly. Again, he was struck by the same idyllic scene as the one back then in Kurosaki’s kitchen.

Ichigo grunted and raised his head to look at Ulquiorra. The deep cut in his Hollow mask was even more apparent from up close and the missing fragments made its edges look sharp. Luckily, the strike hadn’t been fatal and the mask was supposed to regenerate quickly. Ichigo grimaced as the mutilated Fullbringer rose in his mind’s eye. He understood why Ulquiorra had shown no mercy, but he wasn’t used to dealing with his enemies in such a gruesome manner. It also bothered him that he kept forgetting how dangerous Ulquiorra was. The Arrancar had killed many; there was also a number of Shinigami amongst the victims.

Despite his damaged mask, Ulquiorra looked refreshed, and there was a towel thrown over his shoulder. His hair was wet, a few droplets hanging onto his neck. His white hakama had damp spots here and there. He had obviously taken a bath in the spring under Urahara Shop. He had probably checked their fridge, too. Ichigo’s eyes trailed down to the sheathed Zanpakuto at Ulquiorra’s side.

“What if Rukia and the others had come here?”

Ulquiorra shrugged. “Why would they?”

“Just to visit.”

“They didn’t.”

“You’re definitely getting comfortable here,” Ichigo pointed out.

“This is the only place where I can take a bath.”

“You can hear me already, can’t you?” Ichigo stated rather than asked.

“Yes. As long as you don’t mumble.”

“I don’t mumble. And you also hid the fact that a lot of your power had returned.”

“I didn’t want to cause too much excitement. Besides, when I woke up, you were at school.”

“University,” the red-head corrected. “I graduated from high school quite a while ago.”

“Whatever.”

“Thank you,” Ichigo said. “I can never thank you enough for saving them.”

Ulquiorra was quiet for some time, and Ichigo thought that maybe he hadn’t heard him, but then the Arrancar shook his head. 

“It was just a whim,” he said.

Ichigo grunted. He felt the urge to kick the Arrancar and call him a liar, but he held back since he wasn’t sure if Ulquiorra would take that as a friendly gesture. Instead, he reached his hand out.

“Thank you,” he repeated.

Ulquiorra turned away from the gap in the door and grabbed Ichigo’s hand, pulling him up to his feet.

Ichigo chuckled. “This wasn’t quite what I intend-”

“Ulquiorra! You’re already here!”

Both men started at Orihime’s loud voice. The door flew open and both of them stepped back instinctively. Orihime gasped and stopped on her way at the sight of Ulquiorra’s damaged mask. She gave the Arrancar a quick onceover and the anxiety on her face turned to relief.

“You’re much better already!” she said stepping through the door. “I heard what you did for…” She reached forward with the intention to hug Ulquiorra but stopped at the surprised and uncertain look in his eyes. “..for Yuzu and Karin,’ she continued. “And I grabbed a few buns on my way here.” She ran past them and into the corridor where she ransacked her bag. “I’m sorry there are so few,” she said, returning. “I had to rush.” She held the bag filled with buns in front of her for Ulquiorra to take.

“Thank you,” the Arrancar said, taking the bag. He held it out and shook it lightly. He was about to leave, but Orihime circled him and started pushing him through the door into the guest room. 

Grinning to himself, Ichigo followed them into the room. When they sat down at the table, Ururu returned carrying a huge tray filled with cups, spoons, sugar and two teapots. Under Orihime’s insistent gaze, Ulquiorra opened the bag and piled up the buns on the table. There were five in total. They were fresh, filled with raisins and cinnamon. The aroma spread across the room.

“A ‘few’?” Ichigo asked. “How many did you plan to bring? Twenty?”

Ulquiorra’s tea was poured from a different teapot than everyone else’s. He suddenly found himself under the scrutiny of all gathered people; even the Modified Soul that was sitting across the table was watching him with a huge beargrin on his plushy snout. Ulquiorra poked one of the buns. So soft. 

“I can’t ea-” Ulquiorra started.

“Ooh, is that a new handbag?” Kisuke exclaimed in a voice full of admiration.

“Uh,” Orihime said, taken aback by the excitement. She looked down at the handbag beside her and patted it, missing the sight of four buns being whisked off the table. “Yeah, I bought it two days ago.”

“Amashing,” Kisuke gargled around a mouthful of bread. “I wantsh to buy a…” he choked and started coughing. “A…a…similar one for Ururshu on hersh birthsday.”

“Are you alright?” Orihime asked worriedly at the sight of Kisuke’s red face. His cheeks were puffed out and tears were streaming down his face. “Wha-”

“Neversh been bettersh!” he assured her, trying not to chew.

Ichigo and Jinta were chewing as fast as they could; Karin had hidden her bun behind her back for later use. Yuzu and Ururu watched them with bored expressions.

“Oh, you’re almost done!” Orihime said contently at the sight of the last bun in Ulquiorra’s hand. “They’re really tasty, aren’t they?”

The Arrancar stared at her for some time, and then nodded. “Yes, thank you.” He nodded again, just in case. From the corner of his eye, he could see Ichigo washing down the remains of the bun with his tea. At least someone benefitted from this. He broke the last bun in half and gave one part to Ururu and the other to Yuzu.

“So generous,” Orihime sighed adoringly. “I’ll bring more tomorrow.”

“Awesome!” Kisuke said. “The more, the better!”

“Shut up, you glutton,” Ichigo muttered.

Ulquiorra thought that the red-head was being hypocritical.

\- - - 

Despite the fact that he had eaten a bun, Ichigo was looking forward to dinner at home. On their way back to their house, he wondered if it was safe for his sisters to stay there while Xcution members, very likely the mastermind included, were still on the loose. Karin and Yuzu could be kidnapped right off the street on their way to or from school. 

Ichigo looked at his sisters, who were chatting with Orihime; Kon was resting happily in Orihime’s arms, his head supported by two soft lulling pillows. The red-head’s eyes traveled to the end of the group, where Ulquiorra was following them quietly. In any case, with his returning father, Ulquiorra, and him, a solution would certainly be found. With that thought, Ichigo’s concerns were put aside and he brightened.

The house had been left unlocked and they quickly filed into the corridor and headed to the kitchen. 

“Ah,” Ichigo said when he opened the kitchen door and came face-to-face with his father. Everyone stared at Isshin quietly.

“Hi.”

“Hello.”

There was something unusual about his father’s facial expression. Ichigo saw him scan their small group. Isshin’s eyes widened in annoyed surprise. 

“Is that a Holl-?” Isshin started pointing at Ulquiorra, but trailed off since the energy didn’t feel quite like that of a Hollow. There was the common white hakama, too. “An Arrancar,” he concluded, even more annoyed. “Well, that, at least, explains this,” he said walking from the door to the fridge. He opened it and moved aside. There was a Hollow inside, dead eyes staring at them in permanent horror. It was a small, green Hollow, and since it didn’t quite fit in the fridge, it was folded in half. It was freshly killed.

Ichigo turned to Ulquiorra. “Oh, for gods’ sakes, just how much do you eat?” he asked in disbelief.

“Quite a lot,” Ulquiorra said. 

“Don’t just keep it in the fridge like that!”

“I was getting ready to cook it when those two Fullbringer idiots barged in,” Ulquiorra told him, mild irritation apparent in his voice. “Where else can I put it?”

“Yeah, where else can he put it?” Karin said walking to the fridge and slamming the door shut. Everyone exhaled in relief when the horrid, lifeless stare was hidden. “Would you stop bothering him?”

“I’m not bothering him, he’s bothering me,” Ichigo muttered defensively.

“Explain.”

The voice was on the brink of losing patience. That was quite scary since no one had ever seen Isshin lose his patience. 

“Explain why there is an Arrancar in my house,” Isshin repeated, staring at Ichigo. He leaned against the fridge and crossed his arms.

Ichigo and Ulquiorra glanced at each other.

“Well,” Ichigo started, “it’s quite a long st-”

Isshin’s mobile phone started ringing. He tried to ignore it, but it rang insistently without tiring. Intending to reject the call, Isshin pulled the phone out of his pocket. The name on the incoming call made him falter, though. After another moment of hesitation he answered it.

“Yes, Kisuke.”

“Not too bad, but I’m in the middle of something. Can you…”

“Yeah, they’re already back. Why?”

“Oh?”

“Really? Go on.”

“What do you mean?”

Ichigo couldn’t hear the other side of the conversation, but it had to be something interesting since his father started walking in circles then left the kitchen altogether, heading for the door leading into the clinic.

“I think we’re safe for now,” Yuzu said. “Let’s make dinner. Everyone will be calmer after eating.”

“Yes, yes,” Orihime agreed. She went to the kitchen counter to help Yuzu. 

“No,” Ichigo said softly, grabbing Ulquiorra’s sleeve when the Arrancar started to follow them. “Don’t start dismembering it in front of everyone.”

“Why not?”

“Because it’s disgusting.”

“Is it?” Ulquiorra asked. He wanted to tell Ichigo that he had seen Yuzu prepare chicken, and that there were many other pieces of meat in the fridge, but then decided that, for the most part, he understood what Ichigo had in mind. Still, humans ate cows, snakes, bugs, dolphins, almost all forms of life, what was so special about a Hollow?

“It’s cannibalism,” Ichigo told Ulquiorra, since he could see that the other man didn’t really get it. “And even if it wasn’t, it’s just… Well, it looks humanoid.”

“Ooohh…” Ulquiorra drawled. “Hm. But I’m not a Hollow.”

Ichigo shook his finger at him. “Now you’re just trying to balance on that tiny difference.”

“It’s not tiny at all!” Ulquiorra protested. “It’s as if you are saying that a Human and a Shinigami is the same thing.”

“They’re not. And that’s not what I’m saying. I’m saying… Ahh…” Ichigo trailed off, not finishing, wondering why he was arguing. “Just don’t cut it where they can see. Take it to the basement or something.”

“That’s just creepy, Ichigo!” Karin told him. 

“Then do you want him to dismember it here?”

“Well… Not exactly.”

“Yeah, thought so.”

Isshin returned to the kitchen about half an hour later, when dinner was almost ready. His eyes quickly found Ulquiorra and he started walking to the Arrancar. Ulquiorra, who was watching Yuzu masterfully fill bowls, turned to him. Ichigo stopped setting the table and, with the plates in his hands, tensed in alarm.

Isshin grabbed Ulquiorra’s hand and, pressing it between his palms, started shaking the Arrancar’s whole arm. “Thank you so much for saving my daughters! I don’t know what I’d do without them! I’m so sorry I was so inhospitable! Thank you very much! My fridge is your fridge! Keep as many Hollows as you want in there! We are so lucky that Ichigo has a friend like you!”

Ulquiorra tried to back away, but the former Shinigami captain followed him, keeping the pale hand hostage. 

“I was just returning a favor,” Ulquiorra finally said, trying to free his hand. He felt strangely uncomfortable.

“So he can stay here?” Ichigo asked carefully.

“Of course he can!” Isshin said excitedly, finally letting go of Ulquiorra’s hand. “Of course he will!” he declared, rushing to his wife’s photograph on the wall. “Oh, honey, such luck!” he exclaimed excitedly while kissing the photograph. “We have a new son in our family!”

Ichigo noticed Ulquiorra staring wide-eyed at him, his face one big question. It was obvious that he didn’t understand what was going on. ‘Don’t ask’, the red-head mouthed silently to the Arrancar. ‘That’s normal’, he added. He turned to look at his father, who was now hugging the photograph and sweet-talking to his wife. Then, from the corner of his eye, Ichigo caught sight of Ulquiorra staring at his own hand. He stared at it for some time as if there was something wrong with it, then, after noticing he was being looked at, lowered it. Avoiding Ichigo’s questioning look, he turned away from Isshin, who had finally let go of his wife’s photograph. Now he rushed to his daughters to give each of them a hug. After that, he tried to hug Ichigo, but the red-head waved him off. Then Isshin rushed back to his wife’s photograph.

Everyone else was used to displays like this and paid Isshin no attention. While Ichigo continued setting the flatware, the girls brought the food to the table. Everyone sat down at the table and started eating. Except Ulquiorra, who glared at Ichigo during the entire meal.

“So you can hear already?” Orihime said excitedly. ‘That’s wonderful!”

“Yes, it is,” Ulquiorra agreed.

“I’m telling you, he’s gonna kill us all!” Kon warned. He was standing on Orihime’s lap, head barely seen from under the tabletop. “He saved them just to gain our trust!”

“Behave yourself,” Orihime admonished Kon with a light pull of the ear. “Your jokes are going too far.”

“This is no joke!” Kon sputtered. “Now he’s barged into the family! He’ll lay low for a while, and then voila! We have a massacre here!”

Ichigo groaned. “Would you shut up already?”

“I won’t! Listen to me!” Kon demanded. “I know that… Ah…” he trailed off when a Cero started forming at the tips of Ulquiorra’s fingers. “Umm…”

“If you don’t shut up,” Karin told him, “the massacre will start right now, but you’ll be the only one getting killed.”

Isshin turned to Ulquiorra. “We can’t have that. That,” he said, pointing at the green ball on Ulquiorra’s fingertips, “will take out the entire wall and half the ceiling. No Ceros in the house.”

“Ha!” Kon grinned, jumping onto the table to do a small dance. He nearly knocked over Orihime’s teacup. “My win,” he bragged.

“Yes,” Ulquiorra agreed, extinguishing the Cero. “For now.” Not without satisfaction, he noticed Kon’s eyes cross in fear for his future.

The rest of dinner passed in a pleasant hum of content voices and chewing. Isshin shared his experience at the seminar and, overall, seemed to be very satisfied with it. 

“You have to visit the city,” he was saying. “Such a beautiful park! There were so many ducks in the river, too! And the people are so pleasant!”

“Did you actually learn anything useful at the seminar?” Ichigo asked after a bout of information about the city.

“Of course I did!” Isshin said. “Some very useful things! I’ll share everything tomorrow,” he promised the girls.

“Why aren’t you eating?” Orihime asked when she saw that the Arrancar was just sitting at the table without touching anything.

“Ask Ichigo,” Ulquiorra said with a roll of his eyes.

Orihime turned to the red-head but Ichigo pretended to be very busy with the fishbone in his fillet, then went to make more tea for everyone.

They finished eating, lingered around the table to talk about this and that and then dispersed into their rooms, or, in Orihime’s case, houses. Kon borrowed Ichigo’s body to see her off.

“I’ll come tomorrow,” Orihime promised Ulquiorra before going into the corridor. “You have to eat more. Those buns are good, but they’re just buns. You’re improving quickly, but still… Are you taking those vitamins I gave you?”

“N-”

“Of course he is,” Ichigo told her. “And he drinks lots of milk and exercises every day, don’t you?”

“N-”

“Of course you do!” Ichigo said.

“Whatever.”

TBC


	10. Part 10

Thank you for the kudos ^_^

 

**The Heart in My Hand**

by chayron (lttomb@yahoo.com), beta-read by Ash

Part 10

Ichigo woke up to a noise in his room. Something was shifting and rustling somewhere. It was still dark. Ichigo summoned his reiatsu to illuminate Ulquiorra standing at the door. 

“Gtsleep,” Ichigo mumbled drowsily, putting his head back on the pillow.

About twenty minutes later, he woke up to a loud, metallic clang. The sound was coming from somewhere downstairs. The red-head turned to the door to see light coming through the gap. Ulquiorra wasn’t in his futon. Ichigo threw on a T-shirt and went into the corridor to see what was happening. The light was coming from the first floor. Ichigo descended the stairs and turned to the kitchen, where the light was turned on.

Ulquiorra was standing by the stove. Chunks of meat were sizzling in a frying pan. Ichigo entered the kitchen and took a look at the clock above the door. It was five past three in the morning. He lowered his eyes to the floor, where two metallic pots lay. They probably fell out of the cupboard when Ulquiorra was looking for the frying pan.

“Come, join me,” Ulquiorra said when Ichigo lingered in the doorway.

Ichigo spared another look at the frying pan. “Nah, I’ll pass.” There was a large bowl filled with readied meat next to the stove, so he figured this was going to take a while. The red-head started walking out of the kitchen, but the feeling of guilt made him turn around. “Well, I suppose I won’t mind having some tea,” he said, moving towards the sideboard. 

The sound of Ichigo’s bare feet tapping across the floor made Ulquiorra look at them. He moved aside to let the red-head reach the kettle. He saw Ichigo’s eyes travel towards the bowl next to the stove.

“Does it really bother you that much?” he asked.

“Um,” Ichigo muttered, turning the stove on. He set the kettle on the burner and started raiding the cupboard for his favorite tea. “Not really. It’s just that… Well, I find it a little disturbing. It’ll take me some time to get used to this.” 

Ulquiorra watched Ichigo take out a blue tea pack and open it. The Arrancar shrugged and turned back to the stove. He took a spatula and flipping over the chunks of meat. He wondered how long Ichigo would refuse to eat a Hollow if he were starved. He was about to ask, but the kitchen door opened to let Isshin in. The man was only in his smiley underwear and pink slippers. The combination made Ulquiorra pause before he resumed cooking. 

Yawning, the former captain gave them a look that bordered on confused and annoyed. “What are you doing?” he asked.

“Cooking.”

“Making tea. Want some?” Ichigo offered.

“It’s three in the morning,” Isshin grunted, rubbing his reddish eyes.

“I’m hungry.”

“Yeah,” Ichigo confirmed. “You won’t like him when he’s hungry.”

“Give it a rest already,” Ulquiorra said. “I’m not going to eat anyone.”

“Just some Hollows,” Ichigo pointed out stubbornly.

Ulquiorra turned to smack Ichigo with the spatula, but noticed that the red-head was in his body and lowered it. “Leave your body,” he demanded.

“So you can hit me with that? Forget it!”

Between yawns, Isshin watched them argue. “I’ll have some tea, too,” he finally decided. He leaned against the counter while his son turned away from Ulquiorra and started searching for another mug and a different blend of tea.

“So how exactly did the two of you become so friendly?” Isshin asked.

“I tried to kill him.”

“I killed him.”

Isshin scratched his stomach thoughtfully. “Well… I heard about most of what happened from Kisuke but… This still doesn’t make any sense.”

The teakettle started whistling and Ichigo turned it off hurriedly so as not to wake up his sisters. He could try to explain everything to his father, but decided against it. He doubted that his explanation would make it clearer. It simply worked. Ulquiorra probably didn’t think much of it, but Ichigo always felt grateful and in debt to the Arrancar for saving him from the eternal guilt of Uryu’s death.

Ulquiorra ignored Isshin’s comment as well. All of it made perfect sense to him. He didn’t doubt Ichigo. The red-head was driven by inner forces that were completely different to his and most of others’. Ichigo fought for what he treasured and believed but, at the same time, it was never for his own sake. There was something unshakable about his resolve. Back then, after their fight, when Ichigo had lost the form of Vasto Lorde and saw the damage he had done unconsciously, he offered his arm and leg to redeem it. This was how Ichigo understood honor. Ulquiorra believed that this had probably been the same reason that the red-head had refused to kill him. Ulquiorra thought it was foolish, but he could understand that kind of thinking. A person like Ichigo would never betray anyone.

Only sizzling meat and Ichigo’s teaspoon, quietly mixing sugar, were heard now. Isshin waited for Ichigo to finish with the tea then, while his son was carrying the mugs to the table, squeezed between the sideboard and the wall, past Ulquiorra, and to the fridge. He found some leftovers and carried the plates to the table to arrange them next to the tea. He and Ichigo sat down at the table, and the red-head passed him a mug. 

“Thanks,” Isshin said, digging into the leftovers.

As he waited for his tea to cool, Ichigo watched his father eat. It made the red-head’s appetite increase, and a few minutes later he started fishing leftovers from the bowl as well.

Ulquiorra emptied the pan, then put slices of raw meat in it again. Leaving them to cook, he carried the plate with fried meat to the table and joined the Kurosakis. For a while, they ate in silence. 

“Don’t you want salad with that?” Ichigo asked.

The fork and knife stopped working in Ulquiorra’s hands and he gave the red-head a look. “Even if I had some seeds, I won’t be staying here so long as to grow a garden.”

“Oh, right, I forgot food h-”

“Do you like gardening?” Isshin asked, making Ichigo mentally groan; now there was no escape from his father’s obsession.

Ulquiorra thought for a moment. “I don’t know,” he said honestly. “I’ve never tried.”

“You’re missing out on so much!” Isshin revealed to the Arrancar. “Once the kids grow up, I’m retiring and buying some property in the country. I’ll be growing my own vegetables and fruit.”

Ichigo rolled his eyes. His father had been saying that for about a decade now. And yet, all they had in their garden were flowerless bushes of unknown origin. He wondered if his father had ever actually tried growing something.

“Aren’t you going back to Seireitei?” Ulquiorra asked.

Interested, Ichigo looked at his father. He had often wondered what exactly had brought his father to the Human World. Somehow, these types of conversations weren’t easy to start. 

Isshin shook his head. “No, not for a while. Someone has to protect Human World, too.”

“Hm.” Thoughtfully, Ulquiorra chewed on his steak. It seemed that Isshin was one of those people who believed that without them, the world would fall apart. Aizen was like that as well – always busy, always keeping an eye on everything. But then, without Aizen, everything really had fallen apart. It had been monstrous labor keeping the Arrancars and all kinds of Hollows working together. Normally, they would have killed each other in the first ten minutes. Would the world fall apart without Isshin? Certainly not. Ichigo was already shouldering most of the work. Or maybe that was the plan – to simply retire to the back of beyond?

Ulquiorra left the table to turn over the meat in the pan. By the time he returned, there was already a bottle of sake and cups on the table. 

“Do you drink?” Isshin asked Ulquiorra.

“No.”

Isshin turned to his son. “Ichigo?”

“No, thanks. And I’m underage.”

“That never stops you when you’re out with friends.”

Ichigo gave his father a suspecting look. “That was only three or four times.”

“Four,” Isshin confirmed, pulling the bottle closer to himself. “You two are no fun.” He started pouring himself a cup.

“Do you have someone following me?” Ichigo grunted.

“I don’t need to. Kon reports everything to everyone.”

“Oh, right. Kon,” Ichigo said, glaring at his tea. “He loves talking.”

“And what are you planning to do now?” Isshin asked the Arrancar. He sipped his sake. “I was told Mayuri is after you.”

“Just like the rest of them,” Ulquiorra muttered. 

“They have a good reason, though,” Isshin pointed out. “Many of them, in fact.”

Ulquiorra shrugged. He knew that. He didn’t elaborate any further and Isshin turned to his son.

“Any idea as to who the mastermind behind today’s attack was?” he asked.

Ichigo shook his head. “No, I haven’t been keeping any contact with Xcution. It could have been one of those men that Ulquiorra killed, but I doubt it. Normally, kidnapping operations are assigned to lower ranks.”

Isshin gulped down more sake and grabbed a cookie off the table to cover the bitter taste. “As far as I know, there was no hierarchy in Xcution, was there?” he asked uncertainly.

“That’s what they used to say. Turned out to be a lie,” Ichigo pointed out. “Maybe Chad knows more, but I really doubt that he keeps contact with any of the former members either. Well, I’ll ring him up tomorrow just in case.”

“It’s not safe until we find out more,” Isshin said. “I doubt they would proceed with the original plan but…”

Ichigo nodded. “Yeah, I thought I’d bring Karin and Yuzu to school first, then go to university. I think I’ll manage to pick them up in the afternoon as well. I don’t think they’d dare do anything at school with so many people around.”

“That would be the best solution,” his father agreed. “But you’ll have to make quite a detour.”

“Well…yeah, but…”

“I can do it.”

Both Isshin and Ichigo turned to Ulquiorra, who rose from the table and headed to the stove. They stared at his back then their eyes went to his damaged Hollow mask.

“Are you sure?” Ichigo asked after a pause.

Ulquiorra turned to him. “Mm?” the Arrancar hummed, his emerald eyes flashing challengingly at Ichigo. “I just said I was.”

“Ah, yeah, right,” Ichigo muttered, averting his eyes from Ulquiorra and giving his father an inquiring look instead. 

Isshin shrugged. “Should be fine.” He poured himself another cup.

Ichigo watched Ulquiorra turn off the stove, take the meat out of the pan, and pile up the steaks onto the plate. He returned to the table with the plate and continued eating. Ichigo had a feeling Ulquiorra was going to eat all of it.

“Do you always eat this much?”

“No.”

“That’s normal,” Isshin said. “He can’t replenish his lost energy in any other way. In Soul Society or Hueco Mundo, he’d be able to absorb a certain amount of spirit particles from the environment directly.”

“Oh, yeah,” Ichigo said, remembering, “I think Kisuke told me something like that quite a while ago.”

Ichigo had finished his tea a while ago but, even if sleepy, didn’t feel like returning to bed. His father was rather buzzed already, while Ulquiorra was still eating. The red-head went to make himself another cup of tea.

“It seems that Orihime has taken a liking to you,” Isshin said to Ulquiorra in a conspiratorial voice about ten minutes later. His happily intoxicated and reddish face was shining with amusement. “She kept staring at you.”

Ichigo blinked and nearly choked on his hot tea. “Enough drinking,” he told his father, moving the sake away from him. He had to agree, though, that he had noticed the same. He, however, didn’t find it amusing, he thought it was disturbing.

“Yeah, that’s my last,” Isshin concurred easily with his son. “Gotta be sober by eleven.” He looked at Ulquiorra, who hadn’t reacted to his words in any way, and grinned. “Don’t be shy. I’m sure Ichigo wouldn’t mind – they broke up a long time ago.”

Ulquiorra’s eyebrows rose. “Did they now?” he drawled, his emerald eyes concentrating on the red-head.

“Dad!” Ichigo grunted. “That’s it, let’s go to sleep, everyone. It’s already past four o’clock.”

Without protest, Isshin got to his feet and sauntered out of the kitchen. Ichigo cleaned up the table and left for his room as well. Ulquiorra joined him about ten minutes later, when he had finally finished eating. Ichigo shifted under the covers. The cool, clean sheets felt unbelievably pleasant against his skin. He yawned loudly. Ulquiorra was rustling about, getting into his futon.

“I’m certainly no expert in Human relationships,” Ulquiorra said suddenly. “But…are you a retard?” 

The red-head stiffened, then sighed. “Ugh…” he grunted sleepily. “I probably am, aren’t I?”

\- - -

It took some time for Ichigo to realize that it was his alarm clock making such a racket. Groaning, he groped blindly around the bedside cabinet to turn it off. Never had the bed felt so comfortable. Groggily, he sat up and stared at the wall in front of him for a minute or so. Then he fell sideways onto the fluffy bedding and groaned again.

Similar discontent noises were heard from the futon. Ichigo watched Ulquiorra sit up and toss the covers aside. He was naked underneath, and Ichigo averted his eyes to the ceiling. Ulquiorra was clearly male with all the required bits and pieces attached. They were probably in perfect working order, too. Ichigo didn’t know a thing about Hollows’ or Arrancars’ sexuality, but it had been bothering him since the day in the spring with Yoruichi. What was Orihime trying to do? No, rather, was Ulquiorra interested as well?

Naked bodies started meshing, twirling and dancing in Ichigo’s head. Green eyes and long red hair, entangling with shorter, black hair, suddenly came alive in his mind.

“Get up, or you’ll be late.”

Grateful for the interruption, Ichigo stretched and slid out of bed. The red-head mentally scolded himself. Ulquiorra was already dressed, his Zanpakuto strapped to his side. Ichigo noted that his Hollow mask seemed to be even more jagged, as if there were more pieces missing. Was that part of the healing process? Ichigo started throwing his clothes on.

“How did they even get a direct hit on you like that?” he asked.

Ulquiorra gave him a confused look before realizing Ichigo was talking about his Hollow mask. “It was Yuzu,” he said.

Ichigo’s arm froze on its way into a sleeve. “Huh?”

Ulquiorra was about to walk out, but turned around. “The one with the whip was going to slash me, and she jumped in front of me.”

“Ah,” Ichigo understood. His arm found its way into the sleeve of his shirt and he started buttoning it. “So you grabbed her and turned sideways.”

“Yes.”

“I see.”

“She’s quite like you in that sense,” Ulquiorra said with a light snort. “Jumping out in front of danger that she’s no match for.” He turned to go.

“Hey, I killed you,” Ichigo pointed out.

Ulquiorra rolled his eyes. “Don’t remind me. And was it even you who killed me?” He turned his head to Ichigo. “A few more seconds and your friend would have been dead, too. You’re… As a Vasto Lorde, you’re completely different, but it’s not really you, is it?”

Ichigo’s fingers tugged at the buttons of his shirt tensely. He raised his head to look at the door, only to meet intense, green eyes. 

“It seems to me that you have difficulty keeping all of those together,” Ulquiorra stated.

“All of those?”

“Well, Human, Vasto Lorde, Hollow, Shinigami, Quincy, and whatever else you harbor inside. They don’t always listen to you, do they? You probably don’t even know which one is the real you.”

“All of them,” Ichigo told him. “They’re all the real me.” Sighing, he shook his head. “It’s too early for this kind of conversation,” he muttered, feeling a headache form. He massaged his temples. “And even if it weren’t, I don’t think I’d want to talk about it with you.”

“Why not?” Ulquiorra asked him, amused. “Do you talk about this with your Human buddies? About how you cut your Quincy friend’s chest open?”

In a few quick steps, Ichigo was standing in front of Ulquiorra. “Screw you,” he hissed, tapping his index finger on Ulquiorra’s chest. “Screw you,” he repeated.

Ulquiorra moved aside to let Ichigo pass. The red-head jogged downstairs angrily. The Arrancar was about to follow him, but he saw Ichigo going up the stairs again. He wondered if the red-head wanted to tell him something else, or maybe punch him, but Ichigo wordlessly passed him, grabbed his bag off the chair, and jogged back downstairs. Ulquiorra thought that maybe he should have tried to handle that differently.

Breakfast was ready and Karin and Yuzu were half-way done eating. Kon was dancing happily on the other table in the living room, proclaiming his undying love for Orihime. Ichigo joined his sisters and dug into pancakes. A few minutes later, Ulquiorra entered the kitchen and, after retrieving some fried meat from the fridge, sat down at the table as well.

“Did you two get into an argument?” Karin asked after several minutes of silence. Normally, silence was a common occurrence, but today it didn’t feel right.

“No.”

“Yes.”

Ulquiorra and Ichigo looked at each other. Ulquiorra shrugged and resumed eating.

“Alright, we didn’t,” Ichigo conceded. “He just…” He trailed off as he remembered something. “Right, Yuzu, I forgot to tell you yesterday, but a friend of mine has some kittens. You’ve been talking about getting a cat lately. Want one?” Ichigo was suddenly blinded by Yuzu’s smile. “Umm… Don’t get your hopes up before we talk to Dad.”

“Leave him to me,” Karin told them. “He’ll be begging for a kitten once I’m through with him. Why didn’t we get a cat earlier?” she asked.

“Because you have that,” Ulquiorra said, pointing at Kon on the other table. Everyone turned to the plushy bear that abruptly stopped dancing.

“I heard that!” the Modified Soul screeched from the other end of the room. “I totally heard that!”

“He’s kind of right,” Ichigo muttered quietly, lowering his head to hide his smile. “He is more or less a pet. More like a dog, though.” He turned his head and accidentally met Ulquiorra’s amused eyes. The Arrancar didn’t say a word but he didn’t need to – Ichigo read it all in those emerald eyes. A pet that he lent his body to meet his ex-girlfriend. It wasn’t exactly that, if Ichigo said it to himself. On the other hand, it was exactly that.

“Just shut up,” Ichigo told him. Not feeling hungry anymore, he pushed the rest of the pancakes away.

The Arrancar shrugged. “I didn’t say anything.”

When everyone was done eating, they left the house. Kon’s head was sticking out of Ichigo’s bag.

“I hope dad doesn’t oversleep,” Yuzu said worriedly while locking the door. She turned to Ulquiorra. “Could you make sure he wakes up by ten? He needs to get the clinic ready.”

“Hm. Of course,” Ulquiorra agreed. He saw Ichigo grinning at him, but he didn’t mind being an errand boy for a little Human girl. Normally, his days were monotonous, and he didn’t have anything to occupy himself with.

While they were walking to the bus stop, Ichigo cast a look to the Arrancar, who was following them quietly. Just as he had thought, it did seem absurd to ask Ulquiorra out of the blue if he would ever be interested in a Human female. With a grunt, Ichigo slowed down to let Ulquiorra catch up with him. He wanted to have his moment before they separated for the day or else he would just keep thinking about it.

“Um?” Ulquiorra wondered when Ichigo kept staring at him.

“And if we talk about before, at least I, unlike someone here, have buddies,” the red-head said triumphantly.

Ulquiorra chuckled. Ichigo was still bitter about that. “How long did it take you to come up with that comeback?”

At first, Ichigo glared at him, but then couldn’t help laughing either. “About half an hour.”

At the bus stop they went separate ways: the sisters and Ulquiorra stayed at the bus stop while Ichigo headed for the train station. When the bus came, Ulquiorra wondered whether he should follow the bus or get on. He could feel that there was someone watching them. The presence was faint, but didn’t seem threatening since it didn’t feel like that of a Hollow. The reiatsu strengthened after Ichigo had separated from the group. Now it felt more like a Shinigami, thus Ulquiorra ignored it. It was very likely Kisuke had asked someone to keep an eye on the sisters.

There were a few confused murmurs and glances when Ulquiorra got on the bus. Invisible to others, the Arrancar shouldered his way to the backseat where the sisters sat. Sitting down was out of the question, so he kept standing. The closer to the school they got, the more people there were on the bus. Ulquiorra’s invisible body deceptively created an illusion of a free space. Yet, every time people tried squeezing into it, it appeared to be impossible.

When they got off the bus, Ulquiorra walked the girls to school and stood in the school yard for a few minutes, watching children stream past him and into the building. After that, with a few quick jumps, he landed on the rooftop and took a look around. He had time, lots of it.

There were three big yards that contained a pool, a few trees, and some sort of outhouse. One of the yards had a net in the middle and Ulquiorra wondered what or who they were trying to catch. He lingered on the school grounds for some time then left. The Shinigami had followed them to the school but stayed outside, watching.

Jumping from one rooftop to another, Ulquiorra looked around the area, found nothing of interest, and left the territory, and soon the city itself. He wandered about for quite a long time until he remembered that he had been asked to make sure Kurosaki woke up. He didn’t know what time it was but it was probably too late anyway. 

Hollows and Arrancars didn’t normally count time, it was of no importance. Ulquiorra, like most others, wasn’t able to tell the time before Aizen came. They did understand the concept of time, but it was mostly limited to “earlier”, “now”, and “later”. Aizen, though, had little patience for disorder and delay – if he sent someone on a mission, he expected them to be back when he had told them to, not half a century later.

There were things which Ulquiorra was grateful to Aizen for. By turning him into an Arrancar, Aizen had given his life purpose. His world had changed. Life as a Hollow had been passive; he used to wander around aimlessly. Fights for establishing authority over a piece of land didn’t interest him; other Hollows were better off as food than companions. So he wandered around, looking for something, not knowing what. In the end, he converged with a tree and did nothing but spend his days in peace and quiet. 

The purpose that Ulquiorra’s life was given was to loyally serve Aizen. That was fine with Ulquiorra, since there was nothing wrong with Hueco Mundo getting stronger. Shinigami were a natural enemy, and Aizen had gathered quite an army against them. It had seemed like it was possible to defeat the Shinigami. The King of Hueco Mundo was powerful as well, and almost no one doubted that he could easily overpower any enemy that dared face him. The only person he was afraid of was Aizen. Fear was a weapon that Aizen wielded masterfully.

Life as an Arrancar was…colorful. If asked, Ulquiorra wouldn’t be able to explain the exact difference. The two were completely separate lives, two different lives of two different people. He used to be a Hollow, but now he was an Arrancar. At present, impressions were more vivid, his reactions were much faster, he developed interest in many things, he had purpose. And at the same time, he retained all the memories that his former Hollow self had, and those memories had served as the basis for his new life.

Ulquiorra was close to the Kurosaki house now. When he entered the kitchen, the clock above the door read 10:40a.m. Isshin was moving about near the fridge, dressed in neat clothes, already shaved.

“Morning,” he said, turning to look at the Arrancar. “Did everything go alright?”

Ulquiorra nodded in answer and, since there was nothing to do in the house, left.

TBC


	11. Part 11

Thank you for the comments and kudos :)

 

**The Heart in My Hand**

by chayron (lttomb@yahoo.com), beta-read by Ash

Part 11

Ulquiorra wandered around the prefecture until noon, then got bored and left the city in search of a calmer place, with less people and noise. The Human World was beautiful; the problem was Humans in it. Land, forests, rivers, seas, everything thrived, and everything was infested with Humans. They shaped things how they wanted, built their absurd buildings, roads, bridges, boats, planes to spread even further.

Standing on the roof of a beach café, Ulquiorra cast a look at the sea. He suddenly wished for a tsunami to come and wash the ridiculous constructions away. Then he thought that he was being unreasonable – what did he care about the Human World? He chuckled, remembering what Gin had once said about Humans – each of them was a walking can of tuna waiting to be opened, their soul to be eaten. When Gin told him this, he didn’t understand, and the former captain had to explain what a tuna can was.

He missed Gin.

It was a strange feeling. Somewhere in this vast Human World, Gin had been reborn. Searching for him was pointless, though; he neither looked the same nor remembered anything. He could have also been reborn as a female. Yet his spiritual energy had to be strong, since when he was killed, he had been at the peak of his strength. He could probably see Hollows, Shinigamis, and other spiritual beings. He was probably followed around by countless Hollows all the time. Or maybe they had already killed him and he was back in Soul Society. It was pointless to dwell on it.

Ulquiorra sat down at the edge of the roof, reminiscing. He decided to leave the seaside and stood up abruptly. The sudden change of position made his head spin, his eyesight flickered. He nearly lost his balance but managed to pull himself back and further away from the edge before he could plummet down. 

With his back against the railing, Ulquiorra sat unmoving. He felt weak and there was an uncomfortable tension in his eyes. His vision was acquiring a particular tinge of yellow that was normally present in the second stage of his transformation. He was not surprised when his energy levels started fluctuating as well. This had already happened before, at night. It was a good thing Ichigo slept like a log.

Ulquiorra closed his eyes and concentrated on suppressing the imminent transformation. The instability was greater than before and it took him longer to harness his energy. He didn’t know how, but he could tell that he had to avoid transforming. 

When the strange spell passed, the Arrancar stood up and looked around. He was hungry again. There was nothing of interest close to the sea, so he went deeper into the settlement where there were more Humans and was soon rewarded with the sight of a tiny Hollow following two very noisy boys. The blue and red Hollow was so weak that it didn’t even have a gender. It didn’t look tasty either, far from it. Grimacing, Ulquiorra thought about looking for something else. He was about to leave when he had a better idea.

“Hey, you.”

The small Hollow looked around cautiously. It froze at the sight of a Vasto Lorde hovering above it.

“Me?” it squeaked in fear. It would have bolted if it had the courage.

Ulquiorra nodded. “Yes, you.”

“How can I help you, oh, mightiest of the mighty…” the Hollow trailed off since it wasn’t certain what Ulquiorra was. “…Vasto Lordes? Arrancars?” it offered tentatively as its eyes fixed on Ulquiorra’s damaged mask.

Ulquiorra rolled his eyes. It seemed that the only thing this Hollow was good for was ass-kissing. He could already tell that it tasted like something rotten. 

“Are there any other Hollows around?” Ulquiorra asked, motioning at the city in general. “Preferably ones bigger than you.”

The Hollow nodded quickly in confirmation. “Yes, yes! Two of them lurk near the trash containers in Apricot Street. It’s close to Garmart,” the Hollow supplied hurriedly when it realized Ulquiorra had no idea where Apricot Street was. “That way,” the Hollow motioned in hopes that the Arrancar would leave it alone.

Ulquiorra nodded in thanks. He thought about using a Cero, but a Cero took time to charge and the Hollow seemed like it was quick on its feet; he didn’t feel like chasing the repugnant creature around. So he drew his Zanpakuto and cut the little Hollow’s head off. It rolled over the asphalt and stopped when it hit the sidewalk. The smell was just as repulsive as he thought it would be.

Nobody liked a snitch.

Ulquiorra sheathed his Zanpakuto and left the Hollow lying on the asphalt. The two kids had already wandered off without noticing anything. Ulquiorra rose higher into the air, above the houses, and followed the directions he had received.

The little Hollow hadn’t lied. He soon spotted two Hollows feasting on something between two trash containers. When Ulquiorra approached them, it appeared to be a dead dog. The Arrancar frowned at their choice of food.

It took time for the two Hollows to notice that they were being targeted. When they did, one of them bolted into an adjacent alley and disappeared amongst the houses. Ulquiorra let him; he only needed one. He had already flash-stepped to the second one and raised his hand.

“Ulquiorra?”

“Mm?” the Arrancar wondered, his hand faltering in the air instead of delivering a fatal blow. He took a closer look at the Hollow. Quite a large black body, long arms and legs, clearly male with a green and yellow mask, from under which tufts of matted green hair were protruding.

“Everyone thinks you died,” the Hollow said.

Lowering his arm, Ulquiorra nodded. “I did.” He ignored the confused look on the Hollow’s face. “Have we met before?”

“Ehh… I used to take care of Las Noches, to make sure the first floor stayed free of sand. The name’s Amdogarez.”

“Ah.” Ulquiorra thought that he could remember a handful of Hollows running to and fro in the fortress. He stuck his hands in his pockets and descended to the ground completely. “How did you appear here?”

The Hollow’s eyes sparkled with cunning hope. “Grimmjow exiled us.” Just as he had expected, that caught the Arrancar’s attention.

“Oh?” Ulquiorra wondered. “So Jaegerjaquez’s survived. He’s always been resilient.”

“He’s proclaimed himself King of Hueco Mundo,” the Hollow spat indignantly. He waited for the Arrancar to react, but instead of anticipated anger and indignation, he could only see amusement on Ulquiorra’s face.

“Has he now? Well, seems quite fitting of him.”

“But you could easily defeat him and take the throne,” Amdogarez offered.

Ulquiorra shrugged. “Probably.” The throne was of no interest to him. Ruling over squabbling and fighting Hollows meant that there would not be a moment of peace. One would always have to threaten and keep watch on them just as Aizen had done. That would be annoying.

Ulquiorra looked at the Hollow’s hopeful face. He knew that Amdogarez was only trying to stall for time with this conversation and avert his attention to other things. However, despite the constant conflicts in the past with Grimmjow, Ulquiorra felt quite apathetic towards the other Arrancar. They had nothing to argue about anymore. Time was up.

And yet, something didn’t feel right. Ulquiorra thought about chasing down the Hollow that had disappeared somewhere amongst the houses. Ichigo was certainly rubbing off on him. Wondering where the other Hollow had gone, Ulquiorra turned towards the alley it had disappeared into and scanned the street before him. Without warning, Amdogarez slashed at him with his extended claws. Ulquiorra was just in time to raise his arm and shield his head.

The Arrancar turned to stare at the Hollow. Amdogarez withdrew his claws from Ulquiorra’s bleeding arm. The claws had easily passed through the sleeve that was now in tatters. The skin was cut to the bone and the Arrancar’s raised arm drooped limply, blood dripping down onto the white clothing, spreading into large red patterns. 

There was fear in the Hollow’s eyes as he passively awaited his deathly predicament. The next moment, he was flattened onto the asphalt, Ulquiorra’s reiatsu pressing him down, making him scream in pain. Wheezing, he stared up at Ulquiorra through bloodshot eyes. He couldn’t even think through the pain and just watched as the Arrancar came even closer and raised a foot over his face.

The mask under his boot made a satisfying crunch and Ulquiorra took his foot off the Hollow’s head. He was already dead. Ulquiorra lifted his left arm to take a look at the deep cuts. The muscles and skin were already regenerating, knitting back together. With a snort, Ulquiorra lowered his now useless arm back to his side. With his other arm, he grabbed the dead Hollow and hauled him up. He hoisted the body over his shoulder and headed to the Kurosakis’.

It only took a moment of weakness and he had nearly lost his arm. How was Ichigo still alive? Wondering, Ulquiorra shook his head.

ooOoOoOoo

At the sight of Rukia in the kitchen, Ichigo lowered his bag to the floor. He looked at Yuzu, who was bustling near the stove, preparing dinner, then cast a look at Karin, who was washing carrots in the sink. They could’ve warned him. At least Ulquiorra was out of the house. He couldn’t feel the Arrancar’s familiar energy anywhere.

“Ah, hello,” the red-head said, trying to sound enthusiastic. He was saved the awkwardness by Kon, who suddenly shot out of the bag and launched himself towards Rukia, his plushy legs spinning fast like a windmill. His attempt to reach the Eden of Breasts with a spectacular jump was interrupted by a rather ungraceful backhand hit. He sailed through the air and fell behind the sofa with a thump.

“Yes, yes, nice to see you, too,” Rukia muttered, ignoring the whining from behind the sofa. She turned to Ichigo and motioned for him to sit next to her. “I’ve got some information we thought you needed to know.”

“Has Kana revealed anything?” Ichigo asked.

Rukia nodded. “Most of it. It appears that the members of Xcution that we knew have nothing to do with this attack. Kana and three other people held Xcution membership as well, but were passive, having moved to different cities or countries. Kana… Get off,” she said, brushing Kon off her lap. “Stop climbing on me or I’ll do you with the laundry.”

“Do me…” Kon giggled. “I wouldn’t mind that.”

“Oh, for gods’ sakes,” Rukia said with a grunt. She grabbed Kon by the ear, stood up, and left the kitchen. She returned a few minutes later and sat down on the sofa again. “Where was I? Ah, right. So Kana returned to Naruki city half a year ago and found out what happened. She spread the word, and, after gathering information from the other members and a short investigation, they came up with a plan that was supposed to both give them more power and avenge their dead members.”

Ichigo nodded. “It didn’t exactly go as they planned, though.”

“Yes, luckily you were there on time.”

“So where’s that fourth person?” Ichigo asked.

“He fled after the unsuccessful attack. We’re still looking for him. His name is Akira Kawaguchi.” Rukia nodded at the questioning look Ichigo was giving her. “Yes, normally, Shinigami don’t interfere with Human affairs, but we’ve already had contact with Xcution as an organization. Besides, each of them have remains of Hollow reiatsu and must be brought under control.”

“I see. Any idea as to where he might be hiding?”

“We’ve checked the places Kana mentioned, but had no luck. We’ll just keep watch on them in case he appears. Meanwhile, try to be careful.”

Ichigo nodded.

“I wonder why Chad didn’t warn you, though,” Rukia said.

“I doubt he keeps contact with them after what happened. I was gonna call him today to ask him if he knows anything.” The pleasant smell wafting from the stove was distracting Ichigo. He was hungry and the food was almost done.

“How’s your father?”

“I haven’t seen him today. He was perfectly fine yesterday, though. Why?”

“Just asking.”

It was normal to ask, she asked about Isshin frequently, but this time it wasn’t just that; Ichigo could tell from her rather abrupt tone. Wondering what it was about, Ichigo inhaled the aroma of cooking rice and frying meat. Then he froze, his eyes widening. Ulquiorra was coming back from wherever he had gone to. His energy was barely felt, just a tiny streak in the vast forest of others. 

“Um… Is that everything you wanted to tell me?” Ichigo asked Rukia.

“Mm? Yes, I think so.”

“Right… Thanks.” He couldn’t tell Rukia to leave – that would just seem strange and suspicious. Ichigo stood up. “I’m gonna go change my clothes.” He left Rukia sitting on the sofa and went to his room, grabbing his bag on his way out of the kitchen. Ulquiorra’s reiatsu was clearly felt now. Why wasn’t he suppressing it? With a troubled groan, Ichigo grabbed his Substitute Shinigami Badge and left his body. Gods only knew what would happen if Ulquiorra and Rukia faced each other. Hoping he could convince Rukia to leave, Ichigo rushed back downstairs. Maybe she hadn’t felt Ulquiorra’s reiatsu yet and he would be able to drown it out. Ichigo grunted. Who was he kidding? Ulquiorra’s energy could be felt from anywhere in town. He would have to talk to Ulquiorra about flaunting his reiatsu like that.

The red-head entered the kitchen at about the same time as Ulquiorra. Ichigo stared at the Arrancar, who had just passed through the wall and was now crossing the living room. Noticing their guest, Ulquiorra stopped and nodded at the Shinigami. Then, paying Rukia no further attention, he continued towards the fridge.

“Uh,” Ichigo grunted in bewilderment at both the lack of Ulquiorra’s reaction and his chaotic appearance. “What the hell happened to you?”

Ulquiorra gave him a questioning look.

“You’re covered in blood!” Ichigo said, pointing at his slashed sleeve and hakama, which was covered in curdled brown spots and stains. “And what’s wrong with your arm? And why are you walking through the walls? Don’t walk through the walls! It’s creepy!”

“Did you get the cat?” Ulquiorra asked him. He passed Yuzu and opened the fridge.

“Not yet, first we’ll go and see which one we want to pick up.” Ichigo waved his hands irritably. “That’s not the point! What happened to you?”

“My lunch was being naughty.” Amused, Ulquiorra watched Ichigo’s face scrunch into a frown. He realized that he liked bewildering Ichigo just as much as he liked teasing him. “Never mind that,” Ulquiorra said. “I think you’ve got some explaining to do.” He nodded his head towards Rukia, who was standing now, staring at the back of Ichigo’s head.

Slowly, Ichigo turned his head to meet her gaze. “That’s Ulquiorra… And …”

“I know who he is,” Rukia said. “He’s on the wanted list. Or was. I’m not sure. He’s supposed to be dead.”

“Umm, yes, about that…”

“Ichigo, did you seriously think no one would find out that you’ve got an Arrancar living with you?”

“Hmm…”

“What in the world are you thinking?” Rukia snapped. “It’s an Arrancar! That’s not what I expected to find when I was sent here to make sure nothing happened to you or your sisters while we were looking for Kawaguchi. I saw him,” she pointed at Ulquiorra, “leave with you in the morning. Were it anyone else, the two of you would have already been reported.”

“Were it anyone else, you’d already be out of existence,” Ulquiorra remarked drily while arranging the plates he had pulled out of the fridge. “I could sense you all over the place.” 

“Are you threatening me?” Rukia hissed.

“I’m not. Just stop following me around.”

“I wasn’t following you around!” Rukia told him. “I was following Yuzu and Karin.”

“Oh, that’s okay,” Yuzu said. “I think we’re safe enough with Ulquiorra seeing us to and from school.”

Rukia looked at her, opened her mouth, closed it, opened it again, then closed it. Instead, she turned to Ichigo. “You’re rubbing off on them. They believe they’re safe with an Arrancar. That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard in my life. And I’ve lived for quite a long time.”

“You’re dead,” Ichigo pointed out. “And have been for quite a long time.”

“It’s not stupid!” Yuzu protested. “He protected us from those two yesterday!”

Rukia’s eyes travelled to Ulquiorra, who had set the plates on the table and sat down. Broken mask, bloody clothes. Not inspiring any trust whatsoever. At least now it was clear why the residual reiatsu from yesterday had felt so strange and different from Ichigo’s.

“Why didn’t you just come in while we were having breakfast?” Ichigo asked.

Rukia grunted. “What for? I didn’t expect to find an Arrancar in your house. He probably even stays in your room.”

Ichigo wondered why it was taking such a long time for dinner to be ready. Silently, he stared at the stove, pretending it was the most interesting thing in the world. 

Rukia slapped her forehead. “Are you an idiot? Do you realize how dangerous he is? If Urahara finds out, you…” She trailed off at the look on Ichigo’s face. “No way. He already knows, doesn’t he?” She face-palmed again.

“Hey, you’re really good at this,” Ichigo complimented.

“Shut up.” Rubbing at her temples to help avoid an oncoming headache, she leaned back into the sofa and sighed. “I should’ve known.”

A few minutes later, dinner was ready. Just as they were sitting down at the table, Isshin came out of the clinic. He took off his white coat and took a seat as well. He still had two hours of watch, but the family had a tradition of eating dinner together when he was available. 

Rukia watched them eat from the sofa. It was, just as always, idyllic. Even an Arrancar with bloody clothes and a damaged mask hardly disturbed the tranquil feeling. She wondered why no one had told Ulquiorra to change. Then she realized that he only had two options: to find some spiritual water and wash it or just discard his current clothing and summon new ones. Both required him to get naked.

Ulquiorra was having trouble eating. His upper left arm was wobbly and the steak kept resisting his knife. At one point it nearly flew out of the plate. Both alarmed and amazed, Rukia watched Yuzu lose her patience and pull Ulquiorra’s plate to herself. She took his knife and fork and started cutting the meat to pieces. Ulquiorra looked as much annoyed as content. It was a strange combination.

“Thank you,” he said when Yuzu pushed the plate back to him and passed back his knife and fork.

“Get him a watch,” Isshin told Ichigo.

Chewing on his rice, the red-head gave his father a questioning look.

“He never knows what time it is,” Isshin explained. “He keeps checking the clock.” He motioned to the clock above the door. “And he picked up the girls late.”

“Do you want a watch?” Ichigo asked Ulquiorra.

The Arrancar thought for a moment then nodded. Being restricted by time was annoying, but he kept turning up late. First, he was late to wake the former captain, then he was late to pick up Ichigo’s sisters. At least the girls had enough sense to wait for him and not to go anywhere alone.

“We’ll have to go to Kisuke’s for that,” Ichigo said. “I hope he has something to offer; a normal watch will just look like it’s floating in the air.”

The doorbell rang and Karin went to open the door. She returned with Orihime in tow. Just like her friends, Orihime was bewildered at the sight of Ulquiorra’s tattered sleeve and bloodied clothing. She quickly lowered the bag she had been carrying onto the sideboard cabinet and approached Ulquiorra. Without warning, she unpinned her hair clips from her collar. Ulquiorra’s fingers wrapped around her wrist, making her start. On the sofa, Rukia leaned forward in alarm, ready to act. 

“It’s just a scratch,” the Arrancar said. “It will heal in a few hours.”

“But…”

“His high-speed regeneration will take care of it,” Isshin said, noting that Ulquiorra didn’t look like going into discussions concerning this.

“Really,” Ichigo said, “she could heal it in a few minutes.”

Ulquiorra turned to him. “I wasn’t aware we were holding a competition,” he said, still not letting go of Orihime’s wrist.

“A man pays no attention to scratches like those,” Isshin stated proudly.

Ichigo rolled his eyes. “He can’t even hold a fork, much less use it.”

“Just leave their festering male egos alone,” Karin told Orihime. “Let them stay cripple and proud.”

Orihime hummed dubiously and tried to free her wrist. Seeing that she had no intention of touching him anymore, Ulquiorra let go. Orihime pinned her hair clips back to her collar. She went to get the bag she had brought from the sideboard cabinet and took out five buns.

“At least take these,” she said, pilling them up next to Ulquiorra’s plate.

She sounded upset, and Ichigo cleared his throat, frantically trying to think of a way to improve the situation.

“We’ve decided to get a cat,” Karin said, saving her brother the trouble.

Isshin pursed his lips. “You have?”

“A cat?” Rukia asked. “Why a cat?”

Orihime and Isshin stared at Karin. Then Isshin glanced at the Arrancar, who shrugged. Ulquiorra could see why Isshin was hesitating. Most animals could sense spiritual presence while cats could not only sense, but also see it. While hunting and wandering around during the past two days, Ulquiorra had seen a few cats. They all ran away from him as soon as they sensed or saw him. Keeping in mind that the Kurosakis’ house was frequently visited by spiritual beings, not to mention inhabited by some, keeping a cat was probably not a very sensible decision.

“Well, if it’s a kitten…” Isshin finally said, urged on by his daughters’ hopeful faces.

Yuzu nodded enthusiastically. “Yeah, Ichigo said that it’s a kitten.”

“Ah, Ichigo?” Isshin turned his head to stare at his son, who gave him an innocent look. He tuned back to his daughters. “But you’ll have to take care of it properly.”

“Of course we will,” Karin said indignantly. “It’s not like we’re five-year-olds.”

Ulquiorra watched Isshin mellow out completely. A few years, or even days ago, he wouldn’t have been able to imagine that the former Shinigami captain could be like this. It was an interesting phenomenon. He would probably do anything his children asked of him. He created the impression of a disregarded fool. Ulquiorra wondered about that for a few moments. He didn’t understand much about parent-child relationships. There were hardly any families in Hueco Mundo and very few offspring. Some Hollows raised and protected their young while most just left them to fend for themselves soon after they were born. The majority didn’t survive, but if they did, it was either thanks to sheer luck or their cunningness, or both. However, no matter how Hollows were raised, in the end, they could just as easily kill and eat their parents as any other weaker Hollow.

For that reason, Ulquiorra felt that the scene before him was foolish. Nonetheless, to his surprise, he could understand why it wasn’t. This discovery made Ulquiorra feel strange and he looked at his right hand. Thoughtfully, he twirled the knife. Isshin’s children would do anything he asked of them, too. This accommodating trust went both ways. He had seen how worried Ichigo had been about Isshin’s return. It did seem foolish, but there was something nostalgic about it.

“Why aren’t you eating them?” Orihime asked.

Ulquiorra eyed the deliciously looking pastries on the table, then at the few pieces of steak on his plate. “I think I’m full for now. Thank you.” Then he realized that he felt guilty.

Secretly, Ichigo gave him thumbs up and Ulquiorra rolled his eyes. Why didn’t they just tell her that he couldn’t eat them? This was starting to annoy him.

The rest of the dinner passed discussing what a kitten might need. It was agreed that Karin and Yuzu would go shopping tomorrow to get cat supplies while Ichigo was instructed to arrange a meeting with Fumiko and her kittens. After everyone finished eating, they started cleaning off the table and washing the dishes. Isshin returned to the clinic, while Rukia said that she had to return to Seireitei.

She noticed Ichigo looking at her from across the kitchen. “No, I won’t tell anyone,” she said. “Make sure I don’t have to,” she added.

Ichigo nodded. “Of course.” He turned to Ulquiorra, who was watching them with an apathetic look, as if this didn’t concern him. “You hear that?”

“I think I’m having hearing problems again,” the Arrancar notified him stubbornly. “So how about that watch? Should I just go to Urahara?”

“Um,” Ichigo said, unsure. When he had suggested it, he had in mind that the two of them would go together. On the other hand, it wasn’t a problem - Ulquiorra was already wandering all over the town. “Yeah,” he agreed, “you should get going now, before it gets too late.” Orihime was walking out of the kitchen and he followed her.

“Where’s Kon?” she asked while putting her shoes on. “I haven’t seen him today.”

“Oh,” Ichigo said, remembering. “He was being touchy-feely with Rukia, so she carried him off somewhere.” He saw Orihime frown, but didn’t feel guilty in the least. He left Orihime tying her shoelaces and went to the second floor. He checked his and his sisters’ rooms, but there was no sight of Kon.

The red-head had a hunch that Kon had ended up in the laundry basket again. Instead, he found the Modified Soul in the washing machine, behind the glass door. He was submerged in soapy water up to his neck and was beating on the locked door with his wet plushy paws. Then the tumbling began and his indignant shouts and pleas were drowned out by spinning. 

Ichigo wasn’t cruel by nature, but he could enjoy justice when it was served right. He backed away from the washing machine and turned the lights off. Let someone else rescue him. 

TBC


	12. Chapter 12

**The Heart in My Hand**

by chayron (lttomb@yahoo.com), beta-read by Ash

Part 12

Chad was surprised to hear Ichigo on the phone. The red-head began to think that he should start calling his friend more often, not just when he and his family were under threat. Feeling a little guilty, he arranged to meet Chad by Karasu River, near his home in half an hour.

It was already dark, but the familiar streets didn’t rouse any suspicion. When Ichigo got to the river, Chad was already waiting, sitting on a bench near the water. His friend looked even bigger than he remembered. He was clearly working out. They greeted each other as they always had and the awkwardness disappeared. It felt as if the time gap after high school never happened. They took a walk along the river.

“Are you still working in that pet shop?” Ichigo asked, rearranging his feet unhurriedly. Chad nodded, and Ichigo wasn’t surprised. There were few things that interested Chad. He had always liked animals. MEOW was a big pet shop in the middle of Karukura Town, offering all kinds of pets. The pay was probably pretty decent there as well. 

“Sometimes Yuzu comes in to play with the cats after school.”

“Oh,” Ichigo said, surprised. “Well, we are getting a kitten. Umm…from my friend at university,” he added a little guiltily. “She’s got a lot of kittens.”

“That’s good. I can tell that she’ll take care of it.”

Chad was a man of few words. When he talked, it was straight to the point. Most of the time he was quiet, floating in his own thoughts, in his own world. Despite that, Ichigo had always felt comfortable around him. There was something soothing about Chad’s silence.

“Have you heard anything about Xcution lately?” Ichigo asked.

“Xcution?” Chad said. “No. I left after everything that happened and haven’t kept in contact with any of them.”

“I see.”

“Did something happen?”

“Some Xcution members tried to kidnap Yuzu and Karin yesterday.”

Chad stopped walking. “Are they alright?”

“Yeah, they’re fine,” Ichigo answered, stopping as well.

“I did feel a disturbance near your house yesterday, but it was already over when I got there.”

“Why didn’t you call me?”

Chad shrugged. He was curious about that as well. Past Ichigo’s shoulder, he cast a look at the slowly flowing river. He knew Ichigo was busy. Somehow the red-head managed to get himself into all kinds of situations.

“Two attackers were killed, another taken for interrogation,” Ichigo told him. “We’re still looking for the fourth, the mastermind behind this. His name’s Akira Kawaguchi. Have you heard anything about him?”

Chad shook his head. “No, I don’t know him.”

“Have you noticed anything strange lately?” Ichigo insisted.

“Not really. You can ask Ulquiorra, though. He’s been hanging around Karakura lately, hunting Hollows. Maybe he knows.”

Ichigo stared at him. “Ulquiorra?”

“Yeah,” Chad confirmed. “Don’t you remember him? Short Arrancar, green Zanpakuto, he’s the one who kidnapped Orihime back then.”

“Ah,” Ichigo muttered, uncertain. It seemed that no one had informed Chad about the situation. The red-head wondered shortly what Ulquiorra would think of being called a short kidnapper, but anyone next to Chad’s nearly two meter’s height seemed petite. “Um… Did you try fighting him?”

“Fight Ulquiorra?” Chad asked a little surprised. “No, he wasn’t aggressive. I asked him what he was doing in Karakura and he told me he was lying low for awhile before returning to Hueco Mundo.”

Ichigo scratched his head. He and Ulquiorra obviously had a different understanding of what “lying low” meant. Soon everyone in the town would know about him. Ulquiorra could be strange at times. The Arrancar had never mentioned meeting Chad either, much less talking to him.

“It’s a long story,” Ichigo said, “but Ulquiorra lives in my house.”

To his credit, Chad didn’t look very surprised; he rarely did. “I see.” He started walking again. “I’ve got time. How about you?”

\- - - 

Ichigo was in a good mood when he was walking back home. It felt great to see a friend after a long time. He had explained the situation involving Ulquiorra to Chad and gave more details on Xcution. When they were saying their goodbyes, Chad invited him to come to the pet shop and promised to help find everything a cat might need.

The red-head was walking across the bridge when he felt a familiar spark of energy in the air. He looked around but didn’t spot anything. He was about to tell Ulquiorra to stop hiding and come out, but caught sight of movement on a nearby roof and, in a few jumps, the Arrancar appeared on the bridge guardrail. Then he landed next to Ichigo.

“You’re good at sensing reiatsu,” Ulquiorra remarked.

“Of course I am,” Ichigo told him, continuing to walk. He took note that Ulquiorra had changed his clothes. He hoped the Arrancar had changed before going to Kisuke’s. He wasn’t certain how the former captain would react to a bloodied Arrancar showing up on his doorstep.

Ulquiorra fell in step next to Ichigo. “Did he know anything?”

Ichigo shook his head. “No. He hasn’t kept in contact with them.” He could see that Ulquiorra was favoring his left arm, keeping it straight. It was going to heal in a day or so but it still bothered Ichigo since it seemed painful. 

“So did Kisuke give you a watch?” Ichigo was intrigued by the look on Ulquiorra’s face that appeared after his question. It was the same look that the red-head had seen when he had wanted to tape the Hollow hole on Ulquiorra’s chest, and the same look when he demanded Ulquiorra not to eat a Hollow. It was a look of sheer confusion.

“He gave me this,” Ulquiorra said, pulling a red mobile phone out of his pocket. “How do I use it?”

Ichigo grunted. “Ugh. Why didn’t he just give you a watch?”

“He told me I had a lot of catching up to do,” Ulquiorra explained, tapping the screen. “It’s not that I mind, but he told me nothing of how to use it. Does it show the time?”

“Yeah. Did he give you a charger?”

“A what? He charged you ten thousand yen for this,” Ulquiorra said, waving the phone in his hand. “He said you have to pay in a week’s time.” 

“That bastard! No, I mean did he give you anything else with the phone? Like a white or black cable?”

“Yes, there is something like that in the box that came with this.”

Since Ichigo had a very clear premonition that, while they were on the bridge, the only place the phone would go was into the water, he waited until they reached the end of the bridge before showing Ulquiorra the basic features of the phone. He was impressed with how quickly the Arrancar could catch on. The problem was that Ulquiorra had trouble using it with his injured arm. He didn’t appear happy when informed that he could now be reached anywhere, either. Sensing that the other man would just throw the phone away if annoyed, Ichigo showed him how to mute and turn it off. He, however, had his doubts about Ulquiorra receiving many calls.

When they got to the house, everyone was getting ready to go to bed. Ulquiorra’s phone was passed around and everyone’s phone numbers were entered. Ichigo didn’t even pretend to understand how it could work with both spiritual and material networks.

Kon had already been rescued from the washing-machine and was walking around, rearranging his damp feet carefully on the floor. At the sight of Ichigo, he nearly went berserk. Karin had to tear him away from Ichigo’s leg since he kept trying to chew it off with his plush mouth.

“I know you saw me in the washing-machine!” he screeched.

“It wasn’t me who put you in there and I think you deserved it,” Ichigo told him, making Kon nearly explode with rage.

“You! Ungrateful… How dare you say that! How…” Kon trailed off, realizing that he had a better target for letting his anger out; Ichigo barely reacted to his complaints anymore. He glared at Ulquiorra. “What are you looking at?” he demanded. “You think this is funny, don’t you? Let me tell you that nothing’s funny about this! And where did you take Ichigo? Are you already making plans to usurp this family? Where are you going? Hey, listen to me when I’m talking to you!”

Ignoring the bear, Ulquiorra walked towards the stairs to the second floor. Growling, Kon latched onto the Arrancar’s left arm in an attempt to prevent him from leaving. Ulquiorra stopped. His body straight as an arrow, he turned his head to look down at the bear attached to his arm. Before he could tear the Modified Soul to pieces, Ichigo grabbed Kon and took his paws off Ulquiorra’s injured arm as gently as he could. Then he ran outside, holding Kon. Ulquiorra nearly bolted after them but managed to stop himself. Slowly, he turned to stare at the wall in front of him and started counting in his head. He did so until the irresistible urge to chase Kon and tear that stupid creature limb from limb disappeared.

Ichigo and Kon spent about ten minutes walking outside on the streets. The red-head explained to Kon what had happened and advised him not bother Ulquiorra. He doubted there was much point in saying that, though. When Ichigo decided that it was safe to return, Ulquiorra was already on the second floor, in his room. Ichigo took a shower, brushed his teeth and went to his room as well.

Lying on his bed, Ichigo cast a look at Ulquiorra’s futon, where the Arrancar was sitting. He had torn his sleeve off and was looking at his injured arm, trying to flex it. He couldn’t press his fingers into a fist. Kon had probably made it worse.

“Does it hurt?”

Ulquiorra looked up at him. “Not really. It looks worse than it is.”

Ichigo slipped out from under the covers and sat down next to the futon to take a closer look. Indeed, it was almost healed, the red slashes still visible, but not gaping as it had first appeared. That was high-speed regeneration for you. Ulquiorra was able to regenerate limbs in the blink of an eye, but proper functioning required a little more time.

“You know that Orihime is good with these kinds of wounds,” the red-head told him. “Why didn’t you let her heal it?”

“I didn’t want to,” Ulquiorra said. 

Ichigo, who was still looking at the claw-marks on the Arrancar’s upper arm, could feel the other’s curious eyes on him. He wanted to ask why Ulquiorra was against it, but never voiced the question. Ichigo shifted awkwardly.

“So how did this happen?”

“I was careless.”

“That’s kind of obvious,” Ichigo pointed out.

Ulquiorra chuckled. “Indeed. Won’t happen next time.”

“Good.” Sighing, Ichigo moved and sat cross-legged on the futon so the floor stopped freezing his behind. “You know,” he started, “at the rate things are going, you’ll probably have to flee soon. You stand out too much. I can always sense you all over the place.”

Ulquiorra moved his arm behind him, out of the red-head’s sight. Ichigo’s proximity was a little disturbing. “I don’t think she’ll tell anyone,” he said.

Ichigo shrugged. He wasn’t so sure about that. She might if she thought it was the right thing to do. Rukia aside, there were too many people who knew where Ulquiorra was. This wasn’t a question of “if”, it was the question of “when”.

“I’ll keep my promise, though,” the red-head said. “Once you’ve regained your strength, we’ll have to do something about Mayuri.”

“You don’t have to.”

“Of course I do.”

Ichigo sounded resolute and Ulquiorra looked at him. Ichigo amazed him sometimes. This situation didn’t have anything to do with Ichigo at all, yet the red-head was putting himself at risk in order to satisfy that strange sense of “justice” that he harbored. He was not quite right in the head.

Feeling awkward under the emerald gaze, Ichigo lowered his eyes to the floor and spotted the phone next to the futon. It was near the pillow, but Ichigo still wondered if the Arrancar would just step on it in the morning. The phone was upside down and it gave Ichigo an idea.

“Do you know how to read the numbers it shows?” he asked Ulquiorra.

“Of course I do.”

“Just checking. I was told a while ago that Hollows don’t measure time.”

“That’s true – they don’t,” Ulquiorra agreed. “No one did before Aizen taught us. Most of them still don’t.”

“So how do you know what time it is, then?”

Ulquiorra’s eyebrows furrowed. It seemed that Ichigo failed to grasp the concept of not measuring time. Humans were strange. “We don’t.”

“But…” Ichigo trailed off, trying to organize his thoughts. “But how do you arrange to meet someone?”

“We don’t.”

“But how do you make arrangements to…meet friends?” Ichigo insisted.

“Ichigo, we don’t. We don’t have friends. If you see a few Hollows together it means that one of them is strong enough to keep the rest as lackeys.”

“But…”

“Why are you so interested in Hollows anyway?”

Ichigo pursed his lips stubbornly. “I’m just trying to understand you better.”

Ulquiorra chuckled. The sound was unusual and strangely sincere. “I’m not a Hollow. Aizen changed everything.”

Ichigo turned to the side and stretched his legs on the futon next to Ulquiorra, getting more comfortable. “That’s what I’m trying to understand – why did you agree to serve him? You don’t look the kind that likes to be ordered around.”

Ulquiorra leaned back, away from Ichigo, trying to retain his personal space. “He found me and asked me to,” he explained. “I could have refused, but he would have killed me.” Shortly, Ulquiorra wondered why he was telling Ichigo this. Then he decided that none of it mattered anymore – that part of his life was already over. “I had no reason to refuse – he offered me something new, something I was interested in. He gave me a reason to live.”

The red-head stared at the other man, frowning. “A reason to live?”

Ulquiorra nodded. “He gave my life a purpose. That was all I could have asked for, and he knew I’d always be loyal to him for that exact reason.”

“Even now?” Ichigo asked suspiciously. No matter how grateful Ulquiorra seemed, it was just wrong. Aizen had simply exploited Ulquiorra, just as he had all of his other creations. He was certain Ulquiorra understood that as well.

Ulquiorra gave the red-head an amused look. “Do you think I would be telling you this if I had any plans to free him?”

“I don’t know,” Ichigo said honestly. “I don’t know you well enough and your mindset is completely different from mine.”

“True. I think I know your mindset pretty well, though.”

Ichigo rolled his eyes. Ulquiorra was teasing him again. “What will you do when you go back to Hueco Mundo?”

The question made Ulquiorra think. He truly missed Hueco Mundo – it was his home, but he wasn’t certain what he would do once he returned. He knew that he would not be able to go back to his lifestyle as a Hollow – he had changed too much, and he was still changing. There was also the matter of Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez. The other Arrancar was going to find him sooner or later and was going to bother him. He could guarantee it.

Ulquiorra shrugged. “We’ll see.” He tensed in surprise when Ichigo suddenly reached out to touch the side of his head.

“It doesn’t seem like it’s healing,” the red-head said, carefully tracing the jagged corners of the Hollow mask with his fingers. “How long does it normally take for it to heal?”

Interested, Ulquiorra watched the other man. Was Ichigo just clueless or was he being suggestive? “Depends.”

“Hmm…”

“When you sit so close, you make me want to…”

“…To eat me?” Ichigo finished for him with an indignant snort. He retracted his hand angrily.

Ulquiorra blinked. The red-head was glaring at him challengingly. True, Ichigo smelled as pleasant as ever but, currently, the thought of eating Ichigo seemed very strange. Was Ichigo really that oblivious?

“No, not exactly,” the Arrancar said, amused. “Other things.”

“What things?” Ichigo demanded. “What do you want to do to me? To fry me first then eat me?” Ichigo spat. He was about to say something more, his eyes flashing angrily. He leaned forward at the same time as Ulquiorra.

“No, Ichigo,” Ulquiorra whispered into his ear. “Other things.”

Ichigo froze. The voice was soft, seductive and amused all at once. The red-head wasn’t certain he had heard or understood right. Wide-eyed, he pushed at Ulquiorra’s chest, leaning away from him. Then red exploded all over his face.

“Uh…” Ichigo stammered after a few moments of stunned silence.

“I’m not going to attack you,” Ulquiorra said, indicating Ichigo’s hands, which were still raised in front of him, as if putting up a barrier between himself and Ulquiorra.

“Err…” Ichigo muttered, lowering his hands.

“Not when you’re in your Human body,” Ulquiorra added. “And it’s not like I stand a chance with the current difference in our power levels and my injury.” He had only teased Ichigo but the red-head’s eyes had grown wide in alarm again. That, for some reason, annoyed Ulquiorra.

ooOoOoOoo

Ichigo peeled his eyelids apart and blinked his bloodshot eyes at the bedside cabinet. His alarm was going off like there was no tomorrow. Groaning, Ichigo slapped his hand onto the mobile phone and ceased the noise. He’d barely slept. The reason for his lack of sleep was sitting on his futon wide awake and well-rested.

The red-head grunted at the sight of Ulquiorra and shut his eyes again. In addition to being sleepy, he was sprouting an erection. His morning wood stood proudly at attention and Ichigo turned on his side to hide it. Any other time, he would have just taken care of it.

Dazed, Ichigo stared at the wall in front of him. The situation reminded him of when Rukia used to hide in his closet. He used to have no privacy at all. Those teenage days had been full of frustration. Long after she had finally left, he would still check the closet to make sure he was alone.

Thinking about his lectures usually made his erection go away. He could hear Ulquiorra moving about. A few minutes after the Arrancar left, Ichigo managed to tame his unruly erection. He dressed and climbed downstairs, where Ulquiorra was already having breakfast with everyone. Isshin was also at the table, sipping tea and watching the morning news. Kon was sitting quietly next to Isshin, opposite from the Arrancar.

After everyone had breakfast, they left the house, while Isshin got ready to open the clinic. This time Ulquiorra felt Rukia’s energy only after the sisters had gotten into the bus. The Shinigami stayed further away this time. He didn’t feel like taking the bus either. A Fullbringer, however, wasn’t easy to identify when they suppressed their energy. Any student climbing into the bus could be one. Thus, even if reluctantly, Ulquiorra went after the sisters into the bus. He could feel the Shinigami following them, jumping from one roof to another, just as Ulquiorra would have preferred. He was losing his skill and shape. Normally, he fought or sparred with other Arrancars to retain his speed and agility. Aizen turned a blind eye to minor squabbling amongst Arrancars, even encouraged them in order to establish hierarchy and stop future conflicts. That, however, hardly ever worked with Hollows. They just continued to attack each other chaotically until one of them was dead.

Perhaps he would have luck talking Ichigo into sparring with him. On the other hand, he hadn’t regained his strength yet and it wasn’t certain that Ichigo would bother with him. He could try the older Kurosaki or Urahara, but had a feeling that the two would refuse. He didn’t trust them much either.

Ulquiorra saw the girls off to school and went to hunt. He still had enough food to last him a couple of days, but yesterday, while he had been following Ichigo, he had noticed a few Hollows in the river. He had never eaten Hollows of that type. In fact, that had been the first time he had seen them since there were no lakes or rivers in Hueco Mundo. That particular species was probably only found in the Human World. Ulquiorra wasn’t certain, but it seemed that these particular Hollows had adapted to hunt either Humans or fish and other water animals. Humans probably didn’t even realize why some of them drowned in various water sources.

In about thirty minutes, Ulquiorra had fished out three strange Hollows from the river. They were small in size and of weird shapes with an unusual smell. Still, they were clusters of spirit particles and seemed edible.

Ulquiorra carried the third fishlike Hollow to the other two on the river bank that he had caught earlier. When he reached the spot, he noticed a Hollow lurking not too far away, staring at his prey. The little Hollow had good self-preservation instincts and didn’t come any closer, even though it was obviously hungry. Ulquiorra gathered his catch and, just before leaving the river, noticed the little Hollow dive into the water. He wondered if it had ever thought about fishing earlier.

The Kurosakis’ house was close to the fishing spot he had chosen, but he was only half-way there when he suddenly felt a familiar spell of dizziness coming. This time was worse than the previous two: he blacked out. Just before that, he could feel his energy fluctuating, its shape and flow unstable, changing randomly, rising higher.

When he came to, he was lying on the same roof where he had passed out. He checked his phone and saw that two hours had gone by. The unusual Hollows he had caught were still beside him. The next time this happened, he might not be so lucky. A random Hollow or Shinigami might come to check what the unstable power discharges were. Now the flow of his energy was stable again even though he could tell that there was something a little unusual about it. He couldn’t quite pinpoint what it was, though.

Ulquiorra picked up the three Hollows again and flash-stepped to the Kurosakis’ house. He was just in time to see Urahara Kisuke climb into Ichigo’s room through the window. Curious, Ulquiorra hovered above the house then followed him. The former captain was already making himself comfortable on the red-head’s bed.

“What are you doing here?” Ulquiorra asked, floating down from the windowsill and to the floor.

“Who? Me?” Kisuke asked. He gave the Arrancar a long, searching look. “I just came for a visit.”

Ulquiorra ignored the stare. “Through the window?” he grunted. “When Ichigo is away at his…university or whatever the place is? Spare me.”

Kisuke fanned himself leisurely and watched the other man. “Don’t ask me if you already know the answer.” He motioned at the Hollows Ulquiorra was carrying. “That’s quite an interesting species you have there.”

“Yes, I discovered it only yesterday.”

Kisuke hummed, closing his fan. He scratched his chin with it and slid off the bed. “I’ll visit Isshin while I’m at it.”

Ulquiorra wondered if Urahara had kept watch over him while he had been unconscious. It didn’t really matter, though, since the former captain had his own reasons to do so.

“So what will happen to me?” Ulquiorra asked before Kisuke could head downstairs.

Kisuke turned around. He shrugged. “Who knows?”

TBC


	13. Part 13

Thanks for the comments :)

**The Heart in My Hand**

by chayron (lttomb@yahoo.com), beta-read by Ash

Part 13

The rest of the week passed without major incident, the days calm and uneventful yet filled with excitement. They adopted a black and white kitten on Thursday, named her Nori, and spent the entire Friday afternoon playing with her. Every time she saw Ulquiorra, her fur would rise, but Ulquiorra kept his distance from the little creature and, by Sunday, the kitten was no longer bothered by the Arrancar’s presence.

There was still no news on Akira Kawaguchi, the mastermind behind the kidnapping attempt. Ulquiorra had fallen into the routine of seeing the sisters to and from school. The time in-between was spent wandering around and hunting, even though he had stopped eating as much. Ulquiorra’s left arm had healed as well, leaving no scars or traces of ever being injured.

Ichigo used the weekend to get much needed sleep. The uncanny incident when Ulquiorra flirted with him left Ichigo sleepless for the few previous nights. However, nothing of the sort happened again, the Arrancar acting as per usual. By the end of the week, Ichigo started thinking that he might have misunderstood or imagined something.

Orihime visited daily, bringing buns and asking about Ulquiorra’s health. Ichigo was getting exceedingly concerned about her obvious attraction to the Arrancar. Why did Orihime keep falling for troublesome characters? As if he or Kon wasn’t enough, now an Arrancar. What was going on in that beautiful head of hers? Ulquiorra, on the other hand, didn’t notice or simply paid no attention to the fact. Yet, it bothered Ichigo even more since the Arrancar always thanked her and was polite to a fault, which didn’t normally happen with anyone else. In fact, it bothered Ichigo so much that on Sunday, when they were visiting Kisuke, he waited for a chance to be alone with the former captain to ask questions that he never thought he’d ask in his lifetime.

“Is there any chance for an Arrancar to become interested in a Human?”

From across the table, Kisuke gave Ichigo a confused look, his fan stopping midway. “Huh?”

“I mean romantically,” Ichigo added to clarify. Kisuke’s face shone with unconcealed curiosity and Ichigo groaned mentally.

“Are you talking about Ulquiorra?” the former captain asked, his fan continuing to work. “Did something happen?”

It was embarrassing to talk about, and Ichigo put his elbows on the table, unconsciously covering his eyes with his hands. “Umm…sort of. It seems like Orihime…” Looking at Kisuke through the grates of his fingers, he trailed off. “…That she likes him.”

“And?”

“And nothing,” Ichigo said, even more embarrassed. “I was just wondering if anything could come out of it.”

The former captain shrugged, unconcerned. “Well, I suppose it depends on Ulquiorra’s taste. No pun intended,” he said chuckling at the look on Ichigo’s face. “Does he respond?”

“Ugh. No, I don’t think so. Or maybe he does? What do I know about Arrancars? And there was that time in the hot spring with Yoruichi and… Ahh…” Ichigo’s rambling trailed off at the angry look on Kisuke’s face. 

“Did he do anything?”

Ichigo shook his head quickly. “No, it wasn’t like that. She was in the spring, naked. Her…well, her chest on display as usual.” He held out his hands in front of him to vividly describe its ampleness. “And he… I mean even I didn’t know where to look!” Ichigo finished, his face turning red. He lowered his hands back to his sides. “He threw her a towel.”

Lowering his hat to cover his face, Kisuke leaned away from the table. He sighed. “Well, even if you tell me, I can’t do anything about it. That’s just how she is.”

Ichigo shook his head. “I know. That’s not the point. I was just wondering if it’s… I mean, he’s an Arrancar and Orihime is… Ahh…” he sighed, deflating even more. “Is that even possible?”

Kisuke pushed up his hat with his fan. “Basically, you’re asking if Ulquiorra can be sexually active?”

“Ugh,” Ichigo grunted uncomfortably, Ulquiorra’s soft, seductive voice surfaced in his memory. He felt his face heat up again. “Err… I suppose?”

“He can,” Kisuke confirmed. “This rarely works with Hollows since many of them don’t even have a gender, or, if they do, they consider each other food and not an object of sexual or romantic interest. Even if they feel attracted to each other, there’s also the matter of different species and subspecies. They rarely, if ever, have offspring.”

“I see. And Arrancars?”

“Arrancars are a completely different matter,” Kisuke told Ichigo. “It’s a new species and Aizen was immensely interested in their behavior. He’s catalogued tons of material concerning the issue. His study, however, isn’t complete.”

Ichigo’s expectant look made Kisuke pause and take time to arrange the information in his head before sharing it with Ichigo; it had been some time ago that he had read the research documents. 

“It seems that lower rank Arrancars were mostly interested in fighting each other,” he started, “just as Hollows. All Arrancars have the needed reproductive organs, but they weren’t very sexually active or interested in sex in general. Aizen tried to make the higher ranks reproduce naturally, but there weren’t many female Arrancars and those present showed no interest. I’ll need to check again, but I think his plans to breed them artificially ended at the same time as his invasion into Seireitei.”

“That’s just as well,” Ichigo concluded. “If there had been any more of them, we’d have lost.”

Kisuke nodded. “Yes, we’d have been very troubled.”

“So you’re saying there’s not much of a chance for Ulquiorra to become attracted to Orihime?”

“Err... I didn’t say that,” Kisuke denied, dashing Ichigo’s hopes away. “Normally, Arrancars aren’t interested in other species but, just as Humans or, for that matter, Shinigami, they can’t control or choose who they become attracted to. There are various records concerning that.”

“Records?” Ichigo asked with apprehensive curiosity. “Are there any records of Arrancars...going for Humans?”

“No, there aren’t any documented cases.”

“I see,” Ichigo said, relieved. “What about Hollows? Do they...well, with Hollows?”

Kisuke waved his fan in front of him. “No, no,” he denied. “None of the Arrancars normally ever consider a Hollow anything more than food or a slave.”

Ichigo nodded. That was what Ulquiorra had told him. Ichigo wondered whether or not he should question Kisuke further. This did feel like he was getting into Ulquiorra’s personal matters behind his back. The red-head could not help his curiosity, though. “What about Arrancars and Shinigami?” he asked.

Kisuke glanced at the door. “Ermm... Aizen documented one case like that. It is surprising, but Arrancars and Shinigami are genetically closer than Arrancars and Hollows. That particular relationship, however, was more an exception than a rule. Most Arrancars just intermingled with each other.”

“Must have been tough," Ichigo commented, "if we keep in mind that there were so few females. That’s probably why they fought each other so much.” Kisuke gave him a strange look. "What?"

The former captain shook his head. "No, nothing," he said, hiding a smile behind his fan.

“And what about Ulquiorra?" Ichigo whispered, leaning forward. "Any records about him?"

“Ahh...” Kisuke drawled, scratching the back of his head with his fan awkwardly. “That record I told...”

There was a knock on the door and Karin’s head popped into the doorway. “We’re going home. I have football practice in an hour. Are you coming?”

Ichigo sighed. “Football practice? On Sunday?”

Karin rolled her eyes. “Yes, it’s been like this for the past four years. So are you coming or what?”

Ichigo wanted to continue the conversation and looked across the table to Kisuke. Now there was a book in front of him and he was busily reading it. Without even raising his head, he waved at Ichigo with his fan, indicating for him to go.

Ichigo nodded. “Yeah, I’m going,” he told Karin. He started rising from the table when Kisuke’s hand caught his sleeve. 

“Ten thousand yen, please,” the former captain said, holding his palm up.

Ichigo grunted and sat back down at the table. “Right, the phone. But he doesn’t even need it. He only uses it to check the time.”

“He can also use it to call and warn you that he’s going to be late,” Kisuke said, not lifting his head, seemingly lost in the importance or thrill of the book. Therefore, Ichigo’s long, cynicism-filled look was wasted on him. “It is also completely free to use,” Kisuke added. “You won’t find any other phone like it.”

Seeing that there was no way around this, Ichigo pulled his wallet out. He had prepared the money in advance but had hoped Kisuke would either forget or refuse to take it.

“This is racketeering,” Ichigo muttered, holding out the bills. He watched Kisuke’s fingers wrap around them.

“I’ve got two hungry mouths to feed,” the former captain said softly. “I wish they would just catch their own food like Ulquiorra.”

Ichigo frowned at the thought. “Cost aside, our fridge looks like it’s straight out of a nightmare. At least he’s stopped eating so much.” He folded his wallet and stood up. “I think he’s almost back to normal, only that his Hollow mask is some-”

“Are you coming or not?” Karin interrupted him impatiently.

“Yeah, yeah,” Ichigo grunted, turning to the door. “See you later, Kisuke.”

“Bye, bye.”

\- - -

His dinner forgotten, Ichigo twirled his chopsticks absently between his fingers. From across the table, he stared at Ulquiorra’s Hollow mask. There was obviously something wrong with it even if the Arrancar himself didn’t seem to be concerned about it. Ichigo wasn’t certain how it worked, but he was sure that with the help of high-speed regeneration, the mask should have healed at about the same time as Ulquiorra’s arm. As long as it wasn’t a fatal blow crushing the mask altogether, they regenerated quite easily. Kisuke had once told him that it was similar to a Human’s nail. The part that was not attached to the body could be chipped or scratched and the Hollow didn’t feel much. On the other hand, if one tried to tear the mask off or cut deep enough that it reached the tissue beneath, it was a completely different matter. 

Ichigo had seen Hollows and Arrancars with chipped masks before. He supposed that they didn’t have their high-speed regeneration anymore or something else was wrong with them, but that was not the case with Ulquiorra. Ichigo couldn’t figure out why, instead of knitting together, the edges of the mask continued to crumble.

“You’re disturbing my meal,” Ulquiorra told Ichigo. “Stop staring.”

“Ah, sorry,” Ichigo said, lowering his eyes to the bowl of rice in front of him. “I didn’t notice I was.” He stuffed some rice into his mouth. “But really, it looks like your mask is getting worse.”

“Mm.”

“Are you sure you’re alright?”

“It’s fine, it’s supposed to be like this.”

“I know you’re lying.”

“I wouldn’t.”

Sighing, Ichigo leaned back in his chair. Again, he was getting nowhere. He had to ask Kisuke about this. But surely, Kisuke wasn’t blind – he would have said something already if it were bad, especially with Orihime having asked him about it no less than five times.

“Whatever,” Ichigo finally decided, digging back into his food.

ooOoOoOoo

Nori skidded across the floor in the corridor and shot into the kitchen, where Ichigo almost stepped on her. He lifted the plastic bags he was carrying higher and kicked the ball the kitten had been chasing further into the kitchen. The enthusiastic thumping of small paws across wooden floor continued. Ichigo turned towards the fridge to store the food from the bags he was carrying. He noted that the parts of Hollow wrapped in cloth didn’t have any impact on him. He had gotten used to this exclusive dish. The red-head was closing the fridge, when, just to spite himself, he imagined Ulquiorra cutting a Hollow into pieces: hands, fingers, neck, eyes, genitals, hair. What did Ulquiorra do with eyeballs? Were there any bones left? Did he bury them in their yard? And why in the world didn’t these thoughts bother him anymore?

“You look creepy,” Karin told him. She had come to the kitchen to play with Nori and was now watching her brother from the doorway.

“You don’t know the half of it,” Ichigo said. He looked around the kitchen and spotted Nori fruitlessly trying to retrieve the ball from under the TV stand. He walked over to it and, after some struggle, managed to rescue the ball with his slipper. He threw it across the floor and watched the kitten scurry after it and past Yuzu, who had just entered the kitchen. 

It was almost dinner time already. Yuzu quickly arranged the products from the fridge onto the table and distributed the food preparation tasks between her siblings. Ichigo glanced at the door leading to the clinic. At the moment, Isshin had a patient who had come in to change his dressing. It seemed that he had cut himself on a barbed fence while helping his father on a farm.

“Where’s Ulquiorra?” Ichigo asked when dinner was ready.

“Mm… Why?” Karin said, following Nori with her eyes. The kitten was walking towards her food bowl.

“He’s usually back before dinner,” Ichigo said. “I don’t think he went hunting either – the fridge is stuffed.”

Karin shrugged. “I don’t know, after seeing us home, he just went off somewhere as usual.”

The door to the clinic opened and Isshin appeared. He inhaled the smell of dinner and smiled brightly, the sight of gaping wounds and red throats forgotten instantly.

“So how was your day?” he asked, walking to the kitchen tap to wash his hands.

“Everything went well,” Yuzu said, sitting down at the table. “Is he alright?” she asked, referring to the patient Isshin had changed the dressing for.

Isshin nodded. He took the towel off the hook and dried his hands. “The tear is healing nicely. He’ll have to come in for the next few days to get it dressed again, though.”

“And Mrs. Funaki?” Karin asked.

“Oh, her flu passed a few days ago. She brought her son in today with the same flu. I think her husband is next.”

Ichigo listened to the lighthearted conversation flow above the table. He joined in a few times to contribute his own experiences of the day but his thoughts kept scattering. He was still wondering why Ulquiorra was late – the Arrancar always showed up before dinner. It was surprising, but Ichigo had started thinking that Ulquiorra liked the atmosphere during dinner.

In the end, the red-head came to the conclusion that Ulquiorra was most likely at Kisuke’s. However, further into the evening, there was still no sign of Ulquiorra, and after phoning Kisuke, it appeared that the Arrancar hadn’t visited him. They started wondering if he had been attacked by a Hollow again. That didn’t seem very likely since Ulquiorra was strong enough to fend off any Hollow, but the incident when his arm had been hurt proved that the Arrancar could be careless. Or maybe he had been attacked by another Arrancar. There hadn’t been any significant reiatsu discharges, though, so Ichigo was inclined to reject this version.

\- - -

It was midnight when Ulquiorra returned. Quietly, from his seat on the sofa, Ichigo watched him pass the kitchen wall and head straight to the fridge. Ichigo noted that he had returned empty-handed. The red-head gently took the sleeping cat off his lap and lowered her onto the sofa. Then he pocketed his phone, which he had been playing a game on, and walked towards Ulquiorra.

“Did something happen?”

Ulquiorra arranged the frying pan and a plate of meat on the stove. He shrugged. “Not really.”

“You could have phoned and told us that you were going to be late – we were worried.”

Ulquiorra wasn’t meeting Ichigo’s eyes and, expectant, the red-head leaned on the counter.

“I lost it,” Ulquiorra said somewhat awkwardly, but without much remorse. He turned on the burner and set the pan on it.

“Lost what?” Ichigo wanted specifications. “Your common sense?”

“No, not that. The phone.”

Ichigo was getting annoyed. “You can’t lose things so easily. It wasn’t even yours – I paid for it.”

“I know.”

Ready to snap, Ichigo waited for Ulquiorra to add that he hadn’t even wanted the phone, but Ulquiorra stayed silent. Sighing, Ichigo rubbed his forehead. “Where did you lose it?”

“If I knew that, it wouldn’t be lost.”

“Listen, I’m not in the mood for this,” Ichigo said angrily. Ulquiorra didn’t answer again and Ichigo just stared as the Arrancar arranged the meat on the pan and added spices to it. He doubted Ulquiorra had gotten rid of the phone on purpose, but it still annoyed him.

“So where were you?” Ichigo asked. He left the counter and returned to the sofa. Nori meowed sleepily and pressed herself against Ichigo’s thigh when he sat down and fell asleep again.

“Out of the city,” finally came the reply.

Ichigo wondered if the Arrancar was being dismissive with him. He realized that this made him feel upset. Nori began to purr while being stroked. What did Ulquiorra care about worrying other people? Did he even understand the concept of others being worried about him? He had been sitting on the sofa, like some faithful wife, waiting for Ulquiorra to return, and now he didn’t even have the right to preach. What could he say to Ulquiorra? True, he had saved the man’s life. However, he had taken it away before, and now he had to be grateful to Ulquiorra for saving his sisters. No matter how Ichigo looked at it, now _he_ was the one in Ulquiorra’s debt.

Both Ichigo and Nori started in surprise at the loud clang when the frying pan and several spoons fell onto the floor. Chunks of sizzling meat and burning oil splattered across the floor. Ulquiorra was trying to turn off the burner, but he couldn’t quite grasp the knob with his shaky fingers. Swaying, he stepped onto one of the sizzling lumps of the meat, slipped and grabbed at the counter for support. That didn’t work so well since his hands had no strength in them at all and he fell down sideways onto the floor.

While rushing to Ulquiorra’s side, Ichigo could feel that there was something off with the Arrancar’s reiatsu – it was fluctuating strangely. He could hear the cat hissing behind him.

“What’s wrong?” Ichigo asked, leaning down to Ulquiorra, kicking the hot pan further down the floor, away from them. There was no answer and, not certain what to do, he hovered above Ulquiorra. The Arrancar was staring at the sideboard in front of him. Ichigo wasn’t able to see his face well, and tried to turn the other man on his back. That turned out to be a very strenuous task – he had not expected Ulquiorra to weigh so much. When he finally managed to do so, Ulquiorra’s hazy eyes concentrated on him then slid past Ichigo’s shoulder.

“Turn off the burner,” he muttered. “Go away.”

“To hell with the burner,” Ichigo grunted, shaking his head impatiently. “What’s wrong with you?”

“Stubborn as always,” Ulquiorra said, closing his eyes. His reiatsu was running wild now and it was dangerous for Ichigo to stay close to him while in his body. “I think…”

Ulquiorra didn’t finish his sentence, his face going slack and his body limp. His energy levels suddenly dropped to almost non-existent and his clothes started flickering then disappeared altogether. Ichigo could hear the house waking up, feet hurriedly rushing into the kitchen and he grabbed a hand towel off the counter. After throwing it over Ulquiorra’s midsection, he leaned down and tried to pick him up. He wasn’t even able to move him off the floor. Ichigo turned his head to Karin and his father, who had just rushed into the kitchen. They gaped at the sight of the nearly naked Arrancar lying amidst half-cooked chunks of meat and splattered oil and Ichigo leaning above him.

“My badge is…” Ichigo started, but at the sight of Kon, trailed off. He moved forward and grabbed the plushy bear. He pulled out the pill and swallowed it. 

“What happened?” Isshin asked, watching his son pick the Arrancar up off the floor. He walked over to the stove and turned the burner off.

“He collapsed,” Ichigo said. He carried Ulquiorra to the sofa. “Was cooking one moment and was down on the floor the next.”

“Is he injured?”

Ichigo shook his head. “Not that I can see.” He laid the Arrancar down onto the sofa.

“Karin, get a bed sheet or something to cover him,” Isshin instructed at the sight of the towel shifting.

With a roll of her eyes, Karin hurried out of the kitchen.

“I think I’d better call Kisuke,” Isshin said when he felt the Arrancar’s reiatsu pick up again and shift strangely. “He’s more knowledgeable on these matters.” He headed towards the door then turned to look at Ichigo again. “Don’t let Karin or Yuzu near him. While his reiatsu is this unstable, it can seriously harm them.”

“Yes, I know,” Ichigo said with a nod.

Barefoot, Yuzu appeared in the kitchen, took one look at Ulquiorra, and rushed off somewhere. Soon Karin came in with a plaid. Ichigo took it and sent her to calm down Yuzu and go back to sleep. He knew they wouldn’t, though.

Kon grunted and stepped back when Ulquiorra’s reiatsu shot up. “Maybe he’s trying to self-destruct?” he muttered. The pressure was getting more and more intense. It was starting to feel as if someone was trying to strip off his skin.

“What in the world are you saying?” Ichigo asked.

“Well, maybe he realized he has no chance of catching us off-guard so he decided to explode himself and us altogether?”

“Just go to my room,” Ichigo said with a sigh. “It’s getting dangerous.”

Kon grunted derisively. “If his reiatsu goes out of control completely, neither your room nor the entire street will be safe.”

Ichigo knew Kon was right and his head kept turning towards the door while he waited desperately for Kisuke to appear, even though he knew the former captain wouldn’t come so quickly. Kon stared at Ulquiorra for a few more minutes, then heeded the red-head’s advice and went to his room.

Ichigo was relieved to finally see Kisuke enter the kitchen with his father in tow. Both of them were still holding mobile phones in their hands and Ichigo realized that they had been conversing right until Kisuke had reached the house.

“How long has he been like this?” Kisuke asked walking directly to the Arrancar on the sofa. He pressed his fingers to Ulquiorra’s temple. The skin was damp and unusually cold.

Uncertain, Ichigo glanced at the clock above the door. “Maybe about forty minutes.”

“Has his reiatsu been fluctuating like this the whole time?”

Ichigo nodded. “More or less. It stops sometimes, but then starts again.”

Kisuke and Isshin gave each other a look. “It’s dangerous to keep him here,” Kisuke said. “I’ll take him to the training grounds under the shop.”

Despite Ichigo not wanting Ulquiorra to be moved anywhere, he had to agree that was the best option. “Any idea what’s wrong with him?” he asked.

Kisuke’s gaze lingered on the Arrancar for some time before he replied. “I have a hunch, but I’m not sure yet. I don’t think this has ever happened before. I’ll need to do a few tests to make sure.”

Ichigo looked at Kisuke with a frown – he had no idea what the former captain was talking about, but it sounded serious. Amongst the many questions that arose in his mind, there was only one that he was able to form clearly: “Is he going to be alright?”

Avoiding his eyes, Kisuke leaned down to gather the listless body off the sofa. “I don’t know,” he said honestly.

ooOoOoOoo

When Ulquiorra opened his eyes, he saw a familiar blue-painted-on sky above. He blinked a few times and sat up. He was on a futon in the Urahara Shop Training Grounds, and he was wearing a Shinigami robe again. He couldn’t exactly remember what happened or why he was here, but he knew that he was hungry. There was a large number of spirit particles in the air and he immediately started absorbing them.

After looking around for a bit, he spotted the hot spring and decided to use the opportunity and soak in it. That was where he was found by Kisuke.

“Seems like you’re doing fine,” the former captain said from the edge while Ulquiorra washed his hair in the spring. “How are you feeling?”

Checking his senses, Ulquiorra took some time to answer. “Hungry,” he finally decided.

“Feel like eating me?”

The Arrancar gave him a surprised look. “Hm? No.” Intrigued, he measured Kisuke from head to toe. That was a little strange.

“Get out of the spring,” Kisuke told him. “We’ll see what we can find in the kitchen.” Then he noticed the Shinigami robe on the ground. “This again. Seems like you do it subconsciously.” He watched Ulquiorra leave the spring. The man picked up the Shinigami robe, frowned at it, and then dispersed the spirit particles. In a second, he was wearing his usual Arrancar outfit again. Kisuke rolled his eyes.

TBC


	14. Part 14

**The Heart in My Hand**

by chayron (lttomb@yahoo.com), beta-read by Ash

Part 14

Ulquiorra stayed unconscious for three days as his energy pulsed chaotically. He lay in the middle of the training grounds, on the futon, not reacting to anything. Kisuke was at a loss of what to do. Then, finally, on Saturday evening, Ichigo received a call from Kisuke saying that Ulquiorra had come around. The former captain didn’t tell him anything else and, not certain what to expect, Ichigo rushed off to Urahara Shop.

When Ichigo entered the guest room, he found Ulquiorra sitting at the table, eating cake while Kisuke read something on his laptop. There was a mug of steaming, hot tea next to him. The relaxed atmosphere hit Ichigo so hard his legs seemed to turn to wood. He had been worrying endlessly this whole time and it appeared that everything was even better than alright. After greeting awkwardly, the red-head somehow reached the table and sat down.

“So what was wrong with you?” he asked Ulquiorra.

The Arrancar gave him a questioning look. “Wrong with me? There was nothing wrong with me.” His fork delved further into the delicious cake.

The offhanded reply suddenly made Ichigo explode in anger. “What are you saying?” he hissed at Ulquiorra’s surprised face. “I was so worried this whole time!” the red-head spat, pouring out the anxiety he had experienced over the last few days. “Why don’t you ever take other people’s feelings into account? I thought you were going to freaking die! Or maybe you were already dead! Again! It’s been three days! Karin and Yuzu kept asking about you! And now you just brush us off?! How dare you! And wh-”

“So you were worried about me?” Ulquiorra wondered, interrupting the tirade.

“Of course I was, you idiot!” Ichigo growled, enraged. “And why do you think I wa-?”

“Really?” Ulquiorra asked again, his fingers playing with his fork, twirling it round and round. “You were worried about me so much?”

There was something disturbing in the Arrancar’s eyes, and Ichigo closed his mouth, his sentence unfinished. He stared back at Ulquiorra, their eyes locked. “Uhh…” the red-head drawled, suddenly subdued. “I mean, everyone was. Right, Kisuke?” he said, turning to the former captain for help.

“Mm?” Kisuke hummed from the depths of his laptop. He reached out for his tea and took a sip. “Of course we were,” he agreed easily. “Especially me. I would go mad with grief if such a fine specimen were to die! Can you imagine what a loss that would be?”

Wondering why he had even expected Kisuke to be of help, Ichigo turned away from him. “Err… Well…” he muttered when those intense green eyes concentrated back on him. Unable to cope with the sudden pressure, Ichigo turned back to Kisuke. “So what was wrong with him?”

“Well, not ‘wrong’ as such,” Kisuke said, lowering his tea back to the table. 

Ichigo grunted. “Not you, too. You can’t convince me everything is alright. He was unconscious for over three days! And look at his mask!” he said, pointing at Ulquiorra’s head. “It’s even more damaged than before.”

Kisuke took a careful look at Ulquiorra’s head. “It is, indeed.” Leaving his laptop, he stood up and rounded the table to come closer to Ulquiorra. He inspected the deteriorating helmet then, in a quick, hardly discernible move, smashed it with Benihime’s hilt. 

Shocked, Ichigo stared as the remains of the mask shattered and fell to the floor with soft jingling sounds. He raised his eyes to Kisuke, then his gaze went to Benihime, then to the left side of Ulquiorra’s head. 

“That wasn’t necessary,” Ulquiorra told Kisuke, giving him an annoyed look. With his fork, he scooped up the piece of cake he had dropped on the table when Kisuke had struck his mask. 

“I’m sorry, I just couldn’t help it,” the former captain said with a chuckle, pointing at Ichigo, who had been stunned into silence. Although Kisuke had only used the handle of his Zanpakuto, Ichigo was staring at him openmouthed.

“Wh-? How? Wh-? Why did you…?” Ichigo was having a hard time making sense of the situation, and his mind was drowning in questions. “What’s going on? And… He should be dead. Why did you do it?” 

“The thing is, this is exactly the reason why it got broken in the first place,” Kisuke explained, eyeing the side of Ulquiorra’s head that used to be hidden by the partial mask. “It was redundant and eventually would have fallen off of its own.”

The white bits and pieces of the mask on the floor seemed surreal. Confused, Ichigo raised his eyes to look at Ulquiorra. The Arrancar shrugged at the questioning look. He brushed the smithereens off the table and to the floor where the rest of them lay.

“I kept telling you that I was not a Hollow,” he said somewhat accusingly.

“But you’re not exactly an Arrancar either,” Kisuke pointed out, amused. “Well, not anymore, that is.”

“Can you slow down?” Ichigo grunted out in bewilderment. “I don’t understand anything at all. What’s going on? What do you mean ‘not Arrancar’?”

“Hm…” Kisuke hummed. “It’s difficult to say what exactly he is now, but you can sense his reiatsu, can’t you?”

“What do you mea-?” Ichigo trailed off when he realized what Kisuke was trying to say. Indeed, there was something wrong with the nature of the energy Ulquiorra was exuding. There were traces of a Hollow, as usual; a hint of an Arrancar, too; but mostly it reminded him of that of a Shinigami’s.

“What the hell is going on?” Ichigo muttered.

“And here,” Kisuke said, reaching out to Ulquiorra’s chest with his fan to spread the collar of his jacket apart. “Take a look.”

There was no sign of a Hollow hole anymore. Just pale, smooth skin. Ulquiorra’s cold gaze was threatening and Kisuke retracted his fan before the other man could start expressing his disapproval, either verbally or physically. The former captain rounded the table to return to his seat.

“Errmh…” Ichigo hummed, trying to get his thoughts in order. He stared at Ulquiorra. “So now you’re a Shinigami? But how is that possible?” he asked and Ulquiorra frowned at him.

“I’m not a Shinigami.” Ulquiorra had a feeling he would be repeating this even more often than the times he had tried to convince everyone he was not a Hollow. The irony of the world.

Kisuke cleared his throat. “No, not a Shinigami,” he agreed. “Not exactly, at least. As said, I don’t think this has ever happened before but… I think now he’s more like you or other Visored in general. Well, not quite, but that’s probably the closest comparison I can give you.”

“Oh. But… Arrancars and Visored, aren’t they…?”

Kisuke nodded. “Yeah, they’re the antithesis of each other. Visored are Shinigami who have obtained Hollow powers, while Arrancars are Hollows who have obtained Shinigami powers. It seems that, at some point, Ulquiorra slipped past that distinctive line. Now he’s more like a Shinigami with Hollow powers. Well, this needs much more investigation into the matter,” he said pointing at his laptop. “I’ve run him through most tests but it’s pretty difficult to say anything else so far.”

Ichigo gave Ulquiorra a careful look, who met his eyes and shrugged. “Hah…” the red-head drawled. He wasn’t certain what to think of this and if it changed anything at all. “So how did this happen?”

“It’s probably not a question of ‘how’, but ‘why’,” Ulquiorra told him. He pushed his cake aside. He didn’t particularly like this conversation since he had always felt distaste for Shinigami. It irritated him to be compared to one. 

“Okay, why, then?” Ichigo prompted when Ulquiorra stayed silent. He turned to Kisuke, who let out a soft chuckle. “Mm?” Ichigo wondered.

Kisuke shook his head without voicing his thoughts. He had a pretty good presumption as to why this had happened to Ulquiorra and found it quite funny. It was going to be much more fun, though, to wait for Ichigo to figure it out on his own.

“I’m sure you can figure it out on your own,” Ulquiorra told Ichigo, mirroring Kisuke’s thoughts. He pointed at his head, now free of the mask, then to the spot on his chest where his Hollow hole used to be.

Ichigo stared at him for several seconds then slapped his fist into his palm as if in realization. “Wow! Now food won’t fall out of you!” he said excitedly. “Congratulations! Now explain,” he demanded, lowering his hands back to his sides in a frustrated motion. “I don’t get it.”

“And how did they even accept you into that…university of yours?” Ulquiorra asked. He held out his right hand to Ichigo.

“Why are you showing it to me?” Ichigo asked. “Is there something wrong with your hand?” He turned to Kisuke, who had giggled again. “Will you stop that and explain this to me?”

The former captain sighed. “Ichigo, all Hollows wear masks which have formed from their lost hearts. The Hollow hole is the place where their heart used to be.”

“Oh,” Ichigo muttered. “That’s right, Rukia told me that a while ago. That’s why the mask is the most vital part of their body.”

Kisuke nodded. “Yes. Arrancars also have the remains of their Hollow mask, which is just as important to them. Now, look at him,” he said, pointing at Ulquiorra.

“Oh,” Ichigo said, amazed, “you got your heart back. How is that even possible?”

Ulquiorra looked at his right hand and shrugged. “I got it back then, right before I died.”

“Really?”

“Yes.”

“Or so he believes,” Kisuke commented. “He also believes it’s in his right hand.”

Curious and confused, Ichigo looked at Ulquiorra’s hand, finally realizing why the other man kept showing it to him. “Huh? Seriously? In your hand?”

Kisuke rolled his eyes. “Of course it’s not there. It’s in his chest, as per usual.”

“It’s not,” Ulquiorra denied.

“Ulquiorra,” Kisuke sighed, as if about to say something for the hundredth time, “I showed you the scans. It’s in your chest. I don’t know why you keep arguing, but it’s clearly not in your hand.”

“It is,” Ulquiorra repeated.

Ichigo reached out to pat Ulquiorra’s hand. “I don’t think he means the same heart as you, Kisuke,” he said with a chuckle. 

“What do you…? Oh,” Kisuke trailed off in realization. He turned to stare at Ichigo. The red-head amazed him sometimes. It was no wonder he had the ability to influence others so much. Ulquiorra was perfectly aware of this as well. There was always some kind of mutual understanding between them, just like now. Ichigo’s fingers were still wrapped around Ulquiorra’s hand, as if it were some kind of a treasure, and Kisuke wondered if Ichigo understood the intimacy of the gesture. Ulquiorra was watching the red-head with an odd look on his face and Kisuke was certain that were there anyone else touching his precious hand, heads would be rolling left and right.

Ah, finally. Ichigo noticed the expression on Ulquiorra’s face. The red-head blinked, his gaze turning shifty, and he retracted his palm awkwardly while blushing in embarrassment. What exactly he was embarrassed about, Kisuke wasn’t able to tell.

“Um…” Ichigo said after a short, uncomfortable pause. Avoiding Ulquiorra’s eyes, he turned to Kisuke. “So it was because of this change that he was unconscious? Is it over now?”

Kisuke shrugged. “I don’t know. These energy fluctuations have been going on for quite some time now and it’s possible that it’s not over yet.”

“For quite some time?” Ichigo repeated. “I haven’t really noti-” he trailed off uncertainly when it occurred to him that he just might have noticed, only that he hadn’t understood what it was. “Is this why you returned home so late the other day?” he asked Ulquiorra. “Why didn’t you just tell me?” he asked again when Ulquiorra stubbornly stared at his half-eaten cake. “Was this why you lost your phone?”

“Well, the biggest transformation has probably already passed,” Kisuke said, since it was obvious that Ulquiorra had no intention of answering. “I don’t think anything more drastic will happen to him. I think it’s more…of a psychological thing.”

“Psychological?” Ichigo wondered. He watched Ulquiorra stare at his cake morosely. The red-head could clearly see that he wasn’t exactly happy about the changes. Ichigo didn’t share the same sentiment. To some extent, he was able to understand why the transformation had happened and was actually glad about it. The psychological changes that Kisuke was talking about must have already transpired, most of them at least, for Ulquiorra to regain his heart. And yet, now he was neither a Hollow, nor an Arrancar, nor a Shinigami. Ichigo wondered if Ulquiorra felt the need to identify himself with any of the races and whether the current situation upset him. The red-head doubted that – while Ulquiorra currently seemed a little misbalanced, he was undoubtedly pleased with his rediscovered heart. The thought made Ichigo smile again. 

“Was this why you refused Orihime’s help?” he asked Ulquiorra.

Stabbing at the cake with his fork, Ulquiorra nodded. “I wasn’t certain if her power to reject a wound would work well when she didn’t have a clear idea of what exactly she was rejecting it from.”

“Yes,” Kisuke confirmed. “I’m pretty impressed you realized that.”

Ulquiorra let out an amused snort. “Really?”

Uh…” the former captain trailed off awkwardly after remembering why Ulquiorra was so well-informed about Orihime’s abilities. He turned to Ichigo. “In order to use her power, she sees the person as a whole and rejects what she thinks shouldn’t be there or what she doesn’t want to be there. Since she knows him only as an Arrancar, she might have unintentionally rejected the processes she wasn’t aware of. That could be dangerous, so it’s best to avoid her powers until he stabilizes completely.”

The red-head watched Ulquiorra tap the side of the cake with his fork. It didn’t seem like he was going to eat anymore. 

“Well, done eating?” Ichigo asked Ulquiorra. It was already late and he wanted to go home. Ulquiorra nodded and Ichigo stood up. He watched Ulquiorra gather up his dishes and leave the room.

“You’ve trained him well,” Kisuke commented when the soft clang of plates being set in the sink reached them.

“He’s actually pretty neat,” Ichigo told him, walking to the door. He moved aside as Ururu passed him. She went to the table to pack the rest of the cake. “Sometimes he also helps around the kitchen,” Ichigo added. He turned to look at Kisuke, who burst out laughing.

“He’s obviously bored,” the former captain said, still chuckling.

Ichigo rolled his eyes. He saw Ulquiorra return from the kitchen. The packed leftovers exchanged hands.

“He could stay here,” Kisuke suggested before they could leave the guest room.

There was something cunning in Kisuke’s voice and both Ichigo and Ulquiorra glared at him in unison.

“No.”

“No, thank you.”

There was a clear warning in Ulquiorra’s emerald eyes. He had not escaped Mayuri just to become a guinea pig again. He had already given Urahara enough liberties. 

“Maybe later, then,” Kisuke said hopefully, not giving in.

Ulquiorra muttered something under his breath and Ichigo decided that they should leave before Kisuke said anything else.

When they returned to the Kurosakis’ house, it was already late in the evening, but no one was sleeping. They were met with surprised looks.

“You seem different,” Yuzu told Ulquiorra, uncertainly. “Are you really alright?”

“Where’s your Hollow mask?” Karin demanded. “What happened to it? Did you get into a fight with some Hollow again?”

Leaving them to question Ulquiorra in the corridor, Ichigo went to the kitchen. His father was watching the late night news at the other end of the room. He turned his head to Ichigo to give him an acknowledging nod and then concentrated back on the TV.

Ichigo crossed the room and flopped down onto the sofa next to his father. “You knew,” he accused, interpreting Isshin’s lack of reaction.

Isshin shrugged. “Well, this is what Kisuke presumed, and it appears he was right.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“It wasn’t certain,” Isshin told him. “It still isn’t.”

They turned to the noise wafting from the corridor.

“What the hell is this?” Kon’s voice demanded. “Are you a Shinigami now? You can’t be a Shinigami! You’re a Hollow! A Hollow!”

There was a shriek and a soft whoosh, and Kon sailed into the kitchen. He passed the whole room in what was probably close to the speed of light and hit the wall just above the TV. He flopped down onto the carpet.

“He doesn’t like being called a Shinigami,” Ichigo informed him belatedly. “I think he hates it even more than being called a Hollow.”

Checking whether any of his plushy limbs had fallen off or not, the bear stood up slowly. “Damn Shinigami!” he declared.

\- - -

They went to sleep after midnight, when all the excitement wore off. Ichigo listened to Ulquiorra shifting around in his futon.

“Can’t sleep?” he asked when the turning and tossing went on for a while.

Ulquiorra grunted something out then shifted again. “I feel strange,” he finally said.

“Anything hurt?”

“No.”

“What do you mean by strange?” Ichigo asked.

The other man stayed silent and Ichigo thought he was just going to ignore the question.

“It’s as if there’s too much of something and not enough of something,” Ulquiorra said after a few moments.

“Oh,” Ichigo grunted. Ulquiorra was probably having difficulties adjusting his senses to the changes that had transpired within him. It was probably going to take quite a while. “But now you don’t feel like eating souls anymore?” he asked carefully.

“I don’t normally ever feel like eating souls,” Ulquiorra told him. 

“But you nearly ate mine.”

In the darkness illuminated only by the light cast by a street lamp outside, Ulquiorra rolled his eyes. “I was hungry and you were there.”

Ichigo frowned. He knew that it was as simple as that and it bothered him. “So when you’re hungry, you’ll just attack anyone?”

“When did I?”

Ichigo knew he was being unfair. Except for that incident, Ulquiorra had never touched anyone during his stay in Karakura, contenting himself only with Hollows.

“Well, you attacked me after all.”

“Let it go already,” Ulquiorra grunted in annoyance.

“It bothers me.”

“Yes, I can see that.”

“Do I look tasty?”

Ulquiorra sat up in his futon. Ichigo just didn’t give up. “Yes,” he said. “You smell like…” he trailed off thinking of a comparison. “What’s your favorite food?”

“Pizza.”

“You smell like pizza, then.”

“I do? Pizza? Really?”

“Yes.”

“That means you still want to eat me,” Ichigo stated after some thought.

“I’m going to hit you.”

“I’ll hit back.”

“Whatever.”

\- - - 

“So, you’re a Shinigami now?” Orihime asked excitedly. Ulquiorra glared at her and, lost, she turned to Ichigo.

“We don’t know what he is, but it’s best not to call him a Shinigami,” Ichigo advised her. “Even if he might be one,” he added carefully.

Ichigo watched Orihime smile brightly and wondered what exactly she was thinking. Undoubtedly, she was happy about Ulquiorra. She probably thought that she now had more chances. Ichigo doubted that – Ulquiorra had no plans to stay in the Human World.

As soon as Orihime left, Uryu arrived. There were still a few buns left and Ichigo took them to the coffee table near the sofa in the living room. Uryu sat down and, soon, carrying two mugs with tea, Ichigo joined him.

“Amazing,” Uryu said, taking a bun, “not only are you alive, but he’s also turned into a Shinigami. You’ve still got it!”

“Got what? And he’s not a Shinigami,” Ichigo protested.

“Well, whatever he is, he’s now further away from the dark side.”

Ichigo sipped his hot tea carefully and lowered the mug back to the coffee table. “I think he’s on no one’s side. Or maybe Ulquiorra’s side. He still thinks I’m food. He said I smelled like… What’s your favorite food?”

“What? Why? Mackerel.”

“He said I smelled like ma…” Ichigo gave an incredulous and disappointed look to his friend. “I don’t smell like that. He said I smelled like pizza.”

“Pizza? Why pizza?” Uryu asked, leaning over to take a sniff at Ichigo. “It’s more like unwashed socks.”

“Go to hell.”

“Anyway, what is Urahara saying?”

“He says it’s never happened before and he doesn’t know what to expect.”

Uryu looked surprised. “I’d expect more of him.”

Ichigo leaned back into the sofa, getting more comfortable. “Well, he says that Arrancars are a new species that have barely existed for more than a decade. It seems like there’s no information on them except for what’s catalogued by Aizen. And now he isn’t even an Arrancar anymore. Well, not quite at least.”

“What does Ulquiorra think about this?” Uryu wondered.

“He thinks that I’m tasty.”

Uryu rolled his eyes. “Stop complaining already. If he hasn’t tried to eat you again, he won’t. If anything, he’d just choose an easier target. Safer to digest so to speak.”

“Pfft.” Amused, Ichigo chuckled. “Yeah, as if. Shows what you know of him.”

ooOoOoOoo

“He’s found his phone,” Ichigo announced enthusiastically as soon as he entered the guest room.

“Hello,” Kisuke greeted, not showing much joy about the news and not even raising his eyes from his laptop screen. He scrolled down the page and continued reading.

“Hey,” Ichigo greeted as well. He crossed the room and sat down at the opposite end of the table. “It seems he took it to heart,” he gushed cheerfully. “I told him he shouldn’t lose things so easily. He must’ve been out searching for it all this time.”

The former captain’s face lacked expression and Ichigo deflated somewhat. Recently, Ulquiorra had been more sociable and much more inclined to share his thoughts and ideas with Ichigo. The red-head was very content with that.

“He’s been out killing Hollows,” Kisuke finally said, pushing his laptop aside. “He’s threatened to kill every Hollow in Karakura if his phone doesn’t appear. He’s been causing terror and panic amongst Hollows for the last three days. It seems they finally had enough brains to return it.”

Ichigo stared at him. “Oh, it was stolen. I didn’t know,” he muttered, his enthusiasm gone completely. “Killed them? That’s way overdoing it. It’s just a phone…”

“It’s not a matter of justice,” Kisuke said carefully. “It’s about boundaries. He won’t forgive Hollows trying to step over an Arrancar.”

“But he’s not an Arrancar anymore,” Ichigo said. “Why play these dominance games?”

Kisuke shook his head. “It’s not what you think. Nothing’s changed for him. I don’t believe he’ll ever consider himself a Visored or a Shinigami. No, never a Shinigami. I think he’s killed more than twenty Hollows over these past few days and...”

Ichigo looked completely disappointed and Kisuke sighed. “Well, he probably got the phone back because of the reasons you’re thinking of but… Ichigo, this change hasn’t affected his personality. It’s the opposite - the change has happened exactly because he has that kind of personality.”

“I know that,” Ichigo protested.

“Yet you seem to have some sort of misconception,” Kisuke said with a shrug. “His becoming more like a Shinigami instead of a Hollow didn’t make him different inside. Not yet at least.” Kisuke pressed a hand over his chest. “Shinigami are faulty too – they can be ambitious, greedy, scheming, just like Humans or Hollows. Aizen is the perfect example. If anything, Ulquiorra’s personality may change for the worse, or he’ll slip back into being an Arrancar.”

“Could he?” the red-head asked.

Kisuke shrugged. “That’s highly unlikely, but I can’t guarantee it won’t happen.” He watched Ichigo, who was musing over his words. “As an Arrancar, he lacked certain emotions, but he compensated with reasoning and logic. Now his heart is back, meaning that all of that has been turned upside down. He’s still the same, but now he has to cope with additional stress. He’s quiet and doesn’t talk about himself so it’s difficult to say what he’s thinking. You’ll have to make sure he doesn’t get lost in his emotions like Aizen did.”

“He seems fine to me.” Ichigo sighed. “I think the only one who’s getting lost in his emotions is me.”

TBC


	15. Part 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not like or see the need to use the Spanish names for the Arrancar attacks or their combos, thus they will be changed into English or Japanese equivalents.

**Thank you for your kudos :)**

 

**The Heart in My Hand**

by chayron (lttomb@yahoo.com), beta-read by Ash

Part 15

_Make sure he doesn’t get lost in his emotions._

Easy for Kisuke to say. Ichigo frowned at Ulquiorra, who was sitting on his futon, getting ready to go to sleep. He was tinkering with his mobile phone. 

“How are you feeling?” Ichigo asked him. He was sitting on his bed, only in boxers.

The other man raised his head to look at him. Recently, Ichigo had become exceedingly interested in him. He had a feeling that this overflowing concern was Urahara’s doing.

“I’m fine.”

Ulquiorra raised an eyebrow when, after a moment of hesitation, Ichigo sat down next to his futon. The color on the red-head’s face changed from white to pink then back again. This was going to be interesting.

“Is there something you want to talk about?” Ichigo asked, scratching his bare chest awkwardly. “Erm…”

Ulquiorra stared at him for a few moments then lowered his phone to the floor. “Yes,” he said to Ichigo’s expectant face. “How about we talk about why you’ve been acting like an idiot lately?”

“Ah.” Ichigo shifted awkwardly. Unsurprisingly, Ulquiorra had suspected something was up. Now there was no way around it. After all, honesty was the best policy, or something like that anyway. “We’re worried that you might have difficulties with coping with new emotions.”

Ulquiorra’s emerald eyes blinked at him. “Who, me? Emotions? What emotions?”

“New emotions.”

Ulquiorra was still giving him a confused look, and Ichigo mentally cursed Kisuke. “Mmnn… Well, we thought that, maybe, with the occurring changes, you’d have a hard time adjusting.”

“You mean you’re afraid that I will become mentally unstable,” Ulquiorra clarified.

“Err…” the red-head drawled uncertainly. Ulquiorra didn’t even look upset. He went right past and was now bathing in a weird mix of rage and amusement. “It’s not exactly that. We just…”

“Tell Urahara,” Ulquiorra spat, “that if he keeps this up, it will be him who will have a hard time adjusting to the changes after I run him through with my Zanpakuto.”

“That’s a pretty long sentence,” Ichigo said jokingly.

“I’m sure you’ll remember it, since it seems that you’re not having trouble with your emotions. Only with that Hollow, and Shinigami, and Quincy, and… What else do you have?”

“Fullbringer,” Ichigo supplied him mournfully.

“Oh right, how could I have forgotten? Must be my emotions acting up.”

Ichigo groaned. “Okay, forget I ever asked.”

Ulquiorra snorted softly, as if showing that he was ready to consider a truce. So as not to dispel the ceasefire, Ichigo kept quiet for a few moments. His gaze traveled to Ulquiorra’s head. Without his Hollow mask, Ulquiorra looked odd. In fact, it was not that he looked odd, but Ichigo was used to seeing the white mask and horn there, attached.

The hair that used to be hidden by the mask seemed to be darker than the rest. Curious, Ichigo reached out to touch the strands. They felt smooth under his fingers. The difference in color was probably due to the hair there not getting as much sunlight as the rest. 

Ulquiorra sat still, letting Ichigo satisfy his curiosity then reached out as well, his hand settling on the back of Ichigo’s head. The red-head’s eyes widened slightly when Ulquiorra’s hand slid down to his nape and ruffled through the short hair there. He had been careless.

The palm offered light pressure and brought Ichigo’s head closer to Ulquiorra’s. Ichigo still didn’t know how to react when, wasting no time, Ulquiorra’s mouth pressed to his. He felt surprised, but, in all honesty, he had expected this. Ulquiorra was massaging his nape in a strange blend of soothing and demanding motions. Then Ulquiorra bit on his lower lip, demanding entrance, and Ichigo let him in.

What surprised Ichigo most was that Ulquiorra was good at kissing. He couldn’t even begin to imagine where or due to whose courtesy Ulquiorra had picked up a skill like this. The red-head, on the other hand, didn’t have much experience. He even felt cheated somehow.

Awkwardly, Ichigo answered the kiss. It did feel good. Ulquiorra was still massaging his nape and it felt exhilarating. When they finally broke the kiss and Ulquiorra leaned away, Ichigo’s face flushed red. Wiping his mouth, the red-head muttered under his breath. His thoughts were chaotic and he thought that maybe he should be asking Ulquiorra why he had kissed him, but that seemed stupid. He neither wanted to protest nor ask – he knew that he had brought this on by himself. He had been careless not making his stance and Ulquiorra had just felt like doing it. Maybe Ulquiorra thought he had been intentionally provoked.

And then the other man was kissing him again, now firm and daring. It was how Ichigo imagined a man would kiss; it didn’t remind him of Orihime’s tentative kisses at all. And, since he had lost his chance to protest during the first kiss, he simply went with the flow.

Ulquiorra’s hands turned as daring as his kisses and were now roaming over Ichigo freely, touching, squeezing. Ulquiorra’s mouth traveled to his neck, lips brushing over the sensitive skin there, teeth grazing lightly. The hands turned even bolder and Ichigo soon realized that Ulquiorra was pushing him down onto the futon. Ichigo pushed at the other man’s chest.

“What are you doing?”

Ulquiorra gave him a confused look. “Sex?” he offered. He became even more confused when this appeared to bother Ichigo. The red-head’s eyes widened as if surprised that this kind of thing led to sex. Well, of course it led to sex, where else would it lead?

Ichigo was excited already, his erection tenting the front of his boxers. Ulquiorra slipped his hand into the underwear and squeezed lightly. Ichigo’s eyes were now so wide they looked like they were about to pop out of his skull. The red-head suddenly became very lively, his hand diving into his boxers as well, trying to slap him away. Ulquiorra let go and pushed Ichigo down onto the futon. Ichigo didn’t seem to like this either and tried to wriggle away. Ulquiorra pressed him down to keep him still. He didn’t understand the problem since the red-head was obviously aroused.

Ichigo struggled, but could feel how meaningless his resistance was. As long as he was in his body, Ulquiorra could hold him down with his little finger. His badge was on the bedside cabinet, Kon was…somewhere. He had the option of shouting for help, but that seemed absurd. His sisters, his father… This whole situation was absurd.

“Let go of me!” Ichigo demanded.

“No.”

“Let go, you bastard!”

“Why would I?”

Ulquiorra’s voice was calm albeit permeated with a strange blend of arousal and aggression. Ichigo felt a familiar panic start to build up, the same that he had experienced in the kitchen, back when Ulquiorra had wanted to test his strength. 

“Let…!” He suddenly punched the air as his hands were unexpectedly released. Ichigo bolted up and over the bed to grab his badge from the bedside cabinet. In his Shinigami form, he turned to Ulquiorra, who was watching him from the futon with his eyebrows raised.

“What are you doing?” Ulquiorra asked.

Ichigo stared at him and suddenly felt like an idiot. He had even drawn his Zanpakuto. Only now, staring at Ulquiorra, he saw that the other man was slowly staring to realize that he had scared him, and it seemed to confuse Ulquiorra even more. Feeling foolish like never before, Ichigo dropped his fighting stance and sheathed his Zanpakuto. He sat on his bed.

“Come here,” Ulquiorra told him, motioning with his hand.

“No.”

Ulquiorra lowered his hand and his questioning look slid over Ichigo’s hakama. “It’s still up,” he stated.

The red-head looked down at his lap. So it was. Amazing. “So what? Men react to anything,” he declared defensively.

“Do they?” Ulquiorra wondered. “I don’t.”

Ichigo slapped his forehead with a soft groan. “Can you not do that?”

“Not do what?”

“Not…” Ichigo flailed his hands around. “Not… Just don’t do that!”

Ulquiorra gave him an amused look, but said nothing. Ichigo played with his badge, trying to make sense of the situation.

“What’s the problem?” Ulquiorra asked. 

Ichigo pursed his lips. There were so many problems that he didn’t even know where to start. Ignoring the question, he climbed off the bed to see how his body was doing. He winced at the sight of his bleeding forehead that had obviously hit the corner of the bedside cabinet. The red-head got a tissue and pressed it to the cut. It was just a scratch, but the bruise was going to shine with all the colors of the rainbow. He sighed.

“So what do I do about this now?”

Ichigo turned to see Ulquiorra pointing at his lap. “Do whatever the hell you want!” the red-head hissed, turning away again. Then he realized that was a bad answer. “But that should not include me!” he added.

“That’s not fair. It’s your fault, after all.”

Ready to snap, Ichigo turned to him again. Ulquiorra was watching him curiously. “Stop staring at me,” Ichigo said.

“You’re being awfully demanding all of a sudden.”

“Me? Demanding?” Ichigo choked with indignation. He heaved up his body and tossed it onto the bed. “Now look here…”

“What’s the racket?!” Karin shouted, kicking at the wall from the other side. “Will you let me sleep?”

Ichigo closed his mouth. He glared at Ulquiorra. “Yeah, sorry!” he shouted back.

\- - -

Ichigo leaned back in the chair and sipped his tea. His sisters had already gone to school, but his lectures didn’t start until ten. His father was already in the clinic; Ichigo could hear him bustling about, getting ready to open. The red-head let out a sigh and took another sip. Damn Kisuke and his meddling. If not for him, nothing like this would have happened.

As if.

Ichigo finished his tea and pushed away the mug. He gently touched the bruise on his forehead. Karin had wanted to put a plaster on it, but he had refused.

Why did he go along with that kiss? No, he knew why. That wasn’t the right question.

_What’s the problem?_

That was the question. Only… Which problem? Was the problem that he had been kissed by a male Arranc-? It wasn’t even clear what he was. Was it that he didn’t even mind being kissed by him, or that he was curious about the whole thing? Was it that Ulquiorra obviously wanted more? Or that he didn’t have a clear stance on any of this? Probably all of them. One huge problem.

As if on cue, Ichigo felt a familiar spark of energy appear somewhere further in town and soon Ulquiorra was walking through the wall and into the kitchen. All requests not to do so had been ignored. He was probably returning from his daily trip of seeing Karin and Yuzu to school.

“Morning,” Ichigo said.

Ulquiorra nodded and headed past him into the corridor. Ichigo could hear him traipsing around, then the sound of steps disappeared into the basement. The red-head’s shoulders relaxed. At least this didn’t make things awkward; Ulquiorra seemed to be acting the same as usual.

Ichigo stood up and went to wash his mug and the plate that he had deposited in the sink earlier. He was done with the washing-up and was wiping his hands with a towel when he heard the basement door open again. He walked to the kitchen door to see what Ulquiorra was up to. His brow rose in surprise at the sight.

“What’s that?” Ichigo pointed at the thing Ulquiorra was carrying.

Ulquiorra looked at the peculiar object in his hands. “It’s a weapon.”

“I can see that,” Ichigo agreed, still pointing. It looked like a random log with a sickle attached to it. “Why do you have it?” he asked, hanging the towel back on the rack. He walked into the corridor to take a better look at the weapon.

“I made it.”

Not sure whether Ulquiorra was just stating a fact or being proud of it, Ichigo gave an appreciative nod. “Not bad at all,” he complimented the crude attempt. “But why?” Now there was something strange on Ulquiorra’s face – was he embarrassed? Intrigued, Ichigo waited.

“They disappear.”

“What disappears?”

“Hollows. I can’t use my Zanpakuto anymore.”

Ichigo stared at him. “Oh,” he finally said. “Ooooh,” he said again, his face stretching into an uncontrollable grin. “Oooh,” he repeated, laughing.

Ulquiorra glared at him.

“That’s hilarious,” Ichigo told him, still giggling.

“It’s not,” Ulquiorra denied. “It’s annoying.”

“So if you found a wandering Plus, you could send it to Soul Society?” Ichigo burst out laughing again. “You’re like a common Shinigami now.”

“I’m not a Shinigami,” Ulquiorra spat. Not intending to put up with the red-head’s foolishness, he turned around and marched down the hallway to the door leading outside. He passed straight through it.

Grinning, Ichigo watched him go. His grin faded gradually. These changes meant that Ulquiorra had to rethink how he used his Zanpakuto. Was he even able to change his form? Was his fighting technique still that of an Arrancar or already that of a Shinigami? Or maybe he was able to use both? Ichigo wondered if Ulquiorra had tried to find out. They had to pay a visit to Urahara Shop and its training grounds.

ooOoOoOoo

Suppressing his reiatsu, Kisuke snuck through the Kurosakis’ garden until he reached the kitchen window and peeked inside. Just as Ichigo had told him a few days ago, Ulquiorra was cleaning up the kitchen – he was currently washing the dishes. Trying to hold in his laughter, the former captain wondered if Ichigo would agree to lend him this fine sample of a housekeeper for a few days to help Ururu out.

Silently, Kisuke opened the front door and snuck inside. Ichigo and his sisters were out while Isshin was inside the clinic. Undetected, Kisuke passed the corridor and reached the kitchen.

“Morning,” he said, entering.

To his credit, Ulquiorra didn’t seem surprised or ashamed. He turned his head and nodded in greeting.

“Bluh…blah… Bluh…Blarghh!”

Kisuke’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. Ulquiorra hadn’t opened his mouth, so it was not him making these sounds.

“Bluh… Blaargh… Help!”

From Ulquiorra’s face, Kisuke’s eyes slid down to the froth-filled sink and then to Ulquiorra’s hands. He was washing dishes with Kon.

“Blargh… Bluh… just stand… Help! Blugh… Blahrgh!”

Now Ulquiorra was washing Karin’s favorite bowl and the plushy bear disappeared into the sink again, his voice drowned out by water and froth.

Kisuke approached Ulquiorra. “What did he do now?”

Ulquiorra shrugged and gave a good scrub to a stain on the bowl with Kon’s head.

“Blargh! Nooo! Garbh.. Blugh…blugh!”

The former captain leaned against the sideboard. “I understand that he can be really annoying and noisy, but this is too much,” he said.

“I’ve no interest in that woman,” Ulquiorra said.

Thinking, Kisuke looked at the dirty, frothy water in the sink. Kon had probably been jealous and confronted Ulquiorra about Orihime. The Modified Soul was barking up the wrong tree, though. Ulquiorra really had no interest in Orihime. Kisuke knew for a fact that he was much more interested in Ichigo.

“Still,” Kisuke said, “that’s enough. Let go of him.”

Ulquiorra turned to stare at him with his emerald eyes. “And if I don’t?”

“Ermm…” Kisuke drawled, not wishing to start a conflict leading to a fight.

“It said that you’re useless,” Ulquiorra said suddenly.

“Huh? Who said that? Kon?”

“Yes, it said you’re as useless as last year’s snow.”

“He said that?” Kisuke asked. “Did you?”

A few guilty bubbles rose from the sink indicating that maybe Kon had or hadn’t and that many things might have been said in the heat of the argument.

“Useless,” Ulquiorra repeated, grinning. Now he was washing a pot. “Maybe you are. But I’m not complaining.”

Kisuke pushed himself off the sideboard. Ulquiorra was probably referring to the fact that, as a Shinigami, he should have killed him instead of having helped him recover. Kisuke snorted.

“There’s another dirty cup on the coffee table,” he said before leaving the kitchen.

“Mhm,” Ulquiorra hummed in thanks.

“Blargh! Blargh!” Kon protested.

“Shut up,” Ulquiorra told him. “Why are you so worried? I will give you a good rinse in the washing-machine later. I just have to figure out how to start it.”

“Blargh! Blargh!”

Not listening, Ulquiorra continued washing. He was thinking. Lately, Urahara was an often guest to the eldest Kurosaki. Something was up.

ooOoOoOoo

“Thanks for letting us use the training grounds,” Ichigo was saying to Kisuke. He, Ulquiorra and the former captain were under Urahara Shop, standing in the seemingly vast desert with painted-on sky.

“Don’t mention it,” Kisuke said, walking a little further away to sit at a boulder; it was going to be a long day.

“So I can blow up anything here and it will hold?” Ulquiorra asked.

“Well, it survived Ichigo; it should survive you as well,” the former captain confirmed. “Just don’t aim at the same place repeatedly.”

“So what’s the plan?” Ichigo asked Kisuke, seating himself next to him. Due to security measures, the red-head was in his Shinigami form, having left Kon to look after his body at home.

Kisuke gave him a look. “I thought you were the one with the plan. You were the one who asked to use the training grounds,” he pointed out.

They watched Ulquiorra walk further into the training grounds. “Well,” Ichigo said, “I suppose we just have to find out his current abilities first.”

The former captain nodded. He doubted Ulquiorra knew his own abilities. There was just no way of knowing without trying. The problem was that the transpired changes may not be final.

A common, distorted sound echoed and a green Cero turned a huge boulder to cinders. A swish of air brought a cloud of dust into Ichigo’s eyes while Kisuke covered his face with his fan. Ichigo coughed and rubbed his eyes.

“Okay, so he can still use his Cero,” Ichigo concluded, his throat sore and eyes red. “And it’s as effective as ever.”

Kisuke shook the dust off his fan and lowered it to his lap. He had no doubts that Ulquiorra was still able to use his Cero. He had no doubts that the man was also able to use the rest of his common set of forms and attacks. He was more interested in Ulquiorra’s Zanpakuto, which, obviously, had changed.

“Ah... Eh!” Ichigo muttered insensibly when Ulquiorra released his Resurrection form. The sudden pressure of a hostile reiatsu nearly made him summon his own in response. The need was purely instinctual since Ulquiorra now felt mostly like a Hollow. Kisuke, on the other hand, had not even reacted. He was more interested in the green rain phenomenon that suddenly started falling down onto the sand.

“Just look at those wings,” he told Ichigo after a few moments. He grinned. “He looks like Batman, only with better hair.”

Ichigo rolled his eyes. Ulquiorra’s Resurrection form was slightly different from what he remembered – there were no horns, his body was skinnier and without the Hollow hole, but everything else seemed to be the same. It felt confusing to have Ulquiorra transform without a Hollow mask. Ichigo didn’t quite understand how it was possible.

“Spectacular,” Kisuke said when nearly the entire training ground suddenly turned green at Cero Obscure. The ground shook and clumps of wet sand rose into the air. Ulquiorra made an abrupt motion with his hand, sending it away from himself. Ichigo summoned some of his reiatsu as well before it could hit him in the face.

Ulquiorra was getting ready for the Second Stage, and Ichigo stood up, releasing his Bankai form. “I advise you do the same,” he told Kisuke. “It’s a lot of reiatsu to handle.”

“Yes, I can see that,” the former captain agreed, releasing his Bankai as well; he was certain that he would need to.

Unmoving, taking his time, Ulquiorra checked his senses, making sure his body responded as he remembered. His mask didn’t exist anymore and neither did any variations of it. This, actually, made Ulquiorra more vulnerable. Now he had to protect his chest with the same vigor as his head. 

It seemed that Ulquiorra decided that everything was alright and his head turned to Ichigo.

“Uh-oh,” the red-head said when the yellow eyes concentrated on him. “He wants to play.” He watched Ulquiorra bring his hands together and slowly draw them back in opposite directions, forming a green, double-edged spear.

“Are you sure?” Kisuke asked hesitantly when Ichigo brushed a hand over his face, donning his Hollow mask. Actually, Kisuke wanted nothing more than to observe Ulquiorra in action and see what he was capable of, but it did seem risky.

“It’s fine, we’ll just spar for a bit,” Ichigo told him. He flitted from one boulder to another to land in front of Ulquiorra.

“You are not going to fight me like this, are you?” Ulquiorra asked, amused. The red-head’s Bankai did seem different from the last time he had seen him, but the amount of reiatsu was about the same.

“Yes, I am,” Ichigo nodded stubbornly. “I’ve learned a few new tricks.”

Ulquiorra’s tail made a lazy swish, showing that he wasn’t very interested in those tricks. 

“You seriously don’t think that I would just…” Ichigo trailed off. Ulquiorra obviously did and even looked slightly disappointed. “Are you serious?” Ichigo blinked in disbelief; he suddenly realized he simply wasn’t able to understand how Ulquiorra’s mind worked. “Do you want to die again? I can’t control that form. I can’t even… can’t even…” he just shook his head, not finishing. “That’s out of the question!”

“Is it now?” Ulquiorra said. “Well, surprise me with your new tricks, then.”

Ichigo jumped back to avoid being skewered by the spear. Ulquiorra swung it at the red-head again and he deflected it sideways, kicking out. Ulquiorra stumbled backwards.

“I forgot that you’re good with your feet. Must be my emotions acting up again,” he said, grinning.

“I told you to let it go already,” Ichigo grunted out, defending himself from another attack.

Ulquiorra raised an eyebrow and Ichigo understood that he was going to keep mentioning it until he was no longer reminded of when he had nearly eaten Ichigo’s soul. That was some sort of revenge. Amused, Ichigo laughed.

They had no time to chat, though. The spar was taking all of their concentration. Ichigo quickly had to admit that he himself had forgotten how difficult it had been to fight Ulquiorra. Even though he was in a much better shape now, stronger, more experienced, Ulquiorra still had an advantage over him.

The spear connected with Ichigo’s Zanpakuto, flooding him with short-lived relief. Ulquiorra had put so much strength behind it that it sent Ichigo flying back into a boulder. The other man was instantly there, flash-stepping in front of Ichigo and grabbing his sword hand while, dazed, Ichigo tried to get his bearings. He forced the red-head’s hand to his side, twisting his wrist painfully, making Ichigo yelp and drop his Zanpakuto. He tried to hit Ulquiorra with his free hand but it was suddenly seized as well.

Wondering where his spear had gone, Ichigo stared at him, panting. The red-head could feel the excitement rush through him at their proximity. The Hollow was restless inside him. It had met a challenge, a tease, and it wanted to play as well. Ichigo had only too well an idea of what kind of games it wanted to play. It could not be let out, he could not forget himself.

Ulquiorra was smirking at the red-head, obviously understanding what was going on inside him. “You’re hard,” he pointed out, pressing his hips against Ichigo’s.

“So are you,” Ichigo retorted and heard the Hollow inside him laugh maniacally. He was an idiot. Through the clumps and tufts of fur covering Ulquiorra’s midsection, he could feel him poking his thigh. “Let go of me.”

Ulquiorra chuckled. “You’re being awfully demanding again.”

“I can be much worse than demanding!” Ichigo spat.

“Oh? So maybe you’ll finally show me those new tricks of yours? Because so far I’ve seen nothing of interest.”

With an enraged grunt, Ichigo mustered up the last of his strength and shoved Ulquiorra aside, kneeing him in the midsection. He had been aiming a bit lower, but Ulquiorra had managed to shift to the side a little. He glared at Ichigo but his anger was met by the red-head’s fist, which sent him backwards a few meters.

“You will regret this,” Ulquiorra muttered.

“We’ll see,” Ichigo growled, grabbing his Zanpakuto from the ground and jumping towards the other man at once.

Alarmed, Kisuke watched the fight. Ichigo was tired already, his Hollow mask disappearing, but Ulquiorra was still pushing him. Only now did Kisuke understand that Ichigo had been dead-serious when he had said that Ulquiorra would not have a problem dealing with Mayuri. 

During the entire spar, Ulquiorra hadn’t used his Cero, while Ichigo avoided using Getsuga Tensho. That was some kind of a mutual agreement between the two. Maybe they weren’t certain the training grounds would hold. Kisuke wasn’t so certain it would either.

Ichigo was being driven backwards, defensive now, concentrating only on avoiding being hit. And then the red-head stumbled on a rock and lost his balance, and Ulquiorra’s spear, which was about to hit Ichigo’s shoulder, hit his arm instead. Blood spurted up and his Hollow mask disappeared.

Kisuke was already there, between the two, brandishing Benihime at Ulquiorra, pushing him away from the red-head. He realized at once that he needn’t have interfered but it was too late now. Both Ichigo and Ulquiorra were giving him surprised looks. At the sight of blood, Ulquiorra had lowered his spear but now raised it again.

“You sure you can handle it, Captain?” he muttered threateningly.

Ichigo grabbed the spear, pressing it to the ground and, cursing, let go since it burnt his hand. “It’s alright, it’s just a shallow cut,” he said, gasping for air. “It’s my fault – I tripped. How about we all power down?”

“Him first,” Ulquiorra said, motioning his head to Kisuke.

TBC


	16. Part 16

Thank you very much for the comments and all the kudos ^_^

**The Heart in My Hand**

by chayron (lttomb@yahoo.com), beta-read by Ash

Part 16

“That’s it,” Kisuke said, cutting off the excess of the bandage that he had just wrapped over Ichigo’s left arm. The wound on his bicep wasn’t deep, but it was painful, and would hinder his movements for some time. It was a miracle that Ichigo had managed to avoid more serious injuries. Any further sparring with Ulquiorra was out of the question.

“Thanks,” the red-head said, reaching for his mug of tea with his other hand. He grunted when his palm reminded him that he had burnt himself on the spear. Ichigo looked at his hand, but wasn’t able to see any outward signs of the burn. He had already lost his Hollow mask when he had touched the spear. It was amazing what a huge difference it made while handling others’ reiatsu.

They were in Kisuke’s guest room. Ulquiorra was sitting at the table next to Ichigo, a mug of tea in front of him as well. It was quiet in the room. Since their return from the training grounds, they had all felt uncomfortable. Ulquiorra lifted his mug to take a sip. He was wondering whether asking both men to fight him was worth consideration. Fighting Ichigo alone did not appear to be much of a challenge while fighting both of them at once would probably be too much to handle.

“It should heal nicely in several days,” the former captain told them after a few minutes to break the silence. “Or you can ask Orihime to heal it.”

Ichigo nodded. “Yeah, I will; she’s coming to visit us today.”

Kisuke finished storing the medical supplies he had pulled out back into the medical kit. He closed it, lowered it to the ground, and pushed it under the table. The former captain liked to store things under his tables. If not for Ururu, no one would be able to put their feet under them. Medical kits, dirty plates, half-eaten apples, Kisuke’s socks, houseplants, his laptop, Yoruichi’s underwear, everything found their way under the tables.

Ichigo cast a look at the room. There was a layer of documents covering the ground, and some half-built mechanical monstrosity at the door. All these signs of neglect showed that Yoruichi hadn’t visited in a while.

The men started when Ulquiorra’s phone rang suddenly, breaching the silence. Ichigo and Kisuke watched him answer it.

“Yes?”

“What time, then?”

Ulquiorra removed the phone from his ear to check the time then pressed it back to his ear.

“Yes, no problem,” he said and hung up.

“Who was that?” Kisuke asked.

“Karin,” Ulquiorra answered. “She said that they had some event at school, so her football practice and other activities were cancelled. I’ll have to go pick them up in a bit.”

“I’ll go with you,” Ichigo said.

“So it seems that’s all for today,” Kisuke summed up regretfully.

Ichigo gave him a look. His injury aside, he knew the former captain had something else in mind. Yet, he’d had enough of stress for today. The red-head took his tea to wash down his grimace. Ulquiorra had completely recovered. His body weight had not quite returned to normal yet, but it didn’t seem to influence his combat abilities. The reality of the inevitable visit to Mayuri’s laboratory hung over Ichigo’s head like the sword of Damocles. He was bad at planning and scheming, his forte was straightforward action. He would have to put his trust in Ulquiorra concerning this matter.

“Can’t you summon your mask during a fight?” Ichigo asked, lowering his mug. He straightened his fingers and soothed his stinging palm.

Ulquiorra gave him a confused look. “Mask? What do you mean?”

“Well, if you’re more like a Visored than an Arrancar now,” Ichigo said, “can’t you summon your Hollow mask like Visoreds do?” He reached for his mug again to finish his tea. “It should add to your power even more.”

The room was quiet for some time, then Ulquiorra turned his head to Kisuke, asking him to explain what Ichigo was talking about.

The former captain shook his head. “That’s not how it works, Ichigo. He’s not a Visored. Far from it. I only gave that example to… Well, that’s just the closest comparison there is.” He shrugged. “While in those forms, he’s already fully using his Hollow heritage, he doesn’t need the Hollow mask. Besides, the mask doesn’t exist anymore. He can’t summon it even if he wants to.” Kisuke tapped the side of his mug. “Probably,” he added suddenly to Ichigo’s frustration. “We’ll see after he achieves Bankai.”

“My what?”

“His what?” Ichigo gasped out, wide-eyed, tea running down his nostrils. He was suddenly seized by a coughing fit.

Amused, Kisuke thumped Ichigo’s back a few times to help him recover. While doing so, he grinned at Ulquiorra. “I know that you’ve already considered this. Your Zanpakuto has become nearly identical to a Shinigami’s, and your reiatsu has become similar to a Shinigami’s. It’s obvious.”

Even if Ichigo felt like he was about to drown in tea, he shook his head viciously. “B-But! B-Bankai?!”

“That doesn’t mean I want to…” Ulquiorra started but was silenced by Kisuke’s knowing grin. He grunted, not finishing his sentence. “Utter drivel.”

The former captain chuckled. Ulquiorra might be reluctant to reach into his Shinigami nature but Kisuke had no doubts that he would. Ulquiorra was a very, very curious creature.

“It’s going to be ages until he achieves Bankai,” Ichigo said, wiping at his nose with his sleeve. He had mostly recovered, but his nose still hurt. He felt relieved that the inevitability of facing Mayuri, and possibly the rest of the Shinigami, had been postponed.

Kisuke was of different opinion, but didn’t voice his thoughts. Years ago, when he had decided to train Ichigo, the red-head had been a confused teenager with no experience. He didn’t understand who he was, the power he had, or how to use it. Ulquiorra, on the other hand, was a completely different matter. He was what he was and he had no problem with himself whether he was an Arrancar or Hollow or Shinigami or something else entirely. He may not like it, but he accepted it and had centuries of experience with reiatsu on his shoulders.

\- - - 

“First, you’ll need to learn its name,” Ichigo told Ulquiorra while they were on their way to the school to pick up his sisters. They were nearly there and, since they had arrived at the area a little too early, were now strolling over the streets at a leisure pace.

“A name?” Ulquiorra gave the green Zanpakuto hanging at his side a dubious look. He had noticed that the Shinigami indeed had names for their Zanpakutos, but it seemed quite absurd. It made sense to give names for various attacks, but the point of naming a Zanpakuto escaped him. “Why do I need to give it a name?” he grunted, frowning. “It’s a katana, it’s not like anyone is going to talk to it.”

Ichigo chuckled at the discontentment on the older man’s face. “It’s not like that. Yours has already got a name, you just don’t know it yet. It also has a personality and you might have to make some kind of a deal with it to be able to use Bankai. That’s just how it is. Knowing their names is the only way to achieve Shikai and then Bankai.”

“Yours is Zangetsu, right?”

Ichigo nodded. “Yeah.”

It was a flashy name and Ulquiorra frowned again. His Zanpakuto had better come up with something more straightforward and meaningful. It was a killing tool, not a beauty contestant.

“You should definitely try achieving Bankai,” Ichigo encouraged. He was very curious. If this was really possible now, he wanted to see it.

“Tomorrow morning?” Ulquiorra offered.

“Ermm… I have lectures till five,” Ichigo said uncertainly, taken aback by such sudden development. “But you can go to the training grounds earlier on your own. I’m sure Kisuke will help you out.”

“I’d rather just wait until you return.”

Ichigo shrugged and winced painfully. The red-head understood the reservations that Ulquiorra had towards Kisuke, but he doubted he would make a better teacher than the former captain. The red-head didn’t have much experience and wasn’t certain if discovering a Zanpakuto’s name worked the same for everyone. Kisuke had taught him the basics, but there was probably no universal method. From the corner of his eye, Ichigo noticed Ulquiorra staring at his arm.

“It’s fine, stop staring at it or it’ll get infected.”

Ulquiorra humpfed and averted his eyes. That was probably the closest Ichigo was going to get to an apology. Not that it had been Ulquiorra’s fault. 

They approached the school and saw Yuzu and Karin waiting at the main entrance. The girls noticed them and started walking towards the gate.

“What happened to your arm?” Yuzu asked at the sight of the bandages on Ichigo.

“I broke him,” Ulquiorra stated.

“Don’t talk about me like I’m a toy,” Ichigo protested. He turned to his sisters. “We’ve just been sparring.”

“I bet you’re his favorite toy,” Karin mumbled, ducking her head as she passed the gate. Children were still leaving the school and she didn’t want them to think she was talking to herself. She grinned at Ichigo, who gave her a reproachful look.

They were nearly at the bus stop when Ichigo stopped walking. There was something going on with his body, but he couldn’t understand what it was. His arm was tingling as if it had gone numb, and he tried to move it. He rolled his shoulder and waved his arm about. It didn’t hurt anymore. The skin on his palm wasn’t painful either.

“What are you doing?”

Ichigo didn’t know. He gave his companions a confused look then asked Karin to help unwrap the bandages. The wound had disappeared.

“Orihime must have healed your body,” Karin concluded, holding out the bandages to Ichigo. She looked at her watch. “Yeah, she must already be at home with Kon.”

When they were nearly home, Ichigo started wondering whether a serious car accident had happened or if there was a mass cold in town. He could sense a lot of people in the house; it had been a long time ago since his father had so many patients.

When they approached the house, though, Ichigo could tell that, unless his dad had decided to arrange a group therapy session in their living room with Kon as a counselor, those were not patients.

Inside the house, Ichigo’s sisters were met with loud welcomes. Ichigo stared at Kon, who was surrounded by his groupmates from university. Timothy, Akio, Hisako, and Fumiko were all chatting merrily. Orihime was also there, which was for the best since her ample accessories kept the guys’ attention away from how silly and unusual Ichigo was acting.

Nori was sitting under the sofa, stressed out by all the noisy visitors. It was obvious that no amount of bribery or sweet talking had worked to lure her out. When Karin and Yuzu entered the living room, the cat scurried from under the sofa towards her bowl. For a moment, Nori became the main attraction.

Ichigo motioned for Kon to come out of the kitchen. He wanted his body back and the faster, the better. Kon was also wearing bandages on his arm, but Ichigo knew those were only for show.

“What’s with all the people?” the red-head asked while they were climbing to the second floor.

“Ehh…” Kon hummed guiltily. “As soon as you had left, Timothy phoned and asked me if they could come and see Nori. And then Orihime stopped by.”

“You should have told him I was busy or something.”

“I did,” Kon said. Then he leaned to Ichigo conspiratorially. “Then he told me he would burn me a DVD of his favorite porn!” he whispered. “I just couldn’t refuse!”

“Ugh,” Ichigo groaned, shuddering at Kon’s overflowing enthusiasm. “What the hell do you think of doing to my body?! That’s disgusting!”

There was a sudden bout of laughter and Ichigo’s head snapped to stare menacingly at Ulquiorra, who was climbing the stairs behind them. Ulquiorra turned away with a snigger. Ichigo felt even more annoyed with Kon since he knew very well what Ulquiorra was thinking. He really had to stop lending Kon his body or, at least, had to create a set of unbreakable rules.

They filed into Ichigo’s room and Ichigo switched with Kon, who returned into the plush bear. Ichigo patted his arm through the bandages, testing. As suspected, the bandages were only decoration. His forehead was also free of the bluish bump. Orihime was getting stronger – just a while ago she had not been able to heal the body and soul simultaneously. Ichigo didn’t think that there was anyone else who was powerful enough to do that.

At the sight of Ichigo rubbing his arm absentmindedly, Kon’s buttony eyes sparkled with mirth.

“You should’ve seen how everyone freaked out when blood spurted up!”

Ichigo’s mouth opened in horror. “Everyone saw that?”

“Oh, yes,” Kon confirmed, spreading his plush paws apart enthusiastically. 

“And? What did you do?” Ichigo asked, fretting. “What happened?” An arm starting to bleed without any reason had to cause quite some panic.

“Well, nothing? Orihime quickly took care of it in the bathroom and I said I’d broken a vase and cut myself a few minutes before they arrived and that the wound reopened.”

“A vase?” Ichigo snorted. “How can you cut your upper arm on that? They’ll think I’m a klutz!”

Kon waved off his worries. “It’s fine, we had a good laugh.”

“What’s so funny about a bleeding arm? I must have looked like a total idiot! You’ve completely ruined my image!”

Ichigo felt a hard stare and turned to meet Ulquiorra’s eyes. It was obvious that the man hadn’t been aware of his precious image.

“What are you supposed to be?” Ulquiorra asked as if on cue.

“Cool! I’m supposed to be cool!” Ichigo said, grabbing a comb from the bedside cabinet. “And he’s making me look like a simpleton.” Squatting down, he took a look at himself in the mirror hanging over the bedside cabinet. It hadn’t been touched since the beginning of high school and now hung too low. Ichigo just couldn’t get around to driving a new screw into a wall to raise it higher; he wasn’t good at these kinds of things.

Ulquiorra decided not to comment on this, in his opinion, silly and needlessly complicated issue. He watched Ichigo comb his red hair.

“So what have you been talking about so far?” Ichigo asked the bear.

“Cats,” Kon supplied helpfully. “Ah, yes. We’ve also decided to go to karaoke tomorrow after lectures.”

Ichigo groaned. “Again?” He put the comb back and turned around.

“I thought you liked karaoke?” Kon asked.

“I do, but we,” Ichigo motioned to himself and Ulquiorra, “agreed to go to Kisuke’s training grounds.”

Kon pumped his paw into the air victoriously. “You can go there, and I’ll go to karaoke. Don’t worry, I’ll make sure your body has a good time.”

Ichigo shook his head. Without a word, he left the two in his room and went downstairs. He had to think about how to balance tomorrow’s activities. He entered the kitchen and, smiling brightly, joined his friends.

Meanwhile, the atmosphere in Ichigo’s room had cooled off considerably and silence heavy like lead engulfed it. Kon and Ulquiorra stared at each other for some time then, whistling nervously, Kon retreated to the opposite end of the room.

“So how did it go at Urahara’s?” Kon asked. His sociable personality reacted very sensitively to any kind of silence. He felt threatened by it.

“It was alright,” Ulquiorra said. He approached the bedside cabinet and, curious, picked up the comb. He didn’t understand the “cool image” business, but it was obvious Ichigo was trying to show off to someone.

“Is there someone Ichigo is trying to impress?” Ulquiorra asked. He drew the comb through his hair. The teeth rained to the floor. “It broke,” he concluded. He pulled what was left of the comb out of his hair and put it back onto the bedside cabinet. What a useless thing.

It was suspiciously quiet and Ulquiorra turned to the plush bear. Kon’s snout had a look of epiphany that turned to horror. Slowly, a smirk spread over Ulquiorra’s face. It seemed like the Modified Soul had finally figured it out.

\- - - 

Ichigo woke up with a gasp. Burning green dots appeared before him and he shrank back to the end of his bed and put his arms up in front of him in defense. He stared at the green dots until he realized what they were. Still disoriented, Ichigo lowered his arms, let out the breath he had been holding, and continued breathing in quick, short gasps.

“What’s wrong with you?” Ulquiorra asked.

Ichigo rubbed his forehead. It was sticky with sweat. “I think I had a nightmare,” he answered, surprised; nightmares were rare, especially such realistic ones.

There was a knock at the door and someone’s head popped in. Light flooded the room. Karin’s hand on the switch, she looked at her brother, noting Ulquiorra next to the bed.

“Are you alright?”

Ichigo realized that he must have shouted in his sleep or just before waking up. He blinked against the light and nodded. “Yeah, I’m fine. It was only a nightmare.” Karin gave him a mistrustful look and Ichigo forced a smile. “Just a nightmare,” he reassured her.

Karin closed the door. Ichigo wanted to call her back to turn off the light, but maybe it was alright that she hadn’t. With a sigh, he lowered his head onto his knees. It was nice to feel the cool and soft fabric of the duvet.

“So what did you dream about?”

Ichigo hummed quietly. The memory of the dream had mostly faded already and was dissipating further. He could, however, remember Byakuya hot on his heels, about to cut him down. He could also remember the claustrophobic cells in Mayuri’s laboratory. He had been locked in one, Mayuri about to do something to him. And he had seen clones looking just like Ulquiorra. All in all, he remembered too much for his comfort.

“Have you seen more clones besides you?” Ichigo asked. He felt stupid for not having asked earlier.

Ulquiorra nodded. He had mostly been unconscious but, from time to time, he would see a body or two similar to his. Sometimes, those were just formless masses, but he could tell instinctively that they were connected.

“Would they help us out if we needed them?”

Ulquiorra shrugged. “I don’t know. It is possible that they will fight us. However, it is more likely they will just be unconscious or sleeping.”

Ichigo was silent for a moment, thinking. Clones as strong as Ulquiorra would be impossible to fight if they were at their full strength; he wasn’t even able to win against one specimen. “What will you do with them if they’re unconscious?” Ichigo asked him.

“That depends on their shape and condition.”

Ichigo ruffled his hair nervously. He could tell what Ulquiorra meant. If they were non-threatening, Ulquiorra would not bother with them. If he sensed hostility, he would kill. Then there was the possibility of encountering half-formed hybrids, half-evolved blobs. Ichigo couldn’t fathom what they would do with those.

\- - - 

Ichigo was late. He opened the door to the lecture hall quietly and snuck inside. Timothy waved and motioned Ichigo to sit next to him, but was ignored. Hunching his shoulders, the red-head made his way to the very end of the hall and sat down. He took his notebook and pen out and started following the lecture. After about ten minutes, he started to nod off. 

Yawning, Ichigo rubbed his eyes. He tried to concentrate again, but several minutes later, he put his head onto his notebook and closed his eyes, wondering why he had even bothered coming.

Ichigo woke up to someone patting him on the shoulder. His eyes flew open and he straightened up in his chair, making Timothy start.

“Huh, didn’t sleep well last night?”

Ichigo yawned loudly. He looked around – the lecture was already over, everyone chattering, getting ready for the next one; it was going to take place in the same room. Ichigo nodded. After that nightmare, he and Ulquiorra had talked for a while. Later, when he had tried to sleep again, he had been kept awake by his restless mind until four.

“Any news about Kana?”

Ichigo shrugged and shook his head. Kana hadn’t returned yet. When Kon had rushed out of the karaoke booth with Kana in his arms, his groupmates had believed that he had taken her to the hospital. Naturally, he had encouraged this presumption and, in case they decided to visit her, also spewed some nonsense about Kana being taken away from the hospital by her relatives. 

Ichigo didn’t know whether she had revealed more information. If she had, however, he probably would have been told; Rukia had been paying him regular visits for the last two weeks and hadn’t mentioned anything. Kana was going to return from Soul Society, but she would never be able to wield her Fullbringer powers again. Ichigo doubted he would see her again, since her being a student at the university had only been pretense.

“…evening…so excited! …tomorrow. Right?”

Sleepily, Ichigo blinked at Timothy who was giving him a questioning look. “What?”

Timothy glared at him. “I said I’m excited about Freeway Clouds’ live concert tomorrow.”

“Huh? What do they play?”

Timothy turned to Akio, who had just approached them. “I think Ichigo’s lost his mind,” he complained.

“What? Why?” Akio asked, leaning against the red-head’s desk.

Ichigo watched them converse and yawned again. So sleepy. He couldn’t even care about the precious image he had carefully built up. Oh well, most of it had already been ruined.

“Okay,” Akio patted Ichigo on his head comfortingly. “Make sure you get some rest now. We still got karaoke in the afternoon.”

“Oh, that,” Ichigo said, raising his head. “I can’t go. I’ve got an appointment.”

“Bullshit,” Timothy declared authoritatively. “You’re going to karaoke – I’m in dire need of support there.”

Ichigo groaned. “Why don’t you just start dating her?”

“I’m trying to!”

“Just ask her out.”

“I have! That’s why we’re going to karaoke!”

Ichigo’s head fell to the desk with a soft thump. “Fine.”

Akio patted Ichigo’s hair sympathetically again. “He’s trying, he really is.”

Ichigo felt rather than saw something slip inside his bag; he was always aware of his bag since it was where he usually kept Kon and his Shinigami Badge. 

“What’s that?” the red-head asked, his hand diving into the bag after the peculiar object. He blindly groped around the books and a few notepads. The object appeared to be tightly lodged in Kon’s plushy paws. After some quiet struggle, Ichigo managed to tear it out of the bear’s grip and lifted it out of the bag to take a look. It was a CD, but he had already recognized the shape before pulling it out.

“What’s this?” Ichigo repeated, turning the compact disc around.

“That’s yesterday’s deal,” Timothy told him.

“Huh?” Then Ichigo realized. “Oh, right. Thanks, I completely forgot.”

“Yeah, you’ve been a total scatterbrain lately. Maybe you need to get yourself checked out?” Timothy suggested.

“I’ll do that,” Ichigo agreed easily, slipping the compact disc back into his bag. Kon’s paws wrapped around his prized CD immediately. The red-head felt the urge to smack him around a few times, but, afraid that the bear would start making noise, squashed down the need.

\- - -

Coming to karaoke hadn’t been a good idea. Ichigo rubbed at his eyes, yawned, and took a sip of his milkshake. He was the third wheel. Timothy and Fumiko were so engaged in conversation that Timothy’s glasses were about to steam up. Akio and Hisako, on the other hand, were shyly watching each other over their glasses of juice and seemingly communicating with their thoughts and eyes alone. Ichigo felt the urge to facepalm. It was a mystery as to why Timothy and Akio had insisted that he come with them. Maybe they pitied him and were trying to be considerate? It turned out to be the opposite, though. He preferred to be anywhere but here.

“Psst! Psst!”

Ichigo turned to his bag next to him. One of Kon’s buttony eyes was looking at him pleadingly from the unzipped gap in the bag. Ichigo raised his eyebrows questioningly.

“Let’s go home,” Kon begged quietly.

Ichigo only had too clear an idea of why the Modified Soul wanted to go home and shook his head stubbornly; he’d rather spend more time sitting here like an idiot than let Kon watch that porn.

Bored out of his mind, the red-head mixed his milkshake with the straw haphazardly and took a sip. Even the milkshake tasted plain next to these lovebirds. It wasn’t their fault – they did try to include him in their conversations, but always ended up absorbed in each other. It was as much annoying as amusing.

Ichigo nearly choked on his drink when he suddenly saw Ulquiorra pass the wall near Akio. The man took in his surroundings, spotted Ichigo and pulled his phone out. Pointing at the screen, he gave Ichigo a discontent look.

“You are late.”

TBC


	17. Part 17

**Thank you for all the kudos ^_^**

 

**The Heart in My Hand**

by chayron (lttomb@yahoo.com)

Part 17

Ichigo chewed on a stretchy piece of something that tasted like squid but smelled like chocolate cake. It was Kisuke’s special. The red-head and Kisuke were sitting with their backs against one of the many boulders in Urahara Shop’s training grounds. It had been thirty minutes since they had entered. Twenty of those minutes had been spent staring at Ulquiorra’s unmoving form. The man stood further away with his back to them. Ulquiorra’s body was tense, an occasional shiver passing him.

“Did I just stand like that, too?” Ichigo wondered, trying to remember how it had gone for him. Most of what had happened while he had been trying to discover his Shinigami powers had transpired inside him. It had been his inner conflict and final resolution.

Kisuke nodded. It was always the same: some people sat, others stood, but the battle was within them. Some won it easily, others lost. And some never needed to win. But Ulquiorra would have to win. The former captain was almost certain of that; it was vital that Ulquiorra was in control of his Zanpakuto spirit.

Both Ichigo and Kisuke started when Ulquiorra shifted abruptly, his shoulders relaxing. His usual white attire was slowly losing its color, turning black instead. Ichigo’s mouth opened in awe. He should have expected this, keeping in mind what discovering one’s Zanpakuto meant, and yet he could not help feeling amazed.

Ulquiorra opened his eyes and the uncommonly dark color of his clothes made him grunt in annoyance. He was wearing a common Shinigami robe, the same irritating robe he had kept shedding recently. Leaving the matter for later, he pulled his Zanpakuto out. This was supposedly his Shikai, but it didn’t seem any different.

“So what’s the name?” Ichigo asked. He and Kisuke stood up and approached Ulquiorra to take a closer look at the green Zanpakuto.

Testing, Ulquiorra swished his Zanpakuto around. “I didn’t ask.”

“Erm…” the red-head drawled uncertainly. “That’s weird.” He had never heard of someone achieving Shikai without knowing their Zanpakuto’s name. Ichigo turned to Kisuke. “You have to ask, right?”

Kisuke’s hand slid under his hat to give a good scratch to the back of his head. “Well, that’s usually how it goes.”

“It wasn’t very talkative,” Ulquiorra informed them. In fact, as soon as they had seen each other, the accursed Zanpakuto spirit had done its best to try and kill him. Only after he had beaten some sense into the spirit had it finally stopped protesting. Ulquiorra knew that he would have to find out the name and establish some sort of a bond with the spirit, since his Shikai was now only as good as a common katana. His energy levels had risen but he had no idea what kind of powers his Shikai possessed. Useless.

His thick eyebrows furrowed, Ulquiorra dropped from Shikai form and pushed his Zanpakuto back into its sheath. For now, it didn’t seem like it was possible to try and find any common ground with his Zanpakuto spirit. He had to give the spirit some time to cool off. 

Ulquiorra’s Shinigami attire switched to his usual Arrancar outfit as he walked towards the exit.

“That’s it?” Ichigo muttered in disbelief. “You dragged me out of the karaoke booth just for this?”

“I didn’t know that thing would be so aggressive,” Ulquiorra said over his shoulder. “I couldn’t even talk to it.”

“They’re not a thing, they’re a part of you,” Ichigo pointed out. “I bet your Zanpakuto hates you because you aren’t taking them seriously! Stop calling the spirit “it”. You saw them. What was their gender?”

“It’s male. Does it even matter?”

“Of course it does!” Ichigo turned to Kisuke, who was following them. “Tell him.”

Kisuke pushed his striped hat down over his eyes. “I think you’re doing just fine on your own.”

Snorting, Ichigo turned away from him. Disrespect was the exact reason Ulquiorra was not able to feel the connection with his Zanpakuto. He had obviously used brute force to make the spirit obey and achieve Shikai. There had to be some kind of coexistence.

ooOoOoOoo

“I can’t take you with me,” Ichigo was saying to Kon. The two were in the red-head’s room, Ichigo about to head to Kisuke’s. “It could be dangerous. Stay here and protect my body.”

“But I want to see what’s it like,” Kon protested.

“There’s nothing to see yet,” the red-head told him impatiently. “The only thing that happens is that his robe changes into a Shinigami’s. That’s all.”

“Then what’s the problem? I’m going with you.”

Groaning, Ichigo slapped his forehead. “No, you are not! What if something unexpected happens? My body can’t handle that much reiatsu, and you could get hurt, too!”

“Kisuke will find a way to protect me.”

“Kisuke uses his Bankai to stay safe!” Ichigo tried to reason. “I don’t get it! Why do you even want to go to the training grounds?” he asked Kon for what seemed the hundredth time.

“To protect your chastity, of course!” Kon spat irritably, his buttony eyes glaring at Ichigo.

The red-head froze. “Ah, that,” he finally said.

“You knew?” Kon asked, incredulous.

Ichigo shifted awkwardly. “Well, he hasn’t been very subtle.”

The plushy bear stared at him. “You can’t be serious… You and that… that… You aren’t even gay to begin with!” Kon suddenly realized that he had to give this spontaneous presumption some more thought. “Are you?”

Ichigo shook his head. “It’s not like that.” He threw his arms apart suddenly. “Who cares? He’s just…” He wanted to say ‘teasing’ but being pushed down with a hand down his underwear obviously exceeded that. “He’s just playing some kind of a game.”

Had Kon been able to, he would have rolled his eyes. “Well, duh! Of course he is. It’s called ‘Let’s Bone Ichigo’.”

The red-head glared at him. Vulgar or not, Kon was probably right and it annoyed Ichigo even more. “In any case,” he spat, “I haven’t got any chastity to begin with, so you don’t need to worry.”

Kon raised his right paw meaningfully. “You’re wrong here. And stop boasting!”

Ichigo slapped his forehead again and tried to leave the room. Kon bounced after him and all but wrapped around his leg. The red-head tried to shake him off but the bear hung on as if glued. Peeling Kon off appeared just as ineffective – Ichigo didn’t want to rip his paws or head off.

“Let go.”

“No! I’m going with you!”

Slowly and carefully arranging his legs, Ichigo descended the stairs and stood in the corridor, thinking. He turned to the bathroom.

“Where are you going?” Kon asked suspiciously.

“Oh, I think you know. Just imagine yourself smelling like piss.”

The bear gasped. “You wouldn’t dare!”

Despite the bold statement, Kon’s voice was permeated with apprehension. Ichigo tried to shake him off his leg again, but the Modified Soul hadn’t come to his senses yet.

“What are you doing?”

Both Ichigo and Kon turned to stare at Ulquiorra, who had just passed the wall near the kitchen. There was a very peculiar look on Ulquiorra’s face and they met each other’s eyes. It became obvious to them that to any other passerby it might seem like Kon was humping Ichigo’s leg.

“Gah!” Kon let go of Ichigo as if his leg had suddenly turned to lava. He gave the leg a disgusted look. He would have probably spat on it as well if he had any saliva.

Using the opportunity, Ichigo grabbed Kon by the neck and fished the pill out of his snout. He popped it into his mouth and, while the disoriented Modified Soul tried to make sense of the sudden changes in his body, flash-stepped towards the door. He shouted for Ulquiorra to run as well but the other man didn’t even budge – Kon knew where they were going anyway. Running meant that Kon would simply reach the training grounds later.

While Kon was sprinting past him, Ulquiorra reached out and grabbed the Modified Soul by the arm. The action was so sudden and fast that Kon nearly fell over, his lower body still moving forward while the rest of him was suspended in an unyielding grip.

“Don’t interfere.”

Kon snorted derisively. “Why shouldn’t I?!”

Ulquiorra’s fingers squeezed his arm tightly. “You have got your big-footed woman. What do you want with Ichigo?”

The Modified Soul sputtered in indignation. “What are you implying? Looking after Ichigo is a part of my job!”

“Is that so? It seems to me that you are overzealous with your job.”

“The word is ‘ _enthusiastic_ ’, not ‘ _overzealous_ ’!”

“Whatever. Stay away.”

Kon glared at Ulquiorra. How could he have even presumed that this vile creature was after Orihime? It appeared that when it concerned his real interests, Ulquiorra was very assertive.

“I won’t stay away!” Kon spat. “What do you even want with him? You’ll be returning to Hueco Mundo in a bit. Leave him alone!”

Ulquiorra’s thick eyebrows rose. “You seem to have problems with processing information,” he concluded. “You do value your big-footed woman, don’t you?”

“Huh? What? What’re you gonna do? Is that a threat?”

Ulquiorra rolled his eyes. “Of course it is a threat.” He was tempted to emphasize his words by tightening his grip even more, but Kon’s arm was already close to breaking point. No matter the current resident inside, the body belonged to Ichigo. Breaking his arm would result in a series of unpleasant consequences.

Kon’s face scintillated with hatred. Apparently, Ulquiorra knew very well that Orihime was interested in him. While he seemed not to care, he could still use her attraction to get some use out of her. Kon had no doubts about that. Killing or harming her way would incur Ichigo’s wrath and Ulquiorra, obviously, would not want that. Would he try seducing her? Kon nearly gagged at the thought.

“Well?”

“I got it,” Kon grunted, giving in. “But just for today!”

Without a word, Ulquiorra’s grip went lax and he shoved Kon aside. A few seconds later, he was gone, catching up to Ichigo.

\- - - 

From afar, Ulquiorra watched his Shinigami counterpart. Today his Zanpakuto didn’t seem to be as aggressive as yesterday. Just as Ulquiorra had told Ichigo, it was male. His most distinctive features were the two white horns at the sides of his head. They weren’t big, just of average size, but Ulquiorra had experienced their sharpness yesterday when he had accidentally cut himself on one of them. The Zanpakuto spirit was tall, much taller than Ulquiorra. He was slim, a strange dark blue outfit hanging loosely on his frame. His big blue eyes had struck Ulquiorra as familiar but he had neither been able to remember what or who they reminded him of yesterday nor was he able to today.

Ichigo had advised him to be respectful to the Zanpakuto spirit. Ulquiorra stared at him even harder. Easy for Ichigo to say.

“Since when did you care what some Human says?”

Ulquiorra blinked at the spirit. Right, Ichigo had told him they were one entity, so the Zanpakuto must know his thoughts. This was very annoying. It was, however, now clear why the Zanpakuto had attacked him on sight yesterday. Did they really need to talk at all, though, if they shared their thoughts? On the other hand, did they? He couldn’t read his Zanpakuto’s thoughts.

“You can’t because you don’t care,” the Zanpakuto declared loudly, annoyance clear on his face and in his voice.

“Well, yes, not particularly,” Ulquiorra agreed. “And to answer your previous question, Ichigo is not ‘some’ Human. Besides, if you know my thoughts, you don’t need to ask.”

The spirit gave him a disdainful look. “It’s purely sport. And I know the question gets on your nerv-”

“So what is your name?”

The Zanpakuto rolled his eyes in disbelief.

“Too early, huh? So what do you usually do here?”

“You don’t even expect me to answer…”

Ulquiorra shrugged. “You just might.” He looked around the vast space. Yesterday he had no time to take it all in due to the sudden attack. The place reminded him of Hueco Mundo; it felt homelike. There was a stark difference between the two, though. The familiar, white sand desert stretched as far as the eye could see, but there were many more trees than Ulquiorra was used to. They also seemed to be alive, with light blue leaves, not some quartz structures.

Curious, Ulquiorra approached one to inspect it. When he touched the bark, it resonated, sending a spark of warmth up his spine. It was indeed alive, just like the one he had spent most of his Hollow days in.

Ulquiorra had also become aware of the soft sound of water and started walking in the direction of the noise. The Zanpakuto spirit followed him, keeping his distance.

“So how do you spend your days here?” Ulquiorra asked again while they climbed over a high dune. The white grains of sand made a pleasant, soft sound as they cascaded under their feet and down the slope.

The spirit pursed his lips. “Trying to… tame me is futile.”

“Is it? Is this place as big as it seems?”

“It’s endless.”

Ulquiorra raised his head to look at the huge moon hanging above them. It shone much more brightly than in Hueco Mundo – here it was as bright as a sun, making this world much lighter. Maybe it was a sun. The air wasn’t hot, though. Barely warm. The sand under their feet was cool as well.

“Does anything interesting happen here? Anyone else live here?”

They had finally reached the top of the dune and Ulquiorra was amazed to see a river far in the distance. Blue-leaved trees were everywhere. There were even tufts of bluish grass along the banks of the river.

“Just me and the Hollow.”

Ulquiorra, who had not expected an answer, turned to him. “The counterpart? Do you fight?”

“Why would we?”

Ulquiorra shrugged. Indeed, why would they? They were all one and the same being. Not for the first time, he wondered why Ichigo found it so difficult to sort himself out. The red-head became panicky every time his Hollow nature manifested itself. That was silly – the more he fretted, the more the Hollow wanted to take over. Fear was a weakness and Hollows exploited weakness.

“I don’t like you,” the Zanpakuto spirit declared, reflecting on Ulquiorra’s thoughts. They made him want to attack Ulquiorra again.

Ulquiorra rolled his eyes at the obvious and continued walking down to the valley. “Why?”

“I liked the other one better.”

“The other one?”

“The other you.”

“Oh.” Surprised, Ulquiorra turned to the spirit. “How old are you?”

The spirit frowned. “That’s not what you want to ask. I was born within the other when he gained Shinigami powers. Then he was killed. Then you appeared and I had to return.”

Ulquiorra nodded and chuckled. “You say you liked him better, but he wasn’t even aware of your existence.” Yet, it was the first time he had heard that Zanpakuto spirits remained bound to the same soul for eternity. “And what did you do while I wasn’t here?”

“I didn’t exist.”

Ulquiorra thought for a moment. “So you were dead as well.”

“I can’t be dead – I’m not alive.”

“Well, neither am I, nor any other Arrancar, nor Shinigami for that matter but…”

“It works differently with spirits. We are… inactive, but in a state of constant preparedness.”

“I see. So you do exist.”

“No, we don’t. The mold does. We are always ready to be reborn.”

“This doesn’t make much sense. You can’t both exist and not exist at the same time.”

“I don’t exist but the mold does.”

“Whatever.”

Just like in Hueco Mundo, distances were deceptive. What had seemed to be a half an hour’s walk turned out to be a real journey. It was worth it, though. The flowing water of the river was soothing and, after walking along its bank, Ulquiorra sat down on one of the lonely patches of blue grass.

\- - - 

Ichigo was drawing a smiley face on the ground, bored. The stick he had picked up was very short and he was squatting down.

“How long do you think it will take him to achieve Bankai?” he mused, staring at Ulquiorra, who remained unmoving farther into the training grounds.

Kisuke, who had been snoozing, lifted his hat to inspect Ichigo’s drawing. The red-head was now adding curly hair to the grinning face. “With that attitude?” he muttered. “Hmph. A couple of months at least.”

“Bankai.”

They turned to see Ulquiorra standing with his Zanpakuto pointing forward. 

“But due to my superb training, that time has been reduced,” Kisuke added proudly.

“You didn’t even train him.”

“I lent the training grounds,” the former captain pointed out to Ichigo, who rolled his eyes.

They stared at Ulquiorra’s new form curiously. The green Zanpakuto hadn’t changed much in appearance but it had become much longer, its reach wider. Ulquiorra was wearing the same Shinigami robe but there was now a white sash tied over his waist.

Ulquiorra was inspecting his Zanpakuto, weighing it in his hand, checking the grip on the hilt.

“So what’s his name?” Ichigo asked.

“Minazarim,” Ulquiorra answered without looking at the red-head.

Ichigo raised his eyebrows at the exclusive name; so much for Ulquiorra preferring simplicity. It was, however, not for Ulquiorra to decide. “And what’s Minazarim’s specialty?” he asked.

Ulquiorra lowered his Zanpakuto. “Mmn… I can do this…” He lifted his Zanpakuto upwards and it suddenly disappeared. Behind him, hundreds of green spears appeared.

“Ehh…” Ichigo drawled, impressed, staring. “Can you control every one of them?”

Ulquiorra thought for a moment, checking his senses. “I will be able to, but not quite yet.”

“Then it’s better we try that later,” Kisuke suggested carefully. “With fewer spears.” The reiatsu Ulquiorra was emitting now was nowhere close to his second form, but the spears looked formidable enough. They were obviously also trickier to fend off than Ulquiorra’s usual spears. 

“And yet your reiatsu doesn’t exactly feel like a Shinigami’s,” Ichigo informed Ulquiorra.

Ulquiorra nodded. In fact, his current reiatsu more or less matched that of Ichigo’s when the red-head was in Bankai with his Hollow mask.

“What does your Shikai actually look like?” Kisuke asked.

Ulquiorra dispersed the spears and dropped from Bankai. His Shikai form appeared to be of similar nature, where he was able to summon ten spears. He grabbed one out of the air and threw it at a boulder behind Ichigo. The boulder disintegrated in the same manner as if it had been hit by a Cero.

“Awesome,” Kisuke summed up at once. “So you can go and train with these.”

\- - - 

Ulquiorra spent three hours trying to get used to his Shikai. Once, he nearly skewered himself with one of the spears. It was going to take much more time to perfect the technique and even more time to gain full control of his Bankai than he had anticipated. He wondered if it was even worth it. He was probably wasting his time.

Ulquiorra dismissed his Shikai, and, content, watched his white Arrancar clothes replace the Shinigami robe. He looked around, spotted a resilient boulder which had survived his training, and went to lean against it. Ichigo had told him he wanted to spar, but Ulquiorra was tired.

Kisuke turned to Ulquiorra to find him sitting against a boulder further away. He was watching Ichigo warm up, his eyes following the red-head’s steady moves. Kisuke walked over and sat down next to him. He had wanted to talk to Ulquiorra earlier, only that the topic he had wanted to touch upon was not something one could easily raise. In the end, the former captain decided to be as straightforward as he could.

“You like Ichigo,” he stated.

Ulquiorra turned to Kisuke, his emerald eyes questioning why he had bothered to state such an obvious fact. Flustered, Kisuke scratched the back of his head.

“You want him.”

The gaze didn’t change. Again, it seemed that Ulquiorra didn’t understand why he was mentioning such a well-established truth.

“Err… It’s not common in the Human World for two males to… well, to be intimate.”

“It seems so,” Ulquiorra agreed; he had figured it was something like that.

Kisuke stared at him quietly for a few seconds. “You’ve already tried to…” he trailed off, turning to Ichigo as well. Isshin was going to flip out. Kisuke huffed and continued to stare at Ichigo wordlessly. It wasn’t his business who Ichigo slept with, but Ulquiorra was… a bit too much. He had seen it coming, though. Normally, it was Ichigo who affected others and drew them in. This time, it had worked both ways. The red-head had fallen into Ulquiorra’s pace without much thought.

“You do realize that you’ve got practically no chance of winning against Kurosuchi?”

Ulquiorra nodded. “Yes, I saw the intelligence Aizen had gathered on him.”

“No matter how much power you have,” Kisuke continued, “his fighting technique is unique. Neither you nor Ichigo stand a chance.”

Ulquiorra glowered at the oblivious red-head further away. “It is not in my intentions to face him directly.”

“No, Ichigo didn’t tell me anything about your plans,” Kisuke said, noticing the glare. “It is obvious that he will get involved, though. He always gets involved. However, I’m not sure he realizes what he’s sticking his nose into.”

Kisuke waited for Ulquiorra to say something but the other man just shrugged. “It is his decision to make.”

“He might die.”

Ulquiorra shrugged again. “It’s up to him,” he repeated. He didn’t really understand what the former captain was asking him to do. Telling Ichigo not to go would not work. Trying to prevent him from going forcefully might work, but Ulquiorra didn’t want to do that. If Ichigo had made his decision, why should he try to stop him? It was his right to go. Besides, Ichigo would be useful if they really had to face Mayuri.

\- - -

While returning home, Ichigo and Ulquiorra found Karin and Kon returning from football practice and joined them. 

“How did it go?” Kon asked with a soft grunt, still angry with both Ulquiorra and Ichigo.

“It was a success!” Ichigo announced victoriously. After Ulquiorra was done with his Shikai training, they had sparred. Fighting Ulquiorra in his second form was beneficial: Ichigo could feel himself getting stronger, more nimble. He had also gotten used to Ulquiorra’s fighting style and was more or less able to predict his moves; today there were no cuts on the red-head’s body.

When they were nearly there, Ichigo could feel Rukia in the kitchen, probably talking to Isshin. Orihime was also there, flitting from one room to another; Ichigo guessed she was playing with the kitten. Yuzu was in her room, on the second floor. Curious, Ichigo scanned Rukia’s reiatsu in the kitchen again. Maybe she had some news.

Kon was carrying the plushy bear in his bag and, at the door, he and Ichigo exchanged bodies. They went into the house. At the sound of the door opening, Orihime and Yuzu went to greet them.

Ulquiorra sniffed the air, frowning. “What’s that smell? It’s like there’s something dead lying around.” He sniffed again and his eyes set on Ichigo’s feet. “Ah.” The red-head had just taken his shoes off. This was not the first time he had encountered this putrid stench.

“Uh,” Ichigo said, shuffling his feet awkwardly. “Seems like Kon kept Karin company during practice.”

“Yup!” Kon confirmed, full of excitement. “I jogged! I was first to make ten laps!”

“That’s your feet?” Orihime said, incredulous. “Ichigo…” She rushed to open the window at the end of the corridor before they could suffocate.

Ulquiorra gave the red-head’s feet one more inspecting look. “Amazing. You could use this as a secret weapon.” He thought that it would not impress Mayuri at all.

“It would probably attract vultures, though,” Kon pointed out.

Karin snickered. “That’s nothing. You should’ve been there when he took off his sneakers after a two-day hike that we had at school. We nearly died of shock.”

Ichigo huffed. “Stop it already. It’s not that I can help it. I’ll go take a shower. Everyone’s happy now, right?”

Karin gave him thumbs up. Ichigo rolled his eyes and went to the kitchen to greet the others. He had expected Rukia to give him some news, but after greeting him, she exchanged a few more words with Isshin, then excused herself and left. Ichigo went upstairs to get a change of clothes then occupied the bathroom.

Meanwhile, Ulquiorra slumped onto his futon, tired. Today had been exhausting. He closed his eyes, but his rest was interrupted by a knock at the door, and Yuzu came in with a tray. The smell of tea and coffee filled the air. There was also the familiar scent of the freshly baked buns that Orihime had brought from her part-time job.

Yuzu set the tray onto Ichigo’s desk and, in only a few seconds, just as Ulquiorra had figured, the rest of the red-head’s friends showed up. Ulquiorra would have liked them to stay in the kitchen with the oldest Kurosaki, but the last time he had suggested that, Isshin had said that youngsters preferred their own company. Ulquiorra wondered if Isshin realized that the two of them were about the same age. Or maybe the oldest Kurosaki had been sarcastic. One could never know.

When, about an hour later, everyone had finally left, Ulquiorra dug into his futon and closed his eyes blissfully. Ichigo rustled about, went to the bathroom, returned, searched for something in his bag, left the room again, then returned and dropped something.

“Would you go to sleep already?” Ulquiorra grunted. He turned his head to see the red-head picking up the book he had dropped.

“Soon,” Ichigo assured him. Ulquiorra watched him as he sat down on his bed. “I think there’s something strange going on with Rukia coming and leaving like this. Kisuke also seems…”

“They want your father to go back to Soul Society.”

Ichigo stared at him. “They what? Why?”

“As far as I understand, Ukitake’s health is failing and they are looking for the most agreeable replacement.”

“Huh.” Ichigo found it hard to believe, but this version was better than none. Ukitake’s health had always been declining. It was possible that it was really bad this time. “But why my dad? They can pick someone else. Besides, didn’t he retire already? There was probably some trouble when he left, too.”

“There wasn’t. They didn’t like him choosing a Quincy but he resigned and left for the Human World before it could escalate. And now that the hindrance is gone, it seems that they have decided that he’s the most suitable candidate to replace Ukitake.”

“That hindrance you’re talking about is my mother.”

Ulquiorra shrugged. “In any case, he won’t agree no matter how hard they push him – he has his daughters to raise. They would have more luck trying to convince you.” 

Ichigo gave him an incredulous look. “You’re kidding, right?”

“I am. But it is a possibility, is it not?”

TBC


	18. Part 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach – it belongs to its respective owners. This fan fiction is not a commercial project, and I am not making any money from writing it.  
> Warnings:  
> 1\. Yaoi (male x male). Ulquiorra x Ichigo and vice versa. Other pairings?  
> 2\. Ichigo – almost 19 years old; Ulquiorra – probably a few hundred as a Hollow and about a decade or so as an Arrancar?  
> 3\. Post anime (haven’t read the manga).  
> 4\. Alternate Universe.  
> 5\. I’m not a native speaker, thus expect various language oddities.  
> 6\. I’m not very familiar with all the details in the anime, and I am also new to Bleach fandom, so I will be straying away from the canon quite frequently. I do my research but Bleach is a vast universe that is not so easy to grasp. I must admit, though, that there are also things in the anime that don’t make sense to me and I take the liberty of recreating certain parts of this universe as I see fit.

**The Heart in My Hand**

by chayron (lttomb@yahoo.com), beta-read by Ash

Part 18

“We need to avoid the main gate,” Ulquiorra said, pointing at a crudely drawn map. He and Ichigo were in the red-head’s room, standing at the desk. It had taken Ichigo half a day to draw Seireitei’s map from memory. In the end, it had appeared that Ulquiorra was even more knowledgeable of its layout than the red-head. It was no wonder considering that this was the second time Ulquiorra was considering its invasion; Aizen had ordered every Arrancar to familiarize themselves with Seireitei’s plan.

“The main gate is no problem,” Ichigo said, shaking his head. “As long as it’s dark and you suppress your reiatsu, I can get you past – they’ll open it for me. And if it’s already open, we can just flash-step past it. The guard won’t be able to detect you. That’s how I got you out of Seireitei unnoticed in the first place.”

Ulquiorra stared at him for a few seconds. “Now I see why Aizen thought it would be easy to gain entrance. Why do they even have those incompetent guards at the gate?”

“So that we could get inside,” Ichigo replied, not wishing to start a discussion about how Soul Society had never been ready to face enemies of such caliber as Arrancars. He drew his finger over the line that was supposed to be a wall encircling the Twelfth Division premises. “Now, once we’re inside, we need to get past this wall. The gate will be guarded, so…”

“We kill the guards and go inside.”

“Which part of ‘no one has to die’ don’t you understand? Besides, they’ll shout for help.”

“Oh, right. Then we kill them quietly.”

“No, you can’t ki-” Ichigo trailed off at the amused look on Ulquiorra’s face. The other man was teasing him. “Concentrate.”

“I am fully concentrated,” Ulquiorra assured him.

“You can’t kill even if you’re attacked,” Ichigo insisted.

“Well, that depends on-”

“No!”

“Well, I suppose I can just cut off their arms and legs.”

“No, you can’t!”

Ulquiorra glared at him. “Then what in the world am I supposed to do?”

“And no Cero.”

“I regret ever telling you about this,” Ulquiorra informed the red-head angrily. “I don’t want this to be a suicidal mission. If you want to die, you can go and die alone.”

“If we do this right, no one has to die.”

“How do you imagine we can pull this through without any victims?”

“Well, we just…”

“Ichigo, dinner’s ready!”

The mood brightened at the prospect of food. Ichigo folded the map, stored it in the drawer and, leaving the discussion for later, the two of them went downstairs. 

In the kitchen, Orihime was helping set the plates. Kon’s plushy feet were rearranging themselves hurriedly as he followed Orihime to and fro. He was gushing about something to her excitedly. When Orihime nearly tripped over him, she lifted him and seated onto a chair at the table. At the sight of Ulquiorra, she went to the fridge to get a plate of raw Hollow meat. She set it onto the cupboard near the stove and went to sit at the table with the others.

By the time Ulquiorra finished frying the meat, everyone else was almost done with dinner. Yet, sipping their teas and coffees, they waited for him to join them at the table. Isshin, though, excused himself and went to close up the clinic.

Orihime watched Ulquiorra eat. It was always either meat or buns. She didn’t think she had ever seen him eat anything else. An occasional cup of tea, maybe. Did he even know what other food tasted like?

“Why don’t we go get some ice-cream, Ulquiorra?” she suggested. “There’s a stall nearby.”

Ulquiorra’s jaws stopped working for a moment while he stared at her, then he nodded. “We can.”

The table had turned quiet at Orihime’s question, but now the surprised silence had transformed into astonishment. Orihime, though, looked content – no matter what, this counted as a date. Ichigo wondered what exactly Ulquiorra was doing. Kon had already complained to the read-head about Ulquiorra’s audacity and his threats. Ichigo hadn’t paid them much attention since he was perfectly familiar with Kon’s tendency of getting on anyone’s nerves. Yet, it seemed that Ulquiorra might have been serious about his threat. Or maybe he wanted to have some fun while making him jealous. Both of them, him and Kon.

“What is ‘ice-cream’?” Ulquiorra asked the red-head softly as Orihime left the table to put her empty plates in the sink.

Or that.

Ichigo felt like facepalming. “It’s basically frozen milk and sugar.”

“So it’s Human food,” Ulquiorra summed. He grimaced. “I can’t eat that.”

Ichigo shrugged. “What did you think it was?”

Now it was Ulquiorra’s turn to shrug. “A bag of sand? A sack of asphalt? Something heavy she couldn’t get alone from a store?”

“You have a date now,” Ichigo informed him quietly. “Eating ice-cream together.”

“A date?” Ulquiorra repeated uncertainly. He was familiar with the particular meaning of the word and it made him grin at Kon. “Take that. And I haven’t even been trying.”

Ichigo was just in time to grab Kon by his plushy feet in midair. “You… Be quiet!” Ichigo hissed at Ulquiorra while struggling to stop Kon from trying to get his paws on the other man.

“Wow,” Karin said, watching the scene over the top of her mug. “That’s quite some love triangle! You can’t even find this much drama on TV nowadays.”

“It’s a trapezoid,” Yuzu corrected her.

“Why a trapezoid?” Karin asked.

“Well, there are four of them and with different relations to each other, so the sides are of different length.”

“You’ve been doing too much math,” Ichigo told her. “Go and rest.”

“A trapezoid,” Ulquiorra repeated. “She does have a point there.”

“Don’t you start,” Ichigo grunted irritably.

\- - -

Ichigo hid behind a lamp post. He took a careful peek from behind it at a small café further away from him. Ulquiorra and Orihime had just disappeared into it. It was evening, almost dark already.

“What are they doing?” Kon whispered worriedly. He had scaled Ichigo and was now on his head. Unlike he had believed, though, the height had not helped at all; Kon was having trouble keeping his balance as his plushy feet kept slipping off the smooth hair.

“They just went in,” Ichigo grunted, trying to see through the reflections in the windows. “They’re looking for a place to sit.” He squinted at the specular windows. Just before Ulquiorra had left with Orihime on this sporadic date, the bastard had had the nerve to goof around in front of the mirror theatrically and ask whether he looked good. Ulquiorra was enjoying this too much. 

Damn him.

Trying to see inside, Ichigo squinted more. And the bastard did look good, too. He probably knew that as well. Ichigo found Ulquiorra’s looks unusual, rather exotic. Without the horn, he appeared more Human-like. The impression was deceptive, but Ichigo found Ulquiorra’s current appearance more appealing.

“What are they doing now?”

Ichigo rolled his eyes. “Well, what can they do at a café? Eat.”

“Is he touching her?”

“I don’t think he’d touch her even if she begged him to,” Ichigo muttered. From the way Ulquiorra reacted around Orihime, Ichigo was under the impression that Ulquiorra was barely aware of her existence. There was some strange lethargic apathy he could sense from Ulquiorra.

“You’re too naïve!” the bear accused. “Too careless!”

“Gah!” Ichigo grunted as Kon nearly fell off and started pulling at his hair, trying to clamber back on top of his head. “Get off me!” He hushed as the door opened and Ulquiorra appeared with Orihime. “Shh!”

Kon finally managed to firmly attach himself to Ichigo’s head and now lay still. His buttony eye snuck a peek from behind the lamp post. Orihime and Ulquiorra were seating themselves outside the café at one of the free tables. There were no other customers outside. It made sense – no one else was able to see Ulquiorra, it would have looked strange if Orihime talked to herself alone at a table inside a full hall.

Interested, Ichigo watched the scene in front of him. Orihime immediately delved into the menu while Ulquiorra appeared to be very interested in the tented umbrella above their heads. Orihime lowered the menu and pointed at something in it. Ulquiorra looked at it and shrugged. Obviously, Ulquiorra wasn’t well-versed in courtship. He just sat there at the table. He didn’t even have the money to treat Orihime. That was actually Ichigo’s fault and the red-head felt guilty. 

“I should have given him some money.”

“You’re a freaking idiot!” Kon informed Ichigo, hitting him on the head. “You’re a moron! Do you really want him to win her over? Moron!”

“Stop hitting me! It hurts!” the red-head hissed.

In a couple of minutes, a waitress appeared with two dishes of ice-cream. She lowered the two bowls in front of Orihime, asked her something, took the menu and left.

“Does he actually know what ice-cream is?” Kon wondered, when Ulquiorra kept staring at the bowl of pink and yellow ice-cream in front of him. Ulquiorra took a spoon then lifted his head. He watched Orihime eating hers, the pink tongue and pearly-white teeth darting out to scoop the sweet-smelling mass off the spoon. 

Obviously, Ulquiorra was in a dilemma. Then he turned and shifted and, somehow, his ice-cream hit the ground. Ichigo was impressed with the masterful acting – one would never tell that it had been done intentionally. Yet, he had to laugh at the look of sheer annoyance on Ulquiorra’s face when Orihime sprung up and ran back into the shop to buy him a new one. 

Ulquiorra stared at the ice-cream on the floor, picked it up, and tossed into the trashcan, causing a few passersby to freak out and stare at the can. Then he turned around and started heading right in Ichigo’s direction. Shushing Kon, Ichigo hid behind the post as best as he could, but Ulquiorra materialized right in front of him. Without explanation, he grabbed Ichigo by the shoulder and, heeding no protests, dragged him towards the table. To avoid any open mouths or stares, Ichigo stopped squirming and tried to walk as naturally as he could while carrying a plush bear under his arm.

Orihime left the shop with a new bowl of ice-cream. She was surprised to see Ichigo and Kon at the table.

“Um, what a pleasant coincidence!” Kon chirped. “We were out shopping for tomorrow’s breakfast! And then we saw Ulquiorra here!”

Neither Ichigo nor Ulquiorra even attempted to support this load of drivel. Orihime nodded and held the bowl out for Ulquiorra, smiling. He took it and pushed it over to Ichigo. 

“He looks hungry,” he explained to Orihime’s questioning look. He looked proud of his plan and Ichigo snorted.

“You’re so thoughtful,” Orihime gushed. “Always thinking about others first.”

“Yes, and since I am so thoughtful, Ichigo will pay for it,” Ulquiorra told the red-head, pointing at the bowl. “For the one I dropped as well.”

Ichigo muttered something under his breath, but lacked the will to voice it clearly and, instead, scooped up some ice-cream to cool off his annoyance.

ooOoOoOoo

It was past two in the morning when Ichigo and Ulquiorra reached the premises of the Twelfth Division. Everything was going according to plan – the main gate to Seireitei had been open and they had snuck past it unnoticed. They had also been lucky enough to stay undetected since most residents in Seireitei were sleeping. The streets were empty and dark; very few lights glinted in the windows.

Crouching on a nearby roof, Ichigo and Ulquiorra watched two idling guards at the gate. The torches above their heads illuminated the door and a few meters in front of it. Unlike Ichigo had imagined, the distance from the roof and the wall appeared to be too far for a jump. Flash-stepping from the roof and over the wall might cause the guards to feel or notice their growing reiatsu. They couldn’t see what was happening behind the wall either, but it was clear there would be several guards on the other side of the gate. If they didn’t want to confront the watch, they had to abstain from the main entrance, look around, and try the walls on either the left or right side further down the street.

Ulquiorra had obviously reached the same conclusion as he had started moving to the right. They jumped over a few more roofs until the main gate was out of sight. The red-head quickly looked around and was relieved to see that the street was still empty and quiet. Ichigo’s heart was beating madly in his ears and he had to listen more carefully to ensure himself that it was really silent all around. He still couldn’t believe that they were really doing this. They had discussed it all, but there was still a very strong sense of incredulity, as if all of this wasn’t happening to him.

Ichigo and Ulquiorra landed in the middle of the street then jumped onto the wall. From up there, the dark shapes and outlines of the Twelfth Division barracks unclosed in front of them. It was half-light near the wall, while it was much darker further down between the barracks, only an occasional torch lighting the surroundings. 

Ichigo could feel a few Shinigami moving about, but he wasn’t able to tell their exact location. A slight movement caught his eye and he realized Ulquiorra was already down on the ground, moving quickly until he reached the closest barracks building. Ichigo followed him and pressed his back to the barracks’ wall. They quickly inched along it to its end, and Ulquiorra peered out from behind the corner. Shinigami Research and Development Institute was right in front of him, across the well-lit yard. The entrance to it, though, was on the other side, to their left.

Unnoticed, they dashed from one barracks to another until they appeared in front of the entrance to the institute. The research building seemed far away – across the wide yard and up the stairs. There were two patrols dozing at the entrance. Ichigo guessed that there were also guards inside to make sure the secrets of the institute never reached the outer world. During his previous visits to the Twelfth Division, Ichigo had never noticed this many guards, meaning they had tightened security after Ulquiorra’s escape. There was, however, no other way to get inside.

Ichigo and Ulquiorra met each other’s eyes and dashed forward, leaving the safety of the barracks wall. Already half-way across the yard, it was obvious that no matter how fast they moved, it was impossible to stay unnoticed. There was no way back, either. The guards at the door stirred and Ichigo heard Ulquiorra unsheathe his Zanpakuto. Ichigo reached for his own weapon and his stomach sank at the thought of a fight; he had hoped so much that they would manage to avoid this.

They were nearly at the top of the stairs leading into the building when an explosion shook the ground and a blast of air tossed them away from the building. Turning in midair, Ichigo landed on his feet and raised his head to see what had happened. Instead of Shinigami Research and Development Institute, he saw a smoking hole filled with debris surrounded by what was left of the walls. He turned to look at Ulquiorra, who was crouching next to him.

“Why are you looking at me?” the other man said after noticing the stare. “I didn’t do anything.”

With a grunt, Ichigo turned back to the ruins. The fire in the ruins was illuminating the whole square now, shapes and shadows dancing around. The smoke started clearing away and he saw two obscure figures walking through the debris. The explosion had woken up everyone in the division and probably all of Seireitei. Shinigami were filing out of their barracks and rushing to the yard. Familiar reiatsu was spiking here and there. 

The crowd scattered to the sides when a red Cero flashed through the air and imbedded itself into the white tiles the Shinigami had just been standing on. The ground exploded, filling the air with even more dust and smoke. Despite the general confusion, the Shinigami singled out the two figures in the ruins of the institute and counterattacked. They didn’t get far as a few more Ceros met them. A few barracks rose into the air and, their formation scattering, the Twelfth Division retreated.

The enemies were Arrancars. Ichigo could see them clearly now amongst the glow of Ceros. He held out his Zanpakuto and went for Bankai at once, donning his mask. When closing in, he took note that one of the Arrancars looked like a distant relative of Ulquiorra’s– albeit with a completely different face and a much larger body, he had the same mask that Ulquiorra used to have. The second one seemed to be familiar as well, but the red-head couldn’t put his finger on it.

Ichigo was met with a raised Zanpakuto and blades clashed, sparks flying around them. Metal screeched against metal as Ichigo pushed the Arrancar back. From up close, he seemed to resemble Ulquiorra even more – bright emerald eyes staring at him unblinkingly.

The red-head shoved the Arrancar back, making him stumble. Something glinted on his right and Ichigo was just in time to deflect a second Zanpakuto aiming for his neck. Fighting two Arrancars at once was going to be troublesome and Ichigo doubted that he could hold out for long. Ulquiorra had stayed back, having chosen not to interfere, so he was alone in this. He had to wait for the captains to show up.

Ichigo jumped sideways to avoid the Zanpakuto. The blade whooshed past him, barely missing his side. The other Arrancar was behind him already, and Ichigo turned to block the incoming Zanpakuto. At this rate, there was no thought about going on offensive – he was barely keeping up with them. The Arrancars also had superior vision to his, and the half-light wasn’t a hindrance to them. 

Ichigo grunted as one of the Arrancars pushed him back. The red-head staggered, trying to regain his balance, and the other Arrancar used the opportunity to slash at him. Half-falling and half-hopping, Ichigo tried to raise Zangetsu to deflect the hit. Before he could, though, the Arrancar’s arm separated from his shoulder and fell to the ground, his Zanpakuto hitting the tiles with a clang. Ulquiorra stepped on it and kicked out with his other foot, sending the injured Arrancar sprawling onto his back. His arm, though, was already regenerating.

Ichigo concentrated on his opponent, who was now aiming a Cero at him. The red-head didn’t manage to suppress it and it flew at him at high-speed. He deflected the Cero with Zangetsu, sending the blast towards the sky where it hit the domed shield and ricocheted back to the ground, hitting a building far away. The ground shook under his feet and Ichigo swayed lightly, his Zanpakuto missing his opponent by a few centimeters. He could sense a few powerful reiatsu heading towards the Twelfth Division, or at least to what was left of it. 

Ichigo felt Ulquiorra’s reiatsu shift and knew the other was now in his second form. He could hear the familiar hum of a Cero behind him, and soon everything was swallowed by a blinding green light.

Unlike most other Arrancars, these two weren’t talkative while fighting. Maybe that was why it was so difficult to kill them. Even though the Arrancar wasn’t able to overpower him, all of Ichigo’s attacks were beaten off. The red-head had the confidence that he could win – he was stronger and he still had time until his Hollow mask disappeared. The problem was that the Arrancar was a capable swordsman and he was perfectly able to compensate the lack of reiatsu with his skill. In fact, the green Zanpakuto seemed to be getting faster and more lethal every second. The Arrancar was grinning all the while, unnerving Ichigo. A few Shinigami tried to help the red-head fight, but the sheer force the Arrancar was emanating sent them all flying away.

“Don’t look at his Zanpakuto!” someone shouted. “It’s his ability – he’s pulling you into his pace and slowing you down!”

Only then did Ichigo notice that he had, in fact, not been looking at anything but the Arrancar’s blade. Even after hearing the warning, looking away from the Zanpakuto appeared to be an impossible task. The gleaming, green blade was hypnotizing. Ichigo couldn’t take his eyes off it; he could feel his movements slowing down. Soon the Arrancar began pushing him back, Ichigo hardly managing to beat off his insistent attacks. Adrenaline was coursing through his body and the only thoughts in Ichigo’s head were how to predict the next move, then the next, then the next. It was all about survival now.

And suddenly a green spear imbedded itself in the middle of the Arrancar’s chest. The Arrancar stared at the tip protruding from his body in surprise. He tried to slide off it, but Ulquiorra lifted his spear and slammed it back down, lodging it into the ground together with the skewered Arrancar. Even if impaled, he was still moving, his hand clutching his Zanpakuto, trying to reach and cut someone, anyone. Then Byakuya appeared seemingly from nowhere, set his foot down onto the blade, crushing it, and his Senbonzakura sliced through the neck of the speared Arrancar. The separated head rolled up to Ichigo’s foot, its mouth still grinning, then started fading away in a puff of black smoke.

Panting, Ichigo dropped to the ground and raised his eyes to look further down the yard. It seemed that the chaos was over: Renji was standing above the other Arrancar, brandishing his sword at his neck while Toshiro was trying to pull him away. The Arrancar seemed to be rendered motionless, his wrists and feet frozen in ice. It seemed like it was dead already.

“Are you alright, Ichigo?” Byakuya asked him while giving an askance look to Ulquiorra, who tugged at his spear, freeing it from the ground.

Then it all suddenly came back to Ichigo, the reason why he was here and the entire plan. He, though, still had his Hollow mask on and it was pretty dark. He jumped to his feet.

“Who is this Ichigo you’re talking about?” he squealed out like a five-year-old girl, thinking frantically that maybe there was a chance he could find a bag lying around to cover his head. “I’m new here and h-”

Ulquiorra rolled his eyes. “Stop it, you idiot,” he grunted, smacking Ichigo over the head. “You’re making a fool of yourself.”

With some hesitation, Ichigo dispersed his mask. Ulquiorra turned to stare at the burning ruins of the institute. He had a feeling that everything had gone much better than he or Ichigo could have imagined even in their wildest dreams. He turned back to Byakuya and Ichigo. The Shinigami were gathering around them already. Since he obviously looked and felt more like an Arrancar than a Shinigami, they were giving him mistrustful glances, and he dispersed his spear to show that he meant no harm. He did stay in his first form, just in case.

“Ulquiorra Cifer, right?” Byakuya stated, sheathing his Zanpakuto as well.

Ulquiorra nodded. Seeing as it was all over, Ichigo dropped from Bankai. He could sense more captains rushing towards the Twelfth Division, but his head felt completely empty. It was if he had suddenly lost the ability to think and reason. Thoughts didn’t take any substance, no explanations or excuses even started to take shape.

There was a swish of air and Mayuri Kurotsuchi materialized in front of the ruins of his institute.

“No! No!” he screamed in horror, throwing his arms apart. “My research! My samples! No! Impossible! No!”

Ulquiorra was tense, his fingers gripping the handle of his Zanpakuto. Ichigo lowered his hand onto his to make sure he didn’t draw the blade. Dazed, the red-head stared at the wailing captain’s back. He nearly stepped away in surprise when Mayuri turned around. Ichigo stared at the captain’s face. It was covered with slices of cucumbers and some thick white mass; he must have come right from his Magical Clinic.

Then, amongst the slices of cucumbers, the captain’s burning eyes concentrated on Ulquiorra.

“You!” he hissed, drawing his Zanpakuto. “What did you do to my institute?!”

Trying to shake off Ichigo’s hand, Ulquiorra gave him an annoyed look. “I never touched it. I wish I had, though. It exploded so beautifully…”

Ichigo nudged his side, and, glaring, Ulquiorra closed his mouth. Mayuri was approaching them and Ulquiorra shook at Ichigo’s hand again, trying to pull out his Zanpakuto.

“Let go.”

“You’re going to pay for this,” Mayuri promised Ulquiorra, his reiatsu rising. “You’ve got a lot of nerve coming back he-”

“He helped to defeat those Arrancars,” Renji said, uncertain of the situation. Byakuya was just standing near Ichigo silently, listening, and the lieutenant didn’t know whether he was supposed to intervene or not.

“Nonsense!” Mayuri spat. “He planned everything! Why would he be here otherwise?”

“It exploded,” Ichigo said. “Whoosh and into the sky.” He illustrated with his free hand, throwing it into the air, trying to encompass the enormity of the blast. “We never touched it.”

“You blasted it with a Cero!” Mayuri accused Ulquiorra. “My institute! You ingrate bastard, you… How dare you?! I made you!”

“That’s utter drivel,” Ulquiorra informed him. “You never made me.”

“How dare you?! I will m-”

Having had enough, Byakuya motioned at Ulquiorra. “Seize this man,” he ordered Renji.

“Why? He didn’t do anything!” Ichigo protested. “In fact, he…” He trailed off at the cold look on Byakuya’s face.

“He’s former Espada,” Byakuya said, “a part of Aizen’s Arrancar Army and he will be tried by Central 46 for his crimes against Soul Soc-”

“Who is Aizen?” Ulquiorra asked, drawing everyone’s stunned eyes to himself.

The shocked, encompassing silence was only disturbed by the soft flop of cucumbers that had peeled off Mayuri’s face in surprise and fell to the ground.

TBC


	19. Part 19

Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach – it belongs to its respective owners. This fan fiction is not a commercial project, and I am not making any money from writing it.  
Warnings:   
1\. Yaoi (male x male). Ulquiorra x Ichigo and vice versa. Other pairings?   
2\. Ichigo – almost 19 years old; Ulquiorra – probably a few hundred as a Hollow and about a decade or so as an Arrancar?  
3\. Post anime (haven’t read the manga).   
4\. Alternate Universe.  
5\. I’m not a native speaker, thus expect various language oddities.  
6\. I’m not very familiar with all the details in the anime, and I am also new to Bleach fandom, so I will be straying away from the canon quite frequently. I do my research but Bleach is a vast universe that is not so easy to grasp. I must admit, though, that there are also things in the anime that don’t make sense to me and I take the liberty of recreating certain parts of this universe as I see fit.

**The Heart in My Hand**

by chayron (lttomb@yahoo.com)

Part 19

Ulquiorra didn’t resist while he was being taken to the Sixth Division Barracks. He could have, since it was Renji Abarai alone who was accompanying him, and Ulquiorra was certain that if they fought, he would have a good chance of escaping. That, however, wasn’t Ulquiorra’s objective. Not yet, at least.

“Just imagine you’re in a resort,” Renji advised Ulquiorra helpfully, showing him to his room when they reached the barracks. He lit a torch near the door and carried it to the middle of the dark room.

Ulquiorra took a good look at the plain and rundown room he had been led into. “This is a prison cell,” he stated.

“No,” Renji denied. “You’re not in a prison.”

“Is this an interrogation room, then?”

“No, I’m telling you, it’s a resort!” Renji repeated, passing the torch to Ulquiorra. “Look around more carefully.” He walked back out and slammed the heavy door shut behind him. Then he opened the tiny slot at the top of it to take a look at Ulquiorra inside the room. The man was still standing in the middle of it, unmoving, taking the mess in. Huffing, Renji shut the slot and left. Leaving someone like Ulquiorra in there without any reiatsu dampening devices was the same as trying to confine a bear in a cardboard box. Not that it was any of Renji’s business.

Despite Abarai’s attempts to convince him otherwise, this was a cell. A very dirty cell at that. Ulquiorra glared at the piles of rubbish on the floor. There was a heap of empty bottles on the only table in the room. The two chairs in the cell were covered in smelly rags and old newspapers. Further investigation proved that there was a futon buried underneath all the rubbish. Ulquiorra prodded the flea-eaten futon and discovered five liquor bottles under it. They were full. This seemed like a hidden stash and, in general, a place for ill-bred men to gather and get drunk out of their heads.

A resort. As if.

Ulquiorra set the torch in its place near the door, lifted the futon, and gave it a good shake. It took several minutes for the dust to settle. Ulquiorra carried the futon to the other – relatively cleaner – side of the cell, kicked the trash out of the way and spread it there. He raised his head to inspect five tiny slits high in the wall. They served as windows and were no wider than his arm. Even if he climbed onto a chair, he would not be able to take a peek through them. It didn’t matter, though.

It wasn’t clear how long he was going to be kept in this cell. Frowning, Ulquiorra tapped an empty bottle with his foot. It rolled to the side. He walked to one of the chairs and shook the rags and newspapers off, then carried it to the wall and put it under the thin slit that was supposed to be one of the five windows. After grabbing a few bottles and newspapers, he returned to the chair, climbed onto it, and reached up to the slit. The papers went first, then the bottles followed, making a rather satisfying noise somewhere below, behind the walls of the cell. Ulquiorra went to get more trash.

If he had to stay here, he’d better clean this dumpster up.

\- - - 

Lost and unsure, Ichigo had watched Ulquiorra being taken away by Renji. Ichigo still wasn’t able to grasp the situation. It seemed that instead of criminals, they had somehow become heroes having saved the so-called day. It was too good to be true.

“Are you really alright?”

This was the third time Byakuya had asked him this and Ichigo nodded again. “Yes, yes, I’m alright.”

Yet, when Ichigo started walking in the direction that Ulquiorra had left, his knees suddenly buckled. Surprised, the red-head stared at the ground that suddenly appeared much closer to his face than he was used to; he found himself kneeling.

“You’ve been injured,” Byakuya told him, having finally realized that Ichigo hadn’t even noticed in the fervor of the fight.

At that point, the wire cord that had been strung in Ichigo all this time broke off completely and he felt an intense pain in his chest. Wincing, he inspected his chest with a soft groan. His Shinigami robe was cut, the fabric at the front slightly soaked with blood. After peeling it off his chest, it appeared that the cut wasn’t deep, the Zanpakuto having only cut through the skin.

“Um, I’m alright, I…” Ichigo started saying when two Shinigami from the Fourth Division rushed to him at Byakuya’s beckon. 

“Let them do their job,” the captain cut the red-head’s protests off. For a minute, he watched the relief squad poke and prod Ichigo then started walking away. He stopped and turned to Ichigo. “And as for why you are here… We’ll talk about this in the morning.”

\- - - 

When Ichigo woke up, it was past midday. He shot up in his futon and took in the unfamiliar room. In a second, he relaxed – he was in the Fourth Division clinics. This was a ward of some sort. He was wearing his Shinigami robe. The front was puffed out with the bandages that a member of the relief squad had wrapped around his chest. Ichigo had protested, saying that it was only a scratch and that there were people who had sustained more serious damage, but no one had listened to him.

The red-head got to his feet and went to the basin of water near the window. Washing his face, he started sorting through yesterday’s events again. The situation didn’t seem much clearer than it was yesterday. Ichigo started when there was a knock at the door, and it opened before he could utter a word. It was Renji.

“Finally awake,” he said at the sight of Ichigo’s dripping face. “Dry yourself and let’s go have lunch.”

Ichigo opened his mouth with the intention to question him but the only thing that went past his lips was: “Alright.”

They left the room and Ichigo found himself in a long corridor. Since it seemed like Renji knew his way around, he followed the man.

“Sir! Where are you going?”

Ichigo turned around to see a member from the Fourth Division closing in. They were almost at the exit of the clinic.

“Sir, you have to rest.”

“Ahh…” Ichigo hummed at the displeasure on the small round face that had wedged itself in between him and Renji.

“He’s completely fine,” Renji informed the nurse. He proved his words by giving Ichigo’s back a few demonstrative whacks.

Ichigo’s eyes crossed in pain but he managed to squeeze out a bright albeit not a very convincing smile. “I’m totally fine. Good as new,” he confirmed.

“No one leaves the clinic without the captain’s permission, sir,” the nurse told Ichigo sternly.

“He’s absolutely f-”

“Abarai, are you trying to bypass rules again?”

Both Renji and Ichigo turned to Unohana, who had appeared in the doorway.

Renji smiled politely. “Never, Captain. Absolutely not.” There was something about Retsu Unohana that made Renji fear her more than he could ever fear Byakuya or Kenpachi.

“Good morning, Ichigo,” she greeted.

Ichigo nodded to the captain. “Good morning.”

“How do you feel?”

Ichigo checked his senses again. “I think I’m fine, thank you. Just a little hungry.”

Unohana gave a satisfied nod. “It doesn’t seem like it will have any long-lasting damage. Go have lunch and then return to change your bandages.”

With a promise to return as fast as possible, Ichigo and Renji hurried out of the clinic. Renji took him to his favorite inn, which he visited when he wanted to taste something other than the food in the Sixth Division’s canteen or, more often, when he wanted some sake. That was what he got for both of them with the first order – a bottle of sake.

“Now tell me what the hell is going on,” he demanded while filling his and Ichigo’s cups with the clear liquid.

Ichigo accepted the generous gesture by emptying the cup in one gulp. “What happened to Ulquiorra?” he asked.

“Oh, your buddy is fine,” Renji said, emptying his cup in two big, loud gulps. “I hear he’s been doing some spring cleaning. In the morning, the captain was livid since the whole square in front of the barracks was covered in trash and stank of alcohol.”

“Huh? What trash? Spring cleaning?” Ichigo muttered, confused. He grabbed a piece of smoked squid from the plate.

Renji waved it off dismissively. “Never mind that.” He pushed the plate of squid closer to Ichigo. “Eat, eat,” he encouraged with a bright smile. “So how did you appear in the Twelfth Division?”

Ichigo’s teeth tore into the squid with relish; the cup of sake had made him realize that he had indeed been dying of hunger.

“I was stargazing,” Ichigo mouthed around the squid. “I was just walking down the street when something exploded! There were Ceros flying left and right! I run in to the Twelfth Division and see two Arrancars trying to kill everyone. So I jumped in to help.”

Renji pulled the bottle of sake to his side of the table. “Screw you,” he grunted reproachfully, pulling the plate of squid closer to himself as well. “You’re abusing my generosity.” He thought for a moment and added: “My intelligence too.”

Ichigo sniggered at that. He reached out for more squid but the other red-head slapped at his hand.

“What about Ulquiorra? Did he happen to be stargazing too?”

Ichigo gave the squid a longing look and shrugged. “That I don’t know. Which one of them was Ulquiorra?”

“I’m going to hit you!” Renji threatened him. “You do realize that you will be interrogated? And there will be no sake and they won’t be as nice as I am.”

“What did he tell them?”

“Which one of them?” Renji mocked him, grinning.

Ichigo sighed. “Ulquiorra.”

“Which one of them is…?” Renji trailed off at the look on Ichigo’s face. “Hah, don’t like that, do you? Pah!” he grunted. “He’s being interrogated now. They started about an hour ago.”

“Oh.”

Ichigo reached out for the bottle and Renji glared at him. Yet, he pushed it over. This was the second time that he had seen Ichigo needing a drink. The man had gotten up to his neck this time.

\- - - 

When the door opened, lumps of dust stirred, some rolling away with the draft. Otherwise, though, Ichigo noted that the cell was pretty clean. The smell of dust and alcohol, though, clung heavily to the walls. The red-head was certain that Ulquiorra wasn’t overjoyed about that. 

Ulquiorra was sitting on one of the chairs in the room with a bored and tired expression on his face; he had been interrogated throughout the entire day, from early morning to late evening. At the sight of the red-head, he motioned for him to sit at the opposite end of the table. Ichigo nodded, approached the table, and sat down.

“You alright?” Ulquiorra asked, eying the bandages under the red-head’s robe.

“Yeah, I’m fine, it’s just a scratch. Thanks for… Well, thanks.”

Ulquiorra nodded. He suppressed the sudden urge to pat Ichigo’s the chest. He wasn’t certain why he wanted to do that: either to show support or cause pain. Very likely, it was both. He saw that Ichigo sensed his foul mood and became wary. Ulquiorra turned to stare at one of the thin windows. 

Ulquiorra had come to Soul Society to make sure Mayuri ceased all possible experimentations on the material he had. He had also come here to make sure that there were no others like him. The objectives had been achieved. Yet, under other circumstances, he would have joined the two Arrancars and helped them escape. The clones had been vulnerable in their confusion after being locked in for so long, experimented on. They simply wanted revenge and freedom; Ulquiorra knew that only too well. And they had been deprived of that. Life was never fair. Ulquiorra had made the choice easily, too easily, and it baffled and annoyed him. He had practically sentenced two of his kind to death in order to save Ichigo. There were many reasons for his choice: gratitude, comradeship, sympathy. If faced with the same choice again, he’d do exactly the same, and yet, Ulquiorra was discontent. He felt like hitting Ichigo.

“How did you come up with that idea?” the red-head asked, not certain what had caused the atmosphere to tense up. “Did you have that version ready?” 

Ichigo was obviously talking about him pretending not to know Aizen. Ulquiorra shrugged. “No, it came to me after your extreme bout of stupidity when you tried to pretend you were someone else.”

Ichigo squirmed uncomfortably. “That was stress.”

“So it was,” Ulquiorra agreed. “Everything turned out better than you had expected.”

Speechless, Ichigo nodded. It was simply incredible how everything had fallen into places: Renji had told everyone that he had missed Ichigo and invited him over for a friendly drink. Ulquiorra, meanwhile, had convinced everyone that he had spent all this time in Mayuri’s laboratory and in no way remembered what the other Ulquiorra had done. According to the newest version, Ulquiorra had been woken up by the other two Arrancars but, instead of joining them, had decided to defend the innocent Shinigami. The story was farfetched, but there was no reason not to believe it since Mayuri had also chosen to endorse this version. To admit that a subject as dangerous as Ulquiorra had been running loose for a month, would have added to Mayuri’s already wobbly reputation. Not to mention that everyone was already laughing at him for letting two of his experiments destroy his precious institute. On the other hand, a few Shinigami had also sustained severe injuries. This was already not a laughing matter – Mayuri was conducting unsanctioned experiments. The most important reason, though, as to why Mayuri chose not to interfere with Ulquiorra, was that he was immensely interested in the strange Shinigami and Hollow hybrid. Ichigo suspected that he hoped Ulquiorra would simply be returned into his care.

Ichigo wasn’t certain how he felt about Ulquiorra’s version. Mostly, he was relieved, but when he tried to look at everything from a different perspective, there was one thing that bugged him. Ulquiorra didn’t show any remorse, he was probably never going to. In the past, he had chosen to follow Aizen, to kill and harm others in his name. Now, he just treated this as a past fact in his previous life. As if it never happened. But it had, and there had been deaths. The moral point of view baffled Ichigo, and he felt that this was completely unfair to the relatives and friends of the deceased. On the other hand, he had thought about it before and had chosen to overlook this until they put a stop to Mayuri’s experiments. Maybe it was alright and maybe it was not. Ichigo wondered if he really had any right to decide, he who had already killed Ulquiorra. How many times did he want Ulquiorra to atone for his mistakes?

A loud knock on the door and the shutter being pushed started both of them.

“Dinner time,” a voice behind the door announced. Without waiting for an answer, the door opened to reveal a Shinigami from the Fourth Division. He carried a tray of food to the table and lowered it in front of Ulquiorra. The smell of boiled carrots and cabbage filled the cell at once. It was a stew with a handful of meatballs swimming in it. There was also a cup of tea, a small loaf of white bread, and a plate of dried meats.

“Not bad at all,” Ichigo summed up after inspecting the food.

“Help yourself,” Ulquiorra said, pushing the meats over to Ichigo.

The Shinigami, who was already leaving, turned around to see the red-head chewing on a piece of stretchy meat. The other man was stirring the stew to cool it. Wondering to himself, he closed the door.

Afraid that there might be some listening devices, they could only talk abstractly. There wasn’t much left to say, though. 

Ulquiorra finished his meal and pushed it aside. It had been long time ago since he had tasted something other than a Hollow. It was not that the stew was not edible, but he wasn’t used to the exotic taste. He reached out for a strip of meat. It was some kind of animal, its spiritual energy a little higher than that of vegetables that they grew here. Yet, the taste was peculiar. He would rather hunt down a Hollow. Or have some of that delicious cake that the girl at Urahara’s made.

“When will they hold the trial?”

Ulquiorra shrugged. He had been questioned by five different Shinigami. Byakuya Kuchiki had been annoying. It was obvious that the man presumed most of what had really happened. Kuchiki had been the one to stay close to him and Ichigo when they fought and the captain must have realized that they were acting too familiar for people who had just met. Ichigo had yet to experience the severity of Kuchiki’s dignified determination. There was something about Kuchiki that made Ulquiorra want to cut his head off.

****

oOoOo_Six days later_oOoOo

Ulquiorra was sitting in front of forty-six men in the assembly hall underground. He was confined to a chair by a powerful kido and could barely move a muscle. The head of the trial was Genryusai Shigekuni Yamamoto. The current Central 46 was a laughable replica of the old government. After Aizen had assassinated all the former members, the new Central 46 was hurriedly assembled by Yamamoto himself. Ulquiorra was certain that all strings were in Yamamoto’s hands now. However, if anything, it might have made the policy in Soul Society more flexible and open to innovations. Yet, it was of no importance to Ulquiorra.

The jury members had made themselves familiar with earlier documented cases in advance and were now calling in the witnesses of the recent events. Bored, Ulquiorra had waited for Ichigo to show up, but he never came, the Central having probably decided that a Human had no business in attending Soul Society’s trials. 

Ulquiorra, though, saw many other familiar faces. For about two hours, he listened to the witnesses answering questions about him. Some hated or feared him, some were indifferent and just stated plain facts. After having heard all the testimonies, the jury had half an hour’s break. All of them filed out of the hall to confer in the room adjacent to it, and Ulquiorra was left alone. He tentatively touched upon the kido confining him to the chair. It was masterfully done but not invincible. 

Ulquiorra wondered if he would be sent to prison and how long it would last in that case. He was amused to think that maybe he would be placed in a cell adjacent to Aizen’s. He wasn’t certain if it would be a good or bad thing to spend hundreds of years with Aizen. He did want to see Aizen, since, despite what he had told Ichigo, he still could not help feeling as if he owed the man. Owed him at least one last visit.

When Central 46 returned, Ulquiorra was granted the right to speak. Interrupted and spurred by many questions that he had already answered, Ulquiorra repeated his version. Since their faces were covered, he couldn’t tell whether the judges appeared to believe him or not. Only Yamamoto sat in the middle with his face uncovered, and he was staring at him skeptically.

Ulquiorra’s interrogation didn’t last long, and the Central started to confer again. This time, they stayed in the same hall as Ulquiorra, ignoring his presence, since there was now nothing left that could change their minds. Finally, one of the judges stood up to pronounce a sentence.

“Ulquiorra Cifer, it has been decided that you are guilty of your crimes against Soul Society,” he announced. “You are sentenced to be exiled to Hueco Mundo.”

Ulquiorra thought that if Ichigo were here, he would have died laughing. The judge’s face, though, showed that he had more to say.

“Due to increasing concern about unsanctioned experiments and the damage they have brought, Mayuri Kurosuchi is now obliged to present a monthly report to Central 46.”

Ulquiorra didn’t like how that sounded. This was just a pretext for Central 46 to get their hands on the newest discoveries and, more likely, to induce them. Yet, this didn’t concern him anymore.

\- - -

When he left the premises of Central 46, Ulquiorra saw quite a big crowd gathered at the gate. Most of the faces were familiar to Ulquiorra from the night at the Research Institute. He guessed that the rest of them were the relatives of people he had killed or simply gawkers. Ulquiorra cast his eyes over the crowd. He couldn’t see Mayuri but he easily recognized Ichigo’s and Renji’s red heads. There were also a few captains amongst the gathered. When Ulquiorra passed the gate, he was met with silence, the crowd staring at him. 

Ichigo was the one who approached him first. “Well?” he asked apprehensively. Seeing that no one was accompanying Ulquiorra and he was walking freely, the red-head presumed that he had at least managed to avoid a death sentence. Then he leaned in closer to Ulquiorra to whisper, “Did you just kill everyone in there?”

Ulquiorra’s eyebrows rose. He thought that maybe that was what it looked like and that was why everyone was quiet, watching him with nervous dread. “Maybe,” he said just as quietly to Ichigo. “The only thing that is certain is that I was found guilty of my crimes against Soul Society.”

Uncertain whether he was serious or not, Ichigo watched him with suspicion. “And?” he prompted. “What’s the punishment?”

“I am to be banished from Soul Society.”

A little afraid, Ichigo asked hesitantly, “To where?”

“To Hueco Mundo.”

“To where?” Ichigo wanted to make sure he had heard right.

“To Hueco Mundo,” Ulquiorra repeated. “Yes,” he nodded before the red-head could ask him again, “to Hueco Mundo. I am to leave within three hours.”

“Well… well…” Ichigo fumbled for words, astonished. “Are you bullshitting me?”

“Doing what to you?”

“Lying,” the red-head explained. “You’re making fun of me, aren’t you?”

“No, I’m not. They exiled me to Hueco Mundo.”

“What’s the catch?”

Ulquiorra shrugged. “I will probably find out once I return.”

Confused, Ichigo scratched the back of his head. 

Renji, who had heard the exchange, looked from one to the other. “Doesn’t this call for celebration?” he asked, confused by the gloomy faces.

“Ehh…” Ichigo drawled. “I suppose it does. I’m just…”

“There’s nothing sake can’t fix!” Renji said, wrapping his arms around Ichigo’s shoulders and tugging him in the direction he presumed his favorite inn was. He nearly ran into a wall of white coat that was his captain. 

“I am certain you have duties to attend to,” Byakuya said. “I am still waiting for that report about you having lost your Zanpakuto. It’s long overdue.”

Ichigo gasped. “You lost Zabimaru?” 

“Are you blind, idiot?” Renji spat, patting at his side where his Zanpakuto hung. “I only lost it for two hours. Nothing happened, alright? Safe and sound.”

The look on Kuchiki’s face made Renji shut up since he realized he was only making his situation worse. Quickly and politely excusing himself, Renji hurriedly jogged off to the barracks to write his report. Byakuya motioned for Ichigo and Ulquiorra to follow him, away from the crowd.

“I am certain that you are the dangerous subject that escaped the Twelfth Division premises a month ago,” Kuchiki told Ulquiorra once they were walking down the street. He turned to Ichigo. “I am also certain of the fact that it was you who helped him get to the Human World.”

“Have you got any proof?” Ulquiorra asked. He grunted when Ichigo elbowed him in the side.

Byakuya glared at him. “Do you want me to have? I can certainly get some: Shunsui remembers seeing Ichigo here about a month ago, not to mention the bizarre reports from Rukia and other reports about Hollows escaping Karakura Town.” He stopped walking, making the other two men pause as well. “I don’t know how much, if anything, you remember,” he told Ulquiorra. “But keep in mind that I will be watching your every move. And you…” Kuchiki turned to Ichigo. He thought about what to say to the red-head then just left it at that and walked away; from the experience with Renji, he knew that it was pointless to say anything.

It was uncharacteristic for Byakuya to let lies slide just like that, and Ichigo stared at his back in both mistrust and confusion. Normally, Kuchiki would have reported everything he suspected and demanded punishment. Then Ichigo thought that maybe, just as him, Byakuya believed that Ulquiorra had already paid for his mistakes with his death. He could not help but feel there was another motive, though.

“Well, you’ve got about three hours,” Ichigo told Ulquiorra. “What do you want to do?”

“I have some business to attend to,” Ulquiorra informed him. “It should not take long. Then we head back to the Human World.”

“Um. Alright. Let’s meet at the West Gate.” 

Uncertain, Ichigo watched Ulquiorra jump onto one of the walls fencing the street and disappear in a series of flash-steps. He had a bad feeling about this.

TBC


	20. Part 20

**The Heart in My Hand**

by chayron (lttomb@yahoo.com), beta-read by Ash

Part 20

In near-total darkness, Ulquiorra descended a seemingly endless flight of stairs. Tiny lamps were scattered along the wall. It was damp, the walls sticky with some kind of moss. The steps were slippery and Ulquiorra had to tread carefully.

Finally, he reached the end of the stairs where the narrow passage opened into a wide hall. It was better lit than the stairs. Lamps encircled an enormous pillar in the middle of the hall. Not for the first time, Ulquiorra was curious about this peculiar blend of technology and medieval ages in Seireitei. 

He could sense three reiatsu on the other side of the pillar. Ulquiorra was suppressing his own reiatsu, and it made it difficult for him to pinpoint the exact location of the guards or how strong they were. Yet, he would have to get past them just like he had gotten past the ones outside.

\- - -

Sosuke Aizen raised his head at the tingle of familiar energy that reached his muddled and restricted senses. Even so, he recognized Ulquiorra. There was, however, something off with his reiatsu. In a moment, Ulquiorra stood in front of his cell, staring at him through the thick, metallic bars.

The Shinigami was confined to a chair, his body all but bound by black hands, only his face uncovered. It was dark in the cell, neither windows nor any other source of light present, just the lamp from the adjacent wall in the corridor.

“Have you come to free me?” Aizen asked.

“No.”

“Well, of course. Then to kill me?”

“No.”

The unspoken question of “why” hung suspended in the damp air but it didn’t seem like Ulquiorra was going to answer it. Aizen inspected Ulquiorra more carefully. It was not only Ulquiorra’s reiatsu that had changed. The Hollow mask was no more, as there wasn’t the Hollow hole in his chest.

“What happened to you?” Aizen asked. “I was told the Human kid killed you.” He could not help biting, “The one you deemed to be of no importance.”

Ulquiorra chuckled, the sound unusual to Aizen’s ears. “Yes, Ichigo appeared to be much more efficient than I had presumed. I was cloned by Mayuri Kurosuchi.”

Aizen took in the information and sniggered. “So he can clone Arrancars freely? I can hardly call that fair.”

Ulquiorra shrugged. “He is, however, not trying to raise an Arrancar army. The only thing he has achieved for now is getting his institute leveled.”

“So that’s what the earthquake was.”

Ulquiorra shrugged again. “I suppose.”

“He did make you,” Aizen pointed out. “Not a bad achievement, is it?”

“You were the one who made me. He just made a copy.”

An amused smile appeared on the Shinigami’s lips. “And yet you don’t want to help me escape…”

“There are limits to how many times one can be used.”

Aizen’s lips stretched into an even wider grin. He stared at Ulquiorra. “I killed Gin.”

Ulquiorra nodded. “Yes, I know.”

“Hm… Don’t you want revenge?”

“Revenge?” Ulquiorra repeated, surprised. The thought had never occurred to him. “No, I don’t. He knew he was going to die. He probably knew all of us were going to die.”

“He waited too long. He could have killed me if he acted earlier.”

Ulquiorra chuckled. “Why are you even saying that? You know why he hesitated.”

Curious, Aizen watched Ulquiorra. The changes were not only apparent outwardly but inwardly as well. In the past, Ulquiorra had never been good with emotions and was unable to fully grasp the reasons behind them. Yet, now he understood all the reasons perfectly well. Gin had been in love. Foolishly, recklessly in love and that was what had killed him. 

Ulquiorra stared at Aizen. This was the man whom he owed and had blindly followed. Maybe he still would if he hadn’t died. Strange sentiments were still present but Ulquiorra wondered whether he had them because of Aizen or Gin. Gin had been in love with Aizen and, as with most unreasonable feelings, had a hard time dealing with it. Gin had slept around either for fun or just out of plain bitterness. Most likely both. Most Arrancars abhorred the Shinigami in general. In addition to that, some of them were indifferent to sexual activity. Gin had had a limited choice in partners but he had made the most of it. With time, Ulquiorra had learned to enjoy the other man’s company.

Things with Gin had certainly been much easier than with Ichigo: usually, Gin had been the one to instigate sex between them, but he never refused when asked either. Ulquiorra understood the problem was due to his and Ichigo’s different backgrounds, but he couldn’t completely grasp the exact reason behind it. They liked each other’s company, Ichigo reacted to him, thus it baffled Ulquiorra, all the other additional factors that seemed to influence the red-head.

“Why did you come here?”

“Hmm…” Ulquiorra hummed softly, thinking of how to put his strange sentiments into words. “I could say I wanted some kind of a closure.”

Aizen let out a contemptuous grunt. “Eighteen thousand years is not such a long time.”

Ulquiorra wondered whether that was a threat or just a simple statement. It didn’t even matter. “I will be long dead when you come out of here,” he said.

The Shinigami pursed his lips in pretentious regret. “Don’t say that.”

“It is the truth.”

It probably was. Aizen sighed. “So what are you going to do?”

“First, I will return to Hueco Mundo. Then… I don’t know. Maybe I will start gathering an army?”

A soft snigger echoed in the cell. “You? An army? I bet if I went to check on you in a few days, I’d find you in a tree again.”

Ulquiorra couldn’t help but grin. Aizen was probably right. No, he was definitely right.

Aizen tried to shift in the chair to alleviate the tension on his body but the black hands squeezed at him even tighter and he sagged into the same position. He shook his head. “You can’t go back to that. Not the way you are now. No matter how nostalgic you feel about your previous Hollow life, it’s impossible now. It would drive you mad.”

“Would it?” That was a disappointment but Ulquiorra had suspected it – the changes were too drastic. 

Ulquiorra turned to go and Aizen frantically thought of something to say. Despite his outward stoicism, he cherished this opportunity to have a conversation with someone. 

“How did you get past the guards?”

Ulquiorra was already moving back into the corridor.

“They probably don’t know what went past them, but I do,” Aizen said almost desperately. “What if I tell them?”

Curious, Ulquiorra turned around. “Why would you?”

“Damn you.”

\- - - 

The alarm rang at about the same time Ulquiorra left the premises of the First Division. Unhurriedly, he walked the streets while Shinigami ran past him. Just as arranged, Ulquiorra found Ichigo waiting for him at the West Gate. He was not alone, though. The annoying nuisance called Abarai Renji was with him. 

“Great to see you, too,” Renji answered Ulquiorra’s glare. “So where did you go? And why are you wearing Shinigami clothing?”

Interested, Ichigo waited. He, however, was certain that Ulquiorra wouldn’t answer thus was surprised to see his mouth move.

“Sightseeing. Trying out the local culture.”

Ichigo rolled his eyes. Renji sighed and clapped Ulquiorra’s shoulder. “Isn’t convincing even one bit. But if we’re talking about sightseeing, I’m your man. I know the perfect spot we can all relax with a nice cup of sake.”

“I don’t drink.”

Renji gave Ulquiorra an insulted look. “Well, you definitely should!”

“Why?”

“That’s a stupid question!”

“I think it’s a very valid question,” Ichigo said, taking Ulquiorra by his upper arm and trying to pry him from Renji’s iron grip. “We need to go.” He gave Ulquiorra a look. “And probably fast at that, right?”

\- - -

Head buzzing with the sake he had drunk, Ichigo looked around. He was still mystified how, after all the protests, the three of them had ended up in the same inn that Renji had shown him before. He sipped more of his sake and turned to look at Ulquiorra, who was staring forlornly at his mug of tea. Ichigo suspected that the look was due to Renji’s enthusiastic prattle about his latest victory over someone named Sataru Kalima. They had already heard it four times.

“You told this already,” Ulquiorra notified Renji when he was about to tell the story for the fifth time.

“Hmm… Have I?” Renji slurred. “Then how about I tell you about that ugly Hollow I killed last week? Ah, right.” He patted Ulquiorra’s arm. “No offence intended.”

“I’m not a Hollow,” Ulquiorra repeated patiently, smacking at his hand. “And no, I do not want to hear about that Hollow.”

“Then how about…”

“No.”

“Mm… Then how ab-”

“No.”

“I think it’s time for us to go,” Ichigo said; Ulquiorra looked as if he was about to grab Renji by the head and bash it against the tabletop. Ichigo stood up carefully, trying not to sway too much. “We need to leave before something bad happens, but I’m sure it already has.”

Renji pouted. “Spoilsport.” With a sigh, he stood up. “I’ll see you off.”

Ulquiorra gave him a skeptical look – he doubted Abarai was in any condition to walk. He was also surprised to be proven wrong when the long-haired man smoothly wriggled out from under the table and slithered to settle the bill. Even Ichigo seemed impressed.

Ulquiorra found it funny how Ichigo and Renji, supporting each other, half-hopped and half-staggered all the way to the West Gate. At least they seemed to be sobering up. The ruckus caused by the alarm appeared to have mostly died out, but the Shinigami from the First Division could still be seen here and there. It would not be long before they received orders to capture him.

“Don’t worry,” Renji told Ulquiorra when they were about to part at the gate. “When I’m the head of Central 46, I’ll allow you to return.”

Ulquiorra nodded at the drunken Shinigami. “Thank you, but I would rather wait until it is Ichigo’s turn.”

Suspicious, Renji glanced at the other red-head. Not certain what they were on about, Ichigo shrugged and gave a tentative smile.

“I knew it!” Renji declared at the sight of the other red-head’s grinning face. “I totally knew it! You’re after a captain’s seat! That won’t happen! I was here first!”

“Yes, yes,” Ichigo nodded, catching on. “I’m certain you’ll make a good captain. The best of all. A splendid captain. The strongest there has ever been. And the wisest and, of course, the most charism-”

“Hurry this up,” Ulquiorra interrupted the unceasing flow of adjectives, “there is only about an hour left until I have to leave for Hueco Mundo.”

Ichigo’s face acquired a sarcastic look but he held his tongue back. He waved at Renji and went past the gate with Ulquiorra in tow. Once they were further away from Seireitei, Ichigo pulled out a small, decorative box encrusted with golden beads and opened it. A small, black butterfly rose into the air, making their surroundings shimmer and bend and a small gate appeared.

“Shunsui gave it to me to bring you back to the Human world,” Ichigo explained when he saw Ulquiorra’s questioning eyes. “You can easily open Garganta from there.”

Nodding, Ulquiorra stepped into the gate. Ichigo followed him and the small gate closed behind him. They suddenly appeared above Karakura Town. Suspended in the air, they stared at the few lights shimmering in the night.

“How about you get us closer to the ground?” Ulquiorra suggested.

Sheepishly, Ichigo scratched the back of his head. “I don’t know how.”

“Figures,” Ulquiorra muttered, jumping down. He fell through the air and released his Resurrection form, spread his wings, and softly sailed to the ground. The air crackled under the pressure of the powerful reiatsu and Ulquiorra dismissed his Resurrection form before it could cause any damage. Amongst the green rain, Ichigo’s back hit the ground next to Ulquiorra seconds later, a sizeable crater appearing in the asphalt. Greenish liquid started running into the trench, creating a puddle. At the sound of something crashing on the street, lights turned on in the nearby windows and faces appeared.

“Very graceful,” Ulquiorra complimented the red-head.

With a groan, Ichigo sat up. “Shut up. Easy for you to say. Did you find out what you wanted?” Ichigo asked Ulquiorra as he patted his clothes. He could not understand whether they were wet or covered in sand. The mysterious green liquid didn’t seem to stick to him.

“Find out what?”

“Don’t bullshit me. I know you went to see Aizen. It’s probably best you leave for Hueco Mundo as fast as possible, too. Before they send someone to retrieve you. It would be funny if they put both of you in the same cell.”

“Yes, I thought that it would be funny as well. For a short amount of time, though.”

Ichigo rolled his eyes. “At least you understand that much. Why in the world did you even go to see him? They released you safe and sound and you go and screw it all up and set them back on your trail. That’s idiocy!”

“Hm. It really is.”

Ichigo stared at him, waiting for Ulquiorra to explain but the other man shrugged instead. With a discontent grunt, Ichigo turned in the direction of his home. “A hero of ten seconds,” he mumbled regretfully. Then the red-head realized his house would be the first place the Shinigami would look for Ulquiorra and stopped. 

“Now, where to?” he muttered.

Ulquiorra gave him a searching look then, unexpectedly, jumped onto a nearby house and flash-stepped south. As expected, Ichigo followed him without voicing any questions. The best thing to do was go to Hueco Mundo at once. Yet, both of them were hesitating. Ulquiorra didn’t want to leave like this before getting what he wanted. He knew he would keep thinking about this missed opportunity and it bothered him. Ulquiorra hated being bothered. Especially when there was, obviously, no reason to be bothered. Meanwhile, Ichigo wasn’t certain why he was following Ulquiorra. On the other hand, he knew very well why, he just felt somewhat lost and agitated. 

They left the premises of the town, then the city itself. It was nearly midnight, but the sky was lit brightly by the moon, making it easy to pick their path. At some point, Ichigo realized that they were moving in the direction of the sea. It didn’t make much sense but Ichigo wasn’t about to question the other man. They never reached the beach, though, Ulquiorra stopping in a small clearing somewhere in the woods. Ichigo landed a few meters behind him and stood uncertainly, staring at the other man. Neither moved.

“Well, what are we doing here?”

Ulquiorra gave Ichigo a disbelieving look; the other man had already followed him all this way and was still feigning ignorance. This was both amusing and annoying. In a few quick steps, Ulquiorra approached the red-head. “Are you serious?” he grunted, planting his hands on Ichigo’s shoulders and pushing him back until the other male’s back hit a tree. Ichigo stiffened in alarm, his eyes widening slightly.

“I… I’m…” Ichigo muttered uncertainly. “I’m not exactly sure I…”

His meek response didn’t please Ulquiorra. He grabbed the other man’s hands, pinning him to the tree. “Believe it or not,” he told Ichigo, “I have run out of time waiting until you are exactly sure.”

It was undoubtedly true and Ichigo could only stare at him, sheepish. When Ulquiorra’s mouth covered his, he tensed again, thought about protesting and turned his head away. That resulted in Ulquiorra’s mouth pressing against the column of his neck, which was probably even worse. Ichigo moved his hands tentatively, but Ulquiorra didn’t even think of letting him go.

Having discovered the red-head’s weakness in no time, Ulquiorra’s mouth was now assaulting his neck. Ichigo closed his eyes and swallowed loudly. His head was buzzing with tension and excitement. He let out a shuddery breath and felt Ulquiorra’s mouth leave his neck. He opened his eyes and met a curious gaze. Ichigo stared back. This was probably the last time they would see each other. 

“Damn you,” Ichigo muttered.

Ulquiorra chuckled at the needy desperation in the red-head’s voice. He leaned in to kiss him again and this time Ichigo answered. The kiss was clumsy at first but quickly turned hungry and demanding, making Ichigo lightheaded and infecting him with fervor. 

Ulquiorra broke the kiss with a victorious snort. Ichigo’s back sagged against the tree for support and he kept his eyes closed. He knew Ulquiorra was grinning at him. Then he felt Ulquiorra’s hand settle on the back of his head and their mouths joined again. It took Ichigo some time to realize that his wrists were free and had been so for quite awhile. He wrapped his arms around the other man’s shoulders, gripping at the white clothes. He found it somewhat amusing that Ulquiorra had to tiptoe to kiss him.

Ulquiorra’s left hand smoothed over Ichigo’s chest and the red-head’s skin tingled with the feeling of the other man’s reiatsu. Under other circumstances he would have been alarmed by the rising reiatsu, but he felt no hostility. Ulquiorra was doing this deliberately either to turn him on or to confirm his victory. It was probably the same thing, though. Ichigo grinned into the shorter man’s mouth; Ulquiorra could be childish.

Then the red-head felt Ulquiorra’s hand move down. Without stopping, Ulquiorra traced him through the front of his hakama then gave a light squeeze through the fabric. Then he stroked again and Ichigo let out a soft sigh. It felt unbelievable to have Ulquiorra do that to him. The knowledge that this was probably the only time that this was going to happen was making the red-head strangely nostalgic and reckless. He could feel himself harden further and wanted nothing more than for Ulquiorra to keep touching him.

Through the countless folds in Ichigo’s hakama, the impatient hand found its way inside and palmed him. With a grunt, Ichigo leaned into the other man. For a moment, his world was reduced to his penis in Ulquiorra’s hand. The body against his felt taut and hard. He ran his hands over Ulquiorra’s back then rested them on the other man’s thighs. Ulquiorra was stroking him in slow, unhurried caresses and Ichigo’s fingers squeezed the other man’s thighs appreciatively. They were muscular and hard. Thinking about the stark contrast from what he was used to, Ichigo leaned his head back against the tree and closed his eyes again.

Ulquiorra took this as a cue and his mouth found Ichigo’s again. Their tongues joined and meshed together. Panting, they broke the kiss and, impatient, Ichigo delved into the other man’s hakama. Clumsily, he groped around and cupped Ulquiorra’s erection. This was the first time that he was touching another man like this. Ulquiorra was hard. A bolt of exhilarated excitement shot up Ichigo’s back. His slack hold tightened around Ulquiorra’s shaft. The back of his fist pressed against the pubic hair.

Ichigo stroked lightly. Ulquiorra encouraged him by giving him a few firm strokes in return. Light-headed with lust, Ichigo tried to match the rhythm. He wanted to make sure he was giving just as well as he was receiving. 

During the next few minutes Ichigo was only concentrated on pleasure, caring about nothing else. His awareness returned somewhat when he realized that he was about to come inside his hakama. Sensing his predicament, Ulquiorra groped around his waist with his free hand. Untying his sash with one hand appeared to be an impossible task and he let go of Ichigo.

Panting, fighting the urge to stroke himself, the red-head watched Ulquiorra remove the black sash off his waist. Vaguely, Ichigo’s ears registered the soft clatter of Ulquiorra’s Zanpakuto as it fell into the moss next to them. The red-head let out a satisfied sound when Ulquiorra’s hands delved back into his hakama.

Ichigo came with a soft grunt. Panting, he lowered his forehead onto Ulquiorra’s shoulder. The other man’s hands were still inside of his hakama. Ichigo’s face flamed up at the thought of the black sash that he could feel Ulquiorra wiping him with.

The red-head had stopped stroking Ulquiorra during his orgasm but now his hand picked up the pace again. The red-head’s free hand found the end of the soiled sash and pulled on it. Ulquiorra let go. It excited him when Ichigo took the initiative. He liked baffling, dominating the red-head but felt no less thrilled when Ichigo lost his cool and gave in to his nature.

Ichigo was just in time to save Ulquiorra’s white hakama from staining. He kept stroking the other man to prolong his orgasm then, making sure he had caught everything, let go. 

Ichigo’s forehead was resting on Ulquiorra’s shoulder since he didn’t dare look up. Both of them were panting softly. The red-head was holding onto the black sash awkwardly, not sure what to do with it. Then he was drawn back to his senses by a few Shinigami reiatsu sparking up not too far away. He raised his head to look south. 

“You need to go,” he muttered.

Ulquiorra nodded. “Yes.” He let go of Ichigo and leaned down to grab his Zanpakuto off the ground. Moving away from Ichigo, he extended his hand and started opening a Garganta. It was ready in several seconds.

“Well, goodbye and good luck, I suppose,” Ichigo muttered awkwardly.

“Thank you,” Ulquiorra said. He looked behind Ichigo where he could sense a few familiar reiatsu; they were very close now. He turned back to Ichigo. “Don’t forget to visit,” he said, grinning.

Ichigo rolled his eyes. “Maybe someday. Hurry up now.” 

Ulquiorra nodded and Ichigo watched him disappear through the Garganta. When Renji landed next to him, Ichigo could not help but think about the coincidentally fortunate timing. 

“Where is he?” Renji demanded and Ichigo felt the urge to step back at the smell of alcohol coming from his mouth.

Wondering whether Renji was sent here while still drunk or had made a search party of his own, Ichigo motioned at the empty space in front of him. “In Hueco Mundo. Why? Did something happen?”

Snorting, Renji took a look at the empty spot then looked around the clearing. “You could say that, yeah,” he spat. “Someone broke into the dungeons. I think we all know who it was.”

“Seriously? How dreadf-” Ichigo drawled, turning around when Yumichika and Ikkaku landed behind him. He waved at them. “Yo! How goes it?” Did they really expect to retrieve Ulquiorra with such meager forces or did they expect him to help out? “And who was it?” he asked, turning back to Renji.

“I’m going to hit you,” Renji threatened, looking around the clearing, but it was too dark to notice anything. Finding nothing out of the ordinary, he concentrated back on the other red-head. “I came here as soon as I heard about the incident but…”

“What?” Ichigo grunted defensively when Renji kept staring at him quietly. Then he realized that he was still holding the black sash in his hand. He had, in fact, used the same hand to show Renji the place where Ulquiorra had disappeared. “Ugh,” he muttered, embarrassed, and dropped the sash to the ground.

“You know,” Renji started, “you…” His intoxicated mind was having trouble coming up with an explanation and he fell silent. It was only too obvious what had transpired here. How desperate had they been to get it on in the middle of a forest? Renji just shook his head in disbelief and facepalmed before turning to his comrades. “We lost him. Let’s report and wait for further orders.”

Ikkaku, who had expected a decent fight, frowned. “Damn it.”

Yumichika rolled his eyes. “Report to whom, you moron? You drag us out to the middle of nowhere and then…” 

“Yeah,” Ikkaku interrupted, “let’s go back to drinking.”

Ichigo watched them open the gate to Seireitei and disappear one by one. Left alone in the clearing, the red-head wondered why he and Ulquiorra had even tried to avoid soiling their clothes. They could have easily summoned new ones. Embarrassed and mystified by the wild passion that he had just experienced, Ichigo stared at the black sash on the ground. He could barely see it in the darkness. If Ulquiorra expected him to pick it up and fasten it above his bed like some kind of a romantic trophy, he was insane.

TBC


	21. Part 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach – it belongs to its respective owners. This fan fiction is not a commercial project, and I am not making any money from writing it.  
> Warnings:  
> 1\. Yaoi (male x male). Ulquiorra x Ichigo and vice versa. Other pairings?  
> 2\. Ichigo – 20 years old; Ulquiorra – probably a few hundred as a Hollow and about a decade or so as an Arrancar?  
> 3\. Post anime (haven’t read the manga).  
> 4\. Alternate Universe.  
> 5\. I’m not a native speaker, thus expect various language oddities.  
> 6\. I’m not very familiar with all the details in the anime, and I am also new to Bleach fandom, so I will be straying away from the canon quite frequently. I do my research but Bleach is a vast universe that is not so easy to grasp. I must admit, though, that there are also things in the anime that don’t make sense to me and I take the liberty of recreating certain parts of this universe as I see fit.

**The Heart in My Hand**

by chayron (lttomb@yahoo.com), beta-read by Ash

Part 21

Unlike Ichigo expected, no one from Soul Society had come to question him. Ulquiorra had left to Hueco Mundo, everyone forgot about him, and their lives moved on. Soon even Ichigo pushed him to the back of his mind. He attended university, sat in lectures, chatted with his friends. He would have also frequented karaoke booths except that Timothy and Akio now had more interesting things to do with their girlfriends. They had also stopped inquiring about Kana, and Ichigo figured that she had slipped out of their memories.

Patients came to the Kurosaki Clinic, were treated, or sent to the hospital. Even Rukia’s visits stopped – Isshin had probably convinced everyone involved that, at the moment, returning to Seireitei wasn’t in his plans. Karin and Yuzu attended school as per usual, but now it was Ichigo’s responsibility to see them safely to and from it. If he had other plans, he would ask Kisuke or Jinta. Even if there was hardly anyone who believed that Excution would interfere with them anymore, letting their guard down, until they were completely certain, was unwise.

Ichigo had studied for his exams, successfully passed them and had a holiday break. He and his sisters had also visited Chad in MEOW a few times. Nori was growing fast and turning into a full-fledged cat that was uninterested in chasing balls or her usual toys. They would spend about an hour choosing new food and toys and just hanging about in the shop, watching the animals for sale. Ichigo and Chad had also arranged to meet at the Kurosaki house to celebrate Ichigo’s twentieth birthday.

The birthday party turned out to be a success. Eleven people – family members and closest friends – attended, and Ichigo couldn’t remember ever laughing or eating so much. A few days later, Ichigo had a repeat party with Kisuke, Jinta, Ururu, and Tessai. Even Yoruichi and Rukia joined in. Ururu’s skill in baking cakes was unrivaled while Jinta won every game they played.

Life couldn’t be better, and yet Ichigo had a vague feeling that something was amiss. There was a tiny voice in the back of his head that kept nagging at him to go and see how things were in Hueco Mundo.

**oOo_Two months later_oOo**

It was Tuesday, about eleven in the morning. Karin and Yuzu were at school. Ichigo and Kon were in the kitchen, arguing about the coffee that the red-head had spilt.

“It was an accident, I swear,” Ichigo repeated for the third time.

“No, I know you did that intentionally,” Kon said, glaring at him as he tried to wring the coffee out of his plushy head.

With unconcealed wonderment, Ichigo watched Kon try to twist his own head off. “You know, if you hadn’t gotten in my way, I wouldn’t have tripped and spilled the coffee. Just a thought.”

Kon pointed his wet, accusing paw at him. “I know you did it intentionally!”

Trying to ignore him, Ichigo sat down on the sofa and started drinking his coffee. He was half-way through his mug when he felt Rukia’s reiatsu appear in town. Wondering what news she might be bringing, Ichigo continued to sip his coffee. Next to him, Kon kept complaining about his wet head.

“Don’t worry,” Ichigo told him, “now you smell better than before.”

“Damn you,” Kon cursed him but had to agree that, very likely, Ichigo was right. It had been quite a long time since he had been unfortunate enough to get a spin in the washing machine. Even his yellowish-orange color was turning into a musty gray. Coffee stains were not going to improve the picture.

Rukia actually rang the doorbell. Impressed by her unusual politeness, Ichigo went to answer the door.

“Long time no see,” Ichigo greeted, letting her in.

“Not long enough,” Rukia said, huffing. She followed Ichigo, who lead the way through the corridor and to the living room. 

“Have you got time?” she asked once they sat down on the sofa. Kon rubbed his wet head against her leg and she kicked him aside mercilessly.

Ichigo looked at the clock above the kitchen door; today his lectures started at two. “Sure. Did something happen?”

Rukia shrugged uneasily. “I was ordered to bring you to Soul Society.”

The red-head gave her a worried look. “Why? What happened?”

She shrugged again. “Recently, large groups of Hollows have been attacking Seireitei.”

Ichigo sniggered. “Have they completely lost their minds?”

“No,” Rukia shook her head. “You don’t understand. These are not your usual Hollows, they’re much stronger. Of course, they were easily disposed of, but there’s a cause for concern since they seem to be getting more powerful with every new wave of attack. Something’s up.”

“Alright,” Ichigo said after a pause. “And what do they want me to do about it?”

“I wasn’t told, but they probably want to instruct you in case some of them appear in the Living World.”

Ichigo thought that there might be another reason – with the increased attacks, they probably needed another captain. “Ukitake,” he said. “Has a new captain been chosen?”

The Shinigami gave him an openmouthed stare. “Are you serious? You? You are a hundred years too young to be a captain! Literally. Forget it.”

His ego a little hurt, Ichigo scratched his head. “We’ll see,” he muttered.

ooOoOoOoo

He should have listened to Rukia.

“Can you repeat that?” Ichigo asked Renji, leaning forward. They were in the Sixth Division’s headquarters. Renji was in his chair behind his desk while Ichigo was standing in front of him.

Renji pointed at himself then at Ichigo. “Me. You. Hueco Mundo.” He raised his hand in front of Ichigo’s face with his fingers down and moved them as if walking. “Go now. Kapish?”

Ichigo straightened away from the desk. “Drop dead.”

“I’m already dead.”

“Die again. Why me? Why you?”

Renji rose from behind the desk and walked to the wall where his Zanpakuto was resting. He picked it up. “Go and ask Byakuya if you want. Personally, I don’t.”

Ichigo had to agree that he wasn’t burning with desire to bother the captain either. He was still grateful yet suspicious about the fact that Byakuya had let go of him and Ulquiorra so easily. 

“So we go and check where those powerful Hollows come from?” Ichigo wanted to make sure he understood their mission.

Renji turned to him with a grin. “Yeah. Me. You. Hueco Mundo. Check. Return. Report. Got it?”

“Screw you sideways. Isn’t it dangerous with those powerful Hollows around?”

Pushing his Zanpakuto behind his belt, Renji sniggered. “We’ve fought Arrancars, and now you’re worried about a few measly Hollows?”

Ichigo glared at him. “You can laugh, but all of this smells fishy, and it never hurts to be careful.”

“Yeah, right. If you ask me, I think they’re sending one too many.”

“I don’t.”

“You’re being unexpectedly bitchy today.”

“Go to hell.”

ooOoOoOoo

Ichigo upturned his head to stare at the endless gray sky. A few stray clouds were slithering past the crescent moon. The lifeless atmosphere was strangely soothing. He and Renji had stopped talking about two hours ago when Renji had unwittingly turned the topic towards sake. The subject had made Renji’s mouth dry up, and his eyes water in need. Now Ichigo was convinced that his friend was a budding alcoholic and had taken it upon himself to try and put some sense into him. That had caused a bout of denial and anger from Renji.

The vast white sand filled Renji’s vision, and he shifted his shoulders uncomfortably. Despite what he had told Ichigo, he felt uneasy in Hueco Mundo. Few and far between quartz-like trees had eerie shapes that, from afar, reminded him of humanoid forms. It was unnaturally quiet, the stillness making his fine hair rise all over his body.

“Maybe we should go to the Forest of Menos,” Ichigo suggested, disappointed by the lack of activity in the desert. All they had been able to feel were tiny specs of energy not even worth checking out; if they wanted information, they had to find at least one Hollow.

“We’ve just gotten here,” Renji muttered.

“We’ve been walking for eternity.”

“No more than for three or five hours,” Renji said with a snigger. “You know, this would be much easier if you just found your boyfriend and asked him.”

“Piss off,” Ichigo told him, face red with anger. He wanted to add something about Renji’s drinking problem in retaliation, but then his eyes caught movement further in the distance and he quieted. “Look,” he said, pointing. “I think there’s a Hollow over there.”

To prevent the Hollow from escaping, they rushed forward to catch it unaware. They needn’t have worried since, already half-way, they saw that not only did the Hollow not intend to escape, it was moving towards them.

“I guess he thinks we’re an easy lunch,” Ichigo surmised, watching the Hollow approach. “He’s in for a surprise.” The male Hollow was covered in tufts of dark hair but was small in size, with a goat-like face and horse-like legs. He was grinning widely, his large black teeth glinting in the moonlight.

Ichigo slowed down and watched Renji and the Hollow collide in a blur of kicks and punches. In seconds, the Hollow whooshed past Ichigo and hit the sand with a painful shriek. He somehow managed to get to his hooves and was about to make his escape when Ichigo’s hand settled on his dark-haired shoulder.

“Now, now,” Ichigo said in a calming voice. “We just have a few questions.”

The Hollow tried to shake off Ichigo’s hand. When that didn’t work, he struck out with his fist. Ichigo whacked the Hollow over his left ear, sending him sprawling into the sand again. “Stop it. We just need some information.”

“What information?” the Hollow rasped out, losing hope. He stood up again. His shoulders hunched and his eyes darting around, he was ready to bolt away at any time.

“There’s been some kind of disturbance in Soul Society,” Ichigo explained. “We want to know where the Hollows are coming from. And why.”

“What Hollows?” the hairy Hollow asked. “How do they reach Soul Society?”

“You’re supposed to interrogate him,” Renji noted Ichigo drily. “Instead, you’re feeding him information.”

Ichigo unsheathed his Zanpakuto to threaten the Hollow. “Where do those Hollows come from?”

The unfortunate Hollow gave him a bewildered look. “From here?”

Renji rolled his eyes. “Do you know where Ulquiorra is?” he asked. He could understand that Ichigo was reluctant to pose the question, but this was ridiculous.

The Hollow seemed taken aback. “Do you mean King Cifer?”

Ichigo sputtered. “King Cifer? Who died and made him king?”

“Well…” the Hollow drawled uncertainly, “the previous lord has…”

With a groan, Ichigo sheathed Zangetsu. Figures. So this was the reason he had been asked to come here. Byakuya knew that he and Ulquiorra got along well and… Who could know what was going on in Hueco Mundo better than its king? Byakuya should have told him, though. Ichigo glared at Renji, who wasn’t even hiding his amusement. 

“Where can I find him?” Ichigo asked. “He does live somewhere, right? A palace maybe?”

“Ah, yes, he has that,” the Hollow confirmed, and Ichigo couldn’t help but feel that Ulquiorra’s hurried ascension to kingship was somewhat unfair. “It’s in Las Noches, though.”

“That’s not a problem,” Ichigo said. “We’ve got time. Lead the way.”

It appeared to be a long way. They walked for nearly four hours straight, and Ichigo’s legs were about to fall off. They were also attacked a few times by random Hollows, but Renji enjoyed scaring and chasing them away. 

Finally, they reached the palace, or what was left of it. Ichigo whistled at the sight of the bare pillars. Rooms and halls were no more. Not even the throne room. Where the dome should have been standing was only a massive hole. The ground around it was scattered with broken blocks of stone and other debris. To the left of the crater there was a working fountain. Amazed, Ichigo stared at five mangy Hollows that were pumping water, making sure the shimmering cascade never ceased. It looked to be an absolutely pointless task – there was no one around.

“What are they doing? What happened here?”

“King Cifer happened,” the Hollow answered with a snigger. “Whoosh,” he said, imitating a Cero’s distorted sound. He threw his hands into the air. “Baam!”

“Interesting,” Ichigo muttered. “So where is he?”

“King Cifer? I don’t know. He can be anywhere.”

“It’s obvious he doesn’t live here! You led us on!” Renji sputtered. “Give me a minute, then I’ll kill you.” He waved at the Hollows by the fountain. “Hey, you lot! Come here!” The Hollows chattered fearfully amongst themselves, but instead of coming closer, continued to pump water.

The hairy Hollow frowned at Renji. “You wanted to see the palace, didn’t you?”

“No, you idiot, we wanted to see Ulquiorra! And the faster, the better! Take us to him already!” the red-head demanded.

“He lives south of here, in a little house his subordinates have made for him.”

“Awesome,” Ichigo grunted mockingly. “So all this walking was for nothing!” He met the Hollow’s red eyes. “You know, if you make us walk around needlessly again, I’ll really let him kill you. No, I’ll kill you myself.”

They travelled another three hours, and Ichigo had the irksome feeling that they were walking back to where they had come from. His feet were swelling and he started cursing in his head with every step. Finally, the Hollow stopped.

“There it is,” the Hollow said, pointing at a silhouette from afar. “His Majesty’s cottage.”

Excited, Ichigo squinted to look at the building further amongst the dunes. When Ichigo and Renji came closer, Ichigo decided that it looked more like an outhouse than a cottage. Near the pathetic structure there was a big tree. Normally, he wouldn’t have noticed it, but the wastelands of Hueco Mundo didn’t boast of many trees. It was a miracle it had managed to survive at all and grow this big. Ichigo suddenly realized why Ulquiorra had chosen this place to live. It had to be the same tree he had converged with years ago.

The house was small with tiny, lopsided windows. There were cracks between the boards in a few places. A shape could be seen moving inside. The red-heads approached the shabby cottage and Ichigo knocked on the wobbly door. They waited a little but no one answered, and they couldn’t hear any movement inside. Ichigo knocked again.

“Go away!”

Confused, Ichigo stared at the door, trying to remember who the voice belonged to. He knocked again. This time he heard steps coming closer to the door and it flew open, nearly hitting Ichigo in the face.

“I told you to go screw yourself! What d-? You…” Grimmjow hissed at the sight of Ichigo. “I’ll kill you!” he threatened, grabbing at his Zanpakuto. “This time for sure! I’ll kill y-!”

A pale palm appeared from the shadows in the doorway and slammed Grimmjow’s head against the doorframe.

“He says long time no see,” Ulquiorra translated for Ichigo. Staring at both red-heads, he removed his hand, letting Grimmjow’s unconscious body slide against the wall. “Well, come on in,” he motioned for Renji and Ichigo, moving aside to let them pass.

“Umm…” Ichigo hummed uncertainly, stepping over the Arrancar. “You seem well,” he said while following Ulquiorra. “You’ve regained your normal body weight.”

“Yes,” Ulquiorra agreed. “You don’t seem too bad yourself. Your hair is longer.”

Renji sniggered, and Ichigo gave him the finger.

The royal cottage seemed to be bigger inside than Ichigo had initially thought. Ulquiorra led them to what appeared to be a bedroom with two crude beds, one chair and a crooked table. There was also one tiny window covered with cellophane that was fluttering slightly. Poor and shabby, but Ichigo was certain Ulquiorra couldn’t care less. Ulquiorra motioned for them to sit, and Ichigo and Renji chose the floor, which Ichigo regretted at once as it was strewn with sand.

There was a noise in the corridor and they turned to see Grimmjow rushing into the room. The blow to his head had been strong and he was swaying, holding onto the wall. “Why did you let them in? Kill th-”

“He says he’s overjoyed to see you,” Ulquiorra said, removing the handle of his Zanpakuto into Grimmjow’s stomach. He let the Arrancar drop to the floor in a doubled over and coughing heap.

“Yeah, right,” Renji spat.

“He just might be,” Ulquiorra told the red-head meaningfully. “Maybe he’s just annoyingly shy. Like someone else I know.”

“Uh,” Ichigo grunted uncomfortably, fighting the blush off his cheeks.

Renji grinned. Unexpectedly, he felt that he was starting to like Ulquiorra.

Ulquiorra sat down on the chair, which started wobbling sideways. He noticed Ichigo staring at it. “It’s not exactly what you imagined, is it?”

“I don’t think I even tried imagining anything. And it’s not too bad. I’m more interested in how you’ve become the king,” Ichigo said curiously.

With a sigh, Ulquiorra leaned back in the chair. He pointed at Grimmjow, who was picking himself up off the floor. “This self-proclaimed idiot king of Hueco Mundo attacked me as soon as I returned. The rest was the natural course of events.”

Ichigo grinned at Grimmjow. So he had foolishly become Ulquiorra’s lackey. The Arrancar seemed to have finally gotten the hang of the situation and, without voicing anymore protests, wobbled over to one of the beds, dropping his heavy body onto it. From there, he just kept staring at the uninvited guests accusingly.

Ichigo looked around. “I’m surprised you’ve found enough wood to build a house.”

“That wasn’t me. It was Grimmjow. And the house appeared because he kept wishing for it,” Ulquiorra said, pointing at the Arrancar. He sniggered, amusement clear in his voice. “A place where he could live with his lover. So romantic, don’t you think so?”

“His lover?” Ichigo gave Grimmjow and Ulquiorra a suspicious look. “So he built it?”

“No, he wished for it. Sometimes, if you want something very much, it might just happened,” Ulquiorra explained. “Or it might not.”

“Huh,” Ichigo grunted, not having understood. The fact was, however, that Ulquiorra had usurped the house. But maybe it was alright since Grimmjow had tried to kill him.

“Things can appear and disappear in Hueco Mundo,” Renji explained to Ichigo. “The Reishi concentration is so high here that sometimes sheer will is enough to wish things into existence or out of it.”

“Ah so…” Ichigo drawled, trying to wrap his mind around the fact.

“Well, now I have made this my base,” Ulquiorra stated proudly.

A base? Ichigo looked around again. There was a big chance that if the four of them farted simultaneously, this poor excuse of a building would just collapse on them.

“Have you seen any other Arrancars or Espada?” Ichigo asked, having decided to sidestep any further conversations about the house.

“No, only him,” Ulquiorra said. “I haven’t been looking for others, though, if that’s what you wanted to know.”

Ichigo nodded. He knew that Ulquiorra simply didn’t care about the other Arrancars. The only way he would see them would be if they came looking for him. Ichigo was certain that this was what happened with Grimmjow.

“Anyway,” Ulquiorra said, shifting in the chair, trying to balance it and failing. “Is this a friendly or a business visit?”

“A friendly business visit.”

“Oh? Interesting.”

“He missed you terribly,” Renji told Ulquiorra. “He hung that sash over his bed as a proof of his loyal h-”

“I’m going to kill you,” Ichigo hissed, glaring at Renji. “You just wait until we leave.”

“Why wait?” Ulquiorra asked. “Want me to help out?”

“No, I think you’re busy enough with your own ‘Renji’,” Ichigo said, pointing at Grimmjow on the bed.

“True.”

“Have you got any sake?”

“Renji, shut up!”

“No, I told you I don’t drink. By the way, Ichigo, did you really hang it above your b-?”

“Of course not, you idiot!” Ichigo growled at Ulquiorra. “Who would put something like that ov-”

A grin stretched over Ulquiorra’s face. “Then where did you hang it?”

Ichigo threw his hands up into the air. “Argh! I didn’t! Shut up, both of you!”

“High five!” Renji exclaimed, holding his palm out to Ulquiorra. He lowered it as Ulquiorra just stared at his hand, uncomprehending what was expected of him.

“Anyway,” Ichigo hissed, “let’s get down to business.”

\- - - 

“So what do we do about those Hollows?”

Ulquiorra gave Ichigo a look. “Why are you asking me? I said I have no idea where they come from.”

Renji looked from one to the other. “You know, Ulquiorra, you aren’t making this easier, either.”

“Am I supposed to?”

“Um. Well, that depends on whether you’re interested. You, for example, could take him out for a walk, buy him flowers, or build him a sandcastle or something.”

“The hell are you talking about?” Grimmjow growled from his bed.

“These two…”

“Shut up. Ulquiorra, can’t you just show us around?” Ichigo asked. “Haven’t you got any clues?”

“Show you around where?” Ulquiorra grunted. “It’s a desert out there. It would take hundreds of years to search.”

“I think I know exactly what you’re looking for,” Grimmjow said, sitting up in his bed. He cast a not-too- friendly look at the other three males. “There’s something near the pit.”

“What is?” Ulquiorra asked.

“A pit?” Ichigo wondered.

“Is that the same pit I’m thinking of?” Renji asked.

“I have no idea what pit you’re thinking of,” Grimmjow told him. He turned to Ulquiorra. “For several days in a row I’ve noticed an unusual amount of Hollows gathering around it.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Ulquiorra demanded.

“I didn’t think it was anything special.”

Ulquiorra gave him a cold, mistrustful look. “Right. Let’s get it checked out.” Standing up from his wobbly chair, he turned to Ichigo. “Be on your guard.”

“What pit are we talking about?” Ichigo asked, getting off the floor. “As far as I know, the Forest of Menos is underneath us.”

“The pit goes beyond it,” Ulquiorra said. He walked into the corridor, motioning for the others to follow him. “No one knows if it has a bottom or what’s there. It goes all the way down past Menos Forest and further. If you fall into it, you’re done for.”

Renji cleared his throat. “Actually, it’s believed that it’s bottomless. But no one knows for certain – no one’s ever returned. All the spirit particles in Hueco Mundo come from that pit. There’s something in there that produces enough power to uphold the whole of Hueco Mundo. Maybe Hueco Mundo came from it. The closer you are to the pit, the higher the probability that your thoughts will materialize.”

“Oh. No wonder Hollows are gathering there.”

“Um,” Renji drawled. He and Ichigo were the last to step into the desert and he closed the door. The vast sands and dark sky made the place between Renji’s shoulder blades itch again; he hated Hueco Mundo. He looked at Ulquiorra’s and Grimmjow’s backs; they had started flash-stepping south. Renji urged Ichigo to follow them.

“Actually,” Renji continued with the topic, “the pit is pretty much useless. Like this house,” he whispered softly, making certain Ulquiorra didn’t hear. “You never know what you’ll get. Most of the time it’s random objects. But the main thing is that it is believed that one needs large amounts of reiatsu for a greater probability.”

“Reiatsu?” Ichigo asked, confused. “How so?”

“Sacrifices.”

Ichigo nearly stopped. “They throw people down there?”

Renji shook his head. “Not normally, I think. It’s mostly a myth, I suppose. I remember that a few kings had tried pushing crowds of Hollows down there, but all they got for their trouble was a few clouds and a fountain.”

“The fountain can be still found near the palace ruins,” Ulquiorra said absentmindedly. “I didn’t want to touch it.”

“Did those Hollows come with the fountain?” Ichigo asked. “Like six for a price of one?”

“What Hollows?” Ulquiorra asked. “Oh, those. No, they were being annoying, so I told them I would kill them if they stopped pumping the water.”

“If we talk about water,” Ichigo said, “it’s the only place I’ve ever seen water in Hueco Mundo.”

Ulquiorra nodded. “Yes, and it never evaporates.”

“Why did you destroy the palace?” Ichigo asked curiously.

Ulquiorra was quiet for some time and it seemed that he wouldn’t answer. “The era of old kings and Aizen has come to an end,” he finally said. “It felt natural to get rid of it.”

“It wasn’t natural at all,” Grimmjow protested. “It had splendid chambers and a magnificent throne room. What a waste!”

Ulquiorra shrugged.

TBC


End file.
